Bible Study by Atheists Weekly: Joel Chapters 1 - 3 Wrap up, Contradictions and Patreon Teaser

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[00:00:48] Wife! Guess what we're doing today? Well, we're starting a new book. We sure as fuck are. Yeah, we just finished Hosea, which means that today we're getting into... Not Ho's head, but Joel. Alright, do you have some information before we hop into the episode?

[00:01:03] Yeah, there's only three chapters and I'm super excited because that's going to be just another one we finish real quick.

[00:01:10] Yeah, so this is the 29th book of the Bible. Okay. And I believe we're... Are you giving us a summary now or when we get into the episode? When we get into the episode. Okay, okay, okay. Yeah. Alright, so you ready to do this? Yes, I am. Let's do it. Okie dokie.

[00:01:31] Alright, before we start the book of Joel, I thought we would be like, what's a book of Joel?

[00:01:37] Yeah, what the fuck is it? Yeah. Like... Is it a Jeff? Is it a John? Is it a... I couldn't remember what it was called and you said Jeff and like that's stuck in my brain and forever after this is the book of Jeff.

[00:01:49] Yeah. I just can't because that is too fucking funny. Book of Joel. Book of Joel, but Jeff. Or if you want to be real fancy, G-off.

[00:01:58] Right, yeah. We knew a G-off once. The spelling was G-E-O-F-F. Yeah. Like what is that like German or something? I don't know. I don't know.

[00:02:07] I don't know. One of those European countries. But it threw me off. I hadn't seen it spelled like that until we worked together at the bookstore.

[00:02:12] Yeah. At Borders. Yeah. Yep. He was the one of the music department manager guys.

[00:02:18] Yeah, he was. Yeah. I think. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. G-off worked over in music. Yes, he did. Got it. Got it. Okay.

[00:02:24] Alright, so who is Joel? Let's answer that question. Okay. Okay. Yep. Today we meet Joel.

[00:02:30] Alright. An Old Testament prophet who kind of appears out of nowhere. Oh.

[00:02:35] Yeah. Like he just like runs in the room, says some things and then runs out.

[00:02:39] Joel here. And now I'm out. Mic drop. Yep.

[00:02:42] Okay. I actually have a mic drop later. Do you? Literally. Yeah. In this intro. Okay.

[00:02:46] Yeah. He drops some heavy warnings and then vanishes back into obscurity. Hmm. Okay.

[00:02:52] Okay. His name means the Lord is God or Jehovah is God or something is God. Very God.

[00:02:59] Sure. God. Got it.

[00:03:01] But other than that, nobody seems to know much about him because like I said.

[00:03:04] He's Joel or Jeff or John. Yeah. He just runs in the room. Whatever. With Joel.

[00:03:06] And he's like, you guys suck. Peace out.

[00:03:10] Except that he was the son of some guy named Pethuel, which doesn't tell us much except

[00:03:15] that Pethuel must be very proud.

[00:03:20] My dude did not leave a paper trail, but scholars guess he was from Judah since he never bothered

[00:03:26] to mention Israel.

[00:03:27] Okay.

[00:03:27] Okay.

[00:03:28] All right.

[00:03:28] So, yeah, I guess we don't know much about him.

[00:03:30] Sure.

[00:03:30] Like I said.

[00:03:31] Yeah.

[00:03:31] Okay.

[00:03:32] He wasn't one of those temple prophets with fancy titles.

[00:03:35] Not one of those guys.

[00:03:36] Not one of those guys.

[00:03:37] He was a sandwich board wearing motherfucker.

[00:03:39] He was more like a street prophet.

[00:03:42] See?

[00:03:42] Okay.

[00:03:42] Yeah.

[00:03:42] Warning everyone about impending doom.

[00:03:45] I mean, that's not unsimilar to what other prophets do.

[00:03:48] Right.

[00:03:48] Right.

[00:03:48] Right.

[00:03:49] Mainly, he made proclamations that an ancient apocalypse was coming via a massive locust

[00:03:55] invasion.

[00:03:56] Ooh, locusts.

[00:03:57] Yeah.

[00:03:57] And that's like a big deal in these three chapters.

[00:04:00] Okay.

[00:04:00] So, let's segue into who's Joel and let's talk about bugs, baby.

[00:04:05] All right?

[00:04:06] That's my next section.

[00:04:08] Okay?

[00:04:08] Yeah.

[00:04:08] This bug invasion was seen as God's judgment and Joel jumped on the chance to tell the people

[00:04:14] of Judah to repent!

[00:04:16] Repent!

[00:04:16] Oh.

[00:04:17] But without naming any particular sins.

[00:04:19] Right.

[00:04:20] Because why would you?

[00:04:21] Right.

[00:04:21] Yeah.

[00:04:21] Specific.

[00:04:22] Get the fuck out of here.

[00:04:23] Whatever.

[00:04:23] You just suck.

[00:04:24] God's gonna kill you.

[00:04:25] Yeah.

[00:04:25] Yeah.

[00:04:26] Yeah.

[00:04:26] Depending upon whom you ask, the locusts were either literal bugs or metaphors for Israel's

[00:04:32] enemies.

[00:04:33] Right.

[00:04:33] Most modern interpreters, however, are like, why not both?

[00:04:37] Why not both?

[00:04:38] Yeah.

[00:04:39] Okay.

[00:04:39] Okay.

[00:04:40] They see Joel speaking of a literal locust plague given a prophetic and apocalyptic

[00:04:46] interpretation.

[00:04:49] Okay.

[00:04:50] So, kind of like the Gomer thing was like the opposite way.

[00:04:53] Sure.

[00:04:54] Right?

[00:04:54] Like, we're gonna talk about a pretend dude marrying Gomer who represents the whoredom of

[00:05:01] Israel.

[00:05:02] And there may or may not have been a Hosea who married a whore named Gomer.

[00:05:07] Right?

[00:05:07] Well, there was a Hosea from what we understand historically.

[00:05:09] Right.

[00:05:10] Right.

[00:05:10] From what we understand historically.

[00:05:11] But this is the opposite.

[00:05:13] There really was a locust thing.

[00:05:15] But let's talk about it as, you know, metaphor.

[00:05:20] Wait.

[00:05:20] There was a locust thing?

[00:05:21] There were always locust things.

[00:05:23] Because...

[00:05:24] But not like killed everybody type locust things.

[00:05:26] No.

[00:05:27] No.

[00:05:27] These were swampy lands that they got waterlogged and then drought.

[00:05:34] Waterlogged and then drought.

[00:05:36] So, there was always a season of fucking locusts that were eating all their fields.

[00:05:41] Oh.

[00:05:41] Like, it's just geology dudes.

[00:05:43] Okay.

[00:05:44] You know?

[00:05:44] Right.

[00:05:44] So, we can't even use the fact that there was like a plague of locusts as any kind of

[00:05:50] particular...

[00:05:51] This happened during that time period.

[00:05:54] Got it.

[00:05:54] Okay?

[00:05:55] Okay.

[00:05:55] So, all right.

[00:05:56] Let's talk about the book.

[00:05:58] The book itself.

[00:05:59] The book of Joel.

[00:06:01] The Joel book.

[00:06:02] Yeah.

[00:06:02] Jeff.

[00:06:02] The original text was written in Hebrew.

[00:06:06] Okay.

[00:06:06] So, that should tell us something, but it doesn't.

[00:06:09] Right.

[00:06:10] Authorship is traditionally ascribed to Joel, but this was challenged in the late 19th and

[00:06:16] early 20th centuries.

[00:06:18] Well, I don't know how you can not know who the motherfucker is and say that he wrote

[00:06:22] it.

[00:06:22] Right.

[00:06:23] How do you say, we don't know anything about this guy?

[00:06:26] There's nothing to attribute to him anywhere else other than these three things.

[00:06:30] But I'm sure he wrote it.

[00:06:31] But we're sure he wrote it.

[00:06:31] I'm sure he wrote it.

[00:06:32] Yeah.

[00:06:32] That totally makes sense.

[00:06:33] Yeah.

[00:06:33] But in the 18 and 1900s, they were like, hold your tits.

[00:06:36] I don't think so.

[00:06:38] Right.

[00:06:38] Maybe not.

[00:06:39] I mean, just based on what I know of it already, I'm like...

[00:06:41] I said hold your tits, but that was like a combining of hold my beer and calm your

[00:06:47] tits.

[00:06:49] You do that quite often.

[00:06:50] I do.

[00:06:51] And you do it so often that I'm just like, yeah, that makes total sense.

[00:06:55] Yeah.

[00:06:55] But it's always the funniest when I'm like, wait, what I just said makes no fucking sense.

[00:07:01] Yeah.

[00:07:01] So hold your tits is not the thing.

[00:07:03] Right.

[00:07:04] But I mean, if you want to do it, you just do it.

[00:07:06] Yeah.

[00:07:06] Yeah.

[00:07:06] So these guys in the 18 and 1900s were like, hold your tits, scholars.

[00:07:11] I don't think that's what happened.

[00:07:13] Got it.

[00:07:13] I don't think Jeff actually wrote this book.

[00:07:16] Okay.

[00:07:16] Joel.

[00:07:17] Joel.

[00:07:18] Yeah.

[00:07:18] Scholars have suggested that the first chapter was actually from the hand of Joel and dealt

[00:07:23] with a contemporary issue, the locust.

[00:07:25] Okay.

[00:07:26] While parts of the second chapter have been ascribed to a continuator.

[00:07:32] A continuator.

[00:07:33] A continuator.

[00:07:34] Okay.

[00:07:35] Somebody who continued it.

[00:07:36] Someone continued.

[00:07:37] Joel.

[00:07:37] Yeah.

[00:07:38] Yeah.

[00:07:38] That's the guy.

[00:07:39] That's who wrote it.

[00:07:40] With a more apocalyptic outlook.

[00:07:43] So chapter two is apparently going to pick up the pace of it.

[00:07:45] Hey, look at this shit that's about the locusts here.

[00:07:48] We could use this, guys.

[00:07:49] Yeah.

[00:07:50] Yeah.

[00:07:50] And then mentions in the first half of the book to quote, the day of the Lord, as opposed

[00:07:56] to the day of the time Lords.

[00:08:00] That's the name of an episode of Doctor Who.

[00:08:03] Okay.

[00:08:03] Yeah.

[00:08:04] The day of the time.

[00:08:05] Got it.

[00:08:05] The day of the doctor.

[00:08:06] That's what it is.

[00:08:07] Oh.

[00:08:07] Okay.

[00:08:08] It's called the day of the doctor.

[00:08:09] But this is the day of the Lord.

[00:08:11] Okay.

[00:08:11] Okay.

[00:08:13] So there's a mention of that in the first half of the book of Joel.

[00:08:16] The day of the Lord.

[00:08:17] The day of the Lord.

[00:08:18] Okay.

[00:08:19] Okay.

[00:08:19] Yeah.

[00:08:20] And we're going to talk more about the day of the Lord in a minute.

[00:08:23] No, they did not talk about Doctor Who.

[00:08:24] Yeah.

[00:08:25] They talked about the day of the Lord.

[00:08:26] Okay.

[00:08:26] Okay.

[00:08:27] And we're going to talk about that more in a minute.

[00:08:29] They were also ascribed to the continuator, not to Jeff Joel.

[00:08:34] Okay.

[00:08:35] So Joel probably didn't write that.

[00:08:37] Okay.

[00:08:37] That's what we're saying.

[00:08:37] Maybe.

[00:08:38] Okay.

[00:08:38] And the final chapter might have been written even later than that.

[00:08:42] Hmm.

[00:08:42] So three different chapters, three different authors.

[00:08:45] Maybe.

[00:08:46] Got it.

[00:08:46] So.

[00:08:47] Or the same author.

[00:08:47] So it could be Joel, Jeff, and John.

[00:08:49] Yeah.

[00:08:54] I did not see that going.

[00:08:56] That's so stupid.

[00:09:00] All right.

[00:09:01] Continuing on.

[00:09:02] Yeah.

[00:09:02] Of course, details of exact ascriptions have greatly differed between scholars.

[00:09:08] You don't say.

[00:09:09] Right.

[00:09:09] Yeah.

[00:09:09] Part of this is because nobody knows exactly when, when, not where, when the book was written.

[00:09:15] Right.

[00:09:15] Which, you know, that's what I said.

[00:09:16] Sure.

[00:09:17] But scholars guess, sometime between the ninth and fourth centuries BCE.

[00:09:22] Just a casual 600 year window because why narrow it down?

[00:09:26] Right.

[00:09:27] Yeah.

[00:09:27] Okay.

[00:09:28] I would expect you like 100 or 200 years.

[00:09:30] You know, you're like, whatever.

[00:09:32] Sometime in that, you know, millennia.

[00:09:34] Right.

[00:09:34] Right.

[00:09:34] Somewhere.

[00:09:35] Somebody wrote it.

[00:09:36] Yeah.

[00:09:36] That's all we know.

[00:09:37] It was words.

[00:09:38] Literally, we know that it is Hebrew and somebody wrote it.

[00:09:41] These are literal words here.

[00:09:43] Yep.

[00:09:43] They are words.

[00:09:44] In Hebrew.

[00:09:44] And they're in the Bible.

[00:09:45] In Hebrew.

[00:09:46] And they were written originally in Hebrew.

[00:09:47] Mm-hmm.

[00:09:48] That's it.

[00:09:48] Probably.

[00:09:49] Probably.

[00:09:49] Most likely.

[00:09:50] Right.

[00:09:52] Some commentators attach no great importance to the precise dating of the book, which seems

[00:09:56] a bit irresponsible, in my opinion.

[00:09:59] Why would you care about dates?

[00:10:00] Shit.

[00:10:00] So what a God, right?

[00:10:01] So there was one apologist that said, since nobody in this book made great attention to

[00:10:09] that detail, we should respect that.

[00:10:11] Oh, Jesus.

[00:10:12] I was like, fuck the fuck off.

[00:10:14] Get out of here with that nonsense.

[00:10:16] The generalizations that are made as an apology for shit that is not correct in the Bible.

[00:10:22] Yeah.

[00:10:22] They're so absurd.

[00:10:23] They're just.

[00:10:24] They're absurd.

[00:10:24] They're over the top.

[00:10:25] They are.

[00:10:26] They're beyond believable.

[00:10:27] They're so laughable.

[00:10:29] Yeah.

[00:10:29] Well, they didn't tell us, so we just shouldn't fucking worry about it.

[00:10:32] No, that's always the answer, right?

[00:10:34] Like, it's God's word, so why would we question it?

[00:10:36] Yeah.

[00:10:36] I don't know.

[00:10:37] I accept it as it.

[00:10:38] Because I don't accept that God exists, let alone that his word exists.

[00:10:42] Right.

[00:10:42] Exactly.

[00:10:43] That's why we should question it.

[00:10:44] Yeah.

[00:10:44] Because you guys are basing your fucking laws that you're trying to implement on me and

[00:10:48] my wife and my kid based on this fucking book.

[00:10:52] And yes, I am going to question it.

[00:10:54] And you're telling me, oh, you should just believe it, though.

[00:10:57] No.

[00:10:58] Okay, but prove it.

[00:10:59] Oh, this doesn't have any information for us.

[00:11:03] Wait, wait, wait.

[00:11:03] You forgot the next step.

[00:11:05] Well, you prove that God doesn't exist.

[00:11:07] Yeah.

[00:11:08] Yeah.

[00:11:09] Oh, I hate that.

[00:11:10] Like, oh, that's not how logic works, bro.

[00:11:13] No.

[00:11:13] There's lots of things I don't believe exist.

[00:11:15] And I don't have to disprove the non-proof of those.

[00:11:19] Why would it be any different with God?

[00:11:21] You prove God, and then I'll either go along with it or try to disprove it.

[00:11:25] But you've got to prove them first.

[00:11:26] Yeah.

[00:11:26] Yeah.

[00:11:26] That's how this works.

[00:11:28] You're the one making the great claim.

[00:11:30] Right.

[00:11:30] Not me.

[00:11:31] All I'm doing is sitting over here.

[00:11:32] And you're like, hey, there's a God and he says abortion is bad and that women should

[00:11:38] serve their husbands and all kinds of other patriarchal nonsense bullshit.

[00:11:42] And I'm just sitting over here like, wait, you're telling me all these laws right here.

[00:11:47] But your first sentence was there's a God.

[00:11:49] Right.

[00:11:50] And so I would like to fight these laws.

[00:11:53] Let's back up to the God thing, though.

[00:11:54] Yeah.

[00:11:54] Yeah.

[00:11:55] I'm going to put those laws on hold for the moment.

[00:11:59] And let's talk about this.

[00:12:01] No, you prove it.

[00:12:02] Wait.

[00:12:02] No, honey.

[00:12:03] You're the one making laws, sweetheart.

[00:12:06] Darling.

[00:12:06] Right.

[00:12:07] Cutie pie.

[00:12:08] Yep.

[00:12:09] Little kid person.

[00:12:11] All right.

[00:12:11] Anyway.

[00:12:12] Yeah.

[00:12:13] So they don't they don't know how to prove things.

[00:12:16] Right.

[00:12:16] Joel dropped references to some classic villains like the Philistines and the Egyptians, but

[00:12:23] not a peep about the Assyrians or the Babylonians, which supposedly helps date things.

[00:12:29] They could somewhat sort of.

[00:12:32] But again, who knows, though, apparently only within 600 years.

[00:12:36] Right.

[00:12:37] Exactly.

[00:12:38] Linguistic similarities to other prophets raise the question.

[00:12:42] Was Joel borrowing from them or were they quoting Joel?

[00:12:47] Oh, my gosh.

[00:12:48] Bum, bum, bum.

[00:12:50] Ultimately, we don't know anything about this guy.

[00:12:52] So why do we care?

[00:12:53] I don't know.

[00:12:54] Like it's three chapters.

[00:12:55] Right.

[00:12:55] Right.

[00:12:55] Yeah.

[00:12:56] So they're not even long chapters.

[00:12:58] The book of Joel in the grand scheme of things seems like a nonstarter.

[00:13:01] Just like who gives a fuck?

[00:13:03] Yeah.

[00:13:03] I'm only reading it.

[00:13:04] We're going to read it because it's in there.

[00:13:06] Yeah.

[00:13:06] But if you guys don't know anything else about this dude.

[00:13:08] Then stop.

[00:13:09] Why does it matter?

[00:13:10] Why does he matter?

[00:13:10] He doesn't.

[00:13:11] It's just it's just fucking locust, right?

[00:13:13] Yeah.

[00:13:14] OK.

[00:13:14] Whatever.

[00:13:15] Like that's any worse than whatever.

[00:13:17] It's just the same.

[00:13:20] Same old, same old.

[00:13:21] Either way, there's a whole lot of cross referencing going on.

[00:13:24] No to finish.

[00:13:26] Definitive answers are forthcoming.

[00:13:28] OK.

[00:13:28] OK.

[00:13:29] OK.

[00:13:29] Now I have another section called.

[00:13:31] I'm not weird.

[00:13:32] You're weird.

[00:13:32] OK.

[00:13:33] And I will have you know that I wrote the captions for these because I amuse myself.

[00:13:38] Yeah.

[00:13:38] OK.

[00:13:39] So the day of Jehovah.

[00:13:40] I remember I told you that or the day of the Lord.

[00:13:43] Yes.

[00:13:43] And I was like, we'll come back to that in a minute.

[00:13:45] Right.

[00:13:45] OK.

[00:13:45] So that thing is mentioned five times in these three chapters just in case you missed it.

[00:13:51] Oh.

[00:13:51] OK.

[00:13:52] All right.

[00:13:52] And it's like God's big showdown with his enemies.

[00:13:56] And it's often described as right around the corner.

[00:13:59] Of course.

[00:14:00] It's always right around the corner.

[00:14:02] It kicks off with God's glorious arrival for some serious judgment and some peaceful rain.

[00:14:08] Yeah.

[00:14:08] You know, even today, right now, the judgment is right around the corner.

[00:14:12] Right around the corner.

[00:14:13] Always right around the corner.

[00:14:14] Serious judgment and peaceful rain set up right around the corner.

[00:14:18] We're going to see.

[00:14:18] It's coming.

[00:14:18] We're going to see.

[00:14:19] We're going to see.

[00:14:20] You're going to be sorry.

[00:14:21] Soon.

[00:14:21] It's coming.

[00:14:22] Soon.

[00:14:22] Yeah.

[00:14:23] Just so we're clear, this is not the same as the rapture.

[00:14:27] You know, Christ's early exit strategy for believers.

[00:14:30] This is not that.

[00:14:31] OK.

[00:14:32] Yes.

[00:14:32] That's a separate event that everyone's still waiting on.

[00:14:35] Like the divine version of the coming soon sign that never gets taken down.

[00:14:40] Right.

[00:14:41] Yeah.

[00:14:41] You know, or close out sale because the store is about to close, but the store never closes.

[00:14:46] But it's always on sale.

[00:14:47] Yeah.

[00:14:48] You know?

[00:14:48] Yeah.

[00:14:49] Oh, here's another oddity.

[00:14:51] Ready?

[00:14:51] Mm-hmm.

[00:14:52] Joel has a twist on the classic beat your swords into plowshares.

[00:14:57] Do you remember that?

[00:14:59] Like put down your weapons and turn them into.

[00:15:01] Kind of.

[00:15:01] Yeah.

[00:15:02] Yeah.

[00:15:02] Sell your land.

[00:15:02] I don't remember where it was at, but I remember.

[00:15:04] It was in Isaiah.

[00:15:06] OK.

[00:15:06] OK.

[00:15:07] So Joel twists that the other way.

[00:15:10] He flips it, urging people to make weapons instead, because apparently sometimes peace

[00:15:15] just isn't on the agenda.

[00:15:17] Really?

[00:15:18] Yeah.

[00:15:18] He says it exactly backwards.

[00:15:21] Interesting.

[00:15:21] Mm-hmm.

[00:15:21] Yeah.

[00:15:22] You'll know it when you hear it now that I have told you to be on the lookout for it.

[00:15:26] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:15:26] All right.

[00:15:27] So summary.

[00:15:28] OK.

[00:15:28] The book of Joel is basically a prophetic mic drop filled with divine announcements about

[00:15:36] locusts and judgment.

[00:15:38] OK.

[00:15:38] His main message was the locusts are here.

[00:15:41] God is mad.

[00:15:42] You better shape up.

[00:15:43] And if you do, God will sort out your enemies.

[00:15:44] The end.

[00:15:45] I see.

[00:15:46] OK.

[00:15:46] OK.

[00:15:46] So that's what we are about today as we step into chapter one of Joel Jeff.

[00:15:55] OK.

[00:15:55] Yes.

[00:15:56] The word of the Lord that came to Joel, son of Pethul.

[00:16:00] Pethul.

[00:16:01] Pethul.

[00:16:01] Yeah.

[00:16:02] Who's very proud.

[00:16:03] Apparently.

[00:16:04] I mean.

[00:16:04] That's what I hear.

[00:16:05] That's all we know about him.

[00:16:05] Right.

[00:16:06] He's got a kid.

[00:16:06] OK.

[00:16:07] OK.

[00:16:07] Hear this, you elders.

[00:16:09] Listen, all who live in the fucking land.

[00:16:12] OK.

[00:16:12] Listen up.

[00:16:13] Has anything like this ever happened in your days or in the days of your ancestors?

[00:16:18] Pick me.

[00:16:19] The answer is yes.

[00:16:20] They have had locusts before.

[00:16:22] Right.

[00:16:22] I mean, I was assuming we were talking about locusts back in, you know, Moses.

[00:16:26] That's what I'm saying.

[00:16:27] So.

[00:16:27] Yeah.

[00:16:28] Yes.

[00:16:28] The answer to your question, Joel, is yes.

[00:16:30] Right.

[00:16:31] OK.

[00:16:31] Tell it to your children and let your children tell it to their children and their children

[00:16:35] to the next generation.

[00:16:37] Do you think that happened?

[00:16:38] I mean, we're still reading about it.

[00:16:40] So possibly.

[00:16:41] Yeah.

[00:16:42] What the locust swarm has left the great locusts have eaten.

[00:16:46] OK.

[00:16:47] Let me explain that a little bit.

[00:16:49] OK.

[00:16:49] OK.

[00:16:49] So there's different words.

[00:16:52] There's four different types of locusts described in these passages.

[00:16:56] OK.

[00:16:56] And it's thought that it's different stages of a locust from larvae, larvae, larvae through

[00:17:06] adulthood.

[00:17:08] So there's like, you know, the little ones and then the hoppers and then the munchy munches

[00:17:14] and then the mating and then the death.

[00:17:16] OK.

[00:17:16] All right.

[00:17:17] So when they say the what the locust swarm has left, the great locusts have eaten.

[00:17:23] OK.

[00:17:23] So it's different stages.

[00:17:26] Different stages of the same bug.

[00:17:28] I got it.

[00:17:29] What the great locusts have left, the young locusts have eaten.

[00:17:32] And what the young locusts have left, other locusts have eaten.

[00:17:36] OK.

[00:17:37] OK.

[00:17:37] So the locusts are eating everything.

[00:17:39] Yeah.

[00:17:39] All stages.

[00:17:40] Fuckers are eating it all.

[00:17:40] It's a swarm.

[00:17:41] There's all different stages of these things and they're all eaten.

[00:17:44] God damn locusts.

[00:17:45] Yeah.

[00:17:45] Wake up, you drunkards, and weep.

[00:17:47] Wail, all you drinkers of wine.

[00:17:49] Wail, because of the new wine for it has been snatched from your lips.

[00:17:53] Mm-hmm.

[00:17:54] So what's happening is that there ain't going to be no more wine.

[00:17:57] Right.

[00:17:57] Because the locusts ate the fucking crop.

[00:17:59] So he's like, dudes, you ain't going to have no wine.

[00:18:01] Yeah.

[00:18:02] So it behooves you to listen up.

[00:18:04] Right.

[00:18:05] OK.

[00:18:05] Yeah.

[00:18:05] See how this hits you personally?

[00:18:07] Yeah.

[00:18:08] You drinkers.

[00:18:09] You won't be able to drink anymore.

[00:18:10] Yeah.

[00:18:10] Yeah.

[00:18:11] A nation has invaded my land.

[00:18:13] And this is where the question comes.

[00:18:16] Wait.

[00:18:17] Is it a nation or a locust?

[00:18:18] Right.

[00:18:19] Like, is this a metaphor?

[00:18:20] Are the locusts a metaphor?

[00:18:22] Or was there an actual nation?

[00:18:24] Or were they both happening at the same time?

[00:18:26] Right.

[00:18:26] Right.

[00:18:27] Nobody knows.

[00:18:27] Sure.

[00:18:28] A nation has invaded my land, a mighty army without number.

[00:18:32] It has the teeth of a lion, the fangs of a lioness.

[00:18:36] It has laid waste my vines and ruined my fig trees.

[00:18:40] It has stripped off their bark and thrown it away, leaving their branches white.

[00:18:45] Hmm.

[00:18:46] Worn like a virgin in sackcloth, grieving for the betrothed of her youth.

[00:18:52] Grain offerings and drink offerings are cut off from the house of the Lord.

[00:18:57] The priests are in mourning those who minister before the Lord.

[00:19:01] That sounds more like, I mean, okay, look, I know you said nation.

[00:19:05] Mm-hmm.

[00:19:05] But he's mentioning drink a lot and he's mentioning drunkards a lot and he's mentioning locusts a lot, right?

[00:19:11] Mm-hmm.

[00:19:11] So it feels more like a comment on the state of agriculture more than it does about the state of God.

[00:19:19] Right.

[00:19:20] And punishment.

[00:19:20] Yeah.

[00:19:21] But it's just worded in that old style God speak type stuff.

[00:19:25] We're going to get to that, though.

[00:19:26] Okay.

[00:19:27] So right now he's telling us about the locusts.

[00:19:29] This is what God is pissed about here.

[00:19:31] Let me tell you about these here locusts.

[00:19:32] Sure.

[00:19:32] But I mean, everything that went bad back then was because God deemed it so or whatever.

[00:19:37] Right.

[00:19:37] But he is going to start talking more God stuff.

[00:19:39] Okay.

[00:19:39] Okay.

[00:19:39] We're just not there yet.

[00:19:40] Yeah.

[00:19:41] The fields are ruined.

[00:19:42] The ground is dried up.

[00:19:44] The grain is destroyed.

[00:19:45] The new wine is dried up.

[00:19:47] The olive oil fails.

[00:19:49] You know, how many different ways can I say the locusts are out there eating all the shit?

[00:19:54] Right.

[00:19:55] Okay.

[00:19:56] Despair, you farmers.

[00:19:57] Wail, you wine growers.

[00:19:59] Oh, sorry.

[00:20:00] Vine growers.

[00:20:01] Vine.

[00:20:02] Grieve for the wheat and the barley because the harvest of the field is destroyed.

[00:20:07] The vine is dried up and the fig tree is withered.

[00:20:11] The pomegranate.

[00:20:12] Not the pomegranate.

[00:20:14] Man.

[00:20:14] The palm and the apple tree.

[00:20:16] All the trees of the field are dried up.

[00:20:19] And the green grass doesn't grow all around and around.

[00:20:21] It doesn't.

[00:20:21] I'm so sad about the pomegranate.

[00:20:23] Because the locusts ate it.

[00:20:24] Yeah.

[00:20:24] Yeah.

[00:20:25] Surely the people's joy has withered away.

[00:20:27] Don't call me Shirley.

[00:20:29] Put on sackcloth, you priests, and mourn.

[00:20:32] Mm-hmm.

[00:20:33] Whale.

[00:20:34] Whar, whar, whar, whar, whar.

[00:20:36] I'm whaling.

[00:20:36] Your wife is headbanging.

[00:20:37] I was whaling.

[00:20:38] Yeah.

[00:20:38] You know?

[00:20:39] Okay.

[00:20:39] You who minister before the altar.

[00:20:42] Come, spend the night in sackcloth, you who minister before my God.

[00:20:46] For the grain offerings and drink offerings are withheld from the house of your God.

[00:20:51] I feel like this guy is really going to miss his wine.

[00:20:55] Well...

[00:20:55] He seems to very much care about the wine crop.

[00:20:57] He does, but it's not just for the drinking, though.

[00:21:00] Like, what he was just talking about was the offerings.

[00:21:03] Right.

[00:21:03] We can't even give our offerings to God.

[00:21:06] Sure.

[00:21:07] Sure.

[00:21:07] Like, he's saying that it's going to suck for you personally because you can't drink, but

[00:21:12] it's even going to suck more because, or it should bother you more, that on top of

[00:21:17] not being able to drink...

[00:21:19] We won't be able to worship God correctly.

[00:21:20] Yeah.

[00:21:21] Yeah.

[00:21:21] Yeah.

[00:21:21] Okay.

[00:21:22] So, he's trying to, like, hit them where it hurts and then hit them where it should hurt.

[00:21:26] But what's interesting, though, is that he's saying that we aren't going to be able to

[00:21:29] do these things.

[00:21:29] He's not, right now at least, he's not bringing up their past grievances that caused this yet.

[00:21:36] Yet.

[00:21:36] But he will.

[00:21:37] Okay.

[00:21:38] Okay.

[00:21:39] Declare a holy fast.

[00:21:41] Call a sacred assembly.

[00:21:42] This shit's an emergency, y'all.

[00:21:44] Yeah.

[00:21:44] Okay?

[00:21:45] Summon the elders and all who live in the land to the house of the Lord your God and cry out

[00:21:51] to the Lord.

[00:21:52] Alas, for that day, for the day of the Lord is near.

[00:21:56] The day of the Lord.

[00:21:57] Yeah.

[00:21:58] It will come like destruction from the Almighty.

[00:22:00] The end is nigh.

[00:22:02] Yeah.

[00:22:02] Yeah.

[00:22:02] The end is motherfucking nigh.

[00:22:04] Right.

[00:22:04] Right.

[00:22:05] That's what they wrote on the walls of the church in the movie 28 Days Later.

[00:22:10] Yeah.

[00:22:10] The end is fucking nigh.

[00:22:13] And I was like, ooh, the first time I saw that movie and he walked into that church and

[00:22:18] there was all those dead people and I was like, get out.

[00:22:20] Yeah.

[00:22:21] Like, no.

[00:22:22] I know he didn't know yet that there were zombies.

[00:22:25] Right.

[00:22:26] But do not go into a building.

[00:22:29] Where there's a lot of dead people.

[00:22:30] Where there's a lot of dead people.

[00:22:31] Yeah.

[00:22:32] You see dead people, you get out.

[00:22:34] Right.

[00:22:34] I'm sorry.

[00:22:35] Yeah.

[00:22:35] That's just a given.

[00:22:37] Because there might be zombies.

[00:22:39] Sure.

[00:22:39] Sure.

[00:22:39] I've seen too many movies.

[00:22:41] But let me just ask you this, though.

[00:22:43] You walk into a building and there's a bunch of dead bodies.

[00:22:47] I'm leaving.

[00:22:48] Even though it's a church.

[00:22:49] Yeah.

[00:22:49] Because church is where you might.

[00:22:50] Probably especially because it's a church.

[00:22:51] Right?

[00:22:52] Like, I mean, like, in an emergency, you might expect that a lot of people would think that

[00:22:59] they would find safety in a church.

[00:23:01] Sure.

[00:23:01] So I don't begrudge the dude for going there.

[00:23:04] Right.

[00:23:05] Okay.

[00:23:05] But once he walked in and he saw all those dead people, and my God, it must have stunk

[00:23:11] to high heaven.

[00:23:12] Right.

[00:23:12] And he saw in blood that it was written, the end is fucking nigh.

[00:23:17] Yeah.

[00:23:18] You leave.

[00:23:18] I'm out.

[00:23:19] I'm done.

[00:23:19] Yeah.

[00:23:20] Yeah.

[00:23:20] Sorry.

[00:23:21] No.

[00:23:21] Okay.

[00:23:22] Has not the food been cut off before our very eyes?

[00:23:26] Joy and gladness from the house of our God?

[00:23:29] I mean, apparently.

[00:23:30] Yeah.

[00:23:30] Sure.

[00:23:31] It has.

[00:23:31] Sure.

[00:23:31] Sure.

[00:23:32] Sure.

[00:23:32] The seeds are shriveled beneath the clods.

[00:23:35] The storehouses are in ruins.

[00:23:37] The granaries have been broken down for the grain has dried up.

[00:23:41] No.

[00:23:42] It is.

[00:23:42] It's gone.

[00:23:43] Okay.

[00:23:43] All right.

[00:23:43] Ah.

[00:23:44] How the cattle moan.

[00:23:47] They moan.

[00:23:48] Did you hear them?

[00:23:48] Yeah.

[00:23:49] Well, I mean, their food's gone.

[00:23:50] Yeah.

[00:23:50] So.

[00:23:51] The herds mill about because they have no pasture.

[00:23:54] Even the flocks of sheep are suffering.

[00:23:56] Bah.

[00:23:57] Yeah.

[00:23:58] To you, Lord, I call for fire has devoured the pastures in the wilderness and flames

[00:24:03] have burned up all the trees of the field.

[00:24:05] And that's because of the drought.

[00:24:07] Yeah.

[00:24:08] Right.

[00:24:08] Okay.

[00:24:09] Even the wild animals pant for you.

[00:24:13] The streams of water have dried up and fire has devoured the pastures in the wilderness.

[00:24:18] The end.

[00:24:18] Okay.

[00:24:19] All right.

[00:24:20] Yeah.

[00:24:20] So that's pretty dramatic.

[00:24:21] First chapter, right?

[00:24:22] Right.

[00:24:22] But so I do want to mention that throughout this entire chapter, there was no past grievances

[00:24:29] brought up.

[00:24:30] No.

[00:24:30] Right?

[00:24:31] No.

[00:24:31] Okay.

[00:24:32] But when you read the intro to this book, you said that the only one that they really

[00:24:37] like a lot of people think that the only book that might have really been written

[00:24:40] by Joel was this one.

[00:24:41] Mm-hmm.

[00:24:41] And this seems more like a comment on what is happening currently.

[00:24:45] Right.

[00:24:46] Like, he didn't really say God's out to get us.

[00:24:48] Right.

[00:24:48] He's just like, dudes, hey, there's a fucking locust and a drought and-

[00:24:53] Woe is us.

[00:24:54] It sucks.

[00:24:55] Yeah.

[00:24:56] We should probably ask God for help and stuff.

[00:24:58] Right.

[00:24:58] Like, hey, let's get on this, guys.

[00:24:59] I want some fucking wine.

[00:25:00] We need wine for offerings at the very least.

[00:25:02] Right.

[00:25:02] Right?

[00:25:03] Yeah.

[00:25:03] So this is what Joel wrote.

[00:25:05] He wrote, this is more based on how they saw things back then.

[00:25:09] Yeah.

[00:25:09] I feel still.

[00:25:10] Mm-hmm.

[00:25:11] Like, this is just an agricultural comment.

[00:25:13] Yeah.

[00:25:13] Right?

[00:25:13] The locusts fucking suck.

[00:25:15] God needs to help us get beyond this.

[00:25:17] And we don't even have anything to give them.

[00:25:18] We're all fucked.

[00:25:19] Yeah.

[00:25:19] You know, that's kind of how this feels.

[00:25:21] Mm-hmm.

[00:25:21] It doesn't feel like your normal prophet.

[00:25:24] Right.

[00:25:24] This just feels like a comment.

[00:25:26] It's almost like we found, like, we, quote unquote, modern history, you know, starting

[00:25:34] in, like, what, the 1700s with the Enlightenment?

[00:25:37] Sure.

[00:25:37] Sure.

[00:25:37] Found, like, a diary.

[00:25:40] Yeah.

[00:25:41] You know?

[00:25:42] Yeah, that's what it felt like a little bit.

[00:25:43] And they were like, this dates back to around that time period based on the paper and where

[00:25:48] we found it.

[00:25:48] Let's staple that into the Bible.

[00:25:50] Right.

[00:25:51] Right.

[00:25:51] And it is a good intro into what could be more apocalyptic, right?

[00:25:56] Mm-hmm.

[00:25:56] And the Bible eventually ended up being very apocalyptic.

[00:25:59] Right.

[00:25:59] And much of that was added on to after the fact at some points during, you know, the Babylonian

[00:26:05] exiles and different places where they were in dire straits, right?

[00:26:09] Mm-hmm.

[00:26:09] So someone probably knew this story or found this story, and they're like, hey, this makes

[00:26:14] a perfect intro into, like, a metaphor for this disaster, that disaster, whatever.

[00:26:19] The day of the Lord.

[00:26:20] Let's write a couple extra chapters, huh?

[00:26:22] Yeah.

[00:26:22] And make this a thing.

[00:26:23] And then later on, a bunch of screen room writers were like, day of the Lord, what if

[00:26:29] we wrote the day of the doctor?

[00:26:34] And that's how it all went.

[00:26:35] You think that's how that happened?

[00:26:36] Yeah.

[00:26:36] Exactly.

[00:26:37] One led to the other.

[00:26:38] Yep.

[00:26:39] Thank you, God, for the day of the doctor.

[00:26:42] The end.

[00:26:43] And I do want to say this, too.

[00:26:45] Like, I was actually having a conversation with a cousin of mine about religion and how,

[00:26:51] you know, he didn't know, or he knows so much about current literature and the ideas

[00:26:59] that kind of make their way through the threads of literature.

[00:27:02] And it helped him tremendously in college and different places because he understood those

[00:27:08] references because he did grow up religious.

[00:27:10] He's no longer religious, but he grew up religious and understood those threads, right?

[00:27:15] I am learning a lot of things as we go through the Bible that I didn't fully understand reading

[00:27:20] them or just like in general concept of seeing society talk about certain things.

[00:27:26] I didn't understand where these themes were coming from.

[00:27:29] Right.

[00:27:29] So it's interesting kind of learning these things as we go along.

[00:27:32] But yeah, I actually have a completely off topic, but kind of somewhat related in analogy.

[00:27:41] Like it reminded me of this.

[00:27:44] So I've been listening to this podcast called Rachel Maddow presents Ultra.

[00:27:50] Okay.

[00:27:51] And it's this story of all of this.

[00:27:57] If you took out the names and dates and just left it blank, I swear to God, it sounds like

[00:28:03] stuff that's happening today.

[00:28:05] Yeah.

[00:28:06] And it's about an early Nazi movement who had infiltrated our government, was using taxpayer

[00:28:15] dollars to send out Nazi propaganda to Americans.

[00:28:20] And it was like just condoned like by so many of the people in the Senate and Congress and like a lot of people knew about it.

[00:28:33] Yeah.

[00:28:33] And I highly recommend giving this a listen because it will shock you that these things like they're not taught in history class, that this has happened before.

[00:28:47] You know what I mean?

[00:28:47] Well, I mean, there was the guy that is known as the Lindenburg baby.

[00:28:51] But Charles Lindenburg was actually a Lindenburg.

[00:28:56] I'm sorry.

[00:28:56] I'm sorry.

[00:28:57] He was actually he ran for president, I believe.

[00:29:00] And he was a very big supporter of the Nazi Party, essentially.

[00:29:05] Like and he was part of that whole movement of, you know, propaganda that was going on back then when Hitler was coming to power and all that.

[00:29:14] And before, you know, there was there was a time in history where we hadn't picked a side.

[00:29:19] Yeah.

[00:29:19] We didn't know which way which way the political wind was going to go.

[00:29:22] It just astounds me that that is not something, you know, unless you're interested in learning about history or you listen to a program that tells you about it.

[00:29:34] Those who don't know are doomed to repeat history.

[00:29:36] You know, we're doomed to repeat it.

[00:29:37] And if you don't study, if you don't learn, if you don't understand what you came from, you are doomed to repeat it.

[00:29:43] It just like it shocked and appalled me because I had no idea, like to think that, oh, my God, there's Nazis walking around America right now.

[00:29:53] That's crazy.

[00:29:55] That's never happened before.

[00:29:56] And it's like, oh, no, actually.

[00:29:59] Yeah.

[00:29:59] Actually, they were in government before.

[00:30:04] Right.

[00:30:04] And quite happily so.

[00:30:06] Yeah.

[00:30:07] So it was it was it was a quite a quite a time.

[00:30:10] So that analogy, though, the, you know, attributing something something different to history, like us reading about this guy's diary and not knowing who wrote it or why or when or whatever.

[00:30:30] And, you know, dude was probably just recording his history of what was happening at the time.

[00:30:35] And then somebody else picked it up and added shit to it.

[00:30:38] Sure.

[00:30:38] And made it into a doomsday thing.

[00:30:41] Yeah.

[00:30:41] And I don't know.

[00:30:42] It just reminded me of that whole thing.

[00:30:43] I guess it's not really related at all.

[00:30:45] No, that's right.

[00:30:45] We go off the rails all the time.

[00:30:47] So.

[00:30:47] Yeah.

[00:30:48] Well, whatever.

[00:30:48] I highly recommend it's a very well scripted.

[00:30:52] So it's not like her just like.

[00:30:55] It's not like us.

[00:30:55] No, no.

[00:30:56] No.

[00:30:56] And it's not like her news where she's like sits behind the desk.

[00:31:01] Sure.

[00:31:01] Like she kind of is off the cuff a bit there.

[00:31:04] And that can be annoying to many people.

[00:31:05] Sure.

[00:31:06] So I'm just saying it's a very well scripted, very well told story.

[00:31:12] And I highly recommend it.

[00:31:14] Yep.

[00:31:15] But that's it for Jeff.

[00:31:17] OK.

[00:31:17] Joel.

[00:31:18] Jeff.

[00:31:18] Jolly Jeff.

[00:31:19] Yeah.

[00:31:20] Anyway, that was Joel chapter one.

[00:31:22] Sure as fuck was.

[00:31:23] Which means that we'll be back tomorrow with.

[00:31:26] Joel chapter two.

[00:31:27] All right.

[00:31:27] We'll see you then.

[00:31:28] Bye.

[00:31:35] Wife.

[00:31:35] Do you know where we are and how the hell we got here?

[00:31:39] Locusts.

[00:31:40] Yeah.

[00:31:41] We're in a.

[00:31:43] Like I literally didn't know how to follow that up.

[00:31:45] No, I know.

[00:31:46] It was just so great.

[00:31:47] Yeah.

[00:31:47] Locusts.

[00:31:49] No, we just started a new book and it's the book of Joel.

[00:31:52] Jeff.

[00:31:52] Joel.

[00:31:53] Yeah.

[00:31:54] And we are.

[00:31:55] We just finished chapter one yesterday.

[00:31:57] Sure as fuck did.

[00:31:58] And we had.

[00:31:59] So it's a minor prophet and it's a short book.

[00:32:03] He is minor.

[00:32:04] Right.

[00:32:04] And we learned a little bit about, you know, where and who and everything about writing

[00:32:09] it.

[00:32:09] And it might not be all Joel.

[00:32:11] And the first chapter was mostly just like a report on how much the locusts suck.

[00:32:15] Yeah.

[00:32:16] And that they're not going to have wine.

[00:32:17] Yeah.

[00:32:18] And that is a tragedy.

[00:32:19] I can tell you.

[00:32:20] You know.

[00:32:24] So that was a Joel chapter one.

[00:32:26] Sure as fuck was.

[00:32:27] Which means that today we're getting into.

[00:32:29] Jeff chapter two.

[00:32:30] Joel chapter two.

[00:32:32] Let's do this.

[00:32:33] Okie dokie.

[00:32:39] All right.

[00:32:39] Here we are.

[00:32:40] Hopping into chapter two.

[00:32:42] Yeah.

[00:32:43] Of Jeff.

[00:32:44] Joel.

[00:32:44] Jeff.

[00:32:45] Jeff.

[00:32:46] Joel.

[00:32:46] Blow the trumpet in Zion.

[00:32:49] Blow that shit.

[00:32:50] I'll blow something.

[00:32:51] Listen.

[00:32:52] Sound the alarm on my holy hill.

[00:32:54] See now.

[00:32:55] This sounds different already.

[00:32:57] Mm hmm.

[00:32:57] I'm just.

[00:32:58] No.

[00:32:59] I know.

[00:32:59] I agree.

[00:32:59] This already has a different tone.

[00:33:01] Yep.

[00:33:01] He's like.

[00:33:02] Because we've heard.

[00:33:03] I.

[00:33:04] We've gone through multiple prophets where there's like sound the alarm.

[00:33:07] Blow the trumpets.

[00:33:09] And.

[00:33:09] Yeah.

[00:33:09] You know.

[00:33:10] This is.

[00:33:10] This is different.

[00:33:11] This is a different.

[00:33:12] Whatever.

[00:33:13] Yep.

[00:33:13] The last one was just fucking locusts.

[00:33:15] Okay.

[00:33:16] Anyway.

[00:33:17] Let all who live in the land tremble for the day of the Lord is coming.

[00:33:21] Is it?

[00:33:22] The second time we've heard it.

[00:33:23] Yeah.

[00:33:23] Yeah.

[00:33:23] It is close at hand.

[00:33:25] A day of darkness and gloom.

[00:33:27] Some might even say nigh.

[00:33:29] I'm just.

[00:33:29] A day of clouds and blackness.

[00:33:32] Yeah.

[00:33:32] Like dawn spreading across the mountains.

[00:33:35] A large and mighty army comes.

[00:33:38] Such as never was in ancient times.

[00:33:40] Nor ever will be in ages to come.

[00:33:43] You know it's funny they say never before in ancient times.

[00:33:46] But like they're in ancient times now.

[00:33:48] Right.

[00:33:48] Isn't it funny?

[00:33:49] And also.

[00:33:49] You know the way it's all about perspective here.

[00:33:51] Also they.

[00:33:52] It's like they didn't know anything about Moses's people.

[00:33:55] Right.

[00:33:55] Because those things did happen in ancient times.

[00:33:58] You're talking about the locusts and stuff.

[00:34:00] The locusts.

[00:34:01] The armies.

[00:34:02] Egypt.

[00:34:02] They were slaves.

[00:34:04] Right.

[00:34:04] Right.

[00:34:04] Right.

[00:34:05] I mean there wasn't.

[00:34:05] Look they were the ones trying to get into the promised land.

[00:34:09] Right.

[00:34:09] So like they were the ones kind of starting the fights back then.

[00:34:12] Right.

[00:34:13] They were also trying to get out of Egypt.

[00:34:16] Right.

[00:34:16] Right.

[00:34:17] They did some fighting.

[00:34:19] They did some.

[00:34:20] But they caused it.

[00:34:21] They weren't the.

[00:34:22] They were.

[00:34:22] They were the invading force.

[00:34:24] Not coming out of Egypt.

[00:34:26] What?

[00:34:27] Trying to get out of Egypt.

[00:34:28] They didn't invade Egypt.

[00:34:30] No.

[00:34:30] They invaded the promised land.

[00:34:31] You remember how they took over the promised land?

[00:34:33] Yes.

[00:34:33] I'm not there yet.

[00:34:33] I'm talking about when they were first leaving Egypt.

[00:34:35] They were like.

[00:34:36] Pharaoh.

[00:34:37] Let my fucking people go.

[00:34:39] That's before they got to.

[00:34:40] But that wasn't war.

[00:34:41] That was just them leaving Egypt.

[00:34:43] Oh my God.

[00:34:43] Okay.

[00:34:43] But he's saying.

[00:34:45] This guy.

[00:34:45] Joe.

[00:34:46] Jeff.

[00:34:47] Joel.

[00:34:47] Joel.

[00:34:48] Is saying.

[00:34:49] Shit like this never happened before.

[00:34:52] And I'm like.

[00:34:52] But it did though.

[00:34:54] But they were talking about invading armies.

[00:34:55] Oh my God.

[00:34:56] Like the locusts.

[00:34:57] Right.

[00:34:58] But what.

[00:34:58] That's what I'm saying.

[00:35:00] They weren't.

[00:35:01] There was no invading army during that time.

[00:35:03] They were the invading army.

[00:35:04] Okay.

[00:35:05] That's all I'm saying.

[00:35:06] And I'm just saying that there were locusts.

[00:35:08] There were locusts.

[00:35:10] There were.

[00:35:10] Locusts.

[00:35:11] Is locust plural?

[00:35:12] Or is it locusts?

[00:35:14] Locust.

[00:35:15] Locust.

[00:35:15] Locusti.

[00:35:17] Locusti.

[00:35:18] Locusti.

[00:35:19] Um.

[00:35:20] Yeah.

[00:35:20] I don't know.

[00:35:20] Look.

[00:35:21] Lookity look look.

[00:35:22] Before them fire devours.

[00:35:24] Behind them a flame blazes.

[00:35:27] Before them the land is like the garden of Eden.

[00:35:30] Wait.

[00:35:31] I thought it was on fire a second ago.

[00:35:32] Behind them a desert waste.

[00:35:34] Nothing escapes them.

[00:35:35] How is it on fire if it's just a desert waste?

[00:35:38] No.

[00:35:38] He's saying like dawn spreading over the mountains.

[00:35:42] Yeah.

[00:35:42] A large mighty army comes.

[00:35:44] Okay.

[00:35:45] Yeah.

[00:35:45] And then he's like before them fire devours.

[00:35:49] Okay.

[00:35:49] Behind them a flame blazes.

[00:35:51] Right.

[00:35:51] Before them the land is like the garden of Eden.

[00:35:54] Behind them a desert waste.

[00:35:56] Nothing escapes them.

[00:35:57] Sure.

[00:35:57] No.

[00:35:57] I get it.

[00:35:58] But they just.

[00:35:59] Okay.

[00:36:00] It's just analogy.

[00:36:01] All right.

[00:36:02] That's all.

[00:36:03] All right.

[00:36:03] They have the appearance of horses.

[00:36:05] They gallop like cavalry.

[00:36:08] Okay.

[00:36:09] Are we still talking about bugs?

[00:36:10] I think.

[00:36:11] I think we're supposed to be questioning that in our minds.

[00:36:13] Right.

[00:36:13] Like are we talking about.

[00:36:15] Or you know these stories that they use with metaphors for anything.

[00:36:19] Mm-hmm.

[00:36:20] You can take them and be like well this applies to that.

[00:36:23] Right.

[00:36:24] So it's a very generalized way of just letting your religious speak speak for whatever the

[00:36:30] fuck you want it to speak for.

[00:36:31] So what do you think?

[00:36:32] Do you think that they're talking about bugs?

[00:36:34] I think we were talking about bugs in chapter one.

[00:36:37] And now we're talking about metaphorical whatever.

[00:36:40] And this feels a little bit more metaphorical.

[00:36:41] Yeah.

[00:36:42] Yeah.

[00:36:42] So.

[00:36:43] With a noise like that of chariots, they leap over the mountaintops like a crackling fire

[00:36:49] consuming stubble.

[00:36:50] I heard the cow jumped over the moon once.

[00:36:53] And the dish ran away with the spoon.

[00:36:55] Yeah.

[00:36:55] Yeah.

[00:36:55] Like a mighty army drawn up for battle.

[00:36:58] At the sight of them, nations are in anguish.

[00:37:02] Every face turns pale.

[00:37:03] Oh, man.

[00:37:05] They charge like warriors.

[00:37:06] They scale walls like soldiers.

[00:37:09] Okay.

[00:37:10] So they aren't soldiers, but they scale walls like soldiers.

[00:37:13] Do soldiers scale walls?

[00:37:16] However a soldier scales a wall.

[00:37:18] You remember it was Samuel, I think, and they had to walk around the outside of the town

[00:37:22] because there was a wall.

[00:37:23] Around the outside.

[00:37:23] They weren't scaling it.

[00:37:25] Around the outside.

[00:37:25] They blew their horns like, what was it, seven times or something like that?

[00:37:28] And then the walls of Jericho fell.

[00:37:30] You're thinking of Joshua.

[00:37:32] Joshua.

[00:37:33] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:37:34] Sorry.

[00:37:34] Joshua fought the battle with Jericho.

[00:37:36] My bad.

[00:37:36] My bad.

[00:37:36] Joshua.

[00:37:37] But yeah.

[00:37:38] But they were outside the city.

[00:37:40] They weren't scaling.

[00:37:40] The soldiers were not scaling that wall.

[00:37:42] They were not.

[00:37:43] They were blowing horns.

[00:37:43] It was a good wall, though.

[00:37:45] They were blowing horns to knock the wall down.

[00:37:47] That was a good wall.

[00:37:48] These may not be good.

[00:37:49] These are not great walls?

[00:37:50] They're not great walls.

[00:37:51] Okay.

[00:37:51] They're minor walls.

[00:37:53] For the minor prophets?

[00:37:55] Yeah.

[00:37:56] Okay.

[00:37:57] They all march in a line, not swerving from their course.

[00:38:01] Like ants?

[00:38:02] They do not jostle each other.

[00:38:05] Each marches straight ahead.

[00:38:06] No jostling.

[00:38:07] No jostling.

[00:38:08] But definitely commingling.

[00:38:10] They plunge through defenses without breaking ranks.

[00:38:14] They rush upon the city.

[00:38:16] They run along the wall.

[00:38:18] Okay.

[00:38:19] Okay.

[00:38:19] Oh, damn.

[00:38:20] That's some bugs.

[00:38:20] They scale it and they run along it.

[00:38:22] It's bugs.

[00:38:23] It's bugs?

[00:38:24] It's bugs.

[00:38:24] Okay.

[00:38:25] They climb into the houses.

[00:38:26] What?

[00:38:27] It's bugs.

[00:38:28] Like thieves, they enter through the windows.

[00:38:31] Before them, the earth shakes.

[00:38:33] The heavens tremble.

[00:38:34] The sun and moon are darkened.

[00:38:36] And the stars no longer shine.

[00:38:38] Wow.

[00:38:40] I will catch a grenade for you.

[00:38:43] I'm not sure where that came from or why.

[00:38:45] I don't know.

[00:38:46] I just was thinking that fit.

[00:38:49] Did it?

[00:38:50] Because army and...

[00:38:51] Oh, you made a large leap somewhere else.

[00:38:54] No, my brain did.

[00:38:55] I didn't actively do that.

[00:38:57] Okay.

[00:38:57] It just happened.

[00:38:58] Got it.

[00:38:59] Like sometimes people just fart.

[00:39:01] My brain sometimes just makes a connection that isn't there.

[00:39:05] Sure.

[00:39:06] Yeah.

[00:39:06] And Bruno Mars needed to say a thing.

[00:39:09] Okay.

[00:39:10] You're welcome, Bruno.

[00:39:11] Yeah.

[00:39:11] Yeah.

[00:39:12] The Lord thunders at the head of his army.

[00:39:14] His forces are beyond number and mighty as the army that obeys his command.

[00:39:19] The day of the Lord is great.

[00:39:21] There's the third time.

[00:39:22] Yeah.

[00:39:22] It is dreadful.

[00:39:23] We're definitely talking about an army that is in numbers like bugs is what we're talking

[00:39:28] about.

[00:39:28] Yeah.

[00:39:28] I think.

[00:39:29] Yeah.

[00:39:29] It's an army like bugs, not bugs like an army.

[00:39:32] Because this is God's.

[00:39:33] God's bringing the army.

[00:39:35] Yeah.

[00:39:35] Right?

[00:39:36] And so obviously God's not going to bring just like a small piddly army.

[00:39:39] He's going to bring like locust type army.

[00:39:41] That climbs over walls and dances along the edge.

[00:39:44] Yeah.

[00:39:45] And they leap into people's houses through the window.

[00:39:48] That's kind of creepy.

[00:39:49] Yeah.

[00:39:50] Like if you think about it.

[00:39:51] Well, it's, you know, you're supposed to.

[00:39:53] The whole point of religion is to be scared of something.

[00:39:56] Right?

[00:39:56] I'm a feared.

[00:39:57] Yeah.

[00:39:58] Yeah.

[00:39:58] So, I mean, if you're not scared, they're not telling the story.

[00:40:01] Right.

[00:40:01] Okay.

[00:40:01] Well, this one's kind of creepy.

[00:40:02] Don't like it.

[00:40:03] Yeah.

[00:40:03] The day of the Lord is great.

[00:40:05] It is dreadful.

[00:40:06] Who can endure it?

[00:40:08] Somebody did.

[00:40:09] We're still here.

[00:40:10] Somebody said.

[00:40:10] Yeah.

[00:40:11] Oh, now God's going to talk to us.

[00:40:13] Okay.

[00:40:13] Whoa.

[00:40:14] That escalated quickly.

[00:40:15] Right?

[00:40:15] Right.

[00:40:16] Unless, you know, unless this hasn't happened yet.

[00:40:18] We don't know when this happened or is going to happen.

[00:40:21] Right?

[00:40:22] Well.

[00:40:22] So, I guess it could still happen.

[00:40:24] I don't know.

[00:40:25] Possibly.

[00:40:25] Let's see.

[00:40:26] Yeah.

[00:40:26] Sure.

[00:40:26] Even now, declares the Lord, return to me with all your heart, with fasting and weeping

[00:40:32] and mourning.

[00:40:34] Okay.

[00:40:34] So, I'm going to probably kill you all with like swarms of just locust type.

[00:40:41] Either bugs or people that are like bugs.

[00:40:44] Right.

[00:40:44] And I do want to reiterate this.

[00:40:48] I think we covered in, actually, I think it was in the last book, they referred to the

[00:40:54] Assyrians as locusts at one point.

[00:40:55] Oh, they did.

[00:40:56] Yeah.

[00:40:56] Right.

[00:40:57] Yeah.

[00:40:57] So, I'm just, you know, if I had to attribute a time frame on it, I would put it in like

[00:41:02] the same time frames as Joel and stuff.

[00:41:04] Right.

[00:41:05] Yeah.

[00:41:05] But, again, we don't know.

[00:41:06] But they didn't mention the Assyrians, remember?

[00:41:09] Right.

[00:41:09] And Joel.

[00:41:09] Joel.

[00:41:10] No, I know.

[00:41:11] Yeah.

[00:41:11] So, I don't know.

[00:41:12] I'm just saying.

[00:41:13] Yeah.

[00:41:13] Rend your heart and not your garments.

[00:41:16] Oh, that's a good line.

[00:41:17] Yeah.

[00:41:18] Like, don't worry about your fucking garment.

[00:41:20] It's your heart that you need to get right.

[00:41:22] Yeah.

[00:41:22] Tear up into shape.

[00:41:24] Yeah.

[00:41:24] I always wondered why they were tearing their clothes off and shit.

[00:41:26] Yeah.

[00:41:26] Nobody gives a shit about your fucking robe.

[00:41:28] You just ruined.

[00:41:29] That's a waste of money, man.

[00:41:30] Right?

[00:41:31] Like, how common are gowns back then?

[00:41:35] Right.

[00:41:35] You'd think that would be more, you know, like, because you have to hand make everything.

[00:41:39] I guess that was the meaningfulness of it.

[00:41:41] That's true.

[00:41:41] That's true.

[00:41:42] Like, I cannot afford another.

[00:41:44] This is so bad.

[00:41:45] I'm going to tear up my only shirt thing.

[00:41:49] Yeah.

[00:41:49] Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding

[00:41:57] in love, and he relents from sending calamity.

[00:42:00] Does he, though?

[00:42:02] No.

[00:42:02] Who knows?

[00:42:03] He may turn and relent and leave behind a blessing.

[00:42:06] Green offerings and drink offerings for the Lord your God.

[00:42:10] Probably not, though.

[00:42:12] Yeah.

[00:42:12] I'm just saying.

[00:42:13] I don't recall that ever happening so far.

[00:42:15] Blow the trumpet in Zion.

[00:42:17] Burn, burn, burn, burn, burn.

[00:42:19] Declare a holy fast.

[00:42:21] Call a sacred assembly.

[00:42:22] Gather the people.

[00:42:23] Consecrate the assembly.

[00:42:25] Bring together the elders.

[00:42:26] Gather the children.

[00:42:27] Those nursing at the breast.

[00:42:29] Let the bridegroom leave his room and the bride her chamber.

[00:42:34] Let the priests who minister before the Lord weep between the portico and the altar.

[00:42:39] Let them say, spare your people, Lord.

[00:42:42] Do not make your inheritance an object of scorn, a byword among the nations.

[00:42:48] Why should they say among the peoples, where is our God?

[00:42:53] Well, you know, I feel like this is...

[00:42:56] So every time we run into these prophets, they're always talking about some sort of an impending

[00:43:01] doom or gloom that's happening, right?

[00:43:03] And oftentimes it's an army that's encroaching on them and they're like, we're going to get

[00:43:09] wiped out by these people.

[00:43:11] And when push comes to shove and things are going to be really shitty, people tend to turn

[00:43:19] to anything that they think can help them, right?

[00:43:22] And so, of course, we're going to have the most writings and the most, you know, things happen

[00:43:28] with regard to religion during times of strife because that's when people are the most scared.

[00:43:34] That's when they're the most fearful.

[00:43:36] And even if...

[00:43:38] Let's say you believe really hardcore that something can save you from this.

[00:43:43] You're going to put all your effort into doing that.

[00:43:45] Now, let's say you don't believe in something can save you.

[00:43:48] But you make your money from something that can save you.

[00:43:52] You're a priest or you're a prophet or whatever, right?

[00:43:55] You know that this event that's coming down the pike is going to cause people to react to

[00:44:01] what you're saying more vehemently than it would if it was just a normal everyday day where

[00:44:06] other people are going out for picnics and whatever.

[00:44:08] But fear is a motivator.

[00:44:10] Of course.

[00:44:11] Clickbait.

[00:44:11] And if you're a prophet, if you're a priest, if you're anything, that fear is an impetus to

[00:44:16] get people to start listening to you more.

[00:44:18] And that's why priests and prophets and religious leaders and news places...

[00:44:23] I was going to say, and Fox News.

[00:44:25] ...push fear so much.

[00:44:27] Because it motivates people to listen and believe and...

[00:44:31] And buy.

[00:44:31] Yeah.

[00:44:32] Spend those dollars.

[00:44:34] It's never changed with humanity.

[00:44:35] Nope.

[00:44:36] It's always been the same.

[00:44:37] Thousands of years later, we're still looking for them shekels.

[00:44:39] Yeah.

[00:44:40] And then it's...

[00:44:42] I don't like the idea of...

[00:44:46] Part of the reason I am an atheist is because I don't like the idea of living in fear from

[00:44:51] something that I don't understand.

[00:44:53] I'd rather try to understand it than to fear it.

[00:44:57] Yeah.

[00:44:58] That's who I am.

[00:44:59] Right.

[00:45:00] No, I'm the same way.

[00:45:01] Anyway.

[00:45:01] Sorry.

[00:45:02] I know I got off on a little rant there.

[00:45:04] Then...

[00:45:04] Then.

[00:45:05] The Lord was jealous for his land and took pity on his people.

[00:45:08] Oh, well, that was nice of them.

[00:45:09] That's the only time that ever happened.

[00:45:11] Right?

[00:45:11] That was...

[00:45:12] Wow.

[00:45:12] Yeah, that was easy.

[00:45:13] All right, Joel.

[00:45:14] The Lord replied to them...

[00:45:16] Whoa.

[00:45:17] To them.

[00:45:18] To them.

[00:45:18] Okay.

[00:45:19] All of them.

[00:45:19] You go, God.

[00:45:20] Wow.

[00:45:21] I'm a little impressed.

[00:45:23] I am sending you grain, new wine, and olive oil, enough to satisfy you fully.

[00:45:29] Never again will I make you an object of scorn to the nations.

[00:45:33] Damn.

[00:45:34] What's going on here?

[00:45:35] But that happened, though.

[00:45:36] He did make them...

[00:45:37] I thought we were talking like a hypothetical they were going to get.

[00:45:40] Like, is this if they hypothetically get all their people together?

[00:45:42] Maybe.

[00:45:43] Because I thought it was like, if you guys do this, then that's what he's going to do.

[00:45:47] So I feel like he's putting words in God's mouth as to what he might do.

[00:45:53] But it says the Lord was jealous for his land and took pity on his people.

[00:45:58] The Lord replied to...

[00:46:00] Past tense to them.

[00:46:01] No, I...

[00:46:02] So I'm having a hard time with this because...

[00:46:05] It's written poorly, if that's the case.

[00:46:06] Yeah.

[00:46:06] But I feel like it was...

[00:46:08] Like, I feel like we talked about an impending doom and moved into a hypothetical scenario

[00:46:14] where God fixes it if they do the thing that he says to do.

[00:46:18] And then we're just assuming that they all come together and wail and cry out to God.

[00:46:23] And when they do that, this is what God's response will be.

[00:46:26] Okay, yeah.

[00:46:26] Because at the beginning of the paragraph...

[00:46:29] Right.

[00:46:29] It was like, rend your heart, not your garments, blah, blah, blah.

[00:46:32] He's a good God.

[00:46:33] He might change his mind.

[00:46:34] And then it says, who knows?

[00:46:36] He may turn and relent and leave behind a blessing.

[00:46:39] Right.

[00:46:39] Blow the trumpet.

[00:46:40] Blah, blah, blah.

[00:46:41] We went straight from that to assuming that he did it.

[00:46:44] Yeah.

[00:46:44] Okay.

[00:46:45] We just skipped the bit where we're saying this is hypothetical.

[00:46:48] Okay.

[00:46:48] Yeah.

[00:46:49] And I'm stupid.

[00:46:50] So I'm like...

[00:46:52] Well, I mean, okay, I'm not stupid.

[00:46:54] I have a bit of the tism and I took it literally.

[00:46:57] Right.

[00:46:58] Like, wait, when did God say that?

[00:47:00] Because we know for a fact that in later times, you know, because these books are out of order.

[00:47:06] Yeah.

[00:47:07] He did not.

[00:47:08] Right, right.

[00:47:09] He, you know, it says, I'll never make you an object of scorn to the nations.

[00:47:15] And I'm like, but you do though.

[00:47:17] Yeah.

[00:47:17] You specifically do.

[00:47:19] Right.

[00:47:19] You say you will.

[00:47:20] Yeah.

[00:47:21] And then you do.

[00:47:22] Yeah.

[00:47:22] I'm so confused.

[00:47:23] Okay.

[00:47:24] I will drive...

[00:47:25] This is God still talking, but apparently it's hypothetical God, not actual.

[00:47:29] For at least it was anyway.

[00:47:31] We'll see.

[00:47:32] Yeah, sure.

[00:47:32] I will drive the northern horde far from you, pushing it into a parched and barren land.

[00:47:38] Its eastern ranks will drown in the Dead Sea and its western ranks in the Mediterranean Sea.

[00:47:45] And its stench will go up.

[00:47:48] Its smell will rise.

[00:47:50] Wow.

[00:47:50] End quote.

[00:47:51] Surely he has done great things.

[00:47:54] I mean, sure.

[00:47:54] Hypothetically.

[00:47:55] Right.

[00:47:56] Right.

[00:47:56] Do not be afraid, land of Judah.

[00:47:59] Be glad and rejoice.

[00:48:01] Surely...

[00:48:02] Just to be clear, we're being glad and rejoicing that God killed a bunch of people.

[00:48:06] But not our people.

[00:48:07] Right.

[00:48:08] But he still killed a bunch of people.

[00:48:09] But we don't care about those people.

[00:48:10] I know.

[00:48:11] I just wanted to clarify that we are rejoicing over lots of people dying.

[00:48:16] No, we're rejoicing over us not dying.

[00:48:19] I understand.

[00:48:20] Other people did die, but we don't give a fuck about them because...

[00:48:24] That's the point I was trying to get to.

[00:48:26] Yes.

[00:48:26] Yes.

[00:48:26] We don't give a fuck about them.

[00:48:28] Right.

[00:48:28] That's the point I was trying to get to.

[00:48:30] Okay.

[00:48:30] Because obviously the Bible doesn't give a fuck about them.

[00:48:33] Yeah.

[00:48:33] They're subhuman.

[00:48:35] Right.

[00:48:35] You know?

[00:48:36] I just wanted to clarify that point.

[00:48:37] Sure.

[00:48:37] We don't care about subhumans.

[00:48:39] Right.

[00:48:39] They're not, but...

[00:48:41] No.

[00:48:41] I know.

[00:48:42] I wanted to make sure...

[00:48:43] To be clear, there's no such thing as subhuman.

[00:48:45] There's either human or not.

[00:48:47] And I think a lot of people forget that.

[00:48:50] That's why I wanted to clarify.

[00:48:52] Sure, sure.

[00:48:52] Yeah.

[00:48:52] I was just playing along.

[00:48:53] Right.

[00:48:54] No, I got it.

[00:48:54] I got it.

[00:48:54] As the bad guy.

[00:48:56] As the bad guy who thinks he's the good guy.

[00:48:58] Sure.

[00:48:58] Yeah.

[00:48:59] Surely the Lord has done great things.

[00:49:01] Do not be afraid, you wild animals, for the pastures in the wilderness are becoming green.

[00:49:07] Whee!

[00:49:07] You wild animals.

[00:49:09] Like, is this like your worms?

[00:49:11] Yeah.

[00:49:11] I mean...

[00:49:11] You fucking mountain.

[00:49:12] Yeah, I don't know.

[00:49:13] Is this more of a disparaging while not disparaging?

[00:49:15] Right.

[00:49:15] Okay.

[00:49:16] He loves to neg his people.

[00:49:18] Right?

[00:49:19] The trees are bearing their fruit.

[00:49:21] The fig tree and the vineyard yield their riches.

[00:49:25] Be glad, people of Zion.

[00:49:27] Rejoice in the Lord your God, for he has given you the autumn rains because he is faithful.

[00:49:33] He sends you abundant showers, both autumn and spring rains, as before.

[00:49:38] Everything's going so well.

[00:49:40] Assuming that we're actually talking about actuality here and not hypothetical.

[00:49:45] Right.

[00:49:45] Because we never switched back from the hypothetical reality that we're in.

[00:49:50] I don't think this is God actual.

[00:49:51] I think you had it right.

[00:49:52] This is God plan.

[00:49:56] Right.

[00:49:56] Best case scenario, God.

[00:49:57] God hope.

[00:49:58] Yeah.

[00:49:58] Hope God.

[00:49:59] Yeah.

[00:49:59] Okay.

[00:50:00] The threshing floors will be filled with grain.

[00:50:03] The vats will overflow with new wine and oil.

[00:50:07] Okay.

[00:50:07] Now we're quoting again.

[00:50:08] This is hypothetical God.

[00:50:10] We're quoting hypothetical God.

[00:50:11] Yeah.

[00:50:12] Okay.

[00:50:12] I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten.

[00:50:15] The great locust and the young locust.

[00:50:18] The other locusts and the locust swarm.

[00:50:20] My great army that I sent among you.

[00:50:23] And let me just interrupt myself real quick.

[00:50:25] Because just to remind you that in the previous chapter, we discussed that there were several different kinds of locusts at different stages.

[00:50:38] Right.

[00:50:38] Right.

[00:50:38] And that they were all very munchy.

[00:50:40] Which is weird.

[00:50:41] Munchy.

[00:50:42] Because it felt like we were talking about armies in this chapter.

[00:50:46] And now.

[00:50:46] But now we've gone back to like a literal description of their larva states and stuff and everything.

[00:50:50] Yeah.

[00:50:51] Yeah.

[00:50:51] That's a weird transition.

[00:50:53] Mm-hmm.

[00:50:53] Okay.

[00:50:54] Yeah.

[00:50:54] All right.

[00:50:55] And maybe.

[00:50:56] Okay.

[00:50:56] So like I'm just going to play devil's advocate here.

[00:50:59] Right?

[00:50:59] Pat.

[00:51:00] Right.

[00:51:01] So if the person that was continuing this book.

[00:51:06] Right?

[00:51:07] Mm-hmm.

[00:51:07] Because we talked about that.

[00:51:08] That Joel probably only wrote the first chapter.

[00:51:11] Yeah.

[00:51:11] So if someone was continuing this from Joel.

[00:51:14] Mm-hmm.

[00:51:15] They probably wanted a way to link it to that first chapter.

[00:51:20] Right.

[00:51:20] So they're probably trying to go.

[00:51:21] Like they're stretching here for some sort of a tie-in.

[00:51:24] They're like army, army, army.

[00:51:25] A tie-in.

[00:51:26] I mean locusts.

[00:51:27] Right.

[00:51:28] Yeah.

[00:51:28] They're stretching for that tie-in.

[00:51:30] Yeah.

[00:51:30] And they're like.

[00:51:31] If we just reiterate that bit from when he said it.

[00:51:34] Yeah.

[00:51:34] That'll bring it all together right here.

[00:51:35] What a metaphor.

[00:51:36] Yeah.

[00:51:36] God.

[00:51:37] I'm a goddamn poet.

[00:51:38] Genius here.

[00:51:39] Right?

[00:51:39] Right?

[00:51:40] Yeah.

[00:51:40] So I'm going to give you back some shit for all the locusts that ate stuff.

[00:51:45] Yeah.

[00:51:45] You will have plenty to eat until you are full.

[00:51:47] And you will praise the name of the Lord your God who has worked wonders for you.

[00:51:52] Never again will my people be shamed.

[00:51:54] You know how often he says never again?

[00:51:57] It's like.

[00:51:57] It's countless times.

[00:51:59] Mm-hmm.

[00:51:59] And I'm like.

[00:52:01] But we keep coming back to the not never again.

[00:52:04] Yeah.

[00:52:04] So yeah.

[00:52:05] Then you will know that I am in Israel.

[00:52:09] Okay.

[00:52:09] That I am the Lord your God and that there is no other.

[00:52:13] That he is in Israel.

[00:52:14] Yeah.

[00:52:14] Now that's an interesting way to phrase it.

[00:52:16] Yeah.

[00:52:17] Because that makes me think that the northern tribes have not dispersed yet because during

[00:52:24] Kings and Chronicles it was Judah.

[00:52:26] Yeah.

[00:52:26] So this feels like it might have been written.

[00:52:28] Again.

[00:52:29] Well I said earlier in this chapter it felt more like Hosea.

[00:52:33] Yeah.

[00:52:34] Yeah.

[00:52:34] So maybe this is more Hosea time.

[00:52:36] I don't know.

[00:52:36] Like early before.

[00:52:38] Before Kings and Chronicles.

[00:52:40] Well not necessarily before Kings and Chronicles but before the northern tribes went away.

[00:52:43] Yeah.

[00:52:44] Right.

[00:52:44] Yeah.

[00:52:45] Because and the way that they're in.

[00:52:46] Then we've talked about this too.

[00:52:47] The Assyrians were described in Hosea as locusts.

[00:52:50] Right.

[00:52:51] And they keep talking about the northern you know they mentioned northern here which there

[00:52:55] was northern invaders coming in Hosea as well.

[00:52:57] Yeah.

[00:52:57] So there's a lot of like similarities there.

[00:53:01] And I mean there's no way from I haven't studied this like other than what we're just

[00:53:05] doing right now.

[00:53:05] Yeah.

[00:53:05] But the comparisons to me are all right there.

[00:53:09] Yeah.

[00:53:09] And it does feel very much in that same time frame maybe prior to Hosea because he's

[00:53:16] when they say Israel he's not breaking it apart as those shitty Israelites up there.

[00:53:21] Right.

[00:53:22] Versus the other Israel.

[00:53:22] So maybe this was slightly before Joel's time and the Israel the before Joel or before

[00:53:29] before Hosea's time.

[00:53:30] Sorry.

[00:53:31] But that would make sense because then the Assyrians would have been attacking the northern

[00:53:37] tribes before they got to.

[00:53:38] Yeah.

[00:53:39] You know Judah.

[00:53:40] So this could have been something happening a little bit before King Kings and Chronicles

[00:53:45] because.

[00:53:45] Yeah.

[00:53:45] Whatever.

[00:53:46] The Assyrians were coming down from the north from for a long time.

[00:53:50] Right.

[00:53:51] And then here we are talking about this and not knowing what time frame but it feels like

[00:53:55] that time frame.

[00:53:56] Yeah.

[00:53:56] So that 600 year window.

[00:53:59] I'm just saying.

[00:53:59] I'm just saying.

[00:54:00] Look look and we don't know when the first chapter was written.

[00:54:02] We don't know when this chapter was written.

[00:54:04] We don't know any of that stuff.

[00:54:05] But this chapter specifically to me feels like Israel was still kind of together at

[00:54:10] least.

[00:54:11] And they were probably talking about the Assyrians at some level.

[00:54:14] Right.

[00:54:14] So.

[00:54:15] Like still really in the Deuteronomistic history frame.

[00:54:20] And again this is just me taking guesses.

[00:54:22] Yeah.

[00:54:22] I'm taking my best guess here based on what I do know.

[00:54:24] Yeah.

[00:54:25] And that's all I can do.

[00:54:26] Then you will know that I am in Israel.

[00:54:28] That I am the Lord your God and that there is no other.

[00:54:31] Never again will my people be shamed.

[00:54:33] Okay.

[00:54:34] I want to take a second here and point out that the intro to this book.

[00:54:43] Yeah.

[00:54:43] That I read said that the hypothesis was that he's from Judah because there was no mention

[00:54:51] of Israel.

[00:54:52] But they just mentioned it.

[00:54:53] And yet we just mentioned it.

[00:54:54] So I have to wonder if it depends on the translation.

[00:54:58] That could very well be.

[00:54:59] And that makes me wonder further.

[00:55:03] Well that sounds like a good Q&A to dig into further.

[00:55:05] Yeah.

[00:55:05] You know like I don't know for sure.

[00:55:08] But also you know translations do get muddled between you know the different translations

[00:55:13] that we have even right available to us today.

[00:55:15] Right.

[00:55:15] It just makes me wonder where the question lies.

[00:55:21] Is it with the translation that I'm reading or is it with that intro?

[00:55:25] And it matters.

[00:55:26] It does.

[00:55:26] I mean it matters when we're trying to figure out time frames.

[00:55:29] It matters when we're trying to figure out relationship to other parts of the Bible.

[00:55:33] Right.

[00:55:34] Right.

[00:55:34] And when you and I as lay people reading the Bible are able to sit here after doing this

[00:55:40] for four years and say well this feels like it's from there.

[00:55:45] There's something to it.

[00:55:46] Right.

[00:55:46] You know like there's something there that you are able to put your finger on just by

[00:55:50] reading through this and say this if you're paying attention.

[00:55:53] Yeah.

[00:55:53] If you're reading it with the idea that you're reading about God and everything's God God

[00:55:58] God you're not going to pick these things out.

[00:56:00] Right.

[00:56:00] But if you're reading it with the idea that these were written by humans and that there

[00:56:03] are different segments that were written writing about different tragedies and and things at

[00:56:08] different times then you can start to piece those things together and say oh this sounds

[00:56:13] a bit like that.

[00:56:14] And that sounds a bit like this.

[00:56:16] Yeah.

[00:56:16] So.

[00:56:16] Yeah.

[00:56:17] I agree with you 100 percent.

[00:56:18] So that'll definitely be something that goes in our Q&A.

[00:56:21] Yeah.

[00:56:21] All right.

[00:56:22] Carrying on.

[00:56:23] Yes.

[00:56:23] Yes.

[00:56:23] Okay.

[00:56:24] And afterward I God will pour out my spirit capital S on all people.

[00:56:31] Yeah.

[00:56:31] Pour it out.

[00:56:32] He's going to come all over those people.

[00:56:33] Your sons and daughters will prophecy.

[00:56:36] Your old men will dream dreams.

[00:56:38] Wet ones.

[00:56:39] Your young men will see visions.

[00:56:41] They're going to dream a little dream for him.

[00:56:43] Yeah.

[00:56:44] Yeah.

[00:56:44] Yeah.

[00:56:44] They will.

[00:56:45] Even on my servants both men and women I will pour out my spirit in those days.

[00:56:50] Yeah.

[00:56:51] I will.

[00:56:51] Way too much fun with this.

[00:56:53] I'm sorry but it just sounds sexual.

[00:56:56] He's going to pour out his.

[00:56:57] It doesn't take much for you to see it though.

[00:57:00] No.

[00:57:00] Because I'm a child.

[00:57:01] You know I'm just saying.

[00:57:02] Right.

[00:57:03] I will show wonders in the heavens and on the earth.

[00:57:07] Yeah.

[00:57:07] You will.

[00:57:08] Blood and fire.

[00:57:09] Ew.

[00:57:10] Keep that shit to yourself.

[00:57:11] And billows of smoke.

[00:57:12] The sun will be turned to darkness and the moon to blood before the coming of the great

[00:57:18] and dreadful day of the Lord.

[00:57:21] Day of the Lord.

[00:57:22] Fourth mention.

[00:57:22] Yeah.

[00:57:22] Yeah.

[00:57:23] And everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved for on Mount Zion and in

[00:57:28] Jerusalem there will be deliverance as the Lord has said even among the survivors

[00:57:34] whom the Lord calls.

[00:57:36] The end.

[00:57:37] Okay.

[00:57:37] Okay.

[00:57:38] So if you.

[00:57:39] So assuming you live you you obviously ask for God's forgiveness and you're you're one

[00:57:44] of the saved people.

[00:57:45] But if you died you sucked.

[00:57:47] Yeah.

[00:57:47] Even if you were out there trying to defend Israel slash Judah from.

[00:57:51] Right.

[00:57:51] You know whatever this was.

[00:57:52] You always had it coming.

[00:57:54] Apparently.

[00:57:54] We've talked about that.

[00:57:55] I just I don't like that idea.

[00:57:57] Right.

[00:57:57] Like the judge that the judgment of someone after death because they must not have tried hard

[00:58:02] enough or something.

[00:58:03] Yeah.

[00:58:04] I mean.

[00:58:04] I'm like what what is that shit.

[00:58:06] That's fucking horrible.

[00:58:06] Yeah.

[00:58:07] We just literally talked about this in our special episode.

[00:58:11] I know.

[00:58:11] I just I can't stand it.

[00:58:12] I can't stand it.

[00:58:13] Anyway.

[00:58:14] Do we have anything else to cover today or was that that it was chapter two.

[00:58:20] All right.

[00:58:20] Well more locusts and then we'll probably we'll probably have more locusts I would imagine.

[00:58:25] That's what I would think.

[00:58:27] I hear there's a lot of locusts.

[00:58:28] So we're about to finish up our book.

[00:58:30] Yeah.

[00:58:31] Oh that's I shit.

[00:58:32] Yeah.

[00:58:33] This was the second to last chapter because there's only three fucking chapters.

[00:58:36] So tomorrow we'll be back with the last book of Joel which will be the last chapter

[00:58:41] of Joel chapter three.

[00:58:43] That's what I meant.

[00:58:43] Mm hmm.

[00:58:44] Um and uh and then we'll get into uh well actually we'll have our uh what's the well

[00:58:50] a special episode.

[00:58:51] Mm hmm.

[00:58:51] A Patreon only.

[00:58:52] On Wednesday at 10 p.m.

[00:58:54] Eastern on our discord.

[00:58:55] Mm hmm.

[00:58:55] And I think that is a Patreon only.

[00:58:57] That is a Patreon only.

[00:58:58] Although I don't know what we're covering yet.

[00:59:01] What we're covering yet.

[00:59:01] Right.

[00:59:02] Because we're really bad at this.

[00:59:03] Mm hmm.

[00:59:03] But uh we'll cover something and it's going to be Patreon only.

[00:59:06] So if you want to hear it and you're not a patron.

[00:59:08] Mm hmm.

[00:59:08] You should at least come over to discord.

[00:59:09] You should.

[00:59:10] And there'll be a link in the show notes.

[00:59:12] Always.

[00:59:12] Always a link in the show notes.

[00:59:13] Mm hmm.

[00:59:14] So you can find it right down there.

[00:59:16] Um even if you don't know anything about discord we're happy to have you.

[00:59:20] Plenty of people there that will help you out.

[00:59:22] I promise.

[00:59:22] And they're the ones who always help me get in because I still don't know what the fuck

[00:59:26] I'm doing.

[00:59:26] To be perfectly honest with you we're all middle-aged people have no business being on discord

[00:59:30] but we're there anyway and we're having a blast.

[00:59:33] You know what?

[00:59:33] It's so true.

[00:59:34] We're all middle-aged people who generally have no business being on the internet.

[00:59:38] Except for Breddy.

[00:59:40] And Fern.

[00:59:41] No Fern.

[00:59:41] Well I was saying we were going to middle-aged people.

[00:59:43] Oh okay.

[00:59:44] Except for Breddy.

[00:59:44] Breddy's not middle-aged and Fern is middle-aged and both of them belong on the internet because

[00:59:51] they know what the fuck they're doing.

[00:59:53] Right.

[00:59:53] Right.

[00:59:54] And we do not.

[00:59:55] I wasn't going to call you out Fern on the middle-aged thing but you know wife did so.

[00:59:58] I just assumed Fern is our age.

[01:00:00] What?

[01:00:02] And I know Breddy's a youngin.

[01:00:03] Come meet us and Fern and Breddy and everybody else that's on discord.

[01:00:07] And then uh we will see you guys tomorrow.

[01:00:10] Well no.

[01:00:11] Tomorrow will be the the special episode.

[01:00:14] Yeah.

[01:00:14] And then we'll see you uh the next day which will be Thursday.

[01:00:19] For chapter three.

[01:00:21] No it'll be Friday.

[01:00:23] I don't know what you're saying.

[01:00:24] It'll be Friday.

[01:00:24] Okay sure.

[01:00:24] Because the the special episode comes out on Thursday.

[01:00:27] Oh we record it Wednesday.

[01:00:29] It comes out Thursday.

[01:00:30] So it'll be Friday.

[01:00:30] And then uh sorry we're recording this in advance so we have to think about this.

[01:00:34] Yeah we don't really know.

[01:00:35] Yeah.

[01:00:36] Calendars.

[01:00:37] Right.

[01:00:37] Right.

[01:00:37] You know what just come along with us.

[01:00:39] We're going to do some episodes later.

[01:00:40] Yeah.

[01:00:40] Come along with us.

[01:00:41] And you should be there and you should do stuff with us.

[01:00:43] Yeah.

[01:00:43] And you should be at discord and in all the places.

[01:00:45] And just listen okay.

[01:00:46] Just listen.

[01:00:46] And we're going to get the fuck out of here before we just ramble forever because that's

[01:00:49] apparently where we're going with this.

[01:00:50] Yep.

[01:00:50] Bye.

[01:00:50] Bye.

[01:00:57] Wife.

[01:00:57] Do you know where we are and how the hell we got here?

[01:01:02] Well yesterday we just got done reading Joel chapter two.

[01:01:06] Sure as fuck did.

[01:01:07] And in that chapter uh God was uh pouring out his spirit on people.

[01:01:13] He came all over those folks.

[01:01:15] Yeah he did.

[01:01:17] I mean it was more of the judgment and then repentance crap where you know you have the

[01:01:24] ability to you know get back in God's favor if you just beg him and um yay you're saved

[01:01:30] if you don't you know worship idols and shit.

[01:01:34] Unless of course the locust gets you which might be Assyrians and who knows because it's

[01:01:37] Joel.

[01:01:38] Right.

[01:01:38] Or Jeff.

[01:01:39] We don't know.

[01:01:39] Joel, Jeff.

[01:01:42] Jeff.

[01:01:43] Anyway that was the gist of uh Joel chapter two.

[01:01:47] Okay.

[01:01:48] Which means that today we're getting into.

[01:01:51] Jughead chapter three.

[01:01:53] No no no.

[01:01:54] Joel chapter three.

[01:01:56] Which is also our uh we're doing what today?

[01:01:59] Um wrapping that shit up is done.

[01:02:01] Yeah.

[01:02:01] This is the last chapter.

[01:02:02] We're done with this book of the bible.

[01:02:03] Yeah.

[01:02:03] After today.

[01:02:04] Well I mean other than the specials.

[01:02:05] Right.

[01:02:05] Right.

[01:02:06] But we're done.

[01:02:06] Yeah.

[01:02:07] We're done.

[01:02:07] And uh if you're listening to this this morning um tonight is our special live episode on

[01:02:13] discord which you should totally check out.

[01:02:16] You're saying Wednesday when you say this morning and.

[01:02:20] Yeah because it releases at 6 a.m.

[01:02:21] I'm just making sure that I understand what day is coming out.

[01:02:25] Wednesday at 10 p.m.

[01:02:26] Eastern.

[01:02:26] Yes.

[01:02:27] Is our live.

[01:02:28] Is our live.

[01:02:29] On discord.

[01:02:29] So if you're listening to this episode the day that it comes out you'll be listening

[01:02:33] you can hop on tonight at 10 p.m.

[01:02:35] Eastern and catch the live episode on discord.

[01:02:37] Okay.

[01:02:38] Yeah.

[01:02:38] Got it.

[01:02:39] Which is Wednesday.

[01:02:40] Mm-hmm.

[01:02:40] So.

[01:02:40] Okay.

[01:02:41] Um you ready to get into this?

[01:02:43] Yes.

[01:02:43] Yes I am.

[01:02:44] All right.

[01:02:45] Let's do it.

[01:02:45] Okie dokie.

[01:02:52] All right.

[01:02:53] We're getting into chapter three of Jughead.

[01:02:55] Or Joel.

[01:02:56] Or Jeff.

[01:02:57] But Joel.

[01:02:58] And Geoff.

[01:02:59] No Joel.

[01:02:59] All right.

[01:03:00] In those days.

[01:03:01] Yes.

[01:03:06] We have one more day of the Lord coming.

[01:03:09] Do we?

[01:03:09] Remember?

[01:03:10] Because there was one and then we did three in the second chapter and now we've got one

[01:03:15] more somewhere.

[01:03:16] Oh.

[01:03:16] I think.

[01:03:17] I mean I was trying to keep count.

[01:03:18] I might have not paid attention.

[01:03:20] Sure.

[01:03:20] That happens to me.

[01:03:21] All right.

[01:03:22] Frequently.

[01:03:22] Got it.

[01:03:23] So in those days.

[01:03:25] Yes.

[01:03:25] And also.

[01:03:27] And also.

[01:03:27] At that time.

[01:03:28] Got it.

[01:03:31] You know when I restore the fortunes of Judah and Jerusalem.

[01:03:35] Okay.

[01:03:35] You know when that thing happened.

[01:03:36] Wait.

[01:03:37] Wait.

[01:03:37] We're talking about Judah now.

[01:03:38] We didn't do that until just now.

[01:03:41] We were talking about Israel last chapter.

[01:03:43] That's odd.

[01:03:44] That is odd.

[01:03:45] So.

[01:03:45] Sorry.

[01:03:46] I was trying to figure out time frames last time and this was a whole other loop into

[01:03:49] the.

[01:03:49] Right.

[01:03:50] You know the mix.

[01:03:51] So I'm like what is going on?

[01:03:53] You're like never mind.

[01:03:53] Nothing.

[01:03:53] I give up.

[01:03:54] Yep.

[01:03:54] Yep.

[01:03:55] So when I restore the fortunes of Judah and Jerusalem I will gather all nations and bring

[01:04:02] them down to the valley of Jehoshaphat.

[01:04:05] Okay.

[01:04:06] Jehoshaphat.

[01:04:07] All right.

[01:04:07] All right.

[01:04:08] Okay.

[01:04:08] That's what he's going to do.

[01:04:09] There I will put them on trial for what they did to my inheritance.

[01:04:14] Oh.

[01:04:15] My people of Israel because they scattered my people among the nations and divided up

[01:04:21] my land.

[01:04:22] Huh.

[01:04:23] Look what they did.

[01:04:24] Those fucks.

[01:04:25] I mean I can almost see this being the Babylonian exile.

[01:04:27] Yeah.

[01:04:28] Right.

[01:04:29] Yeah.

[01:04:29] Like I don't even know where the fuck we're talking about at this point.

[01:04:32] I don't either.

[01:04:32] But okay.

[01:04:33] Okay.

[01:04:33] Yeah.

[01:04:34] They cast lots for my people and traded boys for prostitutes.

[01:04:39] Oh.

[01:04:39] They sold girls for wine to drink.

[01:04:42] Jeez.

[01:04:44] That's not okay.

[01:04:45] They got rid of their kids.

[01:04:46] But you know what though?

[01:04:47] I don't want to judge too much here but God told the Israelites at one point to take a

[01:04:54] bunch of girls as slave wives.

[01:04:57] He sure as fuck did.

[01:04:58] Yeah.

[01:04:58] I'm you know I'm just saying that kind of did some of the same things.

[01:05:03] Like oh it's fine when you tell them to steal women but then when they go and do it themselves

[01:05:09] then there's a problem.

[01:05:10] Seems like a bit of a double standard to me.

[01:05:12] Mm-hmm.

[01:05:12] Not only that but you told them to have 500 kids each.

[01:05:17] Right.

[01:05:17] And so maybe they didn't actually sell them for wine to drink or sell them for prostitutes

[01:05:24] or whatever.

[01:05:25] Or maybe maybe what they did was sell them for wine for the the sacrifice worship thing.

[01:05:34] You know because maybe they had like 10,000 kids.

[01:05:37] Right.

[01:05:38] And they're like well I can either have my 10,000 kids and I can't give a sacrifice thing.

[01:05:44] He's talking about the other nations did this to his people.

[01:05:48] That that's why he was complaining.

[01:05:50] That's why I was saying that he had done this also.

[01:05:53] Okay.

[01:05:54] Okay.

[01:05:54] You're right.

[01:05:55] I apologize.

[01:05:56] I thought he was saying I thought God is like my people suck so fucking bad.

[01:06:00] No.

[01:06:01] No.

[01:06:01] Okay.

[01:06:01] The other nations.

[01:06:03] The other nations.

[01:06:04] The other people.

[01:06:05] This is why I keep you because well I have a hard time paying attention while I'm reading.

[01:06:10] Right.

[01:06:10] So I don't always get everything.

[01:06:12] Got it.

[01:06:12] Now what have you against me Tyre and Sidon and all that.

[01:06:19] Whoa whoa hold on let me try that again.

[01:06:21] Now what have you against me Tyre and Sidon and all you regions of Philistia.

[01:06:28] Are you repaying me for something I have done?

[01:06:31] Question mark.

[01:06:32] Why is God asking a question of these places?

[01:06:36] Maybe what they're doing is repaying you because you took their fucking land.

[01:06:39] Right.

[01:06:40] Like yeah.

[01:06:41] Yeah.

[01:06:42] You at one time told your people to wipe them out and they're like we don't want to get

[01:06:47] wiped out.

[01:06:47] My misremembering is Tyre is at the port place that we talked about recently.

[01:06:52] Oh I think you're right.

[01:06:53] So it's interesting because that wasn't brought up until we started talking about the Babylonian

[01:06:59] exile and early just as we started this chapter it sounded more like the Babylonian exile.

[01:07:04] So it almost feels like these are written in three separate time frames like each chapter

[01:07:09] was written completely different times.

[01:07:11] Out of order even.

[01:07:12] Not necessarily out of order because yeah we talked about the first chapter could have

[01:07:16] been pre-Hosea.

[01:07:18] Okay.

[01:07:18] Second chapter could have been the Assyrians which was after or during Hosea.

[01:07:24] Yeah.

[01:07:24] And then the Babylonian exile obviously is much later.

[01:07:26] Okay.

[01:07:27] I see what you're saying.

[01:07:28] Yeah.

[01:07:28] All right.

[01:07:29] So anyway why are you so mad bro?

[01:07:31] If you are paying me back I will swiftly and speedily return on your own heads what you

[01:07:38] have done.

[01:07:39] So vengeance.

[01:07:40] He's going to he's going to enact vengeance.

[01:07:42] Yes because ours is a fickle God and and a vengeful God.

[01:07:48] Right.

[01:07:49] He's not they say he's a loving God but I don't get that.

[01:07:53] Right.

[01:07:53] And it really depends on who you are.

[01:07:55] And what day.

[01:07:57] Yeah.

[01:07:57] Mostly he's just a prick.

[01:08:00] For you took my silver and gold and I'm a God and I care about that shit.

[01:08:05] Right.

[01:08:05] Yeah.

[01:08:05] And carried off my finest fucking treasures to your temples.

[01:08:09] I love I'm a God.

[01:08:11] I love gold and silver and treasures.

[01:08:15] Isn't it.

[01:08:15] Yeah.

[01:08:16] Okay.

[01:08:16] I know I'm jumping ahead here but I distinctly recall Christians saying something about giving

[01:08:23] away all your worldly possessions and Jesus and things like that.

[01:08:25] But you know who wears the most jewelry and makeup?

[01:08:29] Baptist.

[01:08:31] Yep.

[01:08:32] Yep.

[01:08:33] Maybe that's just my impression.

[01:08:34] I am stereotyping hardcore right now.

[01:08:37] Sorry about that.

[01:08:38] You know but.

[01:08:39] But that's what I.

[01:08:40] In my experience that's who they are.

[01:08:42] Yeah.

[01:08:42] I mean I lived in South San Antonio Texas and you know I have family that is Baptist.

[01:08:51] Right.

[01:08:51] And in my experience they sing the highest warbly voices in choruses in church and they wear the

[01:09:01] most makeup.

[01:09:01] They have the tallest hair.

[01:09:04] Yeah.

[01:09:05] And yeah they wear the most fucking jewelry.

[01:09:07] Right.

[01:09:08] And also they're the same bitches that are like you have to wear your Sunday best.

[01:09:12] You got to dress up in the house of God.

[01:09:15] Now look I want to I want to say this because there are different Baptist groups out there.

[01:09:20] Okay.

[01:09:20] And I don't think all of them are the same.

[01:09:22] I'm only speaking of the ones I've been around.

[01:09:25] And I'm not sure exactly which ones are the ones we're thinking of.

[01:09:27] They might be the Southern Baptist which is the one I would probably think it is.

[01:09:30] Yeah.

[01:09:31] But I don't know that 100% either.

[01:09:33] Well that's the ones I'm acquainted with.

[01:09:35] Sure.

[01:09:36] Okay.

[01:09:36] And they don't want you coming into their church unless you are dressed in your finest.

[01:09:41] You got to look pretty.

[01:09:43] Right.

[01:09:43] Preferably white but you know.

[01:09:45] Right.

[01:09:46] Yeah.

[01:09:47] All right.

[01:09:47] Anyway fuck those people you sold the people of Judah and Jerusalem to the Greeks that you

[01:09:53] might send them far from their homeland.

[01:09:56] See I'm going to rouse them out of the places to which you sold them and I'll return on your

[01:10:03] own heads what you done.

[01:10:05] Okay.

[01:10:07] Yeah.

[01:10:07] Remember how I'm vengeful.

[01:10:08] Right.

[01:10:09] I'm God don't fuck with me.

[01:10:11] Yeah.

[01:10:11] I will sell your sons and daughters to the people of Judah because I love punishing

[01:10:16] children.

[01:10:17] So wait wait wait.

[01:10:18] He's going to do the same thing back.

[01:10:21] That's what he's literally saying.

[01:10:23] Yes I will do unto your head what you've done to my people.

[01:10:26] So he's going to condone slavery because they did slavery.

[01:10:30] Yeah.

[01:10:31] That's crap.

[01:10:32] You stole our kids.

[01:10:33] I'll steal your kids.

[01:10:34] What?

[01:10:35] Two evils don't make a right.

[01:10:37] Fuck those kids.

[01:10:38] That's not okay.

[01:10:40] But that's what God is saying.

[01:10:41] You stole some of our kids.

[01:10:43] I'm a God and I can get your kids.

[01:10:46] I'm going to steal your kids now.

[01:10:48] That is petty ass bullshit and that's evil.

[01:10:52] That is evil.

[01:10:53] Like that is not even you can't talk that away.

[01:10:58] God is saying I'm going to turn your kids into slaves.

[01:11:02] Yeah.

[01:11:03] Fuck those kids.

[01:11:04] That's what he's saying.

[01:11:04] That's fucked up.

[01:11:05] That's fucked up.

[01:11:05] No I totally agree.

[01:11:06] Okay and anybody who says it's not mine to know.

[01:11:10] Well if you are okay with that I have a problem with you.

[01:11:14] Right.

[01:11:14] You know if you are saying I can't explain it.

[01:11:18] I just have to accept it.

[01:11:20] Well that's pretty for you.

[01:11:21] I don't have to accept it.

[01:11:22] Right.

[01:11:23] Okay.

[01:11:23] How about that?

[01:11:24] All right.

[01:11:25] I will sell your I just have to read it again.

[01:11:28] Yeah.

[01:11:28] I will sell your sons and daughters to the people of Judah and they will sell them to

[01:11:33] the Sabians a nation far away.

[01:11:36] Wow.

[01:11:37] So they're not just they're not only going they're turning into slave traders.

[01:11:42] Yeah.

[01:11:43] Wow.

[01:11:44] Yeah.

[01:11:44] Wow.

[01:11:44] The Lord has spoken.

[01:11:46] That's what it says.

[01:11:47] That is that's crazy.

[01:11:49] He's like fuck with me and I will hard fuck with you.

[01:11:52] Right.

[01:11:52] But that's like the most direct.

[01:11:54] Yeah.

[01:11:55] But I like he's talked about slaves being okay before.

[01:11:58] Uh huh.

[01:11:58] Right.

[01:11:58] But like that is a statement saying I'm going to they're going to be slavers.

[01:12:04] They're going to enslave people and sell them.

[01:12:06] Yeah.

[01:12:07] And and I'm going to condone that.

[01:12:09] Yeah.

[01:12:09] Like that's my word.

[01:12:10] That's my it's my that's what I'm saying.

[01:12:12] Not just condone it.

[01:12:13] I'm going to make it happen.

[01:12:15] Right.

[01:12:15] And I'm pretty fucking enthusiastic about it because you stole my kids first.

[01:12:21] And this is the word of God.

[01:12:22] And this is the word of God.

[01:12:24] I've spoken.

[01:12:25] Right.

[01:12:25] Everybody listen.

[01:12:26] But they don't cover that one at Sunday school.

[01:12:28] I bet they don't.

[01:12:30] Right.

[01:12:30] Proclaim this among the nations.

[01:12:32] Prepare for war.

[01:12:34] Rouse the warriors.

[01:12:35] Let all the fighting men draw near and attack.

[01:12:38] Beat your plowshares into swords.

[01:12:41] There it is.

[01:12:42] Yeah.

[01:12:42] And your pruning hooks into spears.

[01:12:44] Make weapons.

[01:12:45] We going to fight.

[01:12:46] Mm hmm.

[01:12:47] Love me a good murder.

[01:12:48] Mm hmm.

[01:12:49] Let the weakling say I am strong.

[01:12:52] Come quickly.

[01:12:53] All you nations from every side and assemble there.

[01:12:56] Bring down your warriors.

[01:12:58] Lord.

[01:12:58] Let the nations be roused.

[01:13:01] Let them advance into the valley of Jehoshaphat.

[01:13:04] For there I will sit to judge all the nations on every side.

[01:13:09] Swing the sickle for the harvest is ripe.

[01:13:13] Wow.

[01:13:14] I need.

[01:13:15] That is.

[01:13:16] That is.

[01:13:17] That is a Halloween statement.

[01:13:19] Right.

[01:13:19] Can you not picture like Jack the Pumpkin King like walking around?

[01:13:23] Swing the sickle for the harvest is ripe.

[01:13:26] It's a good line.

[01:13:27] Right.

[01:13:28] Right.

[01:13:28] I mean it's grotesque.

[01:13:30] It should not be in the Bible.

[01:13:31] No.

[01:13:31] Has no place in the Bible.

[01:13:33] Well.

[01:13:33] To be fair.

[01:13:34] It does.

[01:13:35] In the Old Testament.

[01:13:36] Yeah.

[01:13:37] But it shouldn't.

[01:13:38] Because it's you know.

[01:13:39] Because violence and gore.

[01:13:41] Yeah.

[01:13:41] But.

[01:13:42] Not.

[01:13:43] Not the book I was sold.

[01:13:45] You know.

[01:13:46] That's all I'm saying.

[01:13:48] Swing the sickle for the harvest is ripe.

[01:13:50] I'm just having a hard time reconciling.

[01:13:53] The Old Testament God.

[01:13:54] With what I was.

[01:13:56] What I always knew.

[01:13:57] Yeah.

[01:13:58] Thought or thought I knew.

[01:13:59] God is love.

[01:14:00] Jesus is forgiveness.

[01:14:02] Right.

[01:14:02] Kind of stuff.

[01:14:03] Yeah.

[01:14:03] This is a tough pill to swallow.

[01:14:05] Right.

[01:14:05] When you.

[01:14:06] When you.

[01:14:06] When you.

[01:14:07] Even as someone who wasn't religious.

[01:14:09] Grew up.

[01:14:10] Yeah.

[01:14:10] With a whole different image of what religion entails.

[01:14:12] Like that's not what I heard.

[01:14:14] Yeah.

[01:14:15] Right.

[01:14:17] Did y'all hear what so.

[01:14:18] Did y'all hear what God did?

[01:14:20] There are one page where left this shit out.

[01:14:21] Yeah.

[01:14:22] Yeah.

[01:14:22] It's true.

[01:14:24] Come trample the grapes for the wine press is full.

[01:14:27] And the bats overflow.

[01:14:29] So great is their wickedness.

[01:14:32] Multitudes.

[01:14:33] Multitudes.

[01:14:34] In the valley of decision.

[01:14:35] For the day of the Lord.

[01:14:37] There it is.

[01:14:37] Number five.

[01:14:38] Okay.

[01:14:38] For the day of the Lord is near in the valley of decision.

[01:14:41] What's a valley of decision?

[01:14:43] Yeah.

[01:14:43] I don't know.

[01:14:44] Okay.

[01:14:44] That's a Q&A.

[01:14:45] Right.

[01:14:46] We got a Judah versus Israel thing.

[01:14:49] And now we've got a valley of decision.

[01:14:50] He was talking about Jehoshaphat.

[01:14:52] Like bringing them all there.

[01:14:53] Mm-hmm.

[01:14:53] I'm assuming the valley of decision is where they're all going to be judged.

[01:14:57] I guess.

[01:14:57] I guess.

[01:14:58] Sure.

[01:14:59] So.

[01:14:59] The sun and moon will be darkened and the stars no longer shine.

[01:15:03] Okay.

[01:15:04] I guess they had an eclipse.

[01:15:05] Yeah.

[01:15:05] Something.

[01:15:06] They had to call it magic.

[01:15:07] Right.

[01:15:08] Instead of just.

[01:15:08] Lots of clouds.

[01:15:09] Astrology happened.

[01:15:10] Right.

[01:15:11] Not astrology.

[01:15:12] Astronomy.

[01:15:14] God damn it.

[01:15:16] Astronomy.

[01:15:17] Fucking.

[01:15:18] What's that word?

[01:15:19] Where you mix up your words.

[01:15:21] I don't.

[01:15:22] You.

[01:15:23] Yeah.

[01:15:26] It's true.

[01:15:27] You know the one where you switch words.

[01:15:28] I don't know.

[01:15:29] You know what I'm talking about.

[01:15:30] I can't think of what it is.

[01:15:33] So.

[01:15:34] It's the one where you.

[01:15:35] You make your numbers and letters be backwards from each other.

[01:15:39] And you switch them out.

[01:15:40] Accidentally.

[01:15:41] Are you talking about dyslexia?

[01:15:43] Yes.

[01:15:43] That's the word I was looking for.

[01:15:45] Okay.

[01:15:45] I couldn't think of the fucking word.

[01:15:47] I didn't know it made you switch out words.

[01:15:49] Sometimes.

[01:15:50] Okay.

[01:15:51] If they're the same like sound.

[01:15:53] Like I have to think really hard.

[01:15:55] When I have astronomy and astrology.

[01:15:58] Like I have to think super super hard.

[01:16:00] I know the difference between them.

[01:16:01] But just like saying one versus the other.

[01:16:04] I'm like which sound word applies to this meaning?

[01:16:08] Sure.

[01:16:09] Shut up.

[01:16:10] No.

[01:16:10] I didn't.

[01:16:11] I didn't say anything.

[01:16:11] Oh my gosh.

[01:16:12] You're making fun of me.

[01:16:14] I'm not making fun of you.

[01:16:15] Your eyes are.

[01:16:17] Your eyes are making so much fun of me.

[01:16:19] You guys.

[01:16:20] If you could see him.

[01:16:22] The Lord will roar from Zion.

[01:16:25] Yeah.

[01:16:26] He should.

[01:16:26] Because.

[01:16:27] I guess.

[01:16:27] He gave me the making fun of me eyes.

[01:16:30] He's going to roar.

[01:16:31] Yeah.

[01:16:32] And thunder from Jerusalem.

[01:16:33] Okay.

[01:16:34] The earth and the heavens will tremble.

[01:16:36] But the Lord will be a refuge for his people.

[01:16:39] That's nice.

[01:16:40] A stronghold for the people of Israel.

[01:16:42] Just not anybody else.

[01:16:43] Yeah.

[01:16:43] No.

[01:16:43] No.

[01:16:44] Everybody else gets slaves or rapes or murdered.

[01:16:47] But I'm.

[01:16:48] The part that I'm struggling with here is the last chapter.

[01:16:51] Mm-hmm.

[01:16:52] In Joel.

[01:16:53] He was talking about sending people who were not his people against his people to kill

[01:16:59] them if they didn't, you know.

[01:17:01] Yeah.

[01:17:01] Capitulate with his, you know, orders of stopping the idol worship and shit like that or whatever.

[01:17:06] Right?

[01:17:07] Yeah.

[01:17:07] Yeah.

[01:17:07] So he was going to use these people to do the evil that he's now punishing them for.

[01:17:13] Mm-hmm.

[01:17:13] And enslaving their children for.

[01:17:15] Yeah.

[01:17:15] Which we've talked about before has done.

[01:17:17] He's done this before.

[01:17:18] Mm-hmm.

[01:17:19] Where he punishes the group of people that he sends to enact his judgment.

[01:17:23] Mm-hmm.

[01:17:24] And I'm like, okay, so you either have the power to send these people or you don't.

[01:17:29] Right.

[01:17:30] Right?

[01:17:30] Mm-hmm.

[01:17:30] And if you do have the power to send them, then I don't think you have the right or at

[01:17:37] least the morality behind punishing them becomes a little skewed at that point.

[01:17:44] It does.

[01:17:45] Yeah.

[01:17:45] Because if you sent them and then you punish them for going.

[01:17:49] Yeah.

[01:17:50] That's pretty fucked up.

[01:17:51] That is pretty fucked up.

[01:17:52] Right.

[01:17:52] Now, if they went and you just condoned it, then that's still a little questionable, I

[01:18:00] think.

[01:18:01] But okay.

[01:18:02] Yeah.

[01:18:03] I don't know.

[01:18:05] These things just don't make a whole lot of sense.

[01:18:07] No, they do not.

[01:18:08] I understand what they're saying, but they don't actually line up and make sense to me because

[01:18:14] it doesn't work.

[01:18:15] And I don't understand why people defend this shit.

[01:18:19] Like, how can you, if you've actually read this, how do you defend this?

[01:18:23] I don't, I don't get it.

[01:18:25] I don't either.

[01:18:26] They defend it by saying, well, it's not ours to understand and be okay with it.

[01:18:31] I get it.

[01:18:31] But like, but how, how are you okay with it?

[01:18:34] How many times can you say that through this book?

[01:18:36] Like we question, there's something in every chapter where we're like, that's fucked up

[01:18:40] or that's wrong.

[01:18:41] Or that's like, he did something back ass word there.

[01:18:45] Yeah.

[01:18:45] You know, like what, at what point do you just be like, okay, enough of the, you know, we

[01:18:50] don't know what he wants or if I'm not supposed to understand a single goddamn thing, then

[01:18:55] why am I wasting my time reading this shit?

[01:18:57] Yeah.

[01:18:57] Like what, what was the purpose?

[01:18:59] At some point you just have to say, yeah, it's, you can't understand it.

[01:19:02] Therefore it's not real.

[01:19:03] Yeah.

[01:19:04] It's not, it's not meant to be understood because it was written shittily with regard

[01:19:09] to how this all should have happened.

[01:19:10] If it was an actual God, it wasn't meant for posterity.

[01:19:15] Well, I mean, okay.

[01:19:16] It wasn't meant for posterity the way it has become.

[01:19:19] It was meant for posterity of a particular tribe of people recording their own history.

[01:19:27] Right.

[01:19:28] You know what I mean?

[01:19:29] Yeah.

[01:19:29] It was not meant to, to be what it is today.

[01:19:33] Sure.

[01:19:34] And that makes it just all the more gross.

[01:19:38] Well, and it was never meant to be accessible to general, you know, the general public.

[01:19:42] That's what I mean.

[01:19:43] So.

[01:19:43] Yeah.

[01:19:45] Then you will know that I, the Lord, your God dwell in Zion, my holy hill.

[01:19:51] Okay.

[01:19:51] What a holy hill.

[01:19:53] All kinds of holes in that there hill.

[01:19:56] Sure.

[01:19:56] Jerusalem will be holy.

[01:19:58] Never again will foreigners invade her.

[01:20:00] Right.

[01:20:01] Yeah.

[01:20:02] Okay.

[01:20:02] That'll never happen again.

[01:20:03] I mean, it literally just happened recently.

[01:20:06] Oops.

[01:20:07] Yeah.

[01:20:07] In that day, the mountains will drip new wine and the hills will flow with milk.

[01:20:16] All the ravines of Judah will run with water.

[01:20:20] A fountain will flow out of the Lord's house and will water the Valley of Acacias.

[01:20:27] Okay.

[01:20:27] But Egypt will be desolate, a desert waste because of violence done to the people of Judah, in

[01:20:36] whose land they shed innocent blood.

[01:20:39] Innocent blood.

[01:20:40] Get the fuck out of here.

[01:20:41] Fuck you.

[01:20:42] Judah will be inhabited forever and Jerusalem through all generations.

[01:20:47] Whee!

[01:20:48] Shall I leave their innocent blood unavenged?

[01:20:50] No, I will not.

[01:20:52] The Lord dwells in Zion!

[01:20:54] Exclamation point.

[01:20:55] The end.

[01:20:56] Okay.

[01:20:57] Yeah.

[01:20:58] There he be.

[01:20:58] Right.

[01:20:59] Right.

[01:20:59] Right.

[01:20:59] Right.

[01:20:59] Right.

[01:21:00] Um, yeah.

[01:21:02] I don't know what to say.

[01:21:03] I, this, this book felt very piecemeal and like just kind of slapped together.

[01:21:09] And, uh, I don't agree with a lot of the, uh, sentiment in this book because it doesn't

[01:21:14] actually line up with any line of, um, thinking throughout the whole thing.

[01:21:18] We went from locust to probably Assyrians to possibly Babylonia to, I don't know.

[01:21:28] I don't, I don't even know.

[01:21:29] Like there's no thread here.

[01:21:30] No, that's the problem.

[01:21:31] There's no thread.

[01:21:33] Right.

[01:21:33] Like it's just a bunch of different papers that got, they weren't stapled together.

[01:21:38] They were stuck together by coffee.

[01:21:41] Like somebody spilled coffee on their desk and then they were like trying to, you know,

[01:21:46] clean up the mess.

[01:21:46] And then they picked up all these various papers and these three got stuck together.

[01:21:50] And you would expect in a book that is from a God, right?

[01:21:54] Like most books, if you're reading them, they're going to have new different ideas that you can

[01:21:59] work through and you can, you know, kind of, they're, they're trying to teach you something

[01:22:03] or they're trying to move an idea.

[01:22:05] Right.

[01:22:06] But we keep rehashing the same shit all the time.

[01:22:09] Yeah.

[01:22:09] It's nothing new.

[01:22:11] He's so boring.

[01:22:13] Like God is so boring.

[01:22:16] Like the, the fact that I'm able to say, oh, you're murdering people again.

[01:22:21] Boring.

[01:22:22] Like that's gross.

[01:22:25] Yeah.

[01:22:25] I'm at the point where stealing people, murdering people, killing kids, whatever.

[01:22:31] Like boring.

[01:22:32] You've done that too many times now.

[01:22:34] Right, right.

[01:22:34] No, it used to upset us a little bit.

[01:22:36] A lot.

[01:22:37] And look, it's still.

[01:22:38] It is upsetting.

[01:22:39] It still is upsetting.

[01:22:40] But like, you can only say these things so many times before it's like, and there it is again.

[01:22:45] Um, it reminds me of the, um, the comedy news shows like Colbert and, um, you know, John Oliver and all, all them guys.

[01:22:56] Right.

[01:22:57] Trying to think of a new way to describe a school shooting or a mass shooting.

[01:23:04] Yeah.

[01:23:04] Like how many different ways and at what point and how many times and.

[01:23:11] And how do you keep showing, you know, a level of disgust for what has happened with regard to what laws need to be changed and everything else.

[01:23:21] Right.

[01:23:21] How do you keep showing that at the same level?

[01:23:25] Right.

[01:23:25] Because it's hard.

[01:23:27] It's hard to witness the same thing happening again and again and again and get yourself as amped up as you were the first time.

[01:23:34] Well, and there's also empathy.

[01:23:36] Burnout is a thing.

[01:23:38] Yeah.

[01:23:38] Like, um, from what I read, a lot of people in the medical field had this happen to them during, um, the beginning stages of the pandemic.

[01:23:48] Sure.

[01:23:49] When they were just dealing with like so much death.

[01:23:52] Yeah.

[01:23:52] That they just had empathy burnout.

[01:23:55] Right.

[01:23:56] Like you can only care and care and care and be upset on somebody else's behalf and have so much compassion and be hurt and want things to be better and ache for all the needless bloodshed and loss and the tragedy and the hurt.

[01:24:15] You can only feel all of that so much.

[01:24:18] Right.

[01:24:18] Before you start to become numb to it.

[01:24:20] And nobody wants to be that way.

[01:24:23] Nobody wants to feel numb.

[01:24:25] Like, I don't want to be like, ugh, there goes God killing kids again.

[01:24:29] Right.

[01:24:30] And I try to make light of it.

[01:24:32] Be like, yeah, love me some murder.

[01:24:35] But.

[01:24:35] Right.

[01:24:36] That's dark humor because I don't really know what else to say at this point.

[01:24:42] Well, I think that honestly, a lot of people probably that do or have read the Bible that are still religious, they, they gloss over this stuff because they're like, well, God punishes those who, you know, they, they write it off.

[01:24:53] Right.

[01:24:54] Yeah.

[01:24:54] God punishes those who disobey or are not worshiping him correctly.

[01:24:59] And that's his MO.

[01:25:00] Right.

[01:25:00] So they read murder, death, you know, annihilation as they didn't worship correctly and they move on to the next section.

[01:25:07] This whole large swath of people in general were bad.

[01:25:11] They don't, they don't question the inconsistencies.

[01:25:13] They don't question the, you know, the, the back and forth with regard to how he judges people in different groups in different times in different places.

[01:25:22] Well, that, and you're saying that you're perfectly okay with the kids who had no choice.

[01:25:29] Right.

[01:25:30] In this being, but they were part of that community.

[01:25:33] So they get it too.

[01:25:34] And what about the women who had no choice?

[01:25:38] What about the slaves who had no choice?

[01:25:40] What about the animals who keep getting slaughtered because they're like, fuck your animals too.

[01:25:46] Right.

[01:25:47] Like, Jesus.

[01:25:49] Yeah.

[01:25:50] No, it's all bad.

[01:25:51] It's all bad.

[01:25:52] The book is so bad.

[01:25:54] I hate it so much.

[01:25:55] I hate the Bible.

[01:25:56] There, I said it.

[01:25:57] I think that was pretty clear.

[01:25:59] Well, I don't think I ever said it straight though.

[01:26:02] Oh, okay.

[01:26:02] I hate the Bible.

[01:26:04] Got it.

[01:26:04] Yeah.

[01:26:05] I mean, I also hate the Bible.

[01:26:06] I didn't want to hate the Bible and I didn't go into this thinking that that would be a conclusion that I would reach before we even got out of the Old Testament.

[01:26:16] Right.

[01:26:17] But I fucking hate the Bible.

[01:26:19] It's so horrible.

[01:26:20] It is.

[01:26:21] It's the worst of mankind.

[01:26:23] And like, we're living through the worst of mankind.

[01:26:27] I hate that we have to read the worst of mankind while we are literally living through the worst of mankind.

[01:26:34] You know?

[01:26:35] Right.

[01:26:35] Stop.

[01:26:37] Get your shit straight, God.

[01:26:39] Get your shit straight, Republicans and Christians and people of the world.

[01:26:44] Like, gosh, stop.

[01:26:46] Right.

[01:26:47] Oh, sorry.

[01:26:47] I'm feeling a little bit bereft at the moment.

[01:26:51] Got it.

[01:26:52] Yeah.

[01:26:52] Everything sucks and it's awful.

[01:26:54] Have a good night.

[01:26:55] Bye, everybody.

[01:26:57] Join us at the Discord tonight.

[01:27:00] Yes.

[01:27:00] The link will be in the show notes, guys.

[01:27:02] Yes.

[01:27:02] All right.

[01:27:02] Bye.

[01:27:03] Bye.

[01:27:10] Bye.

[01:27:10] Do you know what the hell we're doing today?

[01:27:14] Well, we are a little late getting this out, first of all.

[01:27:18] Mm-hmm.

[01:27:18] I just want to recognize that fact.

[01:27:19] Just a tad.

[01:27:21] We suck.

[01:27:22] We suck.

[01:27:22] Well, in life.

[01:27:23] Yeah, in life, in life.

[01:27:24] Things happen.

[01:27:25] Right, right.

[01:27:26] But we had a really short book of the Bible and so today I believe we're finishing up the book of Joel.

[01:27:34] Oh, I would have called it the book of Jeff or the book of Billy Joel.

[01:27:38] But you would have been wrong.

[01:27:40] Or Joel Osment, Haley Joel Osment.

[01:27:43] I have no idea what you're talking about there.

[01:27:45] He's the kid from The Sixth Sense.

[01:27:47] Oh, okay.

[01:27:48] Okay, yeah, you should say wife is going to say pop reference and husband is going to go,

[01:27:53] what the fuck are you talking about?

[01:27:54] That's pretty much the general MO for any pop culture reference.

[01:27:59] Right, right.

[01:28:00] That's true.

[01:28:01] That is true.

[01:28:02] So we're doing our wrap up today then?

[01:28:04] Yeah, and it's got a little bit of Q&A because there were only three chapters.

[01:28:08] Yeah, we didn't have a Q&A.

[01:28:09] So that's why you don't get the full jingle.

[01:28:12] Got it.

[01:28:12] It was just a half jingle.

[01:28:13] Mm-hmm.

[01:28:14] Got it.

[01:28:14] Okay, all right.

[01:28:15] And plus, we're not doing this on a Saturday.

[01:28:17] See?

[01:28:17] So there's that too.

[01:28:18] Right.

[01:28:18] Yeah.

[01:28:19] All right.

[01:28:20] Are you ready to get into the wrap up then?

[01:28:21] Sure as fuck am.

[01:28:22] Let's do this.

[01:28:23] Okie dokie.

[01:28:30] Okay, so we are doing a wrap up over the book of Billy Joel.

[01:28:36] What?

[01:28:38] Well, we didn't start the fire.

[01:28:40] No.

[01:28:41] Joel.

[01:28:42] The book of Joel.

[01:28:43] The book of Joel.

[01:28:43] Yeah.

[01:28:44] Not Billy.

[01:28:44] Right.

[01:28:45] Right.

[01:28:45] Yeah.

[01:28:45] Okay.

[01:28:46] So do you remember when we were like, when was it written?

[01:28:51] Probably early on.

[01:28:52] Uh-uh.

[01:28:53] Right.

[01:28:53] Yeah.

[01:28:53] Yeah.

[01:28:53] Well, and more than that, it felt like each book might have been written at a different

[01:28:57] time frame.

[01:28:58] Which is very likely.

[01:28:59] Okay.

[01:28:59] That makes me feel better because it definitely felt that way.

[01:29:03] Yeah.

[01:29:04] Yeah.

[01:29:04] I mean, we kind of knew that going in because that was in our intro.

[01:29:07] Sure.

[01:29:08] Yeah.

[01:29:08] We had talked about how probably if there was an original Joel, that first book was probably

[01:29:13] that one.

[01:29:14] And then other people added to it.

[01:29:16] Right.

[01:29:16] Exactly.

[01:29:17] But there are a bunch of different theories that I thought I would present a few of.

[01:29:22] I'm sure there are.

[01:29:23] Would you like to hear some of them?

[01:29:24] I'm so excited to hear this.

[01:29:25] Yes.

[01:29:25] So some historians think that Joel prophesied while the kingdom of Judah subsisted, but not

[01:29:31] long before its subversion, as his words seem to imply that its captivity was approaching.

[01:29:38] This would mean that he lived under Manasseh and before his conversion, which was sometime

[01:29:44] from before 697 to around 660 BCE.

[01:29:49] Okay.

[01:29:49] That seems, I don't know.

[01:29:51] That seems a little later than I would have expected, maybe.

[01:29:54] Yeah.

[01:29:54] I don't know.

[01:29:55] So that was saying that.

[01:29:56] So are we thinking, I'm having trouble with timeframes here.

[01:30:00] Is that before the Babylonian invasion or the Assyrian invasion?

[01:30:03] Which one is that?

[01:30:04] Because I thought the, I can't remember which one's which and what timeframes they were.

[01:30:10] So I'm curious.

[01:30:11] You didn't look that up, did you?

[01:30:13] Honestly, no.

[01:30:13] I have the years.

[01:30:14] I don't have like what was happening.

[01:30:17] I'm like looking at wife and she's giving me the blank stare thing.

[01:30:20] Like I don't fucking know.

[01:30:21] So I'll just ask.

[01:30:23] Okay.

[01:30:23] And you can go on.

[01:30:24] Okay.

[01:30:25] Well, other scholars date the book of Joel even further back, which felt more real.

[01:30:30] Because remember, we thought it sounded like some of the Deuteronomistic peoples were writing it.

[01:30:36] So other scholars date it to around 835 BCE.

[01:30:41] Okay.

[01:30:42] Which I can see that.

[01:30:43] Yeah.

[01:30:43] That sounds more realistic.

[01:30:45] Yeah.

[01:30:45] This would make Joel a pre-exilic, so pre-exile prophet who served before the fall of the northern kingdom of Israel in 721 BCE.

[01:30:55] Uh-huh.

[01:30:55] And the southern kingdom of Judah in 586 BCE.

[01:31:00] Okay.

[01:31:00] So that feels more like what we're talking about, you know?

[01:31:04] It would also make Joel one of the earliest prophets.

[01:31:08] Wait, what was that about 586 and 5...

[01:31:10] You weren't listening.

[01:31:11] No, I'm trying to figure out the timeframes on stuff here.

[01:31:15] So I apologize.

[01:31:16] Are you listening?

[01:31:17] Yeah.

[01:31:17] So before we do that, though, I do want to say that the Assyrian invasion kind of started around like 740 to 732 BCE.

[01:31:26] And then the Babylonian invasion started in the late 500 BCE.

[01:31:32] So like 597 to 587 type timeframe.

[01:31:35] Okay.

[01:31:36] So let's go through that one more time.

[01:31:37] Like what were the timeframes and what were they?

[01:31:39] The first one mentioned was living under Manasseh.

[01:31:43] Yeah.

[01:31:44] Um, sometime from before 697 to around 660 BCE.

[01:31:50] Okay.

[01:31:50] But that didn't feel early enough to me.

[01:31:53] Right, right.

[01:31:53] And then other scholars date the book of Joel even further back to 835 BCE.

[01:32:00] Okay.

[01:32:00] This would make Joel a pre-exile prophet who served before the fall of the northern kingdom of Israel in 721 BCE and the southern kingdom of Judah in 586 BCE.

[01:32:11] Okay.

[01:32:12] That sounds more correct.

[01:32:14] Right.

[01:32:15] Because when we were talking about the first chapter, right, we were talking about how he referred to them as Israel still.

[01:32:21] And there was a lot of, you know, on our part, a little bit of confusion because of how he was referring to things.

[01:32:28] And that makes more sense.

[01:32:30] And even if you're 100 years out, you're starting to feel the influence of those Assyrians that are going to be coming down on you shortly.

[01:32:37] Exactly.

[01:32:37] So, you know, it probably, that makes more sense to me.

[01:32:41] Yeah, me too.

[01:32:42] Me too.

[01:32:42] And they were using the term locusts.

[01:32:45] Yes.

[01:32:45] So I'm sure that that was part of that whole lead up to the Assyrian invasion.

[01:32:48] I am going to talk about the locusts in a bit.

[01:32:51] Okay.

[01:32:51] Because I have some shit to say.

[01:32:53] Okay.

[01:32:53] Okay.

[01:32:54] All right.

[01:32:55] I'm sorry.

[01:32:56] 835 BCE was a time of turmoil and transition in Judah at the end of the reign of the queen mother Athaliah and the beginning of the reign of King Joash.

[01:33:08] Hmm.

[01:33:09] Okay.

[01:33:09] Athaliah seized power at the sudden death and battle of her son Ahaziah.

[01:33:15] Okay.

[01:33:15] Who only reigned for one year.

[01:33:17] And that was described in 2 Kings chapter 8 and 2 Chronicles chapter 22.

[01:33:22] I do vaguely remember that.

[01:33:23] But I do.

[01:33:24] It's interesting that there was a queen.

[01:33:26] Yeah.

[01:33:26] I don't recall hearing about that.

[01:33:28] I vaguely remember that.

[01:33:29] But it was.

[01:33:30] Yeah.

[01:33:30] It's been a while since we talked about that.

[01:33:32] Well, Athaliah killed all her son's heirs except for one who was hidden in the temple and escaped.

[01:33:38] Oh, I do remember that.

[01:33:39] Yeah.

[01:33:39] Okay.

[01:33:40] Yeah.

[01:33:40] One year old Joash, who we talked about in 2 Kings.

[01:33:44] Yeah.

[01:33:45] Okay.

[01:33:45] Mm-hmm.

[01:33:45] Athaliah's six-year reign of terror ended in 835 BCE when the high priest Jehoiada overthrew her and set the seven-year-old Joash on the throne.

[01:33:59] Right.

[01:33:59] That was described in 2 Kings chapter 11.

[01:34:01] Okay.

[01:34:02] During her six years as queen over Judah, Athaliah reigned wickedly.

[01:34:07] She was the granddaughter of the ungodly King Omri of Israel, making her daughter or niece to Ahab one of Israel's worst kings as described in 2 Kings chapter 8.

[01:34:20] Got it.

[01:34:21] Athaliah, the bitch queen, raised her son Ahaziah to reign in the same wicked pattern of Ahab and even brought in Ahab's counselors to advise him.

[01:34:33] Oh, wow.

[01:34:33] And that was described in 2 Chronicles chapter 22.

[01:34:36] Okay.

[01:34:37] When Ahaziah was killed in battle, Athaliah seized power and set her other sons to do evil, even desecrating the temple and its sacred things.

[01:34:47] Got it.

[01:34:48] We read about that in 2 Chronicles chapter 24.

[01:34:52] It is, if it is accurate to think that Joel prophesied in 835 BCE, then the judgment he described came toward the end of the six-year reign of evil under Queen Athaliah.

[01:35:04] Okay.

[01:35:05] So that could, I don't, I'm not opposed.

[01:35:07] Sure.

[01:35:08] You know what I mean?

[01:35:08] Yeah.

[01:35:10] We'll talk a little bit more about some other ideas.

[01:35:13] Right, right.

[01:35:14] But first, let's talk about those locusts.

[01:35:17] Yeah.

[01:35:17] Okay.

[01:35:18] No, the wording, the way that they say it intrigues me because of how we've learned that the Assyrians were referred to as locusts.

[01:35:26] Sure, sure.

[01:35:27] Now, Israel has actually experienced locust invasions even in modern history.

[01:35:33] So let's talk about that.

[01:35:35] Yeah.

[01:35:36] One of the most notable recent outbreaks occurred in March of 2013.

[01:35:41] Oh.

[01:35:41] When swarms of locusts from Egypt invaded Israel just before the Passover holiday, the swarms mainly affected the Negev Desert and other southern regions of the country, causing damage to crops and vegetation.

[01:35:55] So it sounds more like a pass through.

[01:35:58] Mm-hmm.

[01:35:59] Mm-hmm.

[01:35:59] Shut up.

[01:36:01] The Israeli government responded with aerial and ground pesticide spraying to control the outbreak and minimize agricultural losses, which would have been just drastic.

[01:36:12] Yeah.

[01:36:12] Yeah.

[01:36:13] Yeah.

[01:36:13] And something they wouldn't have been capable of managing back in ancient times.

[01:36:16] Right.

[01:36:17] So let's go back a little bit further back, though.

[01:36:19] Okay.

[01:36:19] Yeah.

[01:36:20] So this was 2013.

[01:36:22] Another significant locust invasion occurred in the early 1950s during a period when locusts were widespread across the Middle East, including Israel.

[01:36:34] These outbreaks can still happen occasionally, often linked to favorable breeding conditions in nearby regions such as North Africa or the Arabian Peninsula.

[01:36:44] Got it.

[01:36:44] One of the earliest recorded locust plagues in the region occurred in 1915 during the final years of the Ottoman Empire.

[01:36:54] And this one apparently is like really well known.

[01:36:57] Even though it's the earliest in recorded modern history.

[01:37:01] Right.

[01:37:01] Okay.

[01:37:02] Yeah.

[01:37:02] A massive locust invasion struck the areas of present-day Israel, Palestine, and parts of Lebanon and Syria.

[01:37:09] The swarms caused significant agricultural devastation, destroying crops, fruit trees, and other vegetation.

[01:37:17] The event worsened an already difficult period marked by World War I and a blockade that had led to food shortages in the region.

[01:37:26] So what I'm hearing here is that in modern history, it's happened within three times within 100 years.

[01:37:32] Yeah.

[01:37:32] Right.

[01:37:33] So these things didn't happen often, often, but they happen enough to be in recent memory.

[01:37:39] Yeah.

[01:37:39] Right.

[01:37:40] And so I can see how events like this would be tied to a god or lack of belief in that god or whatever.

[01:37:49] Right.

[01:37:49] But it makes sense, right?

[01:37:50] But they're just ecological events.

[01:37:52] They're natural events that are happening because of conditions that occur.

[01:37:56] But the fact that they only happen every so often makes it seem even more cuckoo beings magical when it does.

[01:38:04] Right.

[01:38:04] Much like we attribute way too much meaning to like solar eclipses and things like that.

[01:38:08] Like every time there's an eclipse, the Christians just lose their fucking mind because they didn't see it written on the fucking calendar.

[01:38:14] Oh, my God.

[01:38:14] You remember all this last time we had the...

[01:38:16] Yeah.

[01:38:17] I mean, there was like...

[01:38:18] It's...

[01:38:18] There's always prophecies of fucking end times, especially if it's happened in the United States.

[01:38:21] Yeah.

[01:38:22] Like they're all like, world's gonna end.

[01:38:25] Look at these cities it's passing over.

[01:38:26] It's passing over names that mean something.

[01:38:29] Look, man.

[01:38:30] I'm just like...

[01:38:31] And then I'm like, we're still here, guys.

[01:38:32] We're still here.

[01:38:33] Well, not only that, but did you not know that you could look this shit up online and like plan accordingly?

[01:38:39] So if you're really that scared that the eclipse is gonna get ya...

[01:38:43] Yeah.

[01:38:44] You can actually see when they're coming and like build your underground bunker and hide away.

[01:38:49] That's crazy.

[01:38:50] It's almost like science works.

[01:38:52] Right?

[01:38:53] Like, wow, man.

[01:38:56] So yeah, they're just weird.

[01:38:59] People are.

[01:38:59] They are.

[01:39:00] Yeah.

[01:39:00] So the 1915 locust plague is very well documented with photographs and firsthand accounts describing the thick swarms that darken the sky and stripped the land of greenery.

[01:39:13] I would be interested in some of those photographs.

[01:39:15] So would I.

[01:39:16] The infestation lasted several months with multiple waves of locusts causing severe food scarcity and economic hardship because every time the adult ones die, the next wave of the ones that they already laid come in because their cycle is so short that it doesn't take much.

[01:39:39] So it's a real, real problem.

[01:39:41] It is a real problem and it's a real thing.

[01:39:43] So when those people were like, fuck me, the locusts are coming.

[01:39:47] Like, yeah.

[01:39:48] We think we got it bad with cicadas over here, but no, apparently locusts are just a whole next level shit.

[01:39:53] And ladybugs.

[01:39:54] I never saw so many fucking ladybugs.

[01:39:57] Okay, listen, I moved to Ohio in the year 2000 and I had only ever prior to that seen like a couple ladybugs here and there.

[01:40:07] Like I could probably count on both hands in my entire life.

[01:40:10] The number of times I'd seen a ladybug in person.

[01:40:13] We lived in a yellow house.

[01:40:15] Do you remember?

[01:40:16] Yeah.

[01:40:16] Okay.

[01:40:16] I'll let you.

[01:40:17] They fucking swarm.

[01:40:19] Yeah.

[01:40:19] They were like covering the door.

[01:40:21] It was bad.

[01:40:21] Well, I lived in prior to that, prior to me and you, I lived in a house where I went out back and this was, this was like in the summer of 2001.

[01:40:31] So this is the first time I'd ever seen such a thing.

[01:40:34] Right.

[01:40:34] We had a tree in our backyard and it was completely covered.

[01:40:40] Like you could not see the wood.

[01:40:42] And this was ladybugs.

[01:40:44] Yeah.

[01:40:44] Harmless.

[01:40:45] But I was like.

[01:40:46] I mean, they'll bite you.

[01:40:47] I mean, some.

[01:40:48] It depends on the species.

[01:40:50] Right.

[01:40:50] Yeah.

[01:40:50] But these were all the red ones.

[01:40:52] I don't know what species they were, but I was kind of freaked the fuck out because I'd never seen such a thing.

[01:40:58] It's not about the bug itself.

[01:40:59] The bug looks harmless, right?

[01:41:01] Right.

[01:41:01] No.

[01:41:02] But it's the quantity.

[01:41:02] It's the quantity and the realization that they could cover you, smother you, crawl into your orifices and you die.

[01:41:09] Because they're like, there's no way to understand what a whole fuck ton a lot means until you see that.

[01:41:15] I don't know that this is absolutely like scientific fact, but like when we lived in the house that was yellow, which we referred to as the yellow house.

[01:41:27] Mm-hmm.

[01:41:27] And I think that lighter pastel colors or yellow, maybe specifically.

[01:41:33] Yeah.

[01:41:33] Are something that they're attracted to.

[01:41:35] And like we had our entire, like one side of our house was like just cut, not completely, but it had a fuck ton of fucking ladybugs on it.

[01:41:44] It was just crazy.

[01:41:45] And like I said, I'd never seen such a thing until I moved to Ohio.

[01:41:48] Yeah.

[01:41:48] So go Midwest.

[01:41:50] Yeah.

[01:41:51] Right.

[01:41:51] So locust invasions have been a part of the region's history.

[01:41:54] I'm not talking about the Midwest of America anymore.

[01:41:57] Right.

[01:41:57] We're going back to Israel.

[01:41:58] Okay.

[01:41:59] For centuries dating back to ancient times.

[01:42:02] Of course.

[01:42:02] It's in the fucking Bible.

[01:42:03] Right.

[01:42:04] Outside of religious texts, however, historical records from various ancient civilizations such as the Egyptians and the Mesopotamians mention locust invasions affecting the broader Middle Eastern region.

[01:42:18] Sure.

[01:42:19] Including areas that would have encompassed ancient Israel.

[01:42:23] For example, Assyrian inscriptions from the 8th century BCE record locust plagues as signs of divine displeasure.

[01:42:32] Interesting.

[01:42:32] Yeah.

[01:42:33] And that would line up with the time frames that they're talking about with Joel.

[01:42:37] Mm-hmm.

[01:42:37] 8th century BCE, right?

[01:42:39] Mm-hmm.

[01:42:39] You said that 835 was like in that queen.

[01:42:42] Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[01:42:42] So like, yeah.

[01:42:43] So that would be the same time frames.

[01:42:45] Yeah, that makes sense.

[01:42:45] Possibly.

[01:42:46] Possibly, yeah.

[01:42:46] But it would be interesting to see, like, take the Egyptian historical accounts and the Babylonian historical, whatever, all the groups that were keeping historical records at that time.

[01:42:55] Yeah.

[01:42:56] And compare them to these passages in the Bible.

[01:43:00] Right.

[01:43:00] Just to see if there's any inference as to, like, this stuff going on.

[01:43:04] How do they line up?

[01:43:05] Right.

[01:43:06] Right.

[01:43:06] Not do they line up, but how do they line up?

[01:43:08] But that would be one way to, like, I mean, I find that whole field of study very intriguing.

[01:43:13] Right.

[01:43:14] Because you're taking things from here and there and piecing it together and seeing if this matches and that.

[01:43:19] It's like a puzzle.

[01:43:20] Yeah.

[01:43:20] And I find it very, very cool.

[01:43:22] It's putting together the pieces of history that up until now have been a mystery.

[01:43:26] Right.

[01:43:27] And you think about it, like, you know, we're talking about a time span of under 3,000 years total.

[01:43:33] Right.

[01:43:34] And it does seem like a long time.

[01:43:38] But in the grand scheme of the history of this world, it's absolutely nothing.

[01:43:42] Right.

[01:43:42] It's absolutely nothing.

[01:43:43] So we're still trying to piece together recent Earth history from our own time frame.

[01:43:50] And to me, that is just one of the coolest things about humans is that we care about that.

[01:43:55] Some of us care about that history of where we came from and how we got here.

[01:43:58] Well, I think even using the word modern history, like, okay, the entire last 3,000 years is modern history compared to, you know, the entirety of the Earth.

[01:44:10] Yeah, if you look at it, like, one of our favorite shows is the one that Neil deGrasse Tyson did.

[01:44:16] It was Cosmos or whatever.

[01:44:17] Well, the one that was Sagan before that.

[01:44:20] We did from Sagan, yeah.

[01:44:20] Yeah.

[01:44:20] But they had, like, the history of the planet and the universe.

[01:44:25] And they showed it in, like, time frames of where we existed.

[01:44:28] Like on a clock.

[01:44:29] And we're just a fucking blip.

[01:44:31] Yeah.

[01:44:31] We're, like, right before midnight.

[01:44:33] Yeah.

[01:44:33] Like a blink of an eye.

[01:44:34] Yeah, we're nothing.

[01:44:35] Yeah.

[01:44:36] So that's what I mean.

[01:44:38] Like, it's interesting to use the word modern history.

[01:44:41] Like, we know in context that, oh, no, we're only talking about the last, like, 300 years or so.

[01:44:48] Right.

[01:44:48] Modern history.

[01:44:49] Well, and one of the things that I find that distinguishes atheists and secular from the Christians, or any religious group, really, is our ability to find wonder and awe in the fact that we are so insignificant.

[01:45:03] Right.

[01:45:03] Right.

[01:45:03] Exactly.

[01:45:04] We don't need to attribute significance to our existence.

[01:45:08] We find beauty in the fact that we do exist from such a vast universe of possibilities.

[01:45:15] Right.

[01:45:15] Like, that's where the quote-unquote magic lies for us.

[01:45:19] Yeah.

[01:45:19] And we understand that it's not magic, but it gives us that same feeling of awe.

[01:45:24] Right.

[01:45:24] And it just makes me wonder, like, oh, you can't find awe in that?

[01:45:30] Right.

[01:45:30] Like, you have to think that the earth is the center of the universe and that the sun moves around us, huh?

[01:45:36] And I almost feel sorry for them.

[01:45:38] Right.

[01:45:39] Right?

[01:45:39] To not be able to see the beauty in that.

[01:45:41] To not be able to experience.

[01:45:42] To need to be big in order to feel any kind of awe.

[01:45:47] Lose your self-importance.

[01:45:48] Lose your need to be something more and just experience what it is to be alive.

[01:45:55] Right.

[01:45:56] You know?

[01:45:56] I mean, it's why they're so offended when we say that humans are animals.

[01:46:01] Right.

[01:46:02] And they're like, how dare?

[01:46:04] Oh, I'm not an animal.

[01:46:05] I'm well above the monkeys.

[01:46:07] And I don't know why I attribute a British accent other than, like, that's where modern history started for America.

[01:46:16] Sure.

[01:46:17] You know?

[01:46:17] Okay.

[01:46:17] Yeah.

[01:46:18] Like, all the British coming over, you know?

[01:46:21] Right.

[01:46:21] French are involved, too.

[01:46:22] I don't know.

[01:46:23] Okay.

[01:46:23] But we don't attribute anything to the French except for the Statue of Liberty over here in America.

[01:46:30] Well, in colloquial speech.

[01:46:34] Yes.

[01:46:34] Yes.

[01:46:34] Yes.

[01:46:34] That's what I mean.

[01:46:35] That is very true.

[01:46:35] Yes.

[01:46:36] Having said that, I would love to visit France.

[01:46:39] Oh, I would do.

[01:46:40] We're not, like, anti-France here.

[01:46:42] Yeah.

[01:46:42] If we've got any fans over there that really want us to come speak, please hit us up.

[01:46:45] Yes.

[01:46:46] For sure.

[01:46:46] For sure.

[01:46:48] All right.

[01:46:49] Get back to the topic at hand.

[01:46:50] Yeah.

[01:46:51] While the specific documentation of locusts in Israel itself is scarce in ancient non-biblical texts,

[01:46:58] it's clear that locust invasions were a recurring threat in the region for millennia due to its geographic location and climate.

[01:47:07] Right.

[01:47:08] Modern pest control measures and monitoring systems help reduce the impact compared to ancient times.

[01:47:15] Right.

[01:47:15] Now, it has been suggested that this may be a double prophecy.

[01:47:21] Okay.

[01:47:22] Okay.

[01:47:23] Like, not just the bugs, right?

[01:47:24] Yeah.

[01:47:25] And that in alluding to the locusts, the destruction by the Chaldeans may also be intended.

[01:47:33] But the Chaldeans were part of the Babylonian, which would put us in a different time frame.

[01:47:37] Right.

[01:47:37] Than what we were just talking about.

[01:47:39] And that's how we're going full circle on this thing.

[01:47:41] Okay.

[01:47:42] Let me finish my sentence here.

[01:47:44] The destruction by the Chaldeans may also be intended.

[01:47:47] And the four kinds of locusts mentioned, because remember there were like the four stages,

[01:47:52] may mean the four several attacks made on Judea by them.

[01:47:57] So, it would have been number one in the last year of Nebuchadnezzar.

[01:48:01] I'm sorry, Nebuchadnezzar, the father of Nebuchadnezzar.

[01:48:05] Okay.

[01:48:06] Number two, when Joachim was taken prisoner in the 11th year of his reign.

[01:48:12] Number three, in the ninth year of Zedekiah.

[01:48:15] And number four, three years after that, when Jerusalem was destroyed by Nebuchadnezzar.

[01:48:21] Right.

[01:48:22] Okay.

[01:48:22] Yeah.

[01:48:23] Others, even more, see there's lots of suppositions about when all this happened.

[01:48:28] Because it's not clear.

[01:48:29] Right.

[01:48:29] And what all they meant by the locusts.

[01:48:31] Right.

[01:48:31] Okay.

[01:48:32] Others say that they mean four powers, which may have been enemies of the Jews.

[01:48:37] Number one, the Palmer worm would have been the Assyrians and Chaldeans.

[01:48:42] Now, the interpretation, the translation that we read did not break down the four different stages.

[01:48:49] They were all referred to as locusts.

[01:48:51] Okay.

[01:48:51] Like the chewers and the slurpers and the whatever.

[01:48:54] Sure, sure, sure.

[01:48:54] But in other translations, they refer to them as different worms or different bugs.

[01:49:00] Got it.

[01:49:00] Okay.

[01:49:01] Okay.

[01:49:01] All right.

[01:49:01] But most people agree that that is not correct.

[01:49:05] That it was the different stages of life of one locust.

[01:49:11] Sure.

[01:49:11] Okay.

[01:49:12] Yeah.

[01:49:12] So number one would have been the Palmer worm, and that would have represented the Assyrians

[01:49:17] and Chaldeans.

[01:49:18] Number two would have been the locust, which would have represented the Persians and Medes.

[01:49:23] Number three was the canker worm, which would have represented the Greeks and particularly

[01:49:28] Antiochus Epiphanes.

[01:49:30] Okay.

[01:49:30] And number four, the caterpillar would have represented the Romans.

[01:49:34] Interesting.

[01:49:34] So that's actually referring to the Chaldeans and the Assyrians are separate from the Babylonian

[01:49:41] exiles.

[01:49:42] So maybe we are talking about back during the Assyrian conquest of Israel.

[01:49:46] Who knows?

[01:49:47] Right?

[01:49:47] Right.

[01:49:48] And maybe the Chaldeans, because I remember the Chaldeans were conquered by Babylon and

[01:49:52] brought into their camp when that happened.

[01:49:55] So if we're talking about the Assyrians and Chaldeans together as one, this might be a

[01:50:00] different timeframe we're discussing.

[01:50:01] Right?

[01:50:01] Right.

[01:50:01] This might be the earlier Assyrian influence where the northern tribes got taken over by

[01:50:06] Assyria.

[01:50:07] Exactly.

[01:50:07] Which lines up with them calling them locusts.

[01:50:10] Exactly.

[01:50:11] So.

[01:50:12] Yeah.

[01:50:12] It's just so interesting that we can't decide what it means, though.

[01:50:15] No.

[01:50:16] Yeah.

[01:50:16] And that's part of what I find intriguing about reading through all this stuff and

[01:50:20] kind of these breakdowns that we do.

[01:50:22] We're not experts.

[01:50:23] Hell no.

[01:50:24] I don't want anybody to take away from our Q&As or our wrap-ups that we are presenting 100%

[01:50:30] fact on these things.

[01:50:31] Oh, no.

[01:50:32] This is all.

[01:50:32] We are giving our best guesses.

[01:50:34] This is all opinion and silly guesses.

[01:50:37] Yeah.

[01:50:38] Based on the bare minimum of research that we've put into it.

[01:50:42] Well, which is more than a lot of people do.

[01:50:43] Sure.

[01:50:44] You know.

[01:50:44] Yeah.

[01:50:44] No.

[01:50:44] I don't want to discount it, but I also don't want anybody thinking that, like.

[01:50:48] We sure as hell don't have a research team sitting in our basement.

[01:50:51] Yeah.

[01:50:51] Yeah.

[01:50:51] No.

[01:50:51] This is just me, like, fucking around on the internet.

[01:50:54] Right.

[01:50:55] This is what I found.

[01:50:55] Yeah.

[01:50:56] There's one more that I wanted to present.

[01:50:58] Why you fucked around and found out?

[01:51:00] I did.

[01:51:00] I fucked around and then I found out.

[01:51:03] Yeah.

[01:51:04] Thank you for that.

[01:51:05] Yeah.

[01:51:05] I fucked around and found out.

[01:51:06] Yeah.

[01:51:07] There's one more suggestion, though.

[01:51:09] Others make them for kings.

[01:51:12] Tiglath-Pilesar, Shalman-Essar, Sinesherab, and, of course, Nebuchadnezzar.

[01:51:18] Okay.

[01:51:19] So any of those kind of make sense.

[01:51:22] Sure.

[01:51:22] I have zero problem with any of them, but I do like the earliest, the 835 BCE.

[01:51:29] That tracks best to me.

[01:51:31] I do, too.

[01:51:32] And mostly because of the reference to Israel as a whole.

[01:51:36] And that's prior to the fall of any of it.

[01:51:38] Exactly.

[01:51:39] Exactly.

[01:51:39] So that makes a lot of sense.

[01:51:41] And we are going to talk a little bit more about locusts in a little bit when we get into,

[01:51:46] I think, chapter three, maybe.

[01:51:48] Okay.

[01:51:48] So, you know, just hold on to that thought.

[01:51:51] Yeah.

[01:51:51] Okay?

[01:51:51] All right.

[01:51:52] Now we're moving into chapter one, though.

[01:51:54] And I'm going to start with verse.

[01:51:57] I said chapter one, but I meant, no, yeah, chapter.

[01:52:00] That's right.

[01:52:01] Yeah.

[01:52:01] All right.

[01:52:02] Sorry.

[01:52:02] I got confused for a minute.

[01:52:03] No, I just, I realized we've already been talking for 23 minutes and you just said chapter

[01:52:07] one and I'm like, whoa, shit.

[01:52:09] Yeah, no, that was just like talking about the book as a whole.

[01:52:11] Okay.

[01:52:12] All right.

[01:52:12] Because don't forget, this is like got a little bit of Q&A in addition to it, just being like

[01:52:17] wrapping it up.

[01:52:18] Yeah.

[01:52:19] I got it.

[01:52:19] Okay.

[01:52:19] So in chapter one, I wanted to mention verse eight, which is mourn like a virgin in sackcloth

[01:52:26] grieving for the betrothed of her youth.

[01:52:29] And we were like, what?

[01:52:30] What does that mean?

[01:52:31] Do you remember that?

[01:52:33] We were like, why is a virgin mourning and grieving her betrothed of her youth?

[01:52:39] She's a virgin.

[01:52:40] I don't recall that.

[01:52:41] We did.

[01:52:41] We did.

[01:52:42] No, no, no.

[01:52:42] I'm sure you're right.

[01:52:43] We were like, that makes no fucking sense.

[01:52:45] Okay.

[01:52:45] All right.

[01:52:45] Because a virgin is not what?

[01:52:49] Yeah.

[01:52:49] Actually, though, it makes sense that we questioned it because the word virgin is actually a bad

[01:52:55] translation there.

[01:52:56] Oh.

[01:52:56] The original Hebrew actually signifies a young woman or bride, not a virgin.

[01:53:02] Oh, okay.

[01:53:03] Okay.

[01:53:03] But more often than not, though, that young woman or bride would have been a virgin in

[01:53:08] those times according to the way that their society broke down.

[01:53:13] Right.

[01:53:13] Because it was very important that they be a virgin until married.

[01:53:16] Yes.

[01:53:16] Yes, obviously.

[01:53:17] But when we talk about a bride grieving for the betrothed of her youth, that makes better

[01:53:26] sense in that sentence.

[01:53:29] Oh, I see what you're saying.

[01:53:29] Okay.

[01:53:30] Okay.

[01:53:30] Yeah.

[01:53:30] I see what you're saying.

[01:53:31] Than saying a virgin.

[01:53:32] Right.

[01:53:32] Why the fuck would a virgin?

[01:53:34] It doesn't matter if a virgin.

[01:53:35] Yeah.

[01:53:36] That doesn't make sense in context.

[01:53:37] In context.

[01:53:38] Right.

[01:53:38] Exactly.

[01:53:38] Okay.

[01:53:38] So, yeah.

[01:53:39] So, I'm glad we had that question.

[01:53:41] Yeah.

[01:53:41] All right.

[01:53:42] Moving on.

[01:53:42] Let's read verse 15, which is, alas, for that day, for the day of the Lord is near.

[01:53:48] It will come like destruction from the Almighty.

[01:53:51] So, we had questions about the day of the Lord, which it was mentioned five times in the

[01:53:56] book.

[01:53:57] Right.

[01:53:57] And we're like, whoa, just in case you forget, right?

[01:54:00] Yeah.

[01:54:00] So, the day of the Lord refers to a time of divine judgment and catastrophic events,

[01:54:06] often associated with God's direct intervention in human affairs.

[01:54:10] Yeah.

[01:54:11] It is described as a day of darkness, destruction, and calamity, where God punishes the people

[01:54:17] for their sins.

[01:54:18] You know, that loving God.

[01:54:20] In the broader context of the Hebrew Bible, the day of the Lord can encompass various forms

[01:54:26] of judgment, including natural disasters, military invasions, or cosmic upheaval.

[01:54:32] Right.

[01:54:33] It is not just a single event, but rather a motif used throughout the prophetic books to

[01:54:38] convey God's judgment and the need for repentance.

[01:54:42] Always be repenting.

[01:54:43] Yeah.

[01:54:44] Because you suck.

[01:54:45] Never forget.

[01:54:45] You fucking worm.

[01:54:47] You always suck.

[01:54:48] Yeah.

[01:54:48] According to the Bible.

[01:54:49] Exactly.

[01:54:49] We always, you always, everybody always sucks.

[01:54:52] Exactly.

[01:54:53] As long as you're aware.

[01:54:54] Yeah.

[01:54:54] Okay.

[01:54:55] Okay.

[01:54:55] So, moving on to verses 19 and 20.

[01:54:58] To you, Lord, I call for fire has devoured the pastures in the wilderness and flames have

[01:55:04] burned up all the trees in the field.

[01:55:07] Even the wild animals pant for you.

[01:55:10] The streams of water have dried up and fire has devoured the pastures of the wilderness.

[01:55:16] Okay.

[01:55:17] Okay.

[01:55:17] There is a similar affecting description of the effects of a drought in Jeremiah chapter

[01:55:24] 14 verse 6.

[01:55:26] Wild donkeys stand on the barren heights and pant like jackals.

[01:55:33] Their eyes fail for lack of food.

[01:55:35] So, there must have been a drought as well as a host of locusts as some of these expressions

[01:55:40] seem to indicate such.

[01:55:42] Right.

[01:55:42] And I'll mention more of those in a little bit, but they talk a lot about heat and fire

[01:55:47] and all kinds of stuff.

[01:55:48] Sure.

[01:55:49] So, that tracks.

[01:55:50] Well, and those things could back up against each other, right?

[01:55:53] Because like the whole circumstances that lead to a locust invasion probably have certain

[01:55:59] ecological things that happen.

[01:56:01] They do.

[01:56:02] In order to make that happen.

[01:56:03] You feel the effects of the locust invasion for literal years because they've ruined the

[01:56:08] crops and made the land barren.

[01:56:11] Sure.

[01:56:11] And your animals die.

[01:56:13] So, like, it's not just it happens and then it's done.

[01:56:16] Thank goodness we can move on.

[01:56:17] Right.

[01:56:17] It happened and now we're in the aftermath, which lasts even longer.

[01:56:22] Shit sucks.

[01:56:22] Yeah.

[01:56:22] Right.

[01:56:23] It's kind of like once the hurricane in Florida passes.

[01:56:26] Yeah.

[01:56:27] It doesn't just.

[01:56:27] We don't hear a lot about them anymore.

[01:56:29] Right.

[01:56:30] The people, the survivors, the victims.

[01:56:32] But they still have to deal with the aftermath.

[01:56:34] Right.

[01:56:34] Right.

[01:56:35] And then another comparison is when people say, oh, this guy didn't die of COVID.

[01:56:42] He died of a heart attack.

[01:56:44] Right.

[01:56:44] Right.

[01:56:44] And so they have to write heart attack as cause of death.

[01:56:48] But that doesn't convey the whole picture was that the heart attack occurred as a result of what was happening around him during the COVID thing.

[01:56:59] Or that his symptoms of COVID led to a heart attack.

[01:57:02] Right.

[01:57:02] Like maybe he had long COVID and so his body was more frail than it should have been or could have been had he not had COVID.

[01:57:11] Sure.

[01:57:11] And so he had the heart attack.

[01:57:13] So did COVID kill him?

[01:57:14] Not specifically.

[01:57:16] Yeah, though.

[01:57:16] It did, though.

[01:57:17] But yeah.

[01:57:17] Right.

[01:57:17] But he didn't die of COVID.

[01:57:19] Right.

[01:57:19] So these are all just me bringing up examples of ways to remember that there's the thing and then there's the fallout of the thing.

[01:57:28] I still think we are way overdue for the Star Trek tricorders and, you know, fix it things that they have.

[01:57:36] Yes.

[01:57:36] Why don't we have those yet?

[01:57:37] I demand an explanation.

[01:57:39] Right.

[01:57:40] Please contact us immediately if you are working in these fields.

[01:57:44] Right.

[01:57:44] Thank you.

[01:57:44] Have a nice day.

[01:57:45] Yeah.

[01:57:45] All right.

[01:57:46] So let's move on to chapter two.

[01:57:47] Okay.

[01:57:48] Yeah.

[01:57:48] So in this, Joel is picturing the approaching swarms of locusts as a person in Jerusalem sees them.

[01:57:55] He compares them to an enemy army and commands the watchmen on the city wall to blow the trumpet to warn the city's inhabitants of the attack.

[01:58:04] The swarms are so thick that they look like black clouds as they sweep down over the mountains.

[01:58:09] Right.

[01:58:10] Now, I want to say something here.

[01:58:11] By the end of chapter two, when we were reading it, we were convinced that the locusts were not real and that they were just a representation of an army.

[01:58:25] By the time I got done with these notes, my opinion had changed 100%.

[01:58:31] Really?

[01:58:31] Yeah.

[01:58:32] I'm convinced that it actually was locusts.

[01:58:35] Okay.

[01:58:36] Okay.

[01:58:36] All right.

[01:58:37] They, I think that the army, particularly the Assyrians, were compared to the locusts and not vice versa.

[01:58:47] Okay.

[01:58:48] Is what I mean to say.

[01:58:48] So they experienced the locusts and then they're like, oh shit, those guys are kind of doing the same thing the locusts did to us.

[01:58:54] Those guys are almost as bad as locusts.

[01:58:56] Right.

[01:58:56] Fuck me.

[01:58:57] Yeah.

[01:58:58] So verse one reads, blow the trumpet in Zion, sound the alarm on my holy hill.

[01:59:04] Let all who live in the land tremble for the day of the Lord is coming.

[01:59:09] It is close at hand.

[01:59:11] So in Joel one, I'm sorry, in Joel chapter one, the prophet spoke of the judgment that had arrived in Judah, a plague of locusts and drought.

[01:59:20] Right.

[01:59:20] Right.

[01:59:20] Now in chapter two, he begins by describing the judgment and subsequent punishment that will come.

[01:59:27] A mighty army set against Judah.

[01:59:29] Okay.

[01:59:30] All right.

[01:59:31] So they spread over the countryside like an uncontrollable bushfire, turning healthy farmlands into barren waste.

[01:59:38] And the people were terrified.

[01:59:40] They were helpless before the onslaught of this destructive quote unquote army.

[01:59:44] Right.

[01:59:45] Right.

[01:59:45] So let's read verses four and five.

[01:59:47] They have the appearance of horses.

[01:59:49] They gallop along like cavalry with a noise like that of chariots.

[01:59:54] They leap over the mountaintops like a crackling fire, consuming stubble, like a mighty army drawn up for battle.

[02:00:03] Okay.

[02:00:03] So we are talking about bugs and comparing them.

[02:00:08] They're comparing them to an army.

[02:00:08] Yes.

[02:00:09] Right.

[02:00:09] Furthermore, let's read a little bit of explanation here.

[02:00:14] Sure.

[02:00:14] The head of a locust is remarkably like that of a horse, oblong head and bending downward.

[02:00:22] The Italians call locusts cavaletta or cavalry.

[02:00:26] Oh, interesting.

[02:00:28] Also, the locust hordes fly with a great noise and can be heard as far as six miles away.

[02:00:35] Shut the fuck up.

[02:00:37] Right.

[02:00:37] Yeah.

[02:00:38] While they are eating, the sound of them, quote, is like that of a flame driven by the wind.

[02:00:44] And that is recorded in the Ibid, which is one of the Jewish writings.

[02:00:48] Gotcha.

[02:00:49] Okay.

[02:00:49] Finally, the locusts attack Jerusalem.

[02:00:52] City walls cannot keep this enemy out as locusts swarm into the city and through the houses.

[02:00:57] Like, remember, it talked about them like climbing on the walls and like dancing in the windows and shit.

[02:01:03] And we were like, what the fuck?

[02:01:05] Yeah.

[02:01:05] Totally locusts.

[02:01:06] Yeah.

[02:01:07] And you're looking at a picture right now.

[02:01:09] Yeah.

[02:01:09] They look basically like a grasshopper or a cricket or something.

[02:01:12] But yeah.

[02:01:13] But their head is like the head of a horse, like the same shape.

[02:01:16] Right.

[02:01:16] Yeah.

[02:01:16] So, yeah.

[02:01:17] See what I mean, though?

[02:01:18] I'm completely convinced now.

[02:01:20] Oops, my bad.

[02:01:21] It was not an army.

[02:01:22] It was locusts.

[02:01:23] Sure.

[02:01:23] No, I just I never know how to take these things in the Bible, you know?

[02:01:26] Yeah.

[02:01:27] And, you know, I could be 100% wrong.

[02:01:29] I don't fucking know.

[02:01:30] Sure.

[02:01:30] I'm just saying even knowing all that we could be wrong.

[02:01:32] Sure.

[02:01:33] Right.

[02:01:33] Yeah.

[02:01:33] So the clouds of insects are so thick that they blot out the sun.

[02:01:38] Jesus.

[02:01:38] The darkness demonstrates to all that this is God's judgment and the day of the Lord is upon them.

[02:01:44] To me, it demonstrates there's a fuck ton of locusts coming at me.

[02:01:46] Yes.

[02:01:47] Yes.

[02:01:48] Exactly.

[02:01:49] All right.

[02:01:50] So verse 10 reads, before them the earth shakes, the heavens tremble, the sun and moon are darkened, and the stars no longer shine.

[02:02:00] And again, in the Ibbid, it reads, their multitude is sometimes so immense as to obscure the heavens for the space of 12 miles.

[02:02:10] Damn.

[02:02:10] Right?

[02:02:11] Wow.

[02:02:11] That's crazy.

[02:02:12] That's a lot of fucking bugs.

[02:02:14] That's a lot of fucking bugs.

[02:02:15] Right?

[02:02:15] Yeah.

[02:02:15] All right.

[02:02:16] So moving on.

[02:02:17] Although God is the one who has sent this judgment, it is not too late for the people to ask for his mercy.

[02:02:23] Oh, fuck you.

[02:02:24] Right?

[02:02:25] However, this must be accompanied by genuine inward repentance, not just by the outward show of torn clothing, sackcloth, and ashes.

[02:02:34] Yeah.

[02:02:35] Remember, it was rend your heart, not your clothes.

[02:02:39] Right.

[02:02:39] Right.

[02:02:39] Yeah.

[02:02:40] God may then restore their fields and vineyards, and they will be able to worship him with their cereal and wine offerings again.

[02:02:47] So he's not going to stop them from coming.

[02:02:49] Right.

[02:02:50] But he's going to fix their fields.

[02:02:51] Right.

[02:02:52] He'll take away the cause of it.

[02:02:54] Which would have fixed themselves eventually anyway.

[02:02:55] Right.

[02:02:56] But just to be fair here, it would have been years of recovery, and they're saying that God will take away those years.

[02:03:03] Yeah.

[02:03:03] And these things happen once every 50 to 100 years, right?

[02:03:08] So living memory of how long it takes would have been very sparse.

[02:03:12] And I call bullshit here.

[02:03:14] Sure.

[02:03:14] I think that they were looking for any reason to say, God will help us fix this.

[02:03:19] And then when it did eventually happen, they're like, God helped us fix this.

[02:03:23] Although that didn't happen.

[02:03:25] Okay.

[02:03:25] Well, fuck God then.

[02:03:27] Right?

[02:03:27] Yeah.

[02:03:28] Once more, a trumpet is blown, but this time to call the people to the temple to seek God's mercy.

[02:03:34] No one is to be excluded, not even the children.

[02:03:38] All are to fast and mourn.

[02:03:42] And even people who would normally be rejoicing and celebrating, such as those who have just been married.

[02:03:47] So everybody got to come out.

[02:03:49] Right.

[02:03:50] We got to pray this shit away.

[02:03:51] Yeah.

[02:03:51] Get these bugs out of here.

[02:03:53] Yeah.

[02:03:53] The priests gather in the temple court between the porch and the altar and lead the people in prayer.

[02:04:00] Okay?

[02:04:00] So I'm going to read verse 17 now.

[02:04:04] Let the priests who minister before the Lord weep between the portico and the altar.

[02:04:10] And I kind of remember we were like, what the fuck is even, I don't know, whatever, moving on.

[02:04:15] Right.

[02:04:15] But I came across a note, and I remember we didn't have a specific question, but we just didn't understand what that meant.

[02:04:22] But we didn't care enough to have that be a question.

[02:04:26] So here's the thing, though.

[02:04:28] And the altar of burnt offerings stood before the porch of the temple, as described in 2 Chronicles 8.

[02:04:35] And between them, there was an open space.

[02:04:39] And that's where the priests prostrated themselves or brought the sacrifice or spoke to people that were confessing sins and seeking atonement.

[02:04:47] Okay.

[02:04:48] So that's why it was like, get over there in that space between those buildings and cry, you priests.

[02:04:52] Got it.

[02:04:53] Okay.

[02:04:53] So that's what that was about.

[02:04:55] All right.

[02:04:55] So then God promises to defend his repentant people against the mighty army.

[02:05:00] And God will in due time take vengeance on all the enemies of pure and undefiled religion.

[02:05:07] God accepts the people's repentance and promises to remove the locusts.

[02:05:12] He will drive them out to perish in the desert regions to the south, in the Dead Sea to the east, and in the Mediterranean Sea to the west.

[02:05:21] Wow.

[02:05:22] Okay.

[02:05:22] He going to get them gone.

[02:05:23] Yeah.

[02:05:24] He's going to pull out his mighty cum wand.

[02:05:30] Remember in chapter 3, it says something about how he poured his spirit out on the people.

[02:05:36] And we were like, he came all over them.

[02:05:38] Okay.

[02:05:39] Yeah.

[02:05:39] Right.

[02:05:40] Yeah.

[02:05:41] His penis is like a pesticide.

[02:05:43] Oh, my God.

[02:05:44] What?

[02:05:45] Okay.

[02:05:45] Verse 20.

[02:05:46] I will drive the northern horde far from you, pushing it into a parched and barren land.

[02:05:52] Its eastern ranks will drown in the Dead Sea and its western ranks in the Mediterranean Sea.

[02:05:58] And its stench will go up.

[02:06:00] Its smell will rise.

[02:06:02] And we were like, what?

[02:06:04] I don't even, what?

[02:06:05] All of that just was so confusing.

[02:06:08] Well, here's the thing.

[02:06:08] Okay.

[02:06:09] Okay.

[02:06:09] Syria, which was northward of Judea, was infested with locusts.

[02:06:13] And it must have been a northern wind that brought them into Judea in the time of Joel.

[02:06:18] Oh, okay.

[02:06:19] As God promises to change this wind and carry them into a barren and desolate land.

[02:06:25] I see.

[02:06:26] Okay.

[02:06:26] After having been drowned by millions in the Mediterranean, the reflux of the tide would often bring the bugs back.

[02:06:35] Oh.

[02:06:35] And throw them in heaps upon the shore where they putrefied in the heat, infected the air, and produced pestilence by which both men and cattle died in great multitudes.

[02:06:47] Yeah.

[02:06:48] That's horrible.

[02:06:50] Right?

[02:06:50] Yeah.

[02:06:51] Shit.

[02:06:51] It was nasty.

[02:06:52] Yeah.

[02:06:52] So, again, there's other sources that verify this shit, not just the Bible.

[02:06:59] Right.

[02:07:00] St. Augustine and many others after him related that there was such an immense crowd of locusts in Africa that, having eaten up every green thing, a wind arose that carried them into the sea where they perished.

[02:07:15] But being cast upon the shore, they putrefied and bred such a pestilence that 80,000 men died of it in the kingdom of Manasseh.

[02:07:24] Good God.

[02:07:25] And 30,000 in the garrison of Utica, in which only 10 remained alive.

[02:07:31] That's crazy.

[02:07:32] Yeah.

[02:07:32] So, these bugs are like...

[02:07:35] They're nothing to fuck around with.

[02:07:36] Yeah.

[02:07:36] They are like no joke.

[02:07:38] Yeah.

[02:07:39] So, again, I'm convinced that we're talking about bugs now.

[02:07:43] Sure.

[02:07:44] Okay?

[02:07:44] No, yeah.

[02:07:45] Yeah.

[02:07:46] You see why I would think that?

[02:07:48] Yeah, I do.

[02:07:48] I do.

[02:07:48] Okay.

[02:07:49] Okay.

[02:07:49] Are you with me, or what do you think?

[02:07:51] I'm with you.

[02:07:52] I just...

[02:07:53] I'm struggling with the...

[02:07:55] Like, if we're taking the Bible as a continuous book of knowledge, right?

[02:08:01] As a recording of God's word, right?

[02:08:04] Mm-hmm.

[02:08:05] It's really fucking confusing.

[02:08:07] Yeah.

[02:08:07] Because in one breath, they'll talk about the Assyrians as locusts.

[02:08:10] Mm-hmm.

[02:08:11] In the next breath, we're talking about locusts as locusts.

[02:08:13] Right.

[02:08:13] Right?

[02:08:13] Yeah.

[02:08:14] There's no continuity.

[02:08:15] There's no way to tell we're talking about this or that because of...

[02:08:19] And you have to...

[02:08:20] Because their phrasing is not just metaphor.

[02:08:23] It's like hard metaphor.

[02:08:25] Right.

[02:08:25] When you have to dig so far into this, and it's about...

[02:08:28] You're digging into ancient times to discern meaning from places that we're not even sure

[02:08:34] that we're talking about the right time.

[02:08:36] Right.

[02:08:37] Right?

[02:08:37] Yeah.

[02:08:37] So it's so hard to figure out what these folks meant when they were writing this.

[02:08:42] Mm-hmm.

[02:08:43] And it was people that were writing this, you know?

[02:08:45] But we no longer can understand what they meant because we're not in that time.

[02:08:53] We're not in that place to understand what they were talking about.

[02:08:56] Mm-hmm.

[02:08:57] And so we just have to take our best guesses.

[02:08:59] Even the most studied, you know, theologians don't know exact answers all the time.

[02:09:04] Right.

[02:09:04] You know?

[02:09:05] Right.

[02:09:05] And it's just a...

[02:09:06] That's why we can contribute some.

[02:09:08] Right?

[02:09:09] That's why we can offer something to this conversation because no one really fucking knows.

[02:09:13] Exactly.

[02:09:14] You know?

[02:09:15] Yeah.

[02:09:15] So great prosperity of the Jews subsequent to their return from the Babylonish captivity

[02:09:21] is what we're about to get into, okay?

[02:09:23] Okay.

[02:09:24] There may be some unpleasantness at first because of the smell from the millions of decaying

[02:09:30] locust curcasses, some lying in heaps on the ground and others washed up on the shores.

[02:09:35] But after this, the land will become productive again.

[02:09:38] And then God will give good rains and good harvests to compensate for the losses suffered

[02:09:44] during the locust plague.

[02:09:46] That's nice of God.

[02:09:47] Yeah.

[02:09:48] Yeah.

[02:09:48] Yeah.

[02:09:48] This whole experience of judgment, repentance, forgiveness, blessing, and thanksgiving will

[02:09:54] cause them to know God better.

[02:09:56] You know, I have to say, I would hate to live in these times because when shit starts going

[02:10:01] wrong for just no reason other than nature, right, then these godly people start getting

[02:10:08] blamed.

[02:10:09] They start blaming people for not worshiping God enough, right?

[02:10:12] Or the right God or whatever.

[02:10:14] And I'm betting that a lot of shit went down between people during these time frames because

[02:10:20] you don't worship God hard enough or you don't do this enough or whatever.

[02:10:24] Yeah.

[02:10:24] You're praying the wrong way.

[02:10:25] You're praying to the wrong God.

[02:10:27] But there's no God, right?

[02:10:28] Yeah.

[02:10:28] So they're just getting fucked over because some goddamn locusts invaded and there's nothing

[02:10:33] you can do about it in ancient times because there wasn't pesticides.

[02:10:35] There wasn't ways to remedy the problem.

[02:10:38] Right.

[02:10:38] And so people got blamed for being not godly enough and probably, you know, disowned or

[02:10:43] banished or all kinds.

[02:10:44] Who knows what all fucking happened, right?

[02:10:46] Right.

[02:10:46] But shit went down because nature happened.

[02:10:50] And to me, that's just all kinds of fucked up.

[02:10:53] It's tragic.

[02:10:54] Yeah.

[02:10:54] So Joel then makes an elegant transition on the outpouring of the Holy Ghost on the day

[02:11:00] of Pentecost.

[02:11:01] And that's when, you know, he came all over the people.

[02:11:03] Ah, yeah, yeah.

[02:11:04] Okay.

[02:11:04] And now we're going to get into the prophecy concerning the destruction of Jerusalem.

[02:11:09] Okay.

[02:11:09] And the promises of safety to the faithful and penitent.

[02:11:13] Okay.

[02:11:13] All of this must happen before the final great day of the Lord dawns.

[02:11:18] Okay.

[02:11:18] The darkness and terror of the locust plague is only a faint picture of the horror of

[02:11:25] that last great judgment.

[02:11:27] Ah.

[02:11:27] On that day, believers will be saved, but sinners will perish.

[02:11:33] Hmm.

[02:11:33] Hmm.

[02:11:34] That's sad.

[02:11:35] Womp womp.

[02:11:36] All right.

[02:11:36] Now we're getting into chapter three.

[02:11:38] Right.

[02:11:38] Ready?

[02:11:39] If that happened, why is there generationally just like a shit ton of fucking sinners in

[02:11:45] Israel and in this Bible story?

[02:11:48] Right.

[02:11:48] Right.

[02:11:49] If you kill them all so often, because it does happen quite often.

[02:11:52] It does.

[02:11:53] Then why aren't they mostly gone, you know, by the next generation?

[02:11:57] They're not.

[02:11:57] They're not gone.

[02:11:58] At all.

[02:11:59] Yeah.

[02:11:59] Yeah.

[02:12:00] Some people die and you're like.

[02:12:01] It's almost like God is bad at math.

[02:12:04] It's almost like God doesn't, you know, exist.

[02:12:07] Right.

[02:12:07] But also, if he did, he really sucks at discerning who is sinful and who's not.

[02:12:12] Yeah.

[02:12:13] So.

[02:12:13] I agree.

[02:12:14] Mm-hmm.

[02:12:15] So Joel pictures enemy nations gathering for a last attack on Jerusalem.

[02:12:20] But these nations do not realize that God is the one who has brought them together.

[02:12:25] He is now going to execute his judgment, God is, upon them for their crimes against Judah.

[02:12:32] Chief among these crimes are their seizure of Judah's territory and their treatment of Judah

[02:12:37] his people, whether in driving them into other countries or in selling them as slaves.

[02:12:43] I would like to point out that God told them to do this.

[02:12:46] Sometimes he did.

[02:12:48] Other times.

[02:12:49] Well, he claimed them as his armies.

[02:12:50] Like, he claimed them as his.

[02:12:52] Okay, okay.

[02:12:53] Whatever.

[02:12:53] Regardless of sometimes or not, some of these armies, some of these people, sometimes God

[02:12:58] told them to do this and he's still punishing the fuckers.

[02:13:00] Yes.

[02:13:00] That's bullshit.

[02:13:01] Well, the argument that the priests or whatever would make is that, no, they were going to

[02:13:07] do bad things anyway, but God used them as his tool to better sharpen his people.

[02:13:15] Okay.

[02:13:16] Yeah.

[02:13:16] It's a very mealy-mouthed argument.

[02:13:19] If they were going to do it anyway, then you didn't actually use them as a tool.

[02:13:22] They were already going to do it.

[02:13:23] And those are two different things.

[02:13:26] You can argue, if you want to, as an apologist, that these people were already going to do

[02:13:30] the things that they were going to do.

[02:13:31] But if that's the case, then God didn't use them for shit.

[02:13:34] Right.

[02:13:35] They were just going to do what they were going to do.

[02:13:36] No, I'm with you.

[02:13:37] Now, if we're to accept that the word of the God is in the Bible and that these statements

[02:13:43] where they say God says and God does and whatever are true, if we're to accept that,

[02:13:49] then we're accepting the fact that these were God's armies.

[02:13:51] These were God's tools.

[02:13:52] These were God's actions.

[02:13:55] Right?

[02:13:55] And then the fact that he is.

[02:13:58] So if we're accepting that fact, if we're accepting what is in the Bible as written word

[02:14:02] in the Bible as fact, then these people are not responsible for what they did.

[02:14:07] And yet he's going to punish them, which he means kill them.

[02:14:11] Kill or sell them into slavery.

[02:14:13] Right.

[02:14:14] Right.

[02:14:14] Which is what this time is what they do.

[02:14:16] I understand that apologists have to make excuses for the shitty actions of God.

[02:14:21] And I guess I kind of feel bad.

[02:14:24] I mean, like, he is so shitty.

[02:14:26] Yeah.

[02:14:26] So there's a lot of apologizing that you have to do.

[02:14:29] Exactly.

[02:14:29] But don't be disingenuous here.

[02:14:32] Like, you are telling me something that...

[02:14:36] Okay.

[02:14:37] There's no reason why God would make somebody do something who was already going to do it.

[02:14:43] Right.

[02:14:44] That's bullshit.

[02:14:45] Right.

[02:14:45] That's just bullshit.

[02:14:46] It's not logical.

[02:14:47] It doesn't make any sense.

[02:14:48] Right.

[02:14:48] Right.

[02:14:48] All right.

[02:14:49] But let's read some verses of chapter 3.

[02:14:52] Okay.

[02:14:52] All right.

[02:14:53] Yeah.

[02:14:53] Verses 1 and 2.

[02:14:54] In those days and at that time...

[02:14:57] Yeah.

[02:14:57] ...when I restore the fortunes of Judah and Jerusalem, I will gather all nations and bring them down

[02:15:03] to the valley of Jehoshaphat.

[02:15:05] Right.

[02:15:05] There I will put them on trial for what they did to my inheritance, my people Israel,

[02:15:11] because they scattered my people among the nations and divided up my land.

[02:15:16] Okay.

[02:15:18] Okay.

[02:15:18] Okay.

[02:15:18] But again, you know, based on what was said prior to this, he made them do this.

[02:15:24] Right.

[02:15:25] So I just wanted to point that out one more time.

[02:15:27] One more time, because you haven't said it enough.

[02:15:29] No, I know.

[02:15:30] I know.

[02:15:31] I just...

[02:15:32] It's one of those things I feel needs to be reiterated because the apologists will say

[02:15:36] otherwise.

[02:15:37] Yes.

[02:15:37] They will make it seem otherwise.

[02:15:40] So an apologist, speaking of...

[02:15:43] Yeah.

[02:15:43] Yeah.

[02:15:43] It says, in a lesser and immediate sense, this was fulfilled in the return from the

[02:15:49] Babylonian exile.

[02:15:51] But in the greater and ultimate sense, it will be fulfilled in the end times regathering of

[02:15:57] Israel to the point where an expectant Israel welcomes Jesus and salvation comes to Israel

[02:16:04] as a whole.

[02:16:05] So what they're saying is, we don't have a fucking clue what he's talking about.

[02:16:09] We don't give a shit moreover.

[02:16:11] And it can apply to whatever the fuck you want it to apply to.

[02:16:13] Yeah.

[02:16:13] And we really like the idea of God's chosen people, but also become Christian.

[02:16:21] Yeah.

[02:16:21] Huh?

[02:16:21] Huh?

[02:16:22] Huh?

[02:16:22] Oh, yeah.

[02:16:22] Yeah.

[02:16:22] They love that.

[02:16:23] That's the best.

[02:16:24] Right?

[02:16:24] Right.

[02:16:25] So Joel here describes the final gathering of the nations in rebellion against God at

[02:16:31] the Battle of Armageddon.

[02:16:32] There is no place in Israel known as the Valley of Jehoshaphat.

[02:16:37] Okay.

[02:16:37] But the name Jehoshaphat means the Lord judges.

[02:16:42] It describes God's place of judgment.

[02:16:45] Got it.

[02:16:46] Yeah.

[02:16:46] For behold, in those days, right?

[02:16:49] Like in that time, in those days.

[02:16:51] Right.

[02:16:51] According to the preceding prophecy, the one before that, these days should refer to gospel

[02:16:57] times or to such as should immediately precede them.

[02:17:01] So, yeah.

[02:17:02] Okay.

[02:17:03] But this is a part of the prophecy, which is difficult to understand.

[02:17:06] Go figure.

[02:17:07] There's all kinds of arguments as to what it fucking means.

[02:17:10] Let's read a few of the ideas.

[02:17:12] Okay.

[02:17:13] All right.

[02:17:13] That seriously oppose each other.

[02:17:15] Sure.

[02:17:15] Okay.

[02:17:15] All interpreters are at variance upon it.

[02:17:19] Some applying its principal parts to cambuses.

[02:17:23] And I'll tell you more about who the fuck that guy is.

[02:17:26] Okay.

[02:17:27] Yeah.

[02:17:27] In a minute here.

[02:17:28] Sure.

[02:17:28] His unfortunate expedition to Egypt, the destruction of 50,000 of his troops by the moving pillars

[02:17:35] of sand whom he had sent across the desert to plunder the rich temple of Jupiter Ammon,

[02:17:40] his return to Judea, and dying of a wound which he received from his own sword in mounting his horse, which happened at the foot of Mount Carmel.

[02:17:51] Okay.

[02:17:52] Okay.

[02:17:52] On which his army, composed of different nations, seeing themselves without a head, fell out and fought against each other till the whole were destroyed.

[02:18:00] Okay.

[02:18:01] Okay.

[02:18:02] Okay.

[02:18:02] Okay.

[02:18:02] So this is okay.

[02:18:03] I'm lost a little bit.

[02:18:05] Like what?

[02:18:05] What's happening?

[02:18:06] Okay.

[02:18:06] So when we say gospel times, what we're talking about is the times of Jesus and his disciples.

[02:18:12] Oh, okay.

[02:18:13] So this is Christian apologists for sure.

[02:18:15] Yes.

[02:18:15] Yes.

[02:18:16] Okay.

[02:18:16] So that's what we mean by gospels.

[02:18:19] I thought you would jump there, but I wasn't really sure.

[02:18:21] Right.

[02:18:21] So some people, apologists, like who study the Bible hard, right?

[02:18:26] They're saying that this particular prophecy where God is going to gather them in the Valley of Jehoshaphat, meaning the Valley of God's judgment.

[02:18:37] Yeah.

[02:18:39] It already happened.

[02:18:40] It fell during the time of the gospel, during the time of Jesus.

[02:18:45] Got it.

[02:18:46] Okay.

[02:18:46] Okay.

[02:18:46] Or preceding, like leading up to Jesus.

[02:18:50] Sure.

[02:18:50] Okay.

[02:18:51] So, but this is a part of the prophecy, which, oh, I already read that.

[02:18:54] So, okay, let's talk about who the fuck was Cambyses again now.

[02:18:57] Sure.

[02:18:57] Apparently he was a leader who killed himself accidentally with a sword.

[02:19:01] All right.

[02:19:01] Okay.

[02:19:02] Yeah.

[02:19:02] So he was the son and successor of Cyrus the Great.

[02:19:06] Oh.

[02:19:07] Who ruled from 550 to 530 BCE.

[02:19:11] Right.

[02:19:11] And as I recall, Cyrus the Great was the one that let the Israelites go back to their homeland.

[02:19:16] Sure.

[02:19:17] Okay.

[02:19:17] Before his accession, Cambyses had briefly served as the governor of northern Babylonia under his father from April to December 538 BCE.

[02:19:28] Afterwards, he resided in the Babylonian cities of Babylon and Sippar before being appointed by his father as co-ruler in 530 BCE.

[02:19:38] I recall this, actually.

[02:19:39] We covered this.

[02:19:40] But I didn't remember his name.

[02:19:42] I didn't either.

[02:19:42] I didn't either.

[02:19:43] And I'm not sure that we learned his name at that time.

[02:19:45] Probably not.

[02:19:46] But I do remember we were talking about, oh, it was nice he took off with this impending, you know, war that was going to happen.

[02:19:51] Exactly.

[02:19:52] So his father then set off on an expedition against the Masagitae of Central Asia.

[02:20:00] Yeah.

[02:20:01] Where he met his end.

[02:20:02] Oops.

[02:20:03] Womp womp.

[02:20:03] Okay.

[02:20:04] Poor Cyrus.

[02:20:04] Right.

[02:20:05] Cambyses thus became the sole ruler of the vast Akhamanid Empire, meaning the Greeks.

[02:20:12] Sure.

[02:20:12] Facing no reported opposition.

[02:20:15] Okay.

[02:20:15] Okay.

[02:20:16] Yeah.

[02:20:16] His relatively brief reign was marked by his conquests in North Africa, notably Egypt, which he conquered after his victory over the Egyptian pharaoh Samtik III around 526 to 525 BCE at the Battle of Pelusium in 525 BCE.

[02:20:37] Okay.

[02:20:37] Okay.

[02:20:37] After having established himself in Egypt, he expanded the empire's holdings in Africa, including the conquest of Cyrenaica.

[02:20:46] In the spring of 522 BCE, Cambyses hurriedly left Egypt to deal with a rebellion in Persia.

[02:20:54] Okay.

[02:20:54] And this is where he's about to hurt himself.

[02:20:55] While en route to Syria, he received a wound to the thigh, which was soon affected by gangrene.

[02:21:03] Cambyses died three weeks later.

[02:21:06] Oopsie.

[02:21:07] And this is supposed to be what Ezekiel means by Gog and Magog.

[02:21:11] Okay.

[02:21:12] And the destruction of the former.

[02:21:14] That's where we talked about it.

[02:21:16] Others, though, going back to theories about what the fuck.

[02:21:19] Sure.

[02:21:20] Okay.

[02:21:20] God's judgment and, you know, all that.

[02:21:23] Yeah.

[02:21:23] Others apply this to the victories gained by the Maccabees, whom we haven't read yet.

[02:21:28] Right.

[02:21:29] But we did read a little bit about them.

[02:21:30] We read about them.

[02:21:31] Yeah.

[02:21:31] Yeah.

[02:21:32] And to the destruction brought upon the enemies of their country.

[02:21:35] While several consider the whole instead as a figurative prediction of the success of the gospel among the nations of the earth.

[02:21:45] So back to Jesus.

[02:21:46] Okay.

[02:21:47] Yeah.

[02:21:47] Yeah.

[02:21:47] It may instead.

[02:21:51] Your face.

[02:21:52] You're like, oh, my God.

[02:21:53] Like, okay, look.

[02:21:55] We're reading something from the Old Testament, right?

[02:21:56] Yeah.

[02:21:57] Yeah.

[02:21:57] These Jewish people had no fucking clue if this was ever going to get compared to any of this.

[02:22:01] Right.

[02:22:01] It has no relevance, really.

[02:22:03] Christian apologists love to tie everything to the New Testament.

[02:22:06] And it's just like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[02:22:10] You know, I, to me, this is so absurd.

[02:22:13] Yeah.

[02:22:14] You know, they're just trying to ascribe meaning to things that really don't have any meaning.

[02:22:18] Sometimes.

[02:22:19] Yeah.

[02:22:19] And when I'm listening to it, I'm like, and here's an excuse.

[02:22:22] And there's a reason.

[02:22:23] And there's like, they're just making shit up on the fly and attributing it to whatever the fuck they want to.

[02:22:29] Whatever.

[02:22:30] So it may instead, again, refer to those times in which the Jews shall be brought in with the fullness of the Gentiles and be reestablished in their own land.

[02:22:42] That's very exciting.

[02:22:43] Yeah.

[02:22:43] Or there may be portions in this prophecy that refer to all the events and to others that have not even fallen yet within the range of human conjecture.

[02:22:54] That's so convenient.

[02:22:55] And will only be known when the time of fulfillment shall take place.

[02:22:59] Yeah.

[02:22:59] Right.

[02:23:00] That time.

[02:23:00] Yeah.

[02:23:01] Sure.

[02:23:01] Okay.

[02:23:01] All right.

[02:23:02] So moving on, though.

[02:23:03] Right.

[02:23:04] Okay.

[02:23:04] Yeah.

[02:23:04] So God warns the nations that he will retaliate against those people who have mistreated his people.

[02:23:10] Tyre, Sidon, and Philistia are examples of those nations that fought with Judah, plundered the Jerusalem temple, and sold the people into slavery.

[02:23:21] Sure.

[02:23:21] In punishment, God will now treat them as they treated Judah.

[02:23:24] Remember, we were like, oh, so he's a vengeful little bitch.

[02:23:27] Right.

[02:23:28] Right.

[02:23:28] Okay.

[02:23:29] So let's read verse 7.

[02:23:31] See, I'm going to rouse them out of the places to which you sold them, and I will return on your own heads what you have done.

[02:23:41] Remember, we were like, oh, I hate you so much.

[02:23:44] Well, yeah.

[02:23:44] I mean, that's a petty God.

[02:23:46] But okay.

[02:23:47] Yeah.

[02:23:47] So it is said that Alexander and his successors set at liberty many Jews that had been sold into Greece.

[02:23:55] And it is likely that many returned from different lands on the publication of the Edict of Cyrus.

[02:24:02] Okay.

[02:24:03] Like, remember?

[02:24:03] Yeah.

[02:24:04] We talked about how, yay, you're welcome to come home now.

[02:24:07] Right.

[02:24:07] They even kind of liked Cyrus.

[02:24:09] And before that, they liked Alexander the Great for some reason.

[02:24:12] Right.

[02:24:12] Remember?

[02:24:13] And we learned about that in the Jewish fairy tales book.

[02:24:16] Yeah.

[02:24:16] Okay.

[02:24:17] So verse 8 reads,

[02:24:19] I will sell your sons and daughters to the people of Judah, and they will sell them to the Sabians, a nation far away.

[02:24:26] The Lord has spoken.

[02:24:27] So when Alexander the Great took Tyre, he reduced into slavery all the lower people and the women.

[02:24:37] Arian, this guy that wrote in a bunch of the early, what am I trying to say, Jewish texts?

[02:24:45] Okay.

[02:24:45] Like the writings is, says that 30,000 of them were sold.

[02:24:50] Our Tisirce's Ocas destroyed Sidon and subdued the other cities of Phoenicia.

[02:24:58] In all these wars, the Jews who obeyed the Persians did not neglect to purchase Phoenician slaves whom they sold again to the Sabians or Arabs.

[02:25:08] Okay.

[02:25:09] So they're saying fulfilled.

[02:25:10] Got it.

[02:25:11] Okay.

[02:25:11] Yeah.

[02:25:12] So let's move on.

[02:25:13] Okay.

[02:25:13] All right.

[02:25:15] Returning to the picture of nations gathering for war in the valley outside Jerusalem, Joel, the prophet, ironically urges the enemy armies to make full preparation for the battle.

[02:25:28] He then calls upon God to send down his angelic armies to be ready to carry out his sentence of judgment upon the enemy.

[02:25:37] I'm like, well, I don't really remember that.

[02:25:39] So let's read a verse.

[02:25:41] Let's read verses nine and 10.

[02:25:43] Proclaim this among the nations.

[02:25:45] Prepare for war.

[02:25:46] Rouse the warriors.

[02:25:47] Let all the fighting men draw near and attack.

[02:25:50] Beat your plowshares into swords.

[02:25:53] Right.

[02:25:53] And your pruning hooks into spears.

[02:25:56] Let the weakling say, I am strong.

[02:25:59] Yeah.

[02:26:00] So God challenged the nations to prepare for war against him.

[02:26:03] Basically, he's saying if you're going to go into battle against God, you should have every weapon available because you're going to lose.

[02:26:09] But go ahead.

[02:26:10] Fight your best.

[02:26:11] Okay.

[02:26:11] Okay.

[02:26:12] So God's moment of decision comes and he announces his verdict on the nations.

[02:26:16] They are guilty.

[02:26:18] Of course.

[02:26:18] Their wickedness is great.

[02:26:19] Yeah.

[02:26:20] And therefore they must die.

[02:26:21] Of course.

[02:26:24] I saw that coming.

[02:26:25] There's the story of the Bible.

[02:26:27] Right.

[02:26:27] Pretty much.

[02:26:28] Yeah.

[02:26:28] They are cut down like grapes from a vine.

[02:26:31] Their blood flows like grape juice overflowing a wine press.

[02:26:35] Jesus.

[02:26:35] The valley of God's judgment is filled with the bodies of dead soldiers.

[02:26:40] Such a loving God.

[02:26:41] I love this guy.

[02:26:42] It's just amazing, isn't it?

[02:26:43] Yeah.

[02:26:43] The amount of love that pours out from him.

[02:26:46] Mm-hmm.

[02:26:46] Mm-hmm.

[02:26:47] Yeah.

[02:26:47] Yeah.

[02:26:48] So let's read verse 15.

[02:26:49] Mm-hmm.

[02:26:50] The sun and moon will be darkened and the stars no longer shine.

[02:26:54] Here's the thing.

[02:26:55] High and mighty states shall be eclipsed and brought to ruin.

[02:26:59] And the stars, petty states, princes, and governors shall withdraw their shining, withhold their influence and tribute from the kingdoms to which they have belonged, and set up themselves as independent governors.

[02:27:13] Okay.

[02:27:14] So there are different scholars that are like, yeah, that is just a metaphor.

[02:27:22] Yeah.

[02:27:22] Like, you know, the stars will stop shining.

[02:27:25] It's just like the people.

[02:27:27] They're just.

[02:27:28] The Hollywood celebrities.

[02:27:31] It's the drama.

[02:27:32] Will fall.

[02:27:33] Yeah.

[02:27:33] Right.

[02:27:33] Yeah.

[02:27:34] Those stars.

[02:27:35] Sure.

[02:27:35] Sure.

[02:27:36] Yeah.

[02:27:36] The time of God's judgment on his enemies is also the time of his deliverance of Jerusalem.

[02:27:41] He protects his people from punishment, purifies them from uncleanness, and gives them peace and prosperity.

[02:27:48] Pretty.

[02:27:50] Having punished all enemies, symbolized here by Egypt and Edom, God now dwells among his people forever.

[02:27:58] Right after he killed them.

[02:27:59] Punished his enemies.

[02:28:00] Mm-hmm.

[02:28:01] But before that, he punished the Israelites.

[02:28:03] Mm-hmm.

[02:28:04] And then prior to that, he punished his enemies.

[02:28:06] And before that, he punished the Israelites.

[02:28:08] And then after that, he punished the Israelites.

[02:28:10] I was going to say, let's not forget that it happens more and more again.

[02:28:12] Right.

[02:28:12] No, I know.

[02:28:13] Yeah.

[02:28:13] You were starting by going backwards.

[02:28:15] No, I know.

[02:28:15] I know.

[02:28:15] But it goes forward too.

[02:28:16] It goes forward too.

[02:28:17] Yeah.

[02:28:17] Yeah.

[02:28:17] For sure.

[02:28:18] So having punished all enemies, blah, blah, blah, he now dwells among his people forever.

[02:28:24] The persecutors receive their just punishment, but the righteous enter into eternal life.

[02:28:30] So we're almost done here.

[02:28:32] Let's read verse 18.

[02:28:33] Okay.

[02:28:34] In that day, the mountains will drip new wine and the hills will flow with milk.

[02:28:40] All the ravines of Judah will run with water.

[02:28:44] A fountain will flow out of the Lord's house and will water the Valley of Acacias.

[02:28:49] It was a very hopeful ending to the book.

[02:28:53] Yes.

[02:28:53] Yeah.

[02:28:53] Yes.

[02:28:54] So the Valley of Acacias, or as it's commonly known, the Valley of Shittim, was a place associated

[02:29:01] with both failure and victory.

[02:29:04] It is located on the eastern side of the Jordan River to the north of the Dead Sea.

[02:29:10] It was where the king of Moab sent his young women to the men of Israel to seduce them into

[02:29:16] idolatry and sexual immorality in the book of Numbers chapter 25.

[02:29:21] I recall that actually.

[02:29:23] It was also the launching place for the armies of Israel when they set out against Jericho

[02:29:28] and Canaan in the days of Joshua.

[02:29:31] And that was in the book of Joshua.

[02:29:33] Yeah.

[02:29:33] Isn't that where they crossed the river and like they stopped the water and like they carried

[02:29:37] shit across and stuff?

[02:29:39] Probably.

[02:29:40] Yeah.

[02:29:40] Now, I read a phrase that I really liked, and so I just wrote it down with zero context,

[02:29:46] but I think that you will understand what I mean by it.

[02:29:50] Okay.

[02:29:50] This phrase is vindictive justice.

[02:29:54] Yeah.

[02:29:54] Right?

[02:29:55] Yeah.

[02:29:55] So, I mean, that pretty much embodies the entire God concept, right?

[02:30:01] Yeah.

[02:30:01] At least in the Old Testament.

[02:30:02] Yeah.

[02:30:02] The Old Testament God is, you can never do anything right enough and his justice is dependent

[02:30:12] upon you doing things exactly just so.

[02:30:15] Mm-hmm.

[02:30:16] And if you don't, then he's going to rain fire and brimstone and kill you.

[02:30:20] Yeah.

[02:30:21] And that's pretty much how he operates, which is really disgusting.

[02:30:26] It really is.

[02:30:27] Yes.

[02:30:27] And I don't approve.

[02:30:28] And I, there is no amount of New Testament that can fix this God.

[02:30:33] No.

[02:30:34] No.

[02:30:34] I'm just saying.

[02:30:35] No.

[02:30:35] This God has already, he's done fucked up.

[02:30:37] He's so bad, ugly, and wrong.

[02:30:39] Right.

[02:30:39] He's so ancient and like, ugh, you're so old school stupid.

[02:30:43] And look, I get it, right?

[02:30:45] You can take as many things as you want from this Bible as you want, and you can forget

[02:30:50] the ugly bits, right?

[02:30:52] There's definitely, if we read through the Bible and tried to not see the ugly on purpose

[02:30:59] and pick out the philosophical, beautiful points, we could make it sound beautiful, right?

[02:31:05] But that's the problem.

[02:31:07] You can't pick and choose.

[02:31:08] You have to read it through.

[02:31:09] Yeah.

[02:31:10] If you read it through, it's ugly.

[02:31:11] Yeah.

[02:31:12] It's fucking horrible.

[02:31:13] Yeah.

[02:31:13] And the way you get to quote unquote beautiful is by killing a fuck ton of people.

[02:31:18] Yeah.

[02:31:18] And that's not okay.

[02:31:19] Yeah.

[02:31:20] So fuck that vindictive fuck.

[02:31:21] Yeah.

[02:31:22] That's all I'm saying.

[02:31:23] I agree.

[02:31:23] Fuck that vindictive fuck.

[02:31:25] Yeah.

[02:31:25] That sounds like a great place to end.

[02:31:27] Yeah.

[02:31:27] All right.

[02:31:27] Well, that was the wrap up for Joel.

[02:31:30] And the Q&A for the three chapters that we read.

[02:31:33] Yeah.

[02:31:34] And we finished another book, y'all.

[02:31:36] We did.

[02:31:37] We do have one more episode, though.

[02:31:38] And that will be our.

[02:31:41] You're always wrong.

[02:31:42] Or contradictions.

[02:31:44] And a pop quiz.

[02:31:45] Yeah.

[02:31:46] Which I will reveal here now.

[02:31:47] I got a 60% on.

[02:31:49] Oh.

[02:31:49] Yeah.

[02:31:50] Right.

[02:31:50] Right.

[02:31:51] So we'll be back.

[02:31:52] We're going to record this actually right after we finish this.

[02:31:55] So it'll be out tomorrow.

[02:31:56] Mm-hmm.

[02:31:56] And we'll see you guys then.

[02:31:58] Bye.

[02:32:04] Ben.

[02:32:05] Wife.

[02:32:05] Do you know what we're doing today?

[02:32:07] It's my favorite episode where I'm always right.

[02:32:10] You're always wrong, motherfucker.

[02:32:13] Damn it.

[02:32:14] All right.

[02:32:14] Well, so it's our contradictions episode.

[02:32:17] Mm-hmm.

[02:32:17] And pop quiz.

[02:32:19] Yeah.

[02:32:19] Yeah.

[02:32:19] And it's our official last episode for Joel.

[02:32:23] Another book.

[02:32:24] Dumb.

[02:32:24] Yeah.

[02:32:25] Another.

[02:32:25] Yeah.

[02:32:25] And we'll be starting the 30th book of the Bible after this.

[02:32:30] Mm-hmm.

[02:32:32] So do you have some good contradictions for us?

[02:32:34] No, not really good.

[02:32:35] No.

[02:32:36] No.

[02:32:37] Wife always the salesperson on our podcast.

[02:32:40] They're not good at all.

[02:32:44] And I think we have something else that we're doing.

[02:32:46] We're doing a pop quiz, right?

[02:32:47] I said that.

[02:32:48] Oh, I'm sorry.

[02:32:49] I wasn't listening apparently.

[02:32:52] That's okay.

[02:32:52] You never listen to me.

[02:32:56] So are you ready to do this?

[02:32:57] Uh-huh.

[02:32:58] Let's do it.

[02:32:59] Okie dokie.

[02:33:06] Okie.

[02:33:07] We are here doing our contradictions.

[02:33:11] Yes.

[02:33:11] Because you're always wrong, husband.

[02:33:15] And you know it, too.

[02:33:16] That's why you're laughing.

[02:33:17] I mean, you know.

[02:33:17] Yeah.

[02:33:18] All right.

[02:33:19] Here's the thing.

[02:33:20] The reason that I said that we don't have a lot of good ones.

[02:33:23] Yeah.

[02:33:23] Is because there were only three chapters in this book.

[02:33:26] That's true.

[02:33:27] That's true.

[02:33:27] And not a lot was said or done.

[02:33:31] And not of substance anyway.

[02:33:33] Right.

[02:33:33] Yeah.

[02:33:33] So we only have, there were only five.

[02:33:38] And of those, only one is even kind of a good question.

[02:33:42] I see.

[02:33:43] Okay.

[02:33:43] So let me give you an example.

[02:33:45] Yeah.

[02:33:45] Like we've done the is God merciful question like just so many times.

[02:33:50] Right.

[02:33:50] And the answer is yes and no.

[02:33:52] Right.

[02:33:53] Because cherry picking is the point.

[02:33:54] And we've covered it a million times.

[02:33:55] Yeah.

[02:33:55] Yeah.

[02:33:56] Another one, does God repent?

[02:33:57] Yes and no.

[02:33:58] Right.

[02:33:59] You know.

[02:33:59] Yeah.

[02:33:59] It just depends on which cherry picking you're doing.

[02:34:02] It gets old covering the same contradictions.

[02:34:04] Right.

[02:34:04] Because it's the same thing.

[02:34:05] It is.

[02:34:06] It is.

[02:34:06] It is.

[02:34:06] And it, the, is God good or bad?

[02:34:10] You know what I mean?

[02:34:10] Like those kind of questions now that we've done this so many times is like, oh, Christians

[02:34:16] say yes.

[02:34:16] Atheists say no.

[02:34:17] So, I mean, I mean, what would you do?

[02:34:19] I mean, you're kind of listing them off right now.

[02:34:20] Yeah.

[02:34:20] But I mean, the truth is that for all those things that you're going to list off, the answer

[02:34:25] is, and always has been throughout all the books of the Bible, God is both.

[02:34:29] Yes.

[02:34:29] Right.

[02:34:29] According to the Bible.

[02:34:31] Yes.

[02:34:31] God, there are contradictions on both sides.

[02:34:33] So, you know, I see it as if we've covered it a million times, we should still say it,

[02:34:40] but not like cover it.

[02:34:41] Right.

[02:34:42] And that's what I, that's why I'm specifically saying it.

[02:34:45] Yeah.

[02:34:45] But I'm like, you know the answer.

[02:34:48] I mean, we just did a contradictions episode for what was the last book of the Bible?

[02:34:52] It was Hosea.

[02:34:53] Yeah.

[02:34:54] And I think all those contradictions were in that contradictions episode as well.

[02:34:59] So.

[02:34:59] Exactly.

[02:35:00] You know, it's one thing if we do a really long book, right?

[02:35:03] And then get to the end of that one, maybe we can rehash some of the stuff because it's

[02:35:06] been a while.

[02:35:07] Right.

[02:35:07] But three chapters does not, like, we just talked about this shit.

[02:35:11] Yeah.

[02:35:11] It doesn't warrant me repeating the same thing from last time.

[02:35:15] I agree.

[02:35:15] I agree.

[02:35:16] Okay.

[02:35:16] So, but there's the, where does God dwell?

[02:35:19] Right.

[02:35:20] And we've done that one before, but not ad nauseum.

[02:35:23] Sure.

[02:35:24] So, where does God dwell?

[02:35:26] And do you want your multiple choices?

[02:35:27] Go ahead.

[02:35:28] Yeah, go ahead.

[02:35:28] Okay.

[02:35:29] Yeah.

[02:35:29] Either in Zion or in the heavens.

[02:35:32] Okay.

[02:35:34] I mean, according to Joel, I think it was in Zion.

[02:35:37] So.

[02:35:37] Right, right, right.

[02:35:38] Yeah.

[02:35:38] Yeah.

[02:35:38] And several verses in Psalms.

[02:35:41] Yeah.

[02:35:42] He lives in Zion.

[02:35:44] Sure.

[02:35:45] Okay.

[02:35:45] Yeah.

[02:35:45] But guess what?

[02:35:46] I'm right.

[02:35:47] You're always wrong.

[02:35:49] I'm always wrong.

[02:35:50] Because according to another verse of Psalms.

[02:35:54] Yeah.

[02:35:54] You can know, because Psalms versus Psalms.

[02:35:56] Yeah.

[02:35:57] Yeah.

[02:35:57] God dwells in the heavens.

[02:35:58] I love it when the same book contradicts itself.

[02:36:01] That's the funnest.

[02:36:02] Those are the best.

[02:36:02] I love those.

[02:36:03] Yeah.

[02:36:03] Yeah.

[02:36:04] Yeah.

[02:36:04] That's fun.

[02:36:04] There's another one in Ecclesiastes, but we haven't read that yet.

[02:36:09] So I'm just, you know, throwing it out there because there's not.

[02:36:12] I'm buying time.

[02:36:13] Right.

[02:36:14] Okay.

[02:36:14] Got it.

[02:36:14] So, okay.

[02:36:16] So another question was, will those who call on the Lord be delivered?

[02:36:22] Multiple choice.

[02:36:23] Yes or no?

[02:36:25] Yes.

[02:36:26] Not according to Joel.

[02:36:27] Really?

[02:36:28] Did you want to go with no?

[02:36:30] I'm still going to go with yes.

[02:36:31] Or no?

[02:36:31] I'm going to go with yes.

[02:36:32] Okay.

[02:36:32] I actually said that backwards.

[02:36:34] Yes.

[02:36:35] That is correct.

[02:36:36] Joel says yes.

[02:36:37] That's what I thought.

[02:36:38] Yeah.

[02:36:38] Yeah.

[02:36:39] Sorry.

[02:36:39] Yeah.

[02:36:40] Yeah.

[02:36:40] I wasn't going to argue because, you know, I'm always wrong.

[02:36:42] And I'm an idiot.

[02:36:46] Chapter 2, verse 32 says, whosoever shall call on the name of the Lord shall be delivered.

[02:36:53] Okay.

[02:36:53] And yeah, that is true.

[02:36:55] But guess what?

[02:36:57] I'm wrong.

[02:36:58] You're always wrong.

[02:36:59] Yeah.

[02:37:00] All right.

[02:37:00] Of course not.

[02:37:01] Of course those who call on the Lord won't be delivered.

[02:37:04] But that's because he's like, you suck and I fucking hate you burning hell, bitches.

[02:37:10] You know what I mean?

[02:37:11] Like when he says it in Jeremiah and Ezekiel.

[02:37:14] And yeah, you know, I'm going to be slightly fair here because I feel like the times where

[02:37:18] he's not going to deliver them is when they don't really believe in their heart.

[02:37:22] Right.

[02:37:23] That's what I'm saying.

[02:37:23] So if we're going for fairness factor here.

[02:37:27] Right.

[02:37:27] I think that it goes both ways.

[02:37:30] Yes.

[02:37:31] But they do generally caveat.

[02:37:34] It's situational.

[02:37:35] Right.

[02:37:36] Yeah.

[02:37:36] They caveat that it has to be meant.

[02:37:38] You have to mean it.

[02:37:38] Right.

[02:37:39] Right.

[02:37:39] Exactly.

[02:37:40] Well, that actually kind of gets into the only other one, which is should we rend our clothes?

[02:37:47] And I didn't choose that as an actual question because it's situational.

[02:37:52] He's saying he's not saying, yes, rend your clothes.

[02:37:56] No, don't rend your clothes.

[02:37:57] He's saying, yeah, when you mourn, rend your clothes.

[02:38:00] But but you know, not if you're being a fake ass.

[02:38:04] Right.

[02:38:04] So is that really a contradiction?

[02:38:07] I don't think so.

[02:38:08] No, I'm going to go with it's not really a contradiction.

[02:38:12] Right.

[02:38:12] Because generally they lay it out pretty well.

[02:38:15] I want the you're always wrong episodes to always have like concrete contradictions.

[02:38:21] Right.

[02:38:21] We're atheists.

[02:38:22] Obviously, we want it to be wrong.

[02:38:23] Yeah.

[02:38:24] So it's really exciting to be able to be like, ha ha, this book sucks.

[02:38:28] And here's why.

[02:38:29] No, but we also want to be fair.

[02:38:30] Right.

[02:38:31] And that's why I'm like, we don't really have some good questions this time.

[02:38:34] No, no.

[02:38:35] So they were either like the same stupid ones that we've always read it at the end of every book.

[02:38:41] Sure.

[02:38:42] Or they were situational.

[02:38:44] And it's like, come on, person that put this list together.

[02:38:47] That doesn't count as a contradiction.

[02:38:49] I'm going to say this.

[02:38:50] I can authoritatively say that up until this point in the Bible and through Joel, God is a dick.

[02:38:59] Yeah.

[02:38:59] And that is that is right.

[02:39:02] I am right on that account.

[02:39:03] You know what?

[02:39:03] You are right, husband.

[02:39:06] He is indeed a dick.

[02:39:08] And there's just no getting around that.

[02:39:11] Right.

[02:39:11] Yeah.

[02:39:12] I feel like we hadn't called God a dick in a while.

[02:39:15] No, we haven't.

[02:39:16] You're right.

[02:39:16] So it felt necessary.

[02:39:18] It was due.

[02:39:19] To bring it up again.

[02:39:19] Yeah.

[02:39:20] Yeah.

[02:39:20] Especially during this time of not having a lot of good questions.

[02:39:25] Right.

[02:39:25] God's a dick.

[02:39:25] Boy, and specifically in Joel, like he was he was killing a lot of people.

[02:39:30] He was.

[02:39:30] And he was not very nice.

[02:39:32] No.

[02:39:33] Until the last chapter.

[02:39:34] But then he was like, and I might save some of you.

[02:39:37] When?

[02:39:38] Who knows?

[02:39:39] Sure.

[02:39:39] Ask all the apologists.

[02:39:40] They all have 10 different answers.

[02:39:42] Right.

[02:39:43] Are you ready for a pop quiz, husband?

[02:39:45] I.

[02:39:46] Yeah.

[02:39:46] Let's do it.

[02:39:46] I mean, it's only three chapters and I got a 60 percent.

[02:39:50] Yikes.

[02:39:51] Right.

[02:39:51] I hope I do better.

[02:39:52] I hope you do better as well.

[02:39:53] I don't have a lot of confidence in that.

[02:39:55] But last time I beat you.

[02:39:56] You did.

[02:39:57] You did.

[02:39:57] And you retain information better than I do.

[02:40:00] Sometimes.

[02:40:01] A lot of times.

[02:40:02] Yeah.

[02:40:02] The only information I retain is that which I, for some reason, find super interesting.

[02:40:08] And it just sticks.

[02:40:09] And it sticks hard.

[02:40:11] And then I'm like, no, absolutely.

[02:40:13] I'm right.

[02:40:13] And this is what I was wearing that day.

[02:40:15] Right.

[02:40:16] And this is what you ate.

[02:40:19] And like.

[02:40:20] It's funny.

[02:40:20] We're in.

[02:40:21] You might even admit this.

[02:40:22] I don't think we really talked about this before.

[02:40:24] But I feel like in the past, you thought you were always right about everything.

[02:40:28] Yeah.

[02:40:28] And I feel like through the course of doing this podcast, you might have learned that you're not always right.

[02:40:34] Wife might also sometimes be wrong.

[02:40:36] I would say in the course of being married to you.

[02:40:40] Oh.

[02:40:41] Yeah.

[02:40:41] Okay.

[02:40:42] Because you we've taught each other that each other is not always right.

[02:40:46] Sure.

[02:40:47] Sure.

[02:40:48] Because we both have a very heavy sense of.

[02:40:51] Come on.

[02:40:52] The people around me are stupid.

[02:40:53] Of course, I know best.

[02:40:55] And generally, that's true.

[02:40:57] But then we met our match in each other.

[02:40:59] Right.

[02:41:00] And we're like, well, I'm still almost always right.

[02:41:03] But sometimes I'm wrong.

[02:41:05] But just don't tell anybody.

[02:41:06] Okay, partner.

[02:41:07] Right.

[02:41:08] Right.

[02:41:08] And we're like, I promise.

[02:41:09] Yeah.

[02:41:10] Except for that.

[02:41:10] Now we're doing it live on our podcast.

[02:41:12] Right.

[02:41:12] But that was that was our vows at our wedding.

[02:41:14] I promise never to tell anybody how fucking stupid you are.

[02:41:18] Was that it?

[02:41:18] Was it?

[02:41:19] Yeah.

[02:41:19] Yeah.

[02:41:19] Yeah.

[02:41:20] You don't remember?

[02:41:21] No, I don't.

[02:41:23] That's because it didn't really happen.

[02:41:24] Okay.

[02:41:24] I can also lie with a straight face.

[02:41:28] It's another one of my skills.

[02:41:30] All right.

[02:41:30] Ready?

[02:41:31] I'm ready.

[02:41:31] There's only 11 questions.

[02:41:33] Number one.

[02:41:34] What shall the moon be turned to before the great and awesome day of the Lord, according

[02:41:40] to the book of Joel?

[02:41:41] Multiple choice.

[02:41:42] Ready?

[02:41:42] I'm ready.

[02:41:43] I'm ready.

[02:41:43] Okay.

[02:41:44] Darkness, blood, fire, or snow.

[02:41:47] And for the ones playing at home, I'm going to reread it to give them a chance.

[02:41:50] Okay.

[02:41:50] Yep.

[02:41:51] What shall the moon be turned to before the great and awesome day of the Lord, according

[02:41:57] to the book of Joel?

[02:41:58] Joel?

[02:41:59] Darkness, blood, fire, or snow?

[02:42:02] I take issue with the fact that he's great and awesome.

[02:42:05] Because that's Oz, the great and terrible Oz.

[02:42:09] He's great and awesome.

[02:42:11] But I'm going to go with darkness.

[02:42:14] Okay.

[02:42:15] I don't think that's right.

[02:42:16] Oh.

[02:42:17] I had picked blood and blood wasn't right.

[02:42:19] Okay.

[02:42:19] So I don't know.

[02:42:20] All right.

[02:42:20] Yeah.

[02:42:20] All right.

[02:42:21] Number two.

[02:42:21] Who was Joel?

[02:42:23] And then I'll give you the multiple choice.

[02:42:25] Jeff, Brian.

[02:42:26] Right?

[02:42:27] Zach.

[02:42:28] Geoph.

[02:42:28] Billy.

[02:42:30] Okay.

[02:42:30] He's either the son of Amoz, the son of Joash, the son of Pethuel, the son of Hilkiah.

[02:42:38] Okay.

[02:42:38] Okay.

[02:42:39] And I'll ask it again for our friends listening at home.

[02:42:41] Yeah.

[02:42:42] Who was Joel?

[02:42:44] The son of Amoz, the son of Joash, the son of Pethuel, the son of Hilkiah.

[02:42:52] First of all, I think it's odd that we define who we are by our father.

[02:42:56] Yeah.

[02:42:56] In the Bible.

[02:42:57] Yeah.

[02:42:57] You're not your own person.

[02:42:59] Right.

[02:42:59] Right.

[02:42:59] But I think if I'm recalling correctly, that was Pethuel.

[02:43:03] That is correct.

[02:43:04] And I got that one correct as well.

[02:43:06] Okay.

[02:43:07] All right.

[02:43:07] Yeah.

[02:43:07] Yeah.

[02:43:08] According to Joel, what should the weak say?

[02:43:19] Yeah.

[02:43:26] That's the truth about me.

[02:43:28] I am a warrior.

[02:43:30] The Lord will fight for me or let the Lord be praised.

[02:43:35] I don't know the answer to this one, but I'm going to have to go with the weak or the Lord

[02:43:42] will fight for me.

[02:43:43] Okay.

[02:43:43] But again, I don't know the answer to that one.

[02:43:46] Yeah.

[02:43:46] I don't remember.

[02:43:47] All right.

[02:43:47] Number four.

[02:43:49] According to Joel, how did the Lord react from Zion?

[02:43:54] Did he react with thunders, whispers, roars, or lights?

[02:44:00] I'll read it again.

[02:44:01] Okay.

[02:44:01] According to Joel, how did the Lord react from Zion?

[02:44:07] Thunders, whispers, roars, or lights?

[02:44:13] I'm going to go with thunders because I think I remember that being the case, but again,

[02:44:18] I'm not sure.

[02:44:18] It's either that or roars, but I'm going to say thunders.

[02:44:20] See, I missed so many that I literally can't remember which ones, except for the Pethuel was

[02:44:26] his father.

[02:44:27] I knew that one.

[02:44:29] In the book of Joel, this is number five.

[02:44:31] Where did the Lord say he will sit to judge the surrounding nations?

[02:44:37] The Valley of Shittim, the Valley of Jehoshaphat, Riverside, or on the throne of the King of Israel?

[02:44:46] And I'll read it again.

[02:44:47] Yeah.

[02:44:48] I saw your face.

[02:44:49] You're like, the fuck?

[02:44:50] Right.

[02:44:51] In the book of Joel, where did the Lord say he will sit to judge the surrounding nations?

[02:44:58] The Valley of Shittim, the Valley of Jehoshaphat, Riverside, or on the throne of the King of Israel?

[02:45:06] I think, I mean, they were talking about bringing all the people that he had sent out to kill

[02:45:13] the Israelites to the Valley of Jehoshaphat, and he was going to judge them there.

[02:45:17] So I'm going to go with Jehoshaphat.

[02:45:19] That's what I picked, and I think that one was wrong, but I could be wrong about that being wrong.

[02:45:23] Sure, sure.

[02:45:24] I mean, the wording about the throne of the King of Israel was weird, because they did

[02:45:31] have kings.

[02:45:32] Yeah.

[02:45:32] So that one's a weird phrasing.

[02:45:36] Yeah.

[02:45:36] And I question it, but okay.

[02:45:39] Right.

[02:45:40] That's the only other one that I could think maybe it might be.

[02:45:43] Yeah.

[02:45:43] I don't know.

[02:45:44] But whatever.

[02:45:44] We'll find out.

[02:45:45] Yeah.

[02:45:45] Okay, number six.

[02:45:47] What has eaten what the cutting locust has left?

[02:45:51] Remember, there's different kinds of locust.

[02:45:53] Yeah, I remember.

[02:45:54] Was it a pig?

[02:45:55] Was it swarming locust?

[02:45:57] Was it frog?

[02:45:58] Or was it all of the above?

[02:46:01] Well, this one's pretty easy, I think.

[02:46:04] I'm going to go with swarming locust.

[02:46:06] That is correct.

[02:46:08] Okay.

[02:46:08] Yes.

[02:46:08] Because they only talked about, I mean, I don't remember anything about pigs or frogs.

[02:46:12] There were no other animals.

[02:46:13] Yeah.

[02:46:13] Yeah.

[02:46:14] According to, oh, this is number seven.

[02:46:16] Yeah.

[02:46:16] According to Joel chapter two, who shall dream dreams?

[02:46:21] I don't remember that at all.

[02:46:22] I remember because I was, I think I said something about dream a little dream for me or something

[02:46:26] like that.

[02:46:27] Did you?

[02:46:28] I think so.

[02:46:29] It was, yeah.

[02:46:30] I don't remember that.

[02:46:31] At the very least, I said it just now.

[02:46:32] Oh, okay.

[02:46:33] Okay.

[02:46:34] Yeah.

[02:46:34] That's the important thing.

[02:46:35] Right.

[02:46:35] So your choices are kings, judges, priests, or none of the above.

[02:46:40] Let me read it again.

[02:46:42] According to Joel chapter two, who shall dream dreams?

[02:46:48] Kings, judges, priests, or none of the above?

[02:46:52] I am going to go with priests.

[02:46:56] I don't remember.

[02:46:57] But again, I'm a little, I'm a little iffy on that one.

[02:47:00] So.

[02:47:01] I think I picked none of the above, but I think I got it wrong.

[02:47:04] Okay.

[02:47:04] So you might be right.

[02:47:05] Sure.

[02:47:05] Yeah.

[02:47:06] Okay.

[02:47:06] Number eight.

[02:47:07] Why were they asked to put in the sickle in the book of Joel?

[02:47:13] Was it because the enemy will soon invade?

[02:47:16] Famine is coming.

[02:47:18] The harvest is ripe or the pests are destroying the fruits.

[02:47:23] I'll ask it again.

[02:47:25] Yeah.

[02:47:25] Why were they asked to put in the sickle in the book of Joel?

[02:47:30] The enemy will soon invade.

[02:47:33] Famine is coming.

[02:47:34] The harvest is ripe.

[02:47:36] The harvest is ripe.

[02:48:04] And the cutter in the second chapter of the book of Joel.

[02:48:07] Did he call it his great destroyer?

[02:48:11] His bad pests?

[02:48:13] His great army?

[02:48:14] His great army?

[02:48:15] Or his beloved creation?

[02:48:17] Now, rate it again.

[02:48:18] Sure.

[02:48:18] These are hard, right?

[02:48:19] They are, yeah.

[02:48:19] Like, there's only three fucking chapters.

[02:48:21] Well, and sometimes I wonder if it's because of the translation we're reading that we don't

[02:48:24] always know the answers to.

[02:48:25] Yeah, I wonder about that also.

[02:48:27] There's all kinds of different phrasings for different things.

[02:48:29] So if you don't have the correct word, like, yeah, it's not good.

[02:48:34] Yeah.

[02:48:34] So sometimes I take issue with some of these because I'm like, I don't know that I knew

[02:48:37] the answer for that.

[02:48:38] Right.

[02:48:38] Like, if the question asks about ham, but the word they used was bacon.

[02:48:43] Like, come on now.

[02:48:45] Come on.

[02:48:46] Right.

[02:48:46] Not that they use bacon or ham in the Bible, but you get what I'm saying.

[02:48:51] Yeah.

[02:48:52] All right.

[02:48:52] Number nine.

[02:48:53] What did the Lord call?

[02:48:55] Oh, wait.

[02:48:55] Did we answer that one?

[02:48:56] No, we didn't.

[02:48:57] I was supposed to read it again.

[02:48:58] Yeah.

[02:48:58] What did the Lord call the swarming locust, hopper, destroyer, and cutter in the second

[02:49:05] chapter of the book of Joel?

[02:49:07] His great destroyer, his bad pest, his great enemy, or his beloved creation?

[02:49:13] I'm going to go with his great destroyer.

[02:49:15] Okay.

[02:49:16] I don't remember at all.

[02:49:17] No, I got it.

[02:49:19] Okay.

[02:49:19] Last question.

[02:49:20] Oh, there's only 10.

[02:49:21] I thought there were 11.

[02:49:22] That's even better.

[02:49:23] Number 10.

[02:49:24] According to the book of Joel, how shall the day of the Lord come?

[02:49:29] Like a thief in the night?

[02:49:31] As destruction from the Almighty.

[02:49:33] Like a shepherd.

[02:49:35] As the dawning of the day.

[02:49:37] I'll read it again.

[02:49:38] Okay.

[02:49:39] According to the book of Joel, how shall the day of the Lord come?

[02:49:44] Like a thief in the night?

[02:49:46] As destruction from the Almighty?

[02:49:48] Like a shepherd?

[02:49:50] Or as the dawning of the day?

[02:49:52] I'm going to go with as destruction from the Almighty thing.

[02:49:55] All right.

[02:49:56] Let's see what happens.

[02:49:57] Yeah.

[02:49:58] I'm curious how bad I did.

[02:50:00] Okay.

[02:50:01] Let me see what score you got before we read each one.

[02:50:05] Right.

[02:50:05] Wow.

[02:50:05] You did even worse than me.

[02:50:07] Awesome.

[02:50:07] You got a 40%.

[02:50:09] Jeez.

[02:50:10] Success rate.

[02:50:11] Generally speaking, the average is 61.39.

[02:50:15] Below average on this one.

[02:50:16] That's okay.

[02:50:16] I was too.

[02:50:17] Yeah.

[02:50:17] But not by much.

[02:50:19] Yeah.

[02:50:20] I was about average, I would say.

[02:50:22] Yeah.

[02:50:22] Yeah.

[02:50:22] And you failed it so fucking hard.

[02:50:25] I did.

[02:50:25] I did.

[02:50:26] All right.

[02:50:26] That's okay.

[02:50:27] That's okay.

[02:50:27] This was a hard one.

[02:50:28] Yeah.

[02:50:28] And I think the ones I got right was either the Pethul one, his father, was the only one

[02:50:33] that I was sure of.

[02:50:34] Right.

[02:50:34] Everything else, I was like, whoa.

[02:50:36] Well, such vague questions, but yeah.

[02:50:39] Okay.

[02:50:39] All right.

[02:50:40] Number one.

[02:50:41] What shall the moon be turned to before the great and awesome day of the Lord, according

[02:50:45] to the book of Joel?

[02:50:46] You chose darkness.

[02:50:47] The answer was blood.

[02:50:49] Maybe that's one of the ones I got right.

[02:50:51] I thought I got it wrong, but yeah, it's blood.

[02:50:53] Right.

[02:50:54] And that was chapter two, verse 31.

[02:50:56] The sun shall be turned to darkness.

[02:50:58] So it was the sun that turned to darkness.

[02:51:00] Okay.

[02:51:01] And the moon to blood before the great and awesome day of the Lord comes.

[02:51:05] Got it.

[02:51:05] All right.

[02:51:06] I knew there was darkness in there somewhere.

[02:51:07] It's the sun.

[02:51:08] That makes sense in retrospect.

[02:51:10] Right.

[02:51:11] Because when I took this quiz, I didn't read the scripts that are below it.

[02:51:16] Got it.

[02:51:16] I just wanted the score.

[02:51:18] Sure.

[02:51:18] Yeah.

[02:51:19] All right.

[02:51:19] Number two.

[02:51:20] Who was Joel, son of Pethuel?

[02:51:21] And we both got it right.

[02:51:23] Right.

[02:51:23] Okay.

[02:51:24] So I'm not even going to read that one.

[02:51:25] Right.

[02:51:25] Right.

[02:51:25] Number three.

[02:51:26] According to Joel, what should the weak say?

[02:51:29] They should say, I'm a warrior.

[02:51:31] You got that wrong.

[02:51:32] You chose the Lord will fight for me.

[02:51:34] I got that one right.

[02:51:35] Okay.

[02:51:36] Right.

[02:51:37] Chapter three, verse 10.

[02:51:39] It was the whole turn your plows into swords because you're going to need all the help

[02:51:44] you can fucking get if you're taking on God.

[02:51:46] Go ahead and call yourself strong.

[02:51:48] I kind of knew that that's a section it was from, but to sit, I don't know, to call

[02:51:54] the weak strong.

[02:51:56] Right.

[02:51:56] I was like, that doesn't make sense.

[02:51:57] Okay.

[02:51:58] Whatever.

[02:51:58] Here's what it says.

[02:51:59] Beat your plowshares into swords and your pruning hooks into spears.

[02:52:04] Let the weak say, I am a warrior.

[02:52:06] Okay.

[02:52:07] All right.

[02:52:07] Yeah.

[02:52:08] It actually is exactly that.

[02:52:10] Right.

[02:52:10] But I'm pretty sure it was only an accident that I got that one right.

[02:52:14] Got it.

[02:52:14] Number four.

[02:52:15] According to Joel, how did the Lord react from Zion?

[02:52:19] With thunders, whispers, roars, or lights?

[02:52:22] Probably roars.

[02:52:23] It's roars.

[02:52:24] Of course.

[02:52:25] You got that wrong because you chose thunder.

[02:52:27] I did.

[02:52:27] Chapter three, verse 16 reads, the Lord roars from Zion and utters his voice from Jerusalem

[02:52:33] and the heavens and the earth quake.

[02:52:35] But the Lord is a refuge to his people, a stronghold to the people of Israel.

[02:52:39] There was thunder in there somewhere though.

[02:52:41] There was.

[02:52:41] I remember it.

[02:52:42] Yeah.

[02:52:42] I don't know.

[02:52:43] Honestly.

[02:52:43] But that's why this is like, they trick you with these questions.

[02:52:46] And I'm like, I know I knew that was in there somewhere.

[02:52:49] You know what else?

[02:52:49] They ask questions that are like fucking inane and irrelevant.

[02:52:53] Right.

[02:52:53] Like, who fucking cares?

[02:52:55] Well, that's just it.

[02:52:56] Like, I feel like we should come up with our own Bible study quizzes for these things because

[02:53:00] I don't like their questions even.

[02:53:03] Here's the thing though.

[02:53:03] Like, I agree with you in theory, but I am so bad at coming up with test questions.

[02:53:11] Right.

[02:53:12] And I realized this when I was in college and I would try to make up questions for myself

[02:53:18] to try to guess what a teacher might ask.

[02:53:22] I just couldn't, like, I would read the information and I'm like, how do I turn this into a quiz?

[02:53:29] So I'm not your girl for that.

[02:53:31] Sorry.

[02:53:32] Like, I'm not saying it's a thing that isn't or shouldn't be done.

[02:53:35] I'm saying that is not in my wheelhouse.

[02:53:38] Yeah, no, I got it.

[02:53:39] All right.

[02:53:39] Number five, in the book of Joel, where did the Lord say he will sit to judge the surrounding

[02:53:45] nations?

[02:53:45] And I am mistaken.

[02:53:47] You got this one right.

[02:53:47] It was the Valley of Jehoshaphat.

[02:53:49] Okay.

[02:53:50] Which I can't remember now if I chose that or not, but it seems like I should have.

[02:53:53] Right.

[02:53:54] Okay.

[02:53:55] What has eaten what the cutting locust has left?

[02:53:59] We both got that one right.

[02:54:00] The swarming locust.

[02:54:02] Okay.

[02:54:02] Okay.

[02:54:02] That makes sense.

[02:54:03] I will allow it.

[02:54:04] Right.

[02:54:05] Number seven.

[02:54:06] Oh, I got this one right.

[02:54:07] You got this one wrong.

[02:54:08] Oh.

[02:54:09] According to Joel chapter two, who shall dream dreams?

[02:54:13] Kings, judges, priests, or none of the above?

[02:54:16] And you chose priests.

[02:54:17] And the answer was none of the above.

[02:54:19] Yeah.

[02:54:19] And that's what I chose.

[02:54:20] Okay.

[02:54:21] That's exciting.

[02:54:21] This is fun going back through this.

[02:54:23] Sure.

[02:54:23] I'm like, did I do good there?

[02:54:25] Okay.

[02:54:26] So chapter two, verse 28 reads, and it shall come to pass afterward that I will pour out

[02:54:31] my spirit.

[02:54:32] Yeah, you will.

[02:54:33] On all the flesh, your sons and your daughters shall prophecy.

[02:54:37] Your old men shall dream dreams and your young men shall see visions.

[02:54:43] Okay.

[02:54:44] Okay.

[02:54:44] Yeah.

[02:54:45] Yeah.

[02:54:45] Number eight.

[02:54:46] You got this one wrong.

[02:54:48] Of course.

[02:54:49] Why were they asked to put in the sickle in the book of Joel?

[02:54:52] You chose because the enemy will soon invade.

[02:54:55] The answer was the harvest is ripe.

[02:54:58] Got it.

[02:54:58] I got that one wrong.

[02:54:59] I think that I chose the same answer as you, none of them thinking about it.

[02:55:03] Right.

[02:55:03] So chapter three, verse 13 reads, put in the sickle for the harvest is ripe.

[02:55:09] Go in, tread for the wine presses full.

[02:55:12] The vats overflow for their evil is great.

[02:55:14] That's right.

[02:55:15] That was their feeling good chapter.

[02:55:17] Feel good.

[02:55:19] Number nine.

[02:55:20] What did the Lord call the swarming locust, hopper, destroyer, and cutter in the second

[02:55:26] chapter of the book of Joel?

[02:55:28] You got this one wrong.

[02:55:30] He called it his great army, but you chose his great destroyer.

[02:55:35] Got it.

[02:55:35] And I don't remember what I guessed and if I got it right or wrong.

[02:55:39] Sure.

[02:55:39] But chapter two, verse 25 reads, I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has

[02:55:46] eaten, the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter, my great army, which I sent among you.

[02:55:53] Okay.

[02:55:54] Okay.

[02:55:54] Yeah.

[02:55:55] All right.

[02:55:56] Number 10.

[02:55:57] According to the book of Joel, how shall the day of the Lord come?

[02:56:01] You got this one right.

[02:56:03] Yeah.

[02:56:03] As destruction from the almighty.

[02:56:05] I had chosen like a thief in the night just because it sounded poetic.

[02:56:09] And you know I'm a sucker for poesy.

[02:56:12] Right.

[02:56:12] Right.

[02:56:13] All right.

[02:56:14] That is that.

[02:56:15] We are fucking done with Joel.

[02:56:16] We are.

[02:56:17] Yeah.

[02:56:17] We are.

[02:56:18] Yeah.

[02:56:18] I do have to say, I don't, I really don't like the questions that they use in these things

[02:56:23] because they don't seem relevant to the overall, you know, purpose of what we read.

[02:56:29] Yeah.

[02:56:29] I'm like, who gives a fuck about that?

[02:56:31] These questions are like the power trip and teacher.

[02:56:34] Did you memorize everything?

[02:56:35] I bet you didn't.

[02:56:36] Right.

[02:56:37] Right.

[02:56:37] Oh, I thought we were trying to learn, but what you want to do is a gotcha.

[02:56:42] Sure.

[02:56:43] That's not the same.

[02:56:44] Yeah.

[02:56:44] Like if you get the general theme, you get the idea of what was happening and, you know,

[02:56:50] like the important characters, I feel like that's good enough.

[02:56:53] Yeah.

[02:56:53] But whatever.

[02:56:54] Like, I always thought that there should be somehow enough teachers ever in the world

[02:57:00] to just be able to have a discussion with each student and have them describe a lesson

[02:57:06] to you.

[02:57:07] Yeah.

[02:57:07] Just to see, did you get the main idea?

[02:57:09] Can you do critical thinking?

[02:57:11] Yeah.

[02:57:11] Like actual learning.

[02:57:12] Yeah.

[02:57:13] Right.

[02:57:13] Yeah.

[02:57:14] Yeah, exactly.

[02:57:15] Because, okay, how many times, and maybe this is just me because, you know, I've learned

[02:57:20] as an adult that I have autism.

[02:57:22] Um, how many times as an adult or as a kid did you have to read a passage in literature

[02:57:30] and like for a test?

[02:57:33] Yeah.

[02:57:33] Um, usually they were like the state tests, I want to say.

[02:57:37] Okay.

[02:57:37] And so you didn't have a lot of time to like dig in and it wasn't from a book.

[02:57:42] It was just an excerpt.

[02:57:43] Right.

[02:57:43] Right.

[02:57:43] And then the questions ask opinions about stuff.

[02:57:47] And I'm always like, well, I mean, it's this, but it could also be that.

[02:57:53] And then the choices, there's like 10 different multiple choice answers.

[02:57:57] Right.

[02:57:58] And some of them are like A and B, C, but not D, C and D.

[02:58:03] And it's like, oh my God, like I, I overthink every one of the questions and because they feel

[02:58:11] tricksy instead of, Hey, Hey, what can you, let's talk about this passage.

[02:58:17] And did you kind of get it?

[02:58:19] And what did you think about this thing?

[02:58:22] See, I never stressed about multiple choice questions because I either knew it or I didn't.

[02:58:25] And if I didn't know it, it was just my best guess.

[02:58:27] So like those, those didn't bother me.

[02:58:29] The ones that bothered me, well, they were the easiest and the hardest.

[02:58:33] So if I didn't study for something, the essay, the essay questions, right?

[02:58:36] If I, if I didn't study for something or the long answer, not essay, but like,

[02:58:41] Yeah, I was fucked.

[02:58:42] Yeah.

[02:58:42] But if I did study for something, you might not know the easiest.

[02:58:46] Cause like, yeah, even if I just rudimentary, like basically just studied the gist of it.

[02:58:51] Yeah.

[02:58:52] I could answer the question and still get it, you know, but the, the, the multiple choice,

[02:58:57] I'm just like, well, I either get it or I don't.

[02:58:59] Right.

[02:58:59] So.

[02:59:00] And I think that that's why, because I didn't fuss about the essay or the long answer,

[02:59:07] whatever.

[02:59:07] Like those didn't bother me either because I can bullshit my way out of a bag.

[02:59:12] Yeah.

[02:59:13] But, um, the multiple choice, like that just bothered me.

[02:59:17] It bothered me because like, I wanted to know what is the answer.

[02:59:21] Right.

[02:59:22] Right.

[02:59:22] Like, what is the answer?

[02:59:24] Can we talk about this?

[02:59:25] Like, I wanted to go up to the instructor and be like, but can we talk about this when

[02:59:30] the test is done?

[02:59:31] Right.

[02:59:31] And they, they don't.

[02:59:33] And that to me is like, not a good example of learning.

[02:59:38] Right.

[02:59:38] Like, here's a question.

[02:59:39] We'll never talk about it again.

[02:59:41] Hope that works out for you.

[02:59:42] And I'm like, but I wanted to know.

[02:59:45] Yeah.

[02:59:45] What?

[02:59:45] And how did you reach that conclusion?

[02:59:46] I think that's the biggest problem with learning and, and, and cookie cutter kind of scenarios.

[02:59:52] Right.

[02:59:53] Learning is not something that they necessarily care about.

[02:59:56] No.

[02:59:57] It's about memorization and passing and state scores.

[03:00:01] Yeah.

[03:00:01] So the, the whole, like, you know, you, you, I've got a, I've got a thing where I've memorized

[03:00:05] like the helping verbs and I don't, I couldn't actually sit there and tell you what they are,

[03:00:10] but I can rattle them off.

[03:00:12] Go ahead.

[03:00:12] Go ahead.

[03:00:13] It's your favorite.

[03:00:15] Okay.

[03:00:16] Helping verbs.

[03:00:17] Everybody.

[03:00:17] Am is, are, was, were, be, be, men, do, does, did, have, has, had, can, could, shall,

[03:00:20] should, will, would, may, might, must.

[03:00:22] There you go.

[03:00:23] Yeah.

[03:00:23] So much because you rattle it off so fucking fast that nobody can understand what the fuck

[03:00:29] you're saying.

[03:00:29] Right.

[03:00:30] And you do it like every time, even something vaguely, even close to that area in conversation

[03:00:39] comes up.

[03:00:40] You're like, Ooh, helping verse.

[03:00:42] And I'm like, why?

[03:00:44] But no, but it's the point, it's the, it's the, it's an exercise in stupidity.

[03:00:50] Right.

[03:00:50] Right.

[03:00:50] Like I don't have any need for that in my brain, but it's there.

[03:00:55] Right.

[03:00:55] Here's, here's my problem.

[03:00:57] Like I have zero ability to memorize things.

[03:01:00] I have to learn something or I have to make up a, a mnemonic device or a jingle or like something

[03:01:10] that is a clue, like a workaround.

[03:01:13] Right.

[03:01:13] You know what I mean?

[03:01:14] A system, which is very autistic.

[03:01:17] You, you come up with workarounds.

[03:01:19] Everything's a transaction kind of thing.

[03:01:22] Right.

[03:01:22] Yeah.

[03:01:23] So things like memorizing the multiplication table, that didn't work for me.

[03:01:30] Right.

[03:01:30] I do not have the multiplication table memorized.

[03:01:33] What I have is the ability to count by numbers.

[03:01:38] So once I got up to my sixes, like I had to learn how to count by six in order to be able

[03:01:44] to tell you things like what is six times seven.

[03:01:47] Sure.

[03:01:48] Because I can't memorize.

[03:01:50] Like it's just, it's so much random data that I have.

[03:01:55] I can't, I can't place it.

[03:01:57] Like I need to be able to picture where it belongs.

[03:02:01] But I don't think necessarily memorization equates to learning.

[03:02:05] It doesn't.

[03:02:05] That's my point.

[03:02:06] So it doesn't really matter.

[03:02:08] I actually learned why six times seven is 42.

[03:02:14] Right.

[03:02:14] Because you can count to by six, seven times, or you can count by seven, six times.

[03:02:21] Sure.

[03:02:21] The first time that I told my mom that, it blew her fucking mind.

[03:02:27] And I get it.

[03:02:29] Like if you tried to explain that to kids that are memorizing the times tables, you know, they're

[03:02:35] like, what?

[03:02:36] Oh, right.

[03:02:38] Like I have a better understanding of how numbers slide into each other.

[03:02:43] Sure.

[03:02:43] Because I had to learn how to count by the numbers rather than just memorize these random fucking

[03:02:50] numbers that make no goddamn sense.

[03:02:52] Right.

[03:02:52] Yeah.

[03:02:52] So that's my prime example of memorization versus learning.

[03:02:57] And that learning is so much better because you actually understand.

[03:03:00] It takes longer.

[03:03:01] I mean, even the alphabet.

[03:03:01] We have to memorize the alphabet.

[03:03:03] Right.

[03:03:03] Right.

[03:03:03] Yeah.

[03:03:04] But like what practical purpose does that really have other than alphabetizing something?

[03:03:08] Right.

[03:03:08] Right.

[03:03:09] Which a lot of kids, this surprises me.

[03:03:12] A lot of kids have problems finding stuff in a dictionary because they don't understand

[03:03:20] alphabetization.

[03:03:21] Hmm.

[03:03:21] Yeah.

[03:03:22] Interesting.

[03:03:23] Like they know if it starts with an A, it's in the A's.

[03:03:26] Right.

[03:03:26] But then after that, like they don't know that you go to the next letter.

[03:03:30] Huh.

[03:03:30] And I found that when kid was in elementary school, one of the school years I volunteered

[03:03:39] and helped kids that were like struggling a little bit.

[03:03:43] Yeah.

[03:03:43] And like I would just sit out in the hallway with them and like we go over spelling words

[03:03:47] and stuff like that.

[03:03:48] Yeah.

[03:03:48] And I discovered that like kids cannot, cannot.

[03:03:54] Cannot.

[03:03:54] They cannot.

[03:03:55] Yeah.

[03:03:56] And like another thing, I know this is so way off topic.

[03:04:00] Another thing is that the teachers would give me these assignments to work with the kids

[03:04:07] and they were all game based, which game based learning is a thing.

[03:04:12] If you can make learning fun.

[03:04:14] Right.

[03:04:14] Absolutely.

[03:04:15] But these particular games like served no purpose.

[03:04:19] They didn't help.

[03:04:20] Right.

[03:04:20] And so I was like, hang on, hang on, hang on.

[03:04:23] What you actually need is fucking practice.

[03:04:27] Yeah.

[03:04:27] Like you just need to write this word several times and then you'll, you'll get it because

[03:04:32] you can sound things out.

[03:04:34] Like I've worked with you on these other words.

[03:04:36] You know how to do this.

[03:04:37] Right.

[03:04:37] You don't need to be farting around with these other fucking pointless assignments where

[03:04:42] you lose track of why you're trying to, to do this.

[03:04:45] Sure.

[03:04:45] So I would just have them like, first I'll call off all your spelling words.

[03:04:50] Right.

[03:04:50] And then we'll see what you know.

[03:04:53] And we're just going to put those words aside.

[03:04:55] You got those.

[03:04:55] Yeah.

[03:04:56] Like, but they wanted me to practice all of them.

[03:04:58] And I'm like, I'm not wasting your time or mine kid.

[03:05:01] If you know these, if you only have problems with half of the words.

[03:05:05] Right.

[03:05:05] That's half the battle already won.

[03:05:08] Yeah.

[03:05:08] And plus you're telling the kid like, oh my God, you're doing so good.

[03:05:12] I thought you weren't going to know any of these, but you already know half of them.

[03:05:16] Right.

[03:05:16] That's awesome.

[03:05:17] And then we would just concentrate on the other 10.

[03:05:19] Yeah.

[03:05:19] That makes sense.

[03:05:21] Right.

[03:05:21] Like I am not exactly the smartest cookie in the jar.

[03:05:25] I don't know why I can come up with that.

[03:05:27] And, you know, actual people with master's degrees couldn't.

[03:05:32] It's something inherently wrong in the system.

[03:05:34] Yeah.

[03:05:35] You know, that's an entirely different.

[03:05:37] So do we have anything else to add about the Bible?

[03:05:40] No, I'll stop.

[03:05:44] All right.

[03:05:45] So that finishes us out for Joel.

[03:05:47] Bye, Joel.

[03:05:48] Yeah.

[03:05:48] And I will be the weekly wrap up will be coming out tomorrow.

[03:05:51] You may have noticed that things are a little behind.

[03:05:55] So basically we're going to be starting the new book midweek ish.

[03:05:59] Right.

[03:06:00] And we're just not going to worry about it because we fell behind and this allows us time

[03:06:04] to get the things we need done done.

[03:06:06] And it's standard for us at this point.

[03:06:08] And we're just not going to feel bad and beat ourselves up.

[03:06:11] We're just going to do our best to keep showing up.

[03:06:13] Well, and the problem is that when we release an episode, when we do like the multiple releases

[03:06:17] on the same day, we still just end up falling back behind because we were already behind.

[03:06:21] Right.

[03:06:22] So it doesn't make any sense to do that.

[03:06:24] Exactly.

[03:06:24] So we're just going to go from here.

[03:06:26] Yep.

[03:06:26] And move forward.

[03:06:27] And it be what it be.

[03:06:28] And it be what it be.

[03:06:29] Yep.

[03:06:30] All right.

[03:06:30] Well, thank you guys so much for listening to us rant about everything.

[03:06:35] As I do.

[03:06:36] And we will be back, like I said, tomorrow with the weekly wrap up.

[03:06:41] And then we'll be back after that with the first book of...

[03:06:47] I can't remember his name.

[03:06:49] No, like I've looked at it three different times.

[03:06:53] The first time you asked me, I couldn't remember.

[03:06:55] And it came up in chat.

[03:06:57] It was in our live Discord.

[03:06:59] Yeah.

[03:06:59] And some of our fun Discord listeners helpfully put it.

[03:07:04] And like I saw it, but it would not stick in my head.

[03:07:06] Is it Amos?

[03:07:07] Maybe?

[03:07:08] I'm looking it up right now so that we can tell everybody.

[03:07:11] Okay.

[03:07:11] But it is Amos.

[03:07:12] Yes.

[03:07:13] Oh my God.

[03:07:13] Yeah.

[03:07:14] It finally stuck.

[03:07:15] So we'll, like I said, weekly wrap up.

[03:07:17] And then the first chapter of Amos will be coming up after that.

[03:07:20] I might even remember it.

[03:07:22] You might.

[03:07:22] Huh.

[03:07:23] You might.

[03:07:24] Yeah.

[03:07:24] We'll see how that goes.

[03:07:25] Okay.

[03:07:26] Yeah.

[03:07:27] All right.

[03:07:27] Thanks, everybody.

[03:07:28] Bye.

[03:07:29] Bye.

[03:07:36] Wife.

[03:07:37] Do you know what we're doing today?

[03:07:39] Well, we're doing a special episode.

[03:07:42] Of Patreon.

[03:07:43] That's right.

[03:07:45] And to be fair, I don't really know what we're covering today.

[03:07:48] So why don't you lead into this and let everyone know?

[03:07:51] All right.

[03:07:51] Well, you know how I'm an avid podcast listener?

[03:07:55] I do.

[03:07:56] Yes.

[03:07:56] Yes.

[03:07:57] You listen to so many podcasts.

[03:07:58] I do.

[03:07:59] And mostly newsy ones, but also like, who cares?

[03:08:04] No, no, no.

[03:08:04] But I have to throw a tidbit in here because you're going to have to fill in the speed.

[03:08:08] But wife doesn't just listen to podcasts.

[03:08:09] She listens to them at 1.8 speed for the most.

[03:08:14] 1.8 speed.

[03:08:15] Yeah.

[03:08:15] I've worked up to that, though.

[03:08:16] I fucking hate it.

[03:08:17] Oh, yeah.

[03:08:18] I mean, you don't just like walk up and be like, hey, I think out of the blue, I'll start

[03:08:21] listening.

[03:08:22] I'll go from 1 to 1.8.

[03:08:24] It sounds like you have to work up to it.

[03:08:27] It sounds like audio insanity to me.

[03:08:29] That's because you haven't worked up to it.

[03:08:32] No, I didn't start there.

[03:08:33] Look, if you are going to try to work yourself up in speed, start at 1.3 or 1.4 because you

[03:08:41] can't really tell the difference much between just 1 and 1.3 or 4.

[03:08:45] Really?

[03:08:46] Yeah.

[03:08:46] Okay.

[03:08:46] It's about the same.

[03:08:48] Okay.

[03:08:48] And then once you become comfortable with that, then you can move it up to 5 or 6,

[03:08:54] 0.5 or 0.6, you know?

[03:08:55] Got it.

[03:08:56] Yeah.

[03:08:57] Okay.

[03:08:57] And it depends, too.

[03:08:59] Like, the ones that don't have an accent or, like, some hosts talk really fast, like,

[03:09:05] generally speaking, it's 1.8.

[03:09:07] But there are several that I do slow down, and I'm doing that in quotes, to 1.6.

[03:09:12] I just feel like you would lose some of the nuance in the talk.

[03:09:15] Well, see, and that's what I'm saying.

[03:09:16] It depends.

[03:09:16] Like, if it's news, because I listen to so much news and a lot of it is repetitive,

[03:09:21] I listen to almost all of those at 1.8 because I'm, like, just trying to pick up the gist.

[03:09:27] Sure.

[03:09:27] Right?

[03:09:27] But if I'm, like, listening to, say, something that's about writing, like, the writerly author

[03:09:36] type wordy words.

[03:09:38] How to author.

[03:09:40] How to write.

[03:09:41] How to write.

[03:09:41] How to do the things on the paper.

[03:09:42] Yeah.

[03:09:42] Yeah.

[03:09:43] Well, that I'm actually studying.

[03:09:45] And so I will slow that down to, like, 1.5.

[03:09:48] Okay.

[03:09:49] Because I'm trying to take in each word.

[03:09:53] Got it.

[03:09:54] So it just depends.

[03:09:55] But anyway.

[03:09:55] Yeah.

[03:09:56] That's all beside the point.

[03:09:57] It is.

[03:09:57] Lengthy intro.

[03:09:59] Right.

[03:09:59] So one of the episodes that I came upon was from the Washington Post opinion columnists.

[03:10:08] They have their own little corner of the world called Impromptu.

[03:10:13] Okay.

[03:10:14] And this particular episode was about the decline in the babbies of the world.

[03:10:21] Like.

[03:10:22] I'm sorry.

[03:10:22] What?

[03:10:23] Babbies.

[03:10:23] Babies.

[03:10:24] Okay.

[03:10:25] Got it.

[03:10:26] So the birth rates are declining.

[03:10:27] Yeah.

[03:10:27] And whether that's an emergency or not.

[03:10:29] Okay.

[03:10:30] And then in my funny little brain, I was like, ha, ha, ha, ha.

[03:10:34] That's completely opposite of be fruitful and multiply.

[03:10:37] Right.

[03:10:37] And then I was like, oh, we're looking for a topic.

[03:10:41] Yeah.

[03:10:42] And so I was like, got it.

[03:10:43] Got it.

[03:10:44] So that's what we're doing.

[03:10:45] You got some good information.

[03:10:46] I did.

[03:10:47] To link the two things.

[03:10:48] Yeah.

[03:10:48] Yeah.

[03:10:49] Okay.

[03:10:49] I do.

[03:10:50] I did.

[03:10:50] I do.

[03:10:51] And so I wrote a little essay on it.

[03:10:53] Oh.

[03:10:54] Yeah.

[03:10:54] Okay.

[03:10:55] Okay.

[03:10:55] And then I went through with my purple marker and I highlighted it all to fuck.

[03:11:01] I see.

[03:11:01] Yeah.

[03:11:02] Well, so that is what we are discussing today on our Patreon only episode.

[03:11:07] So if you are not a patron, you're going to hear a little bit of a teaser today and

[03:11:12] then it's going to cut off at some point and we're going to be like, sorry.

[03:11:16] So if you want to hear the rest of this, you can always go over to patreon.com forward slash

[03:11:21] sacrilegious discourse and you can sign up for as little as $2 a month and receive all

[03:11:27] of our episodes ad free and receive our special Patreon episodes.

[03:11:32] Yes.

[03:11:32] Right.

[03:11:32] And then we do these every other week.

[03:11:35] But here's the other thing.

[03:11:37] You've got one other way you can catch these episodes and you don't have to pay a dime.

[03:11:41] Right.

[03:11:41] What is that way?

[03:11:42] That way is to go to Patreon and no, no, no, nope.

[03:11:47] Oh, to show up on Wednesdays.

[03:11:49] Where?

[03:11:50] At Discord.

[03:11:51] At Discord.

[03:11:52] Yes.

[03:11:53] Okay.

[03:11:53] Sorry.

[03:11:54] Discord.

[03:11:54] We're going to go to Discord now.

[03:11:56] Okay.

[03:11:56] So I thought there was like a trial.

[03:11:58] Did that thing end or something?

[03:12:00] Trial for what?

[03:12:01] I thought there was a Patreon trial thing.

[03:12:03] Did that end?

[03:12:04] Yeah.

[03:12:04] Yeah.

[03:12:05] The trial.

[03:12:05] I ended the trials back when we went to the Kentucky Free Thought Convention because.

[03:12:10] Oh, that was a long time ago.

[03:12:12] We were going to use it as like a.

[03:12:13] I'm not in a loop.

[03:12:13] Whatever.

[03:12:14] There was a thing.

[03:12:14] I'll probably bring trials back at some point.

[03:12:16] Okay.

[03:12:16] Well, that's why I was saying that.

[03:12:18] But there's no trials on Patreon right now.

[03:12:19] Don't go there for a trial.

[03:12:20] Don't go there.

[03:12:20] Nope.

[03:12:21] Nope.

[03:12:22] Wednesdays, Discord at 10 p.m. Eastern to hear us live and to yak with us and all of our

[03:12:29] friends in our little Discord group.

[03:12:31] Yes.

[03:12:31] And it's so much fun.

[03:12:31] And the link will be in the show notes as always on every new episode.

[03:12:35] And you can be as dumb as I am and it's fine because there's people that'll help you.

[03:12:40] Exactly.

[03:12:41] Although for me, there's just never enough help.

[03:12:43] Clearly.

[03:12:45] All right.

[03:12:46] Are you ready to get into this episode?

[03:12:47] Yeah, let's.

[03:12:48] Let's do it.

[03:12:49] All right.

[03:12:51] All right.

[03:12:55] We are hopping into our Patreon.

[03:12:58] Okay.

[03:12:59] And doing what I called this essay, Be Fruitful and Don't Multiply.

[03:13:05] I like that.

[03:13:06] Yeah.

[03:13:07] That's good titling.

[03:13:08] Right.

[03:13:08] You did a good job there.

[03:13:09] I made that up myself.

[03:13:11] I did not.

[03:13:12] You get full props on that.

[03:13:12] That's probably going to be the title.

[03:13:14] I did not use any AI for that at all.

[03:13:17] Congratulations.

[03:13:18] Just so you know.

[03:13:19] You win today.

[03:13:20] And like, it was my first immediate thought.

[03:13:22] Yeah.

[03:13:23] No, I like it.

[03:13:23] Okay.

[03:13:24] Yeah.

[03:13:24] Okay.

[03:13:24] It's good stuff.

[03:13:25] Cool.

[03:13:25] Cool.

[03:13:25] Cool.

[03:13:26] Okay.

[03:13:27] And the don't is in parentheses.

[03:13:29] That's why I read it that way.

[03:13:29] Got it.

[03:13:30] Yeah.

[03:13:30] Be fruitful and don't multiply.

[03:13:32] Right.

[03:13:33] Okay.

[03:13:33] Well, I mean, this is not a visual thing.

[03:13:36] Right.

[03:13:36] So you had to say the parentheses out loud.

[03:13:38] Right.

[03:13:38] Yeah.

[03:13:39] Parentheses voice.

[03:13:41] All right.

[03:13:42] Here we go.

[03:13:43] And just jump in.

[03:13:44] Like, I'm going to read the essay that I wrote and you just jump in.

[03:13:46] Just do like we always do, you mean?

[03:13:48] Yes.

[03:13:49] Exactly.

[03:13:50] Exactly.

[03:13:51] Okay.

[03:13:51] All right.

[03:13:52] In recent years.

[03:13:53] Recent years.

[03:13:54] There has been increasing concern over declining birth rates, both in the United States and globally.

[03:14:01] I don't really understand why it's a concern.

[03:14:04] Yeah.

[03:14:04] I don't either.

[03:14:05] I'm like, okay, that opens up more jobs.

[03:14:07] There's less resources we have to use.

[03:14:09] I'll get into that.

[03:14:09] There are actually a few good reasons that I had not considered because I hadn't really considered.

[03:14:15] Okay.

[03:14:15] All right.

[03:14:15] Like, who cares?

[03:14:16] Less babies.

[03:14:17] Oh, well.

[03:14:18] Wah, wah.

[03:14:18] Right?

[03:14:19] Right.

[03:14:19] But there are actually implications of problems that could ensue from that.

[03:14:25] Okay.

[03:14:25] Sure.

[03:14:35] Less alarm.

[03:14:36] Often framing this trend as a crisis.

[03:14:40] It's worth asking if fewer babies really is a problem.

[03:14:43] It is.

[03:14:44] I agree.

[03:14:44] Which is what you just did.

[03:14:45] Yeah.

[03:14:45] And the reason that I am stressing some words is because I really liked that I was like,

[03:14:51] increasing concern, declining birth rates, expressing alarm, framing this trend as a crisis.

[03:14:59] Like, it's so dramatic, right?

[03:15:01] Like, we're all going to hell in a hand basket.

[03:15:04] Right.

[03:15:04] Jesus fucking Christ.

[03:15:06] Yeah.

[03:15:06] When will this end?

[03:15:08] Yeah.

[03:15:08] Okay.

[03:15:09] When we step away, economic anxieties and cultural nostalgia.

[03:15:15] I really like that.

[03:15:16] Yeah.

[03:15:16] What emerges is a more complex story about evolving values and shifting priorities.

[03:15:23] Okay.

[03:15:23] Right?

[03:15:24] Yeah.

[03:15:24] Because our values have changed and our priorities have shifted.

[03:15:27] I mean, you know, the way I see it is that we have a lot, like, we're basically walking

[03:15:32] into a dystopia, right?

[03:15:35] Right?

[03:15:35] Our whole society is walking into a not too far in the distant future dystopia.

[03:15:41] Yeah.

[03:15:41] Right?

[03:15:41] Somehow, some way.

[03:15:42] Yeah.

[03:15:43] We are going to be fucked soon.

[03:15:45] Like, that's just the way things are going.

[03:15:47] Right.

[03:15:48] And from what I have heard from many of the younger generation, they're like, why would

[03:15:52] I want to bring a kid into this shit?

[03:15:54] Right.

[03:15:55] Well, what I find funny is that, like, just 10 years ago, they were like, oh, my God,

[03:15:59] we're going to grow too many people and there won't be enough resources.

[03:16:02] And that's when the preppers came out and they're like, I'll have my resources.

[03:16:06] We won't be able to feed everybody because there's too many people.

[03:16:10] Well, and I do question because I think we are still growing too fast for a world population.

[03:16:16] The world population is also going down.

[03:16:19] The world population is going down.

[03:16:20] Really?

[03:16:20] Mm-hmm.

[03:16:21] The birth rate.

[03:16:22] Huh.

[03:16:22] Not population.

[03:16:22] But the birth rate globally is decreasing.

[03:16:25] Okay.

[03:16:26] Yeah.

[03:16:26] I will cite my sources in the notes.

[03:16:29] Got it.

[03:16:29] Okay.

[03:16:30] Yeah.

[03:16:31] So, yeah, that's why I was like, well, which one is it, guys?

[03:16:35] Is it that we aren't going to have enough resources to feed all of us?

[03:16:39] Or is it we're all going to die out and there won't be any more humans left?

[03:16:43] Sure.

[03:16:43] Like, both?

[03:16:44] Yeah.

[03:16:45] Simultaneously.

[03:16:46] Right.

[03:16:46] You know, kind of like the, there's a meme that I actually showed Kit today, Schrodinger's

[03:16:53] immigrant.

[03:16:54] Oh.

[03:16:57] The Schrodinger's, how do you say it?

[03:16:59] Schrodinger?

[03:17:00] Yeah.

[03:17:01] Schrodinger's immigrant is both a lazy individual, you know, milking off the government, sucking

[03:17:09] at the government teat, taking government monies while they're lazy and do nothing.

[03:17:13] But they're also stealing all the jobs.

[03:17:15] Right.

[03:17:16] They're both.

[03:17:17] You do know that it's Schrodinger's cat.

[03:17:19] Yes.

[03:17:19] Okay.

[03:17:19] I just want to make sure.

[03:17:20] I do know that.

[03:17:21] That's why.

[03:17:22] I didn't know.

[03:17:23] I just didn't know how to pronounce it.

[03:17:25] Well, I'm not sure we're pronouncing it correctly right now, even.

[03:17:27] Right.

[03:17:28] But we're trying real hard to do it.

[03:17:31] I just want to make sure.

[03:17:32] It's two things.

[03:17:33] It's existing and not existing simultaneously.

[03:17:35] Right.

[03:17:36] Yes.

[03:17:36] I was trying to make sure that the audience knew.

[03:17:39] Oh, I didn't realize that.

[03:17:40] I'm sorry.

[03:17:41] Okay.

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