Gilgamesh: The Epic Tale Unveiled

[00:00:00] Welcome to Sacrilegious Discourse.

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[00:00:21] I am capable of empathy greater than this God of the Bible.

[00:00:26] This is a Bible that they tell kids.

[00:00:29] This is the good Lord. This is the good book.

[00:00:32] He is fantasizing about murder, mass murder.

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[00:00:48] Wife!

[00:00:49] I remembered what to say that time.

[00:00:51] You did, because the last time we started this you didn't.

[00:00:53] I didn't, but I'm good now. I'm good now.

[00:00:56] Do you know what we're doing today?

[00:00:58] Well, this is not a Patreon only, but it is a special episode.

[00:01:03] A bonus. It's a bonus.

[00:01:04] Yeah.

[00:01:05] Yeah.

[00:01:05] So, what are we special episode-ing today?

[00:01:08] It's time to talk about Gilgamesh.

[00:01:11] Oh, we've talked about him a few times already.

[00:01:12] He's come up, but we haven't talked about him.

[00:01:15] Yeah.

[00:01:15] We have mentioned his name.

[00:01:17] Yeah.

[00:01:17] And we've been like, oh, wasn't he like one of the original flood guys or something?

[00:01:21] Didn't he do a thing?

[00:01:22] Some of the stories are like Bible-adjacent type things, right?

[00:01:26] Like, didn't the Bible-y thing borrow some shit from him or something?

[00:01:29] I don't know.

[00:01:30] It seems that way, right?

[00:01:31] Yeah.

[00:01:31] As we're reading through and finding stuff out.

[00:01:33] And so, I was like, I saw his name.

[00:01:36] It came up just one too many times and I was like, it's time to talk about Gilgamesh.

[00:01:40] What the fuck did you do, Gilgamesh?

[00:01:43] Yeah, what did you do, Gilgamesh?

[00:01:44] Okay.

[00:01:45] Let's do this.

[00:01:46] Okie dokie.

[00:01:53] Okie, so it's time to talk about Gilgamesh, but I have a confession to make.

[00:01:58] Do ya?

[00:01:59] Yeah.

[00:01:59] A few times throughout my notes, I accidentally wrote Gargamel.

[00:02:05] Because it, they have...

[00:02:07] I mean, Smurfs, you know...

[00:02:08] Well, Gar-ga and Gil-ga.

[00:02:11] Like, there's two G's in both of them that...

[00:02:13] Gargamel is Smurfs, right?

[00:02:14] Gil-ga.

[00:02:15] Yeah.

[00:02:15] Yeah, he's the bad guy.

[00:02:16] I was making sure I was right about that.

[00:02:17] Yeah, I can't remember.

[00:02:18] And then, and then there's this first Christmas special,

[00:02:21] Goodness makes the badness go away.

[00:02:23] Clap, clap, clap, clap, clap, clap, clap, clap.

[00:02:25] Goodness makes the badness go away.

[00:02:29] You know?

[00:02:29] I mean, I do now.

[00:02:31] And then they're singing around the fire and it makes the fire go down.

[00:02:34] Because goodness makes the badness go...

[00:02:36] Yeah.

[00:02:36] Because fire is bad?

[00:02:37] Well, the fire was gonna burn them.

[00:02:39] Oh.

[00:02:40] That was bad.

[00:02:40] That kind of fire is bad.

[00:02:41] Yeah.

[00:02:42] Okay.

[00:02:42] Yeah.

[00:02:43] That's fair.

[00:02:44] And Gilgamesh was like, don't let me die in this circle of fire.

[00:02:48] He's so bad.

[00:02:49] Right.

[00:02:49] Not Gilgamesh.

[00:02:50] Oh, I didn't see how I called him Gilgamesh.

[00:02:53] No, he's Gargamel.

[00:02:54] Yeah, Gargamel.

[00:02:55] And so, I'm just letting you know now, I will be using those terms interchangeably and

[00:03:01] just go with it.

[00:03:02] Oh my God.

[00:03:02] But here is another name I will use interchangeably that's not my fault.

[00:03:09] Ishtar and Inanna are the same girl.

[00:03:13] Mm.

[00:03:13] It just depends, like, are we talking Arcadia or Sumerian?

[00:03:17] I feel like we talked about this one other time.

[00:03:18] We did.

[00:03:19] Okay.

[00:03:19] More than once.

[00:03:20] All right.

[00:03:20] Yeah.

[00:03:21] I brought that up before.

[00:03:22] But, like, I'm going through different, you know, sources and sometimes she's called

[00:03:27] this and sometimes she's called that.

[00:03:28] And like I said, it just depends on which Mesopotamian area you're looking at.

[00:03:36] Okay.

[00:03:36] And, like, barely years apart, you know?

[00:03:39] Yeah.

[00:03:39] So, okay.

[00:03:40] Just letting you guys know.

[00:03:41] Sometimes you will hear one name that magically changes into another name and just don't sweat

[00:03:46] it.

[00:03:46] You're not crazy.

[00:03:47] It's me.

[00:03:48] Right.

[00:03:48] If it starts with a G, it's all Gilgamesh.

[00:03:50] Yeah.

[00:03:51] And if it starts with an I, it's all Ishtar?

[00:03:57] It, so it's, yeah, whatever.

[00:03:59] Okay.

[00:04:00] Okay.

[00:04:00] Isn't that what we know her as now today?

[00:04:02] I don't know.

[00:04:03] Mostly we call her Ishtar now, I think.

[00:04:05] I don't call her shit because I don't know who she is exactly anymore.

[00:04:08] I remember we talked about her one other time, but.

[00:04:09] She's some goddess.

[00:04:10] That's all I really know about her.

[00:04:11] She's always around.

[00:04:12] She's just some goddess.

[00:04:13] She's always around.

[00:04:13] I mean, she's just, she's a lurker.

[00:04:15] She's a lurker.

[00:04:16] Okay.

[00:04:17] I'm pretty sure she was like a pick-meat girl.

[00:04:20] Mm, okay.

[00:04:21] You know?

[00:04:21] Cause her name is, it's like, yeah, we all know you Ishtar, okay.

[00:04:26] Got it.

[00:04:27] You know?

[00:04:27] Okay.

[00:04:28] Alright.

[00:04:28] So today we're gonna talk about Gargamel.

[00:04:32] No.

[00:04:32] A dude who was probably a bit of a jerk, but also kind of fascinating.

[00:04:37] Okay.

[00:04:38] You ready for this?

[00:04:39] Sure.

[00:04:39] Okay.

[00:04:40] Gilgamesh is the protagonist of boom, boom, boom.

[00:04:44] The epic of Gilgamesh.

[00:04:46] I, you know, I could, I guess I probably could have guessed that.

[00:04:49] And when I'm saying epic, I'm not using the term in the Bill and Ted way, like epic.

[00:04:55] Yes.

[00:04:55] I'm using it as like long, um, rolling story thingy.

[00:05:02] Right.

[00:05:02] You know?

[00:05:03] That covers many years and much ground.

[00:05:05] Okay.

[00:05:06] An epic.

[00:05:07] An epic saga.

[00:05:08] Got it.

[00:05:09] And Gilgamesh is the star.

[00:05:10] Okay.

[00:05:11] Um, yeah.

[00:05:12] So it's an epic poem that was written originally in Acadia during the late second millennium BCE.

[00:05:21] Oh, wow.

[00:05:21] Yeah.

[00:05:22] This bitch is old.

[00:05:24] Right.

[00:05:24] Okay.

[00:05:24] Okay.

[00:05:25] All right.

[00:05:25] So let's talk about the dude for a minute.

[00:05:27] Gilgamesh.

[00:05:28] Okay.

[00:05:28] I've got several different categories.

[00:05:29] We're going to talk about the dude.

[00:05:31] We're going to talk about the story.

[00:05:32] Like they're separate things.

[00:05:34] Okay.

[00:05:34] Because Gilgamesh actually was a guy.

[00:05:37] I mean, as far as we know from stories.

[00:05:40] Um, there are several different sources that suggest that he was actually a king guy

[00:05:45] that lived.

[00:05:46] Okay.

[00:05:46] Back in those days.

[00:05:47] Got it.

[00:05:48] So he was probably a historical king of the city, Uruk, which is a city in ancient Mesopotamia

[00:05:55] in what is now modern day Iraq.

[00:05:58] Okay.

[00:05:59] And then it's like, I just said, wait, what man, king, God.

[00:06:03] Yeah.

[00:06:03] Who is he?

[00:06:04] What is he?

[00:06:04] I don't get it.

[00:06:05] Right.

[00:06:05] Yes.

[00:06:05] Yes.

[00:06:06] And yes.

[00:06:08] So he was likely one of those conquering guys.

[00:06:11] He's like, let's all go fight.

[00:06:13] Right.

[00:06:13] And then when his team won, he's like, yeah.

[00:06:16] Yeah.

[00:06:17] And then he leveled up from human soldier boy to, um, human king dude.

[00:06:22] As you do.

[00:06:23] And, and, and those times, those times.

[00:06:25] Yeah.

[00:06:25] When you kill a lot of bad guys and sack their city, then you're like, I'm the boss.

[00:06:30] You can, apparently you can promote your waste all the way to God.

[00:06:33] They let you do it.

[00:06:34] If you're a star, they let you do it.

[00:06:36] And he was a star.

[00:06:38] Yeah.

[00:06:38] So, um, so that was on him.

[00:06:41] Okay.

[00:06:41] He's like, I was just a human.

[00:06:43] Now I'm a human king guy.

[00:06:44] Got it.

[00:06:45] Okay.

[00:06:45] Yeah.

[00:06:46] Then he was probably posthumously deified.

[00:06:50] I see.

[00:06:51] Meaning after he died, eventually at some point they were like, you know what?

[00:06:54] I think that guy might've been a God.

[00:06:56] Uh.

[00:06:57] Why?

[00:06:57] Who knows?

[00:06:58] Maybe he kept his dick to himself, which probably would have gone over well with his

[00:07:03] underlings.

[00:07:04] I guess.

[00:07:05] Yeah.

[00:07:05] Cause everybody was rapey back then.

[00:07:06] Or maybe he didn't.

[00:07:07] And he had so many kids that, you know, they just carried on the tradition for him.

[00:07:11] He turned down Ishtar.

[00:07:12] So.

[00:07:13] Oh, okay.

[00:07:13] All right.

[00:07:14] But it could have also been because his city was fucking awesome.

[00:07:18] Hmm.

[00:07:18] Okay.

[00:07:18] Okay.

[00:07:19] Let's talk about his fucking city, the city of Uruk.

[00:07:21] Yeah.

[00:07:22] Um, it's known today as Warka and it was an ancient city in the near East located east

[00:07:28] of the current bed of the Euphrates river, the current bed.

[00:07:33] Okay.

[00:07:33] Yeah.

[00:07:33] And this matters.

[00:07:34] Okay.

[00:07:35] On an ancient now dried channel of the river.

[00:07:39] Okay.

[00:07:39] Which is sad because you're going to hear how wonderful it was.

[00:07:42] Got it.

[00:07:43] The city, which is named for its king at, at that time, you're, you're that king guy.

[00:07:48] Yeah.

[00:07:48] Flourished briefly, but did not maintain significance in the long run.

[00:07:53] Like it kind of had a like flame that would like flame on and then kind of like die out.

[00:07:57] And then it was like flame up and then it would die out.

[00:08:00] Okay.

[00:08:00] And eventually it just like burned itself out.

[00:08:02] It was like.

[00:08:03] It sounds like the river kind of moved.

[00:08:05] Exactly.

[00:08:06] So.

[00:08:06] That's exactly like the majority of what happened.

[00:08:08] Right.

[00:08:09] Yeah.

[00:08:09] Yeah.

[00:08:09] So Urich, the city was extremely well irrigated by a canal system that has been described

[00:08:15] as Venice in the desert.

[00:08:18] Really?

[00:08:19] That's how well it, the water way worked so well.

[00:08:23] Listen to this.

[00:08:24] In 2000 BCE.

[00:08:25] Mm hmm.

[00:08:26] Really?

[00:08:26] Yeah.

[00:08:27] Interesting.

[00:08:27] This canal system flowed throughout the city, connecting it with maritime trade on the

[00:08:33] ancient Euphrates river, as well as with the astounding agricultural belt.

[00:08:38] Um, I want to take back what I just said.

[00:08:40] I don't think they referred to it as Venice in the desert.

[00:08:43] We refer to it now.

[00:08:45] We're like this city was so cool.

[00:08:47] It was like Venice in the desert.

[00:08:50] Got it.

[00:08:50] Yeah.

[00:08:51] Sorry.

[00:08:52] Um, when you said, Oh, really?

[00:08:53] Um, I, it didn't like play well.

[00:08:57] I had to like re what is that word?

[00:08:59] Like re type the words and try again.

[00:09:02] Sure.

[00:09:03] And I was just saying that I think that like, you know, that to have a

[00:09:08] level of sophistication in the city.

[00:09:10] Yes.

[00:09:11] In those times was pretty significant.

[00:09:13] This city was fucking badass.

[00:09:15] Right.

[00:09:15] Like literally badass.

[00:09:18] The Uruk, though Uruk experienced periods of prominence, the city eventually lost its

[00:09:25] prime importance.

[00:09:25] Like I said, eventually the candle went out like flames in the wind.

[00:09:31] Never knowing, you know, I know.

[00:09:33] No, I don't.

[00:09:34] I don't know what you're talking.

[00:09:35] Okay.

[00:09:36] Yeah.

[00:09:37] I'd have to hear the candle in the wind.

[00:09:39] Got it.

[00:09:39] Okay.

[00:09:40] Until it was finally abandoned shortly before or after the Islamic conquest of 633 to 638.

[00:09:49] Okay.

[00:09:50] Not BCE.

[00:09:51] Got it.

[00:09:52] Yeah.

[00:09:52] So at that point it was like, um, we're just done now.

[00:09:55] We, we've done a good run several thousand years, but the Islamic conquest is here now

[00:10:02] and we just were done.

[00:10:04] Okay.

[00:10:04] Okay.

[00:10:05] So the original city of Uruk was situated southwest of the ancient Euphrates river.

[00:10:11] Now dry.

[00:10:12] Currently the site of Warka, like I already said, is northeast of the modern Euphrates

[00:10:16] river.

[00:10:17] Okay.

[00:10:17] Okay.

[00:10:17] The change in position as you guessed was caused by a shift in the Euphrates at some

[00:10:23] point in history.

[00:10:24] Yeah.

[00:10:24] Because I don't know if y'all know this, but rivers fucking shift.

[00:10:27] Yeah.

[00:10:28] That's why there's like, uh, they actually put up cement on the sides of the Mississippi

[00:10:32] to keep the river from shifting.

[00:10:34] They're like, you stay here, you stay.

[00:10:36] And at least in a lot of places anyway.

[00:10:38] Maybe not the whole thing, but you know.

[00:10:41] Just the important bits.

[00:10:42] Right.

[00:10:42] The rest can go where it may.

[00:10:44] Cause it has a lot of tributaries.

[00:10:45] Right.

[00:10:45] So, um, okay.

[00:10:48] At some point in history, um, that the, the move over time of the, um, river together

[00:10:55] with salination due to irrigation may have contributed to the decline of Uruk.

[00:11:01] I'm going to say it did decline, but there was other stuff too.

[00:11:05] Um, it just, it was, it could not keep up.

[00:11:08] Yeah.

[00:11:09] Okay.

[00:11:09] I get it.

[00:11:10] Scholars identify Uruk as the biblical Erek, E-R-E-C-H, which is a city mentioned in Genesis

[00:11:17] chapter 10.

[00:11:18] Huh.

[00:11:19] Okay.

[00:11:19] I don't know if you remember Erek, but that was the second city founded by Nimrod, your

[00:11:25] favorite guy.

[00:11:26] Oh, okay.

[00:11:27] All right.

[00:11:27] You know, he went out and founded some cities.

[00:11:29] Yeah.

[00:11:30] Um, so some scholars are like, you know, Hey, um,

[00:11:35] So that's where Nimrod gets compared to Gilgamesh, which I think we talked about back when we were

[00:11:38] talking about Nimrod.

[00:11:39] I think so.

[00:11:40] So, okay.

[00:11:41] All right.

[00:11:41] So, um, the, there's some question who founded this fucking city is what I'm getting at.

[00:11:46] Sure.

[00:11:46] It was either Nimrod or Uruk.

[00:11:50] Got it.

[00:11:50] You know?

[00:11:51] Yeah.

[00:11:51] Like whatever.

[00:11:52] It is believed that the city of Uruk, however, might've been founded by the king and

[00:11:59] Enmir car.

[00:12:00] Okay.

[00:12:01] Okay.

[00:12:01] Sure.

[00:12:02] And then I wrote this.

[00:12:03] That is not confusing at all.

[00:12:05] Not at all.

[00:12:05] No.

[00:12:06] So basically there's a city and we don't know who the fuck.

[00:12:10] Somebody fucking founded it.

[00:12:11] Yeah.

[00:12:11] Yeah.

[00:12:11] And, um, Nimrod was around at the time and, um, our boy Gilgamesh was coming on the scene.

[00:12:18] Right.

[00:12:18] Right.

[00:12:19] So the Sumerian king list, which one of the sources I was reading just like threw this

[00:12:24] out, you know, that, um, SKL, you know, Sumerian king list.

[00:12:30] Yeah.

[00:12:30] Everybody knows that.

[00:12:31] Yeah.

[00:12:32] I was like, wait, what?

[00:12:33] So like I had to open like several different tabs.

[00:12:36] Cause, um, every time I learned a new thing, I had to go learn what that was.

[00:12:40] Cause this was like not an easy research.

[00:12:43] Right.

[00:12:43] It was fun and interesting.

[00:12:45] But what's a Sumerian king list?

[00:12:46] You ask?

[00:12:47] No idea.

[00:12:48] Ask it.

[00:12:48] What's a Sumerian king list.

[00:12:50] Okay.

[00:12:50] Well, what's an SKL?

[00:12:51] Yeah.

[00:12:52] SKL is literally like, that's what it's referred to as by scholars.

[00:12:56] Like they just toss it out like lingo.

[00:12:58] Right.

[00:12:59] Like that's what it is.

[00:13:00] Yeah.

[00:13:00] But a few times I accidentally wrote SNL and then I thought about it.

[00:13:05] And if we're talking about like a night and shining, shining armor, it's still Saturday

[00:13:10] night live just with a K instead of an N boom.

[00:13:15] Yeah.

[00:13:16] Saturday can night life, you know?

[00:13:19] Yeah.

[00:13:20] All right.

[00:13:20] So the Sumerian king list or the SKL, this ancient literary composition that was written

[00:13:28] in Sumerian likely created and redacted to legitimize the claims of power of various city

[00:13:35] states and kingdoms and Southern Mississippi.

[00:13:36] I'm going to explain this in a minute.

[00:13:38] Okay.

[00:13:38] All right.

[00:13:38] During the late third and early second millennium BCE.

[00:13:42] So, okay.

[00:13:42] Way back when.

[00:13:44] Way back.

[00:13:44] Way back.

[00:13:46] That was, you know, Sumerian was writing shit down.

[00:13:50] Yeah.

[00:13:50] And they were like, okay, this city is getting passed down.

[00:13:53] We should write a list and keep track of who ruled it.

[00:13:57] That's what that is.

[00:13:58] Okay.

[00:13:58] So the SKL, the Sumerian king list is a list of kings literally.

[00:14:03] Okay.

[00:14:03] That ruled that.

[00:14:05] Got it.

[00:14:05] Yeah.

[00:14:05] Or that kept track of it.

[00:14:07] Sure.

[00:14:07] Okay.

[00:14:07] Yeah.

[00:14:08] So that SKL thing mentions a father before him, the epic Enmerkar.

[00:14:14] Okay.

[00:14:15] Uh huh.

[00:14:15] And in the SKL, the Lord of Arada, who's he?

[00:14:19] I don't know.

[00:14:19] The only time he comes up this entire thing.

[00:14:22] So, you know, that Lord.

[00:14:23] Yeah.

[00:14:23] No, no idea.

[00:14:24] He relates that Enmerkar constructed the house of heaven for the goddess Inanna, which

[00:14:32] is Ishtar in the Ianna district of Uruk.

[00:14:36] Okay.

[00:14:37] Okay.

[00:14:37] Yeah.

[00:14:37] Let me break that down.

[00:14:39] Okay.

[00:14:39] So, Uruk is the city, right?

[00:14:41] Yep.

[00:14:42] Um, it's got several different districts and each district is basically like your worship

[00:14:47] centers.

[00:14:48] Okay.

[00:14:49] So it's like how there's the city of Dayton, but then there's all these like little cities

[00:14:53] around it and in it and of it.

[00:14:55] Sure.

[00:14:56] Like you could say I live in Dayton if you're talking to somebody not in Ohio or even not

[00:15:01] in Dayton.

[00:15:02] But like if they're from Dayton too, they would be like, yeah, but where?

[00:15:06] Which part of Dayton?

[00:15:06] Yeah.

[00:15:07] And you would be like, I don't know, Miamisburg, Troy, you know, Springboro.

[00:15:12] Anywhere within a 50 mile radius basically.

[00:15:14] Yeah.

[00:15:14] Yeah.

[00:15:14] And you would name all these.

[00:15:15] Okay.

[00:15:15] So, okay.

[00:15:16] The littler cities that I just named off, those are districts.

[00:15:19] Okay.

[00:15:20] And each of those districts has its own like shrine and worship center to various, to that

[00:15:26] district's God or goddess.

[00:15:27] Okay.

[00:15:28] Okay.

[00:15:28] So the Iana district of Yurik is where the goddess Inanna or Ishtar was worshiped.

[00:15:36] Okay.

[00:15:37] And that kind of matters later because that district, like not only was Yurik awesome, the

[00:15:42] city as a whole, but this district in particular was where shit began.

[00:15:47] Okay.

[00:15:48] Like the magic.

[00:15:50] Where shit began.

[00:15:50] Like smart shit.

[00:15:52] Like.

[00:15:53] Smart shit.

[00:15:55] I have the best brain.

[00:15:56] I know all the words.

[00:15:58] Okay.

[00:15:58] All right.

[00:15:58] All right.

[00:15:59] Just hang with me.

[00:15:59] I'll get there.

[00:16:00] Okay.

[00:16:01] Oh, it's the next sentence.

[00:16:02] Look at that.

[00:16:03] Hey.

[00:16:03] The Inanna, I keep saying Inanna because her name is Inanna, but the district is Iana.

[00:16:10] Ah, yeah.

[00:16:11] That's not confusing at all.

[00:16:12] Ishtar.

[00:16:13] Let's just change everything to Ishtar.

[00:16:15] Okay.

[00:16:16] So the Ishtar district of Yurik is historically significant as both writing and monumental public

[00:16:25] architecture because those emerged from that exact place.

[00:16:30] Okay.

[00:16:31] The combination of these two developments places Iana as arguably the first true city and

[00:16:38] civilization in human history.

[00:16:41] I see.

[00:16:42] And it contains the earliest examples of writing.

[00:16:46] Do we know what civilization this was?

[00:16:49] Was this like the Sumerians or what was this?

[00:16:51] Mm-hmm.

[00:16:51] It was?

[00:16:52] Yeah.

[00:16:52] Okay.

[00:16:53] Yeah.

[00:16:54] You're sure about that?

[00:16:55] Um, yeah, because like there were all these different periods and they came and yeah.

[00:17:02] You know what?

[00:17:03] I'm going to take that back.

[00:17:03] If it wasn't them, it was the Arcadians.

[00:17:05] Okay.

[00:17:06] It was either the Sumerians or the Arcadians and I forget what order they came in.

[00:17:10] Okay.

[00:17:11] I knew it at one time this morning.

[00:17:13] Got it.

[00:17:14] And then I just forgot.

[00:17:15] But anyway, that district though, Ishtar's little district in Yurik.

[00:17:20] Yeah.

[00:17:20] Okay.

[00:17:21] So like, why am I talking about this city again?

[00:17:23] Wait, what?

[00:17:23] Who cares about this city?

[00:17:25] What?

[00:17:25] Sure.

[00:17:26] So remember, we're like Gilgamesh came around to this city and he's like, this is mine

[00:17:31] now.

[00:17:31] Okay.

[00:17:32] Okay.

[00:17:32] I'm a king now.

[00:17:33] What's up?

[00:17:34] Yeah.

[00:17:35] And it's a good city.

[00:17:36] Because he killed people.

[00:17:37] Yeah.

[00:17:37] Right.

[00:17:38] I mean, that's my guess.

[00:17:38] I don't know why he was made king.

[00:17:40] I mean, usually it had to do with killing people.

[00:17:41] Right.

[00:17:42] And I'm like, yeah, he leveled up.

[00:17:44] Sure.

[00:17:44] Yeah.

[00:17:45] Okay.

[00:17:45] So he's king of Yurik, whatever.

[00:17:47] Okay.

[00:17:47] Yeah.

[00:17:48] So, okay.

[00:17:49] We're done with city.

[00:17:50] Back to dude.

[00:17:51] Dude.

[00:17:52] Who was he?

[00:17:53] Who was Gilgamesh?

[00:17:54] I don't know.

[00:17:54] Who was he?

[00:17:55] Right.

[00:17:55] Okay.

[00:17:56] We're going to get to the God stories in a bit, but for now, let's just talk about

[00:18:00] the human king guy.

[00:18:01] Okay.

[00:18:01] Okay.

[00:18:02] Like I said, Gilgamesh was supposedly the king of Yurik, and that's why we just talked

[00:18:06] about that city.

[00:18:06] Right.

[00:18:07] Okay.

[00:18:07] This all took place somewhere around 2800 to 2500 BCE.

[00:18:14] Okay.

[00:18:14] Okay.

[00:18:15] Yeah.

[00:18:15] That's a long fucking time ago.

[00:18:17] Yeah.

[00:18:17] He's thought to have reigned for a real quick minute, just a casual 126 years, according

[00:18:24] to later scribes.

[00:18:25] That sounds a little unrealistic.

[00:18:28] I'm going to say you're right.

[00:18:29] But remember, like way back, before the flood, everybody lived several hundred years.

[00:18:37] Yeah.

[00:18:38] I remember the Bible says that.

[00:18:40] Right.

[00:18:40] Well, I don't actually believe that.

[00:18:43] They say it too.

[00:18:44] These guys say it too.

[00:18:46] Right.

[00:18:46] Okay.

[00:18:46] No, I'm not saying that I think that that's what happened.

[00:18:49] I'm saying for some reason, those early fucking people were like, we live so many centuries,

[00:18:56] all the best centuries.

[00:18:57] We have the most centuries here.

[00:18:59] I almost feel like the idea of long life was like the precursor to heaven.

[00:19:04] Right.

[00:19:05] You have this fascination with not dying.

[00:19:10] Right.

[00:19:10] And the afterlife.

[00:19:11] With living for a long time.

[00:19:12] Yeah.

[00:19:12] With extending human life.

[00:19:14] And also passing on your line to your firstborn son so that you are living on forever.

[00:19:22] Yeah.

[00:19:22] You know?

[00:19:23] No, I mean, there's so much involved with regard to religion in general about this fear of death

[00:19:29] and what's going to happen to you after you die.

[00:19:31] Yeah.

[00:19:31] And it all comes down to just basically men can't deal.

[00:19:36] I mean, people can't deal.

[00:19:38] Okay.

[00:19:38] But I wouldn't know because women didn't rule the world over there.

[00:19:42] No, no, no.

[00:19:42] I understand that.

[00:19:43] But I'm saying that death is still a thing that is very bothersome to many people across

[00:19:48] the board.

[00:19:48] Right.

[00:19:49] I mean, I'm not saying I want to fucking die.

[00:19:50] I don't want to die.

[00:19:51] No.

[00:19:52] But like, I don't spend my nights worrying about where am I going to go when I die?

[00:19:57] What if I die tomorrow?

[00:19:58] Oh my.

[00:20:00] You know, I don't do that.

[00:20:01] But when you are ignorant about what death means, when you are ignorant about the science,

[00:20:07] when you don't know an answer to something.

[00:20:10] Yeah.

[00:20:11] You want to fill it in with something that makes sense to you.

[00:20:14] You have to label it so you can explain it.

[00:20:16] Well, that feels good.

[00:20:16] Yeah.

[00:20:17] Yeah.

[00:20:17] Yeah.

[00:20:18] Yeah.

[00:20:18] Yeah.

[00:20:18] So, I mean, that's, you know, that's all.

[00:20:20] Yeah.

[00:20:20] I didn't have much to say.

[00:20:21] Just that.

[00:20:21] No, that's okay.

[00:20:22] So, yeah, he ruled 126 years.

[00:20:24] And lots of scribes said so, so it obviously must be true.

[00:20:28] I read it on the internet.

[00:20:29] I mean, if he lived 126 years, that's like one of the longest lives of like the last,

[00:20:33] right, you know, hundreds of years.

[00:20:35] But sure.

[00:20:36] Okay.

[00:20:36] Okay.

[00:20:37] Like I said, but what do we actually know for realsies?

[00:20:40] Sure.

[00:20:40] Nothing.

[00:20:41] Right.

[00:20:41] Not a whole lot, honestly.

[00:20:43] Mostly just like a messed up boomer type post on MySpace that someone quote tweeted,

[00:20:50] but the guy sharing the post didn't have an avatar, just one of those empty gray egg heads

[00:20:56] as his profile pic, so his account got blocked.

[00:20:59] But not before one of those SEO crawlers copied a blurry image of the janky screenshot of the

[00:21:04] retweeted MySpace post.

[00:21:05] And that is what ended up on the SNL.

[00:21:09] I'm sorry, what?

[00:21:10] I was trying to show a chain of like how we know a little bit, but it's all just this

[00:21:17] blurry image, like game of telephone.

[00:21:20] But I was, you know, using like who even uses MySpace?

[00:21:24] That's how old he is.

[00:21:25] Right.

[00:21:26] I mean, you lost some of our crowd with MySpace because they probably don't even know what

[00:21:29] the fuck it is.

[00:21:29] Only Bready.

[00:21:33] Okay.

[00:21:33] So anyway, when I said SNL, of course I meant the aforementioned Sumerian King list.

[00:21:39] All right.

[00:21:39] Yeah.

[00:21:40] Yeah.

[00:21:40] So I was just being goofy.

[00:21:42] Like it made sense when I wrote it to me.

[00:21:44] I just, I thought it was funny.

[00:21:46] I mean, sure.

[00:21:47] Yeah.

[00:21:47] If you have to explain it, it's not funny.

[00:21:49] So that was a fail and I accept that.

[00:21:51] I own it.

[00:21:52] Okay.

[00:21:53] Okay.

[00:21:53] So his name pops up there on that list.

[00:21:56] Yeah.

[00:21:57] With this weird mix of fact and fiction that ancient scribes used to keep track of various

[00:22:02] rulers down the line.

[00:22:04] Okay.

[00:22:04] Okay.

[00:22:04] It lists Gilgamesh as two thirds God and you know, just one third man.

[00:22:10] Okay.

[00:22:11] All right.

[00:22:11] Which explains how he was able to rule so long, but not why he couldn't get his online profile

[00:22:16] shit worked out.

[00:22:18] What?

[00:22:19] I'm just being silly.

[00:22:21] I'm just being silly.

[00:22:21] Oh my God.

[00:22:22] Okay.

[00:22:23] Come on.

[00:22:23] Come with me.

[00:22:24] It's a fun trip.

[00:22:25] No, I'm just, I'm trying to make sure that it makes sense to people that are listening.

[00:22:28] That's all.

[00:22:29] I'm just being silly.

[00:22:30] And not just like, you know, wife's inside jokes for the next 20 minutes.

[00:22:33] Whatever.

[00:22:34] Okay.

[00:22:34] So around the time Gilgamesh was probably strutting around Europe, Uric, not Europe, Uric.

[00:22:41] Here's the shit that was happening at that time.

[00:22:43] Okay.

[00:22:43] Egypt was over there building those pyramids.

[00:22:46] Okay.

[00:22:46] Yeah.

[00:22:47] People in China were domesticating silkworms, which meant they were making fancy fabrics

[00:22:52] and that was a thing.

[00:22:53] Okay.

[00:22:53] So that was happening.

[00:22:54] Okay.

[00:22:55] Meanwhile, in Europe, folks were like, what's a wheel?

[00:22:58] And chasing after wild boars.

[00:23:00] Womp womp.

[00:23:01] Like, yeah, that literally was what was happening over there.

[00:23:04] Got it.

[00:23:04] Yeah.

[00:23:05] So the epic of Gilgamesh paints him as this arrogant king who abuses his power, takes off the gods

[00:23:12] and then goes on an existential road trip to figure out the meaning of life.

[00:23:16] Okay.

[00:23:16] Yeah.

[00:23:17] So that's what his story is about.

[00:23:19] He ticked off the gods though.

[00:23:20] Yeah.

[00:23:20] That's what I said.

[00:23:21] Even though he's supposedly a god.

[00:23:23] Well, he's not a full god.

[00:23:26] And the gods get pissed off at each other all the fucking time.

[00:23:29] That's true.

[00:23:29] So, I mean, what does that matter?

[00:23:31] Right.

[00:23:32] So, okay.

[00:23:33] Spoiler.

[00:23:33] He does not find the meaning of life or purpose of living or what the fuck ever.

[00:23:38] But he does get a solid lesson in don't be a dick.

[00:23:41] Got it.

[00:23:42] Okay.

[00:23:43] Something that occurred to me, this wasn't just right now, but something I think would

[00:23:47] be a great video game, right?

[00:23:49] I think that somebody should make like a god combat simulator, like a god combat game,

[00:23:55] like mortal combat, but only with gods.

[00:23:57] And they have like the special god powers that they have.

[00:24:00] Oh my gosh.

[00:24:00] I think that would be amazing.

[00:24:01] And then just for shits and giggles, you could put Superman in there with his laser eyes.

[00:24:06] Right.

[00:24:07] Yeah.

[00:24:07] Just for fun.

[00:24:08] I guess.

[00:24:08] Why not?

[00:24:09] Right.

[00:24:09] They're all pretend.

[00:24:11] Yeah.

[00:24:11] That's true.

[00:24:12] You could put Cindy Lou, who made the Grinch's heart grow two sizes to that day, you know?

[00:24:17] Yeah.

[00:24:17] Yeah.

[00:24:18] Like everybody got a magic.

[00:24:19] I guess so.

[00:24:20] Yeah.

[00:24:21] Okay.

[00:24:21] So was Gilgamesh a real dude?

[00:24:24] Maybe.

[00:24:24] Maybe.

[00:24:25] Maybe.

[00:24:26] Okay.

[00:24:26] Did he live for 126 years and wrestle a giant bull sent by the gods?

[00:24:32] I doubt it.

[00:24:32] Probably not.

[00:24:33] Yeah.

[00:24:33] Probably not.

[00:24:34] But even so, his story still slaps and it's one of the oldest written epics we've got.

[00:24:40] Okay?

[00:24:41] You just...

[00:24:42] I did.

[00:24:43] I wrote that.

[00:24:44] You said that...

[00:24:46] That story still slaps.

[00:24:48] I said that.

[00:24:48] I'm sorry.

[00:24:49] I'm just...

[00:24:51] I'm okay, really.

[00:24:52] Okay.

[00:24:53] You can go on now.

[00:24:54] And then, did you hear me though?

[00:24:56] It's one of the oldest written epics we've got.

[00:24:59] Yes.

[00:24:59] And then I go, what?

[00:25:00] But Beowulf though.

[00:25:01] Sure.

[00:25:02] I was like, wait, what?

[00:25:02] Okay.

[00:25:03] So, okay.

[00:25:04] Here's me talking.

[00:25:05] I hear it.

[00:25:05] Okay.

[00:25:06] I always thought that honor goes to Beowulf, but nope.

[00:25:09] I was wrong.

[00:25:10] Beowulf is the baby in this comparison.

[00:25:13] Oh.

[00:25:13] It wasn't even born yet.

[00:25:14] It wasn't even a twinkle.

[00:25:15] Fuck a Beowulf.

[00:25:16] Yeah.

[00:25:17] Right?

[00:25:17] That's right.

[00:25:17] Yeah.

[00:25:18] The Epic of Gilgamesh is way older.

[00:25:21] Okay?

[00:25:21] Okay.

[00:25:22] It was written in Mesopotamia.

[00:25:24] The Epic of Gilgamesh...

[00:25:26] Gilgamesh.

[00:25:27] Gargamel.

[00:25:28] Dates back to around 2100 BC in its earliest versions as Sumerian poems.

[00:25:35] Okay.

[00:25:36] Yeah.

[00:25:36] The full version that we know of today, written in Akkadian...

[00:25:41] Oh, I was right then.

[00:25:42] It was the Sumerians.

[00:25:44] Sure.

[00:25:44] Because it was written later in Akkadian.

[00:25:46] Yeah.

[00:25:46] Yeah.

[00:25:46] Oh my gosh.

[00:25:47] That's so amazing.

[00:25:48] I remembered it in the right order and I doubted myself because I wasn't sure.

[00:25:52] Yeah.

[00:25:53] But yeah, I remembered it correctly.

[00:25:54] Good job.

[00:25:55] Okay.

[00:25:55] So the full version that we know of today, and I am saying that the word full is doing

[00:26:00] some heavy lifting there because it's not the full version.

[00:26:03] It's the full version that we have because there's pieces missing.

[00:26:07] Sure.

[00:26:07] Okay?

[00:26:08] Yeah.

[00:26:08] So that version was written in Akkadian, don't forget, and that one was pieced together

[00:26:15] around 1200 BCE.

[00:26:17] Okay.

[00:26:17] So that's more than 4,000 years ago ancient by any standard.

[00:26:21] Right.

[00:26:21] Yeah.

[00:26:22] So like the early, earliest one was 2100.

[00:26:25] Right.

[00:26:26] Yeah.

[00:26:26] And then the one that we have today was 1200.

[00:26:29] Wow.

[00:26:30] Okay.

[00:26:30] Yeah.

[00:26:30] And even both of those are older than Baby Wolf.

[00:26:33] Right.

[00:26:34] Did you hear what I called him?

[00:26:35] Yeah.

[00:26:36] Baby Wolf.

[00:26:36] Yeah.

[00:26:37] That's clever.

[00:26:37] Ye olde English epic of Baby Wolf comes from early medieval England and is thought to

[00:26:43] have been composed sometime between 700 to 1000.

[00:26:48] Current era.

[00:26:50] So new.

[00:26:50] I thought it was a BCE, bitch.

[00:26:53] It was just-

[00:26:54] It's current era.

[00:26:54] It's AD.

[00:26:56] It was just on the bestseller list last week.

[00:26:57] Like, reading-

[00:26:59] No, listen.

[00:26:59] Reading the Bible has like changed how I think about when things took place in history.

[00:27:06] Well, yeah.

[00:27:07] Of course.

[00:27:07] Because I never paid attention to things and I just knew what-

[00:27:11] Beowulf is old.

[00:27:12] It's one of those BCE things probably.

[00:27:14] Because I knew it was an oral history before it was ever written down and what we know

[00:27:17] today is Beowulf.

[00:27:19] It's just one version of the Beowulf story.

[00:27:22] But that was essentially being written in a lot of the times when all the-

[00:27:24] Prophets that we're learning about right now.

[00:27:26] They're a lot of the time in that-

[00:27:28] Oh, wait, no.

[00:27:29] You said 700-

[00:27:29] Current fucking era.

[00:27:31] Oh, shit.

[00:27:31] No, that is really new.

[00:27:32] Yeah.

[00:27:33] That's what I'm saying.

[00:27:34] Relatively speaking, it's very new.

[00:27:36] It literally was on the bestseller list because Seamus Heaney did a wonderful translation

[00:27:42] of it and I love that translation.

[00:27:46] And yeah, it is still on many bestseller lists because it's that good.

[00:27:51] That story slaps also.

[00:27:53] Right, right.

[00:27:53] Yeah.

[00:27:54] Okay.

[00:27:54] The manuscript that we have, that we know of, the one that Seamus gave us.

[00:28:00] Sure.

[00:28:01] It was written around 1000 CE.

[00:28:04] Got it.

[00:28:04] Current era.

[00:28:05] AD.

[00:28:06] I got it.

[00:28:07] I got it.

[00:28:07] I'm just making sure.

[00:28:08] So, you know, that's only about 1000 to 1300 years ago.

[00:28:12] Right.

[00:28:13] Okay.

[00:28:13] So, practically yesterday compared to Gilgamesh.

[00:28:16] So, Gilgamesh predates Beowulf by a good 3000 years.

[00:28:20] Wow.

[00:28:22] Like, my mind was blown.

[00:28:25] Yeah.

[00:28:25] I mean, if you could have heard the pop, it was like, pfft.

[00:28:30] Yeah.

[00:28:30] I believe it.

[00:28:31] I had no idea.

[00:28:33] Did you?

[00:28:34] I, no, I didn't.

[00:28:35] I thought it was a BC thing.

[00:28:36] You know what?

[00:28:36] I was never, I never really learned a lot about the ancient literature.

[00:28:40] Literature.

[00:28:41] Yeah.

[00:28:41] So, I don't know.

[00:28:42] See, I wasn't a history nerd.

[00:28:43] That much about it.

[00:28:44] I was a literature kind of nerd.

[00:28:46] Yeah.

[00:28:47] Nerd adjacent.

[00:28:47] But like, most of those discussions start, like you said, around Beowulf, right?

[00:28:51] Like, and yes, we all know about Gilgamesh, but like.

[00:28:55] I didn't.

[00:28:55] They.

[00:28:55] It's not.

[00:28:56] The time frames to me were not like.

[00:28:59] We spent.

[00:29:00] Something that I knew right off the top of my head.

[00:29:01] We spent a lot of time in literature classes discussing guilt, not Gilgamesh, Beowulf.

[00:29:07] Sure.

[00:29:07] And if we don't read the whole thing, we read excerpts of it and we're tested over it.

[00:29:12] And we're supposed to understand all of the history and, and the things and the stuff

[00:29:17] and the symbolism and, you know, just, I don't know.

[00:29:22] There's some, it's, it's great.

[00:29:24] But like, after we do all that, I'm like, but why not Gilgamesh?

[00:29:28] Right.

[00:29:28] Right.

[00:29:29] That doesn't make sense.

[00:29:30] But it's because usually when you're reading Beowulf, you're reading it in a British literature

[00:29:36] class.

[00:29:37] Yeah.

[00:29:38] Yeah.

[00:29:39] Beowulf is the earliest.

[00:29:41] Western culture versus, you know, ancient.

[00:29:43] The rest of the world.

[00:29:44] The Middle East culture.

[00:29:45] Right.

[00:29:45] Or the Near East.

[00:29:47] Right.

[00:29:47] Or Eastern culture.

[00:29:48] Yeah.

[00:29:48] So, I mean, yeah, England wasn't even a thing yet, but Beowulf is the earliest British

[00:29:56] literature, whatever you want to call it at that time.

[00:29:58] Yeah.

[00:29:58] The Anglo-Saxons or what the fuck ever.

[00:30:00] Sure.

[00:30:01] Yeah.

[00:30:01] I don't know.

[00:30:02] I don't know history.

[00:30:03] Okay.

[00:30:03] I'm just being right in front there.

[00:30:05] I don't know shit about shit.

[00:30:06] All right.

[00:30:07] So let's talk about the epic.

[00:30:08] Okay.

[00:30:09] Here's the epic of Gargamel in a nutsack.

[00:30:12] Ready?

[00:30:13] Not in a nutshell.

[00:30:14] Okay.

[00:30:14] Not in a nutshell.

[00:30:16] In a nutsack.

[00:30:17] Because it's Gargamel.

[00:30:18] Of course.

[00:30:19] Okay.

[00:30:19] Gilgamesh, the jerk king.

[00:30:21] Ready?

[00:30:22] Yeah.

[00:30:22] Gilgamesh is the king of Yurik and he is just too fucking much.

[00:30:26] Okay.

[00:30:27] Okay.

[00:30:28] He's strong and he's arrogant and he abuses his power doing whatever the fuck he wants.

[00:30:32] He's just walking around fucking with people.

[00:30:34] Yeah.

[00:30:34] Okay.

[00:30:35] Including taking off his own people.

[00:30:37] So his own people are like, um, excuse me, sky daddies.

[00:30:40] Can y'all maybe do something about this douchebag?

[00:30:43] Uh huh.

[00:30:43] And they like are praying and praying and praying to the gods.

[00:30:46] Yeah.

[00:30:47] Okay.

[00:30:48] Then enters Enkidu.

[00:30:50] Okay.

[00:30:50] Okay.

[00:30:51] So the gods are like, yeah, we probably should do something about this son of a bitch.

[00:30:54] Got it.

[00:30:54] So the gods create Enkidu, a wild hairy man, hairy man, a very, very, very, very scary man.

[00:31:03] Okay.

[00:31:03] When I was in fifth grade, Mr. Walker, um, he taught both mathematics and history.

[00:31:10] Um, my class only had him for math, not history, but he was teaching this song to the other class.

[00:31:16] And so we would hear all the kids singing scary man, hairy man.

[00:31:22] And we wanted to learn it too.

[00:31:24] So he taught it to us.

[00:31:25] And all these years later, I don't know anything about it except for what I literally just saying.

[00:31:30] Those are all the words I know.

[00:31:32] Okay.

[00:31:32] Okay.

[00:31:33] Thank you, Mr. Walker.

[00:31:34] Okay.

[00:31:34] Okay.

[00:31:34] Yeah.

[00:31:35] So the gods created Enkidu, a wild hairy man who's basically Gargamel's equal in strength.

[00:31:42] Okay.

[00:31:42] They are, they're like the same.

[00:31:44] They're like, buddy.

[00:31:46] After a bit of drama, including a wrestling match, they become besties.

[00:31:50] Okay.

[00:31:50] Cause they're the same.

[00:31:51] Now I found the bit about the wrestling match interesting.

[00:31:55] Yeah.

[00:31:55] Right.

[00:31:56] Because the.

[00:31:56] Hi, Jacob.

[00:31:58] In the desert.

[00:31:59] In the desert.

[00:31:59] In the desert wrestling with God.

[00:32:00] Yeah.

[00:32:01] Yeah.

[00:32:01] Interesting.

[00:32:02] I didn't get a really good breakdown of that part.

[00:32:04] I meant to, but I ran out of time.

[00:32:06] Right.

[00:32:06] And they might not have anything to do with each other.

[00:32:09] No, but just that it's like, you know, they had a wrestling match and then they became

[00:32:12] besties.

[00:32:12] Oh.

[00:32:13] Okay.

[00:32:13] It's definitely an interesting.

[00:32:14] Right?

[00:32:15] Because the, it could have at least sprung the idea of that.

[00:32:19] Sure.

[00:32:19] That thing that happened in the Bible.

[00:32:21] Because that thing in the Bible was so random and weird.

[00:32:24] Right?

[00:32:24] Right.

[00:32:25] Like this actually makes sense because it's part of the story.

[00:32:29] They're like, yeah, we need to make somebody strong who can beat Gilgamesh.

[00:32:34] And so Gilgamesh goes out to fight this guy who is his equal and they are fighting literally

[00:32:40] because everybody's pissed off at Gilgamesh because he's a dick.

[00:32:42] Maybe somebody that was holding one of the original, you know, like things for the Bible.

[00:32:47] The clay tablet.

[00:32:48] Stuffed the bit with Gilgamesh in there by accident.

[00:32:51] They put it in the wrong envelope.

[00:32:53] And we just ended up with a wrestling match in the Bible.

[00:32:55] Right?

[00:32:55] They stapled the wrong page.

[00:32:56] Right.

[00:32:56] They were always doing shit like that.

[00:32:57] Could have happened.

[00:32:58] Okay.

[00:32:58] So they're besties now, right?

[00:33:00] Yeah.

[00:33:00] And Kidu and Gilgamesh.

[00:33:03] Gilgamesh.

[00:33:04] I stuttered.

[00:33:05] I could not get the word out.

[00:33:06] I apologize.

[00:33:06] Yeah.

[00:33:07] I do that every once in a while.

[00:33:09] Gargamel.

[00:33:09] Think of it as the OG bromance.

[00:33:12] Okay?

[00:33:13] Okay.

[00:33:13] Okay.

[00:33:14] They buds.

[00:33:15] Okay.

[00:33:15] They go on adventures galore.

[00:33:17] Okay?

[00:33:18] Yeah.

[00:33:19] I summed this up because, you know, there's too much.

[00:33:21] Okay?

[00:33:22] The dynamic duo, Batman and Robin, they head off to fight monsters and they make a name for

[00:33:28] themselves.

[00:33:28] Yay!

[00:33:29] They're so cool, right?

[00:33:31] First, they take down this guy named Humbaba.

[00:33:34] And he's the terrifying guardian of the cedar forest.

[00:33:38] If I have time, I'll get to that later.

[00:33:40] The cedar forest might have been like the trees of Lebanon.

[00:33:44] Sure.

[00:33:45] You know what I mean?

[00:33:45] Yeah.

[00:33:46] Like that's what many scholars think.

[00:33:47] Interesting.

[00:33:48] Yeah.

[00:33:49] Okay.

[00:33:49] Yeah.

[00:33:50] So this terrifying giant, he was a giant, he was an ogre, like whatever.

[00:33:56] Yeah.

[00:33:57] I'm going to get a little bit more to him in a minute.

[00:33:59] Well, if they were headed, so they would have been heading that way, that would have been

[00:34:02] heading west.

[00:34:04] And they would have been fighting, coming up against maybe the Canaanites or the Babylonians

[00:34:08] or the Egyptians.

[00:34:09] I don't know who was all around exactly during those times.

[00:34:11] Tall people.

[00:34:12] Yeah.

[00:34:13] All the tall people.

[00:34:14] They even referred to at one point in the Bible that the Egyptians were giants.

[00:34:17] Yeah.

[00:34:17] So like it could have, I mean, there's any number of things that could have been.

[00:34:20] Right.

[00:34:20] But not everybody agrees with that take.

[00:34:22] Sure.

[00:34:23] Even though it says it's the fucking cedar forest.

[00:34:26] Right.

[00:34:26] Right.

[00:34:27] Right.

[00:34:27] Which, what is the city known for cedar all throughout the goddamn Bible?

[00:34:31] Right.

[00:34:31] So I don't know.

[00:34:32] I'm guessing it's Lebanon.

[00:34:33] I'm not a historian, but if I have to pick one, that's what I'm picking.

[00:34:36] Sure.

[00:34:37] But some people think it's this other city and I forget which one because who cares.

[00:34:41] That's east, like the exact opposite direction.

[00:34:44] Okay.

[00:34:44] And even at that, I don't have any idea who they were actually fighting.

[00:34:48] No, but I feel comfortable picking sides on this one.

[00:34:51] Do you?

[00:34:51] I do.

[00:34:52] Okay.

[00:34:53] Um, it's kind of like if you take me to a football game and I don't know anything about

[00:34:57] either of the teams, I'm going to ask you just for some basic stats because I have to

[00:35:02] cheer for a team.

[00:35:02] I can't just sit there and just watch.

[00:35:04] I don't care enough about football to only watch it for the sport and the art of it.

[00:35:10] Okay.

[00:35:10] I recognize that there are smarts and good plays and stuff.

[00:35:13] So I'm like, no, I need to pick a team.

[00:35:16] I got to cheer.

[00:35:17] Right.

[00:35:17] Right.

[00:35:17] And I got to go, ah, when you know, they get sacked.

[00:35:21] Yeah.

[00:35:21] Right.

[00:35:21] So I'm going to ask you for some basic stats and you're going to give me some basic stats

[00:35:26] or I'm going to look them up on my phone now that we have cell phones and you know,

[00:35:29] I don't go to football games, but this is pretend world.

[00:35:32] And then I'm going to pick a side and you're going to ask me, why are you choosing that team?

[00:35:37] And I'm going to say, well, the quarterback is cuter and also this, this and this.

[00:35:44] Like cuteness won't be my only one.

[00:35:46] Right.

[00:35:47] It might also be that I like their cheerleaders.

[00:35:49] Okay.

[00:35:50] Cause that sometimes factors in.

[00:35:51] Sure.

[00:35:52] But also the stats, like if they're on a losing streak, I'm not picking them.

[00:35:56] Duh.

[00:35:57] Okay.

[00:35:58] Also if they're kicker, um, what, what do you call that guy that comes on the field and

[00:36:03] his only fucking job is to kick it through the goalpost.

[00:36:08] He's the kicker, right?

[00:36:09] Yeah.

[00:36:09] Okay.

[00:36:09] I can't stand when they miss on either team.

[00:36:13] I'm like, you have one goddamn job.

[00:36:15] Have you ever tried to kick a field goal?

[00:36:17] I know because that's not my goddamn job.

[00:36:19] That's his goddamn job.

[00:36:21] It's not easy.

[00:36:21] He is paid millions of dollars to trot his tight little ass out there, do a little ballerina

[00:36:27] dance and then go pink.

[00:36:29] Yeah.

[00:36:30] And that's it.

[00:36:30] That's his whole fucking job.

[00:36:32] And he misses.

[00:36:34] Get the fuck out of here.

[00:36:35] You piece of shit.

[00:36:38] I'm just saying, but I feel the same way.

[00:36:41] Like when I found out.

[00:36:41] I apologize to any field goal kickers in our, I feel the same way about baseball hitters.

[00:36:47] When I found out baseball stats, I'm like, you think that is a good number.

[00:36:51] You miss more than you hit.

[00:36:53] That's stupid.

[00:36:54] You think you're good at that sport?

[00:36:56] You're paid.

[00:36:57] Okay.

[00:36:58] Probably not millions because football gets millions.

[00:37:01] But generally speaking, I'm going to guess baseball is not as popular as football.

[00:37:05] We don't really have a Super Bowl that even non-football people stop what they're doing

[00:37:12] and watch the commercials.

[00:37:13] You'd be surprised.

[00:37:13] There's, I think, a lot of better played players in baseball because of the way they

[00:37:17] pay the players.

[00:37:18] All right.

[00:37:19] Then there is in football.

[00:37:20] I'll take your word on it.

[00:37:20] I could be wrong about that.

[00:37:21] I don't know shit about it.

[00:37:21] I'm pretty sure that's correct.

[00:37:22] Well, I was going to say you're paid thousands, but you're paid either thousands or millions.

[00:37:27] You can't hit for shit.

[00:37:29] I'm just saying.

[00:37:31] And yes, my understanding of these sports is amateurish and childish.

[00:37:37] And I am fine with that because I know how to keep a calendar better than most people.

[00:37:43] So fuck off.

[00:37:45] Sure.

[00:37:45] Okay.

[00:37:46] So, okay.

[00:37:46] These besties, they're like...

[00:37:48] For the record, I love baseball.

[00:37:50] I know.

[00:37:50] You love baseball and football and tennis.

[00:37:52] But baseball specifically, I know it was one of my favorite sports that I played when

[00:37:57] I was growing up.

[00:37:58] You are just a very sporty guy.

[00:38:00] And it's honestly amazing.

[00:38:01] I don't understand how we're together.

[00:38:04] Because I am not that girl.

[00:38:06] But, I mean, I was a cheerleader for one semester.

[00:38:10] You were.

[00:38:11] Yeah.

[00:38:12] In high school.

[00:38:12] And you ran track.

[00:38:13] And I did run track every year.

[00:38:15] Yeah.

[00:38:15] A varsity track.

[00:38:17] Yeah.

[00:38:17] And it wasn't bad.

[00:38:19] I could sprint a little bit.

[00:38:20] Yeah.

[00:38:20] Yeah.

[00:38:21] Uh huh.

[00:38:21] Then I hit the states and realized that, oh, it's like if you take a 10 in Ohio, she

[00:38:28] is not a 10 in California.

[00:38:31] You know what I'm saying?

[00:38:33] Yeah.

[00:38:34] You get me.

[00:38:34] Okay?

[00:38:35] Yeah.

[00:38:35] She's an Ohio 10, but she's in California.

[00:38:38] What is she?

[00:38:39] Right.

[00:38:40] Yeah.

[00:38:40] Six at best, right?

[00:38:42] Maybe.

[00:38:43] Okay.

[00:38:43] I'm being very like body judgy, but you know, it's a thing that people can understand

[00:38:49] what I'm saying.

[00:38:50] All right.

[00:38:50] Whatever.

[00:38:50] Okay.

[00:38:52] So the dynamic duo, Batman and Robin, they head off to fight monsters and make a name

[00:38:56] for themselves.

[00:38:57] Yay.

[00:38:57] They take down that giant guy that we talked about in Baba.

[00:39:00] Yeah.

[00:39:00] In the cedar forest.

[00:39:03] That's probably in Lebanon, but who the fuck knows?

[00:39:05] Right.

[00:39:06] Then they kill the fucking bull of heaven.

[00:39:08] The bull of, you know, the bull of heaven.

[00:39:10] Yeah.

[00:39:10] Okay.

[00:39:11] Now the bull of heaven was sent by the goddess Ishtar or Inanna or whatever the fuck her

[00:39:16] name is today.

[00:39:17] Okay.

[00:39:17] After Gilgamesh rejects her, she was trying to sit on his dick and he was like, absolutely

[00:39:22] not.

[00:39:23] He was like slut shaming her.

[00:39:27] Literally.

[00:39:27] He's like, I know how many guys you've been with.

[00:39:31] I, you have slept with so many gods.

[00:39:33] Uh huh.

[00:39:33] Get the fuck off my jock.

[00:39:35] Like literally he was so rude to her.

[00:39:37] I saw somebody in our discord talking that, that he might've been gay.

[00:39:41] Uh, that could have been a thing too.

[00:39:43] I was saying maybe, and maybe I'm, you know, that I don't want to say that with like authority,

[00:39:47] but like.

[00:39:48] Well, he hurt her feelings.

[00:39:49] You know, she was not expecting like maybe a polite, Oh no, thanks would have been okay.

[00:39:54] I don't know.

[00:39:55] I've never turned down a goddess before.

[00:39:57] Right.

[00:39:57] Right.

[00:39:58] But he didn't do that.

[00:40:00] He didn't give her a polite.

[00:40:01] No, thanks.

[00:40:01] He was like, bitch, you are a whore.

[00:40:04] You're a slut.

[00:40:04] Get off me.

[00:40:05] Go away.

[00:40:06] Like he was just calling her all kinds of names and just like, he messed her up.

[00:40:10] So she sent the bull of heaven after them.

[00:40:12] Sure.

[00:40:12] It was like, I'll show you.

[00:40:13] I won't kill you myself, but I will make my bull kill you.

[00:40:16] Right.

[00:40:17] Right.

[00:40:17] Which is interesting.

[00:40:17] Cause you know, the Minotaur is one of those Greek stories and the Minotaur is nothing

[00:40:22] but a bull, you know?

[00:40:24] Right.

[00:40:24] Yeah.

[00:40:25] So I'm just saying all these stories have like overlap.

[00:40:27] Sure.

[00:40:28] Okay.

[00:40:28] Anyway, he gets ghoul stars gay or straight for keeping his dick to himself though.

[00:40:33] Right.

[00:40:33] But I mean, but he was a dick.

[00:40:36] He was, I mean, there's no reason to, you know, make her feel bad for sleeping with.

[00:40:40] She's sex positive.

[00:40:42] That's fine.

[00:40:43] If a guy sleeps around, nobody gives two shits.

[00:40:45] Moreover, it's probably because, you know, look, if he didn't, if he wasn't okay with

[00:40:50] who he was, he might've been doing that to, you know, just make himself feel better about

[00:40:55] himself.

[00:40:56] Right.

[00:40:57] You know, like that's oftentimes what's the, the reasoning behind those types of insults

[00:41:02] is so that that person can feel more empowered.

[00:41:06] Morally superior.

[00:41:06] Yeah.

[00:41:07] Yeah.

[00:41:07] Cause if you can put somebody else down lower than you, then you get to like, feel like

[00:41:12] you're higher that day.

[00:41:13] Yeah.

[00:41:14] Instead of just getting to know yourself and be like, you know what?

[00:41:17] It is okay to be a slut and it's okay to be gay and it's okay to be a gay slut.

[00:41:22] And you know, just, it's okay to not be either of those things.

[00:41:26] It's okay to just be, just be, just don't hurt people.

[00:41:29] Right.

[00:41:29] Right.

[00:41:30] Consent informed consent always.

[00:41:33] Okay.

[00:41:34] All right.

[00:41:34] So, um, they have this bull coming after them now.

[00:41:38] They're like, Oh fuck me.

[00:41:40] Right.

[00:41:40] So tragedy strikes.

[00:41:42] Cause you know, it's tar sent this bull after them.

[00:41:45] Okay.

[00:41:45] Okay.

[00:41:46] The gods are not happy about the bull thing because, um, cause it was the bowl of heaven.

[00:41:52] Yeah.

[00:41:52] I mean, so, um, they're like, Oh, they killed the bull.

[00:41:57] I missed that part.

[00:41:58] Sorry.

[00:41:59] They being the boys are boys Gilgamesh and then the other man and Robin.

[00:42:03] Right.

[00:42:03] Yeah.

[00:42:04] The dynamic duo.

[00:42:05] Got it.

[00:42:05] The besties, the bromance.

[00:42:07] Yeah.

[00:42:07] Okay.

[00:42:07] Yeah.

[00:42:08] She's like, well, fuck you.

[00:42:10] I'll send a bull after you.

[00:42:11] I'm sending the bull of heaven.

[00:42:12] And they're like, well, fuck you.

[00:42:13] We killed it.

[00:42:14] Now what?

[00:42:15] Okay.

[00:42:15] Check me out.

[00:42:17] Catch me outside, bitch.

[00:42:18] And then, so the gods were like, I'm sorry, you did what?

[00:42:22] And so they punished the pair by killing Enkidu.

[00:42:25] You know, the guy they had made to fight Gilgamesh.

[00:42:30] They're like, because they're like, you're not working out.

[00:42:32] You did not defeat Gilgamesh.

[00:42:34] Oh, they became friends.

[00:42:35] That was the guy that was his buddy.

[00:42:37] Yeah.

[00:42:38] The guys made this.

[00:42:39] The gods made this guy.

[00:42:41] Okay.

[00:42:42] And they're like, okay, now go take care of Gilgamesh.

[00:42:44] He's getting, he's too much of a dick.

[00:42:46] And our people are praying to us.

[00:42:47] Right.

[00:42:48] And so Enkidu, the guy that the gods made, he goes down and he's like, let's fight, bitch.

[00:42:53] And then Gilgamesh.

[00:42:56] Gilgamesh.

[00:42:57] Thank you.

[00:42:58] He's like, yeah, let's go.

[00:43:00] But then they're like, this is fun.

[00:43:03] You want beer?

[00:43:04] And so then they become besties.

[00:43:05] And so the guy that they created, they then killed.

[00:43:11] Right.

[00:43:11] I got it.

[00:43:11] I'm just like, what?

[00:43:13] Yeah.

[00:43:14] They're like, you're not working out.

[00:43:15] You're a problem.

[00:43:16] Sure.

[00:43:16] Got to go.

[00:43:16] Right.

[00:43:17] So they kill Enkidu and Gilgamesh, he's absolutely fucking wrecked because that was his bestie

[00:43:23] or his boyfriend or boys.

[00:43:25] Yeah.

[00:43:25] Right.

[00:43:25] Now that I think about it, like I'm so slow.

[00:43:28] I'm very literal.

[00:43:29] I just took it as base value.

[00:43:31] Sure.

[00:43:31] No, they were lovers.

[00:43:32] Oh my God.

[00:43:33] Possibly.

[00:43:34] No, I love that idea.

[00:43:36] Right.

[00:43:36] But we're trying to be fair here and say that, you know, it doesn't specifically state that.

[00:43:41] So no, it doesn't.

[00:43:43] But it's my head cannon now.

[00:43:44] Right.

[00:43:45] I'm sure there are a lot of indicators.

[00:43:47] Oh, I love it.

[00:43:48] I need to learn more about this theory.

[00:43:50] Oh, I hope they're gay because maybe not because then then his lover died.

[00:43:56] And that's tragic.

[00:43:57] Oh God, I don't know what to feel here.

[00:43:59] All right.

[00:44:00] Anyway, it was like 4000 years ago.

[00:44:01] So I know Gilgamesh is he's really tore up from the floor up.

[00:44:05] Yeah.

[00:44:05] He can't do it.

[00:44:06] Right.

[00:44:06] He's spiraling into a full blown existential crisis about death and mortality.

[00:44:11] He's like, wait, people can die.

[00:44:13] The gods made this guy.

[00:44:14] Wait, I'm two thirds.

[00:44:16] God, if he can die, can I die?

[00:44:17] Oh, fuck.

[00:44:18] Yeah.

[00:44:19] So he's like he's mourning his bestie or his lover or both.

[00:44:23] And he's like, everybody's mad at me.

[00:44:26] I can't.

[00:44:27] This is just too many things.

[00:44:29] And so he goes on this quest for immortality.

[00:44:32] Okay.

[00:44:33] He's like, fuck it.

[00:44:34] Yeah.

[00:44:34] He decides I'm going to live forever.

[00:44:36] How about that?

[00:44:36] Okay.

[00:44:37] He sets out to find this guy.

[00:44:40] Okay.

[00:44:42] Okay.

[00:44:42] We're going to get to him in a minute because this source that I was getting this from,

[00:44:46] they're like, you know, the guy who survived the God's flood.

[00:44:49] And I'm like, no, because I haven't read that yet.

[00:44:51] What the fuck are you talking about?

[00:44:52] So we're going to talk about that in a minute.

[00:44:54] Okay.

[00:44:54] Okay.

[00:44:55] All right.

[00:44:55] So a knapish Tim, he had survived some flood.

[00:45:01] Okay.

[00:45:02] All right.

[00:45:03] And a gnashed Tim.

[00:45:05] He got immortality as a reward for surviving.

[00:45:08] Got it.

[00:45:09] Like he made it.

[00:45:09] Yay.

[00:45:10] Maybe he was the giant that was like living on the side of the arc.

[00:45:14] No, just kidding.

[00:45:14] He wasn't.

[00:45:15] Anyway, after a really long journey, including battling fucking scorpions.

[00:45:20] Damn.

[00:45:21] And crossing the boom, boom, boom waters of death.

[00:45:25] Waters of death.

[00:45:26] Yeah.

[00:45:26] Like waters of death, like capital waters, capital death.

[00:45:30] Like, was it like the river sticks?

[00:45:32] I wonder.

[00:45:33] I don't know.

[00:45:34] Like I didn't have time.

[00:45:35] There was so much.

[00:45:36] There was so much.

[00:45:37] I didn't have time.

[00:45:38] Right.

[00:45:39] Right.

[00:45:39] I want to know though.

[00:45:41] Yeah.

[00:45:41] You know, we may have to come back to Kevin.

[00:45:43] No, I'm sure there's a lot here.

[00:45:44] You know, I called him Kevin.

[00:45:45] Yeah.

[00:45:46] I was like, what did you just say?

[00:45:47] Because it's time.

[00:45:48] We need to talk about Kevin.

[00:45:50] And I said, we need to talk about.

[00:45:51] You've never heard.

[00:45:52] We need to talk about Kevin.

[00:45:54] And what are you talking about?

[00:45:56] Okay.

[00:45:57] I'm going to carry on somebody in the live chat.

[00:46:01] No, you write down.

[00:46:02] Yeah.

[00:46:03] And then you will read the answer when it pops up in our live chat.

[00:46:06] People should come to our live discourse on Wednesdays at 10 PM to get this kind of information.

[00:46:12] But husband is going to read and somebody's got the answer.

[00:46:16] Okay.

[00:46:16] Anyway, I'm going to carry on while you wait for somebody to give you that information.

[00:46:21] All right.

[00:46:22] Yeah.

[00:46:22] We need to talk about Kevin.

[00:46:23] What is that from?

[00:46:24] Yeah.

[00:46:24] Yeah.

[00:46:25] Anyway, we are talking about Gilgamesh.

[00:46:27] Okay.

[00:46:28] So he crosses the waters of death and he meets a napish Tim.

[00:46:33] Okay.

[00:46:34] Okay.

[00:46:34] The guy who survived.

[00:46:36] And is nobody answering you?

[00:46:37] Nope.

[00:46:38] Oh, that's sad.

[00:46:39] Okay.

[00:46:39] Give me a minute and then I will get to that because we're almost at the end of Gilgamesh's

[00:46:43] epic.

[00:46:44] Okay.

[00:46:44] Okay.

[00:46:44] So, um, of Nepesh Tim, the guy who survived the flood, he tells Gilgamesh, Oh, sorry, my

[00:46:51] dude, immortality is not for you.

[00:46:54] I know you fought a lot of things.

[00:46:55] You came all this way, but, um, I do have like, uh, you know, second place prize instead.

[00:47:01] Um, here's a plant that'll make you young again.

[00:47:03] So he gives them like some algae mask or something.

[00:47:06] I don't know.

[00:47:07] Or he gives them like a map.

[00:47:09] He has to like tie rocks to his boots so that he stays under the water so that he can

[00:47:14] like go down and get this magic plant.

[00:47:16] Okay.

[00:47:17] But then on his way home, a fucking snake steals the plant.

[00:47:21] Oh, damn.

[00:47:22] You know, them snakes.

[00:47:23] It's always stealing those plants from you.

[00:47:25] Yeah.

[00:47:25] And then it, as soon as it stole the plant from him, like, what is, what does he say

[00:47:30] that this thing do?

[00:47:31] It makes you young again.

[00:47:32] So the second the snake steals the rock, he sheds his skin cause he's young again.

[00:47:36] Oh, and that's why snakes shed their skin.

[00:47:38] He's done.

[00:47:40] He ran off with it.

[00:47:41] Got it.

[00:47:41] I guess snakes don't run.

[00:47:42] He shimmied off with it.

[00:47:44] Right.

[00:47:44] Okay.

[00:47:44] And Gilgamesh learns that he can't cheat death.

[00:47:47] Okay.

[00:47:48] Okay.

[00:47:48] So then he returns to Europe, his beautiful little city and he's humbled and he's wiser

[00:47:53] cause he might die someday.

[00:47:55] Sure.

[00:47:55] He lost his bestie or his lover and he learned that, oh, I ain't shit, man.

[00:48:00] The gods, like my life is in their hands and they, they created somebody to beat

[00:48:05] me and then they killed him out from under me.

[00:48:08] And so he's like, yeah, I am a little humbled and I'm a little wiser.

[00:48:12] Right.

[00:48:13] Um, he realizes at that point that his legacy is actually his great city, not his living

[00:48:21] forever.

[00:48:21] And that the stories people will tell about them are how he will actually live on.

[00:48:29] So it's a tale of friendship, grief, and the search for meaning of 4,000 year old reminder

[00:48:35] that even Kings have to face their humanity.

[00:48:38] Okay.

[00:48:39] Okay.

[00:48:39] Yeah.

[00:48:39] And then, um, I had to quote the end of, um, the wizard of Oz.

[00:48:45] Me.

[00:48:46] What have you learned Gargamel?

[00:48:48] I'm, I'm Glenda me.

[00:48:49] Okay.

[00:48:49] What have you learned?

[00:48:50] Gilgamesh.

[00:48:51] Gilgamesh.

[00:48:52] Gargamel.

[00:48:52] I was just making sure.

[00:48:53] And then, so Gargamel answers.

[00:48:55] Well, I think that it wasn't enough just to want to see uncle Henry and aunt M or

[00:49:00] Enkidu or sky daddy.

[00:49:02] And it's that if I ever go looking for my heart's desire or immortality ever again, I

[00:49:08] won't look any further than my own backyard behind my palace in Europe, because if it isn't

[00:49:13] there, I never really lost it to begin with.

[00:49:15] Is that right?

[00:49:17] Now me, um, Glenda says, that's all it is.

[00:49:20] Hmm.

[00:49:21] Yeah.

[00:49:22] Okay.

[00:49:22] So literally that's what the wizard of Oz ending was.

[00:49:25] It was the Gilgamesh ending.

[00:49:27] Got it.

[00:49:28] Okay.

[00:49:28] But that juicy flood story though, which I will answer for you in just a second, because

[00:49:33] Oh my God, you're like, what is we need to talk about Kevin?

[00:49:36] Yeah.

[00:49:37] Okay.

[00:49:37] It was a movie that I don't know if it was maybe based on a book.

[00:49:41] Um, but anyway, very recently, like within the last 10 years.

[00:49:45] So like not an old thing that I'm talking about here.

[00:49:47] It was literally called.

[00:49:48] We need to talk about Kevin.

[00:49:49] And it was, uh, Tilda Swinton was in it.

[00:49:52] It was very well known.

[00:49:53] Uh, her son was a Columbine kind of school shooter kid.

[00:49:59] Right.

[00:49:59] And there were warnings, there were signs and, um, he kills the kids and then ends up dead

[00:50:06] himself.

[00:50:06] And it's about her coming to terms with, you know, how do I grieve for my son that's lost?

[00:50:12] And how do I apologize to these other parents?

[00:50:17] And how do I deal with my own rage and frustration and my feelings of inadequacy as a parent that

[00:50:22] clearly I must've done something wrong.

[00:50:25] So it's a thing called like when school shootings, like really came on the news, like now we're

[00:50:31] like sick and tired of them cause they're just every day or whatever.

[00:50:33] Right.

[00:50:34] But when it first started kind of like the me too movement was like, suddenly it just

[00:50:38] was there.

[00:50:39] Right.

[00:50:40] So like when school shootings were like, dude, these are a lot.

[00:50:43] We need to talk about Kevin came out and it was very controversial.

[00:50:48] Like I'm just really surprised you never heard of it.

[00:50:50] So when I said we need to talk about Gilgamesh, that's kind of what I was referencing.

[00:50:54] Got it.

[00:50:55] Okay.

[00:50:55] Are you good?

[00:50:56] I'm good.

[00:50:57] I was, I mean, I, I want to make sure our listeners knew what you were talking about

[00:51:00] too.

[00:51:01] So that's fine.

[00:51:02] I just, I'm surprised you didn't know it.

[00:51:04] Yeah.

[00:51:05] You don't know social things, but I don't know social things either.

[00:51:09] We just don't know different social things.

[00:51:11] I don't know people social.

[00:51:13] You don't know entertainment social.

[00:51:15] Right.

[00:51:15] All right.

[00:51:16] But that juicy flood story though.

[00:51:18] Yeah.

[00:51:18] Okay.

[00:51:19] The gods plans to destroy humanity with a massive flood.

[00:51:23] Okay.

[00:51:23] That sounds familiar.

[00:51:24] Yeah.

[00:51:25] So, okay.

[00:51:25] Um, this story at Nippishtim.

[00:51:29] Sure.

[00:51:29] I don't know his name.

[00:51:30] Okay.

[00:51:32] Nippishtim.

[00:51:32] He's the one that survived the flood.

[00:51:34] And he's the one that, um, Gargamel went to him was like, I want to live forever.

[00:51:39] And Nippishtim was like, nah, but here's, um, a map to magic moss or whatever.

[00:51:47] Sure.

[00:51:47] That'll make you younger.

[00:51:49] Yeah.

[00:51:49] He, he also was like, and I have a story for you.

[00:51:52] So the story that I am about to tell you is the story that in Nippishtim was telling Gargamel.

[00:52:00] Okay.

[00:52:00] Yeah.

[00:52:00] The gods plan to destroy humanity with a massive flood, but crafty Aya, she's a goddess, could

[00:52:07] not keep the secret.

[00:52:08] She was always flapping them gums.

[00:52:10] Okay.

[00:52:11] Or he, whatever.

[00:52:12] I thought it was a girl cause Aya, but it's a boy.

[00:52:15] Got it.

[00:52:15] I apologize.

[00:52:16] I misgendered the god.

[00:52:17] He whispered the plan through a reed wall to Abnashabtum.

[00:52:21] Okay.

[00:52:22] Uh huh.

[00:52:22] Telling him, you need to build a boat.

[00:52:25] If you build it, they will come.

[00:52:29] So, okay.

[00:52:30] So he builds a boat to save himself, his family and all living creatures, all of his brides

[00:52:36] and his servant women and his slave women, all of them.

[00:52:41] Interesting.

[00:52:41] And he follows orders and he loads the boat up with everything and everyone he could.

[00:52:45] Okay.

[00:52:46] And gold.

[00:52:47] Did I mention that?

[00:52:48] Oh, gold too, huh?

[00:52:49] There's going to be no humans.

[00:52:50] I don't know why the fuck he's taking his treasures, but he took his treasures too.

[00:52:53] Yeah.

[00:52:53] Okay.

[00:52:54] He didn't take the animals like Noah did.

[00:52:56] He just took stuff.

[00:52:57] I thought it said all living creatures.

[00:52:58] Well, it does, but then...

[00:53:01] It's not...

[00:53:03] It's not...

[00:53:05] Like with Noah, the story was very clear.

[00:53:08] With Gilgamesh, the story is less clear.

[00:53:11] Okay.

[00:53:11] So it's like, just kind of a throw away, like, yeah, bring the critters too.

[00:53:15] Okay.

[00:53:16] Okay.

[00:53:17] And he sealed it tight just before the storm hit.

[00:53:19] Okay.

[00:53:20] So the flood unleashed chaos.

[00:53:23] Winds raged, the land shattered, and people were swept away like debris.

[00:53:29] Even the gods panicked.

[00:53:31] Mm-hmm.

[00:53:31] They made the fucking storm.

[00:53:33] And they're like, oh, what have we done?

[00:53:35] Right, right.

[00:53:35] Yeah.

[00:53:36] They were cowering in heaven, not like this, and weeping over the destruction.

[00:53:41] Oh, I can't believe we made this hurricane that is now killing us.

[00:53:44] Oh!

[00:53:46] Ishtar, guilt ridden, wailed that she'd gone too far.

[00:53:51] Mm-hmm.

[00:53:51] Indeed she had.

[00:53:53] Did she promise over a rainbow that she's never going to do it again?

[00:53:56] No, she did not.

[00:53:57] Oh, okay.

[00:53:57] Nope.

[00:53:57] I just was curious.

[00:53:58] That would have been interesting.

[00:53:59] I know this is a similar story that, you know, discuss some similar things.

[00:54:03] Right.

[00:54:03] Yeah, we'll get to that.

[00:54:04] Yeah.

[00:54:04] Okay.

[00:54:04] So after six days and nights of apocalyptic storms, total tempest in a teapot, okay?

[00:54:10] Not a teapot.

[00:54:11] That's a different phrase.

[00:54:12] That phrase does not apply here because it was like the quote unquote world.

[00:54:15] So it was a little tempest in a tempesty place.

[00:54:19] Have you never heard the phrase tempest in a teapot?

[00:54:22] I don't know, no.

[00:54:23] I haven't.

[00:54:23] It's like a bull in a china shop.

[00:54:26] Okay.

[00:54:26] It's a big, clunky, huge, klutzy thing.

[00:54:32] Got it.

[00:54:32] In a small place where it has to like tiptoe.

[00:54:35] Got it.

[00:54:35] Okay.

[00:54:36] Tempest teapot.

[00:54:37] No, I get it.

[00:54:39] Actually, in Fantastic Beasts, that's part of what makes the teapot scene so funny when

[00:54:47] he's trying to catch that critter and make it, it's huge and he's trying to put it back

[00:54:51] into the teapot and it adjusts to size.

[00:54:54] That's why that was so funny because that was literally a tempest in a teapot.

[00:54:58] Got it.

[00:54:59] I didn't know that you didn't know that and I feel bad because you could have laughed harder.

[00:55:04] I could have.

[00:55:05] Yeah.

[00:55:05] And it makes me sad that you didn't have that laughter in your heart that I had that day.

[00:55:10] All right.

[00:55:11] So after six days and nights of apocalyptic storms, the waters finally calmed.

[00:55:15] On the seventh day, the boat rested on a mountain.

[00:55:20] Utnipishtim sent out a dove.

[00:55:21] Literally, it rested on a mountain, huh?

[00:55:23] Yeah, it did.

[00:55:24] Interesting.

[00:55:25] Right?

[00:55:25] He sent out a dove, a swallow, and then a raven to find dry land.

[00:55:31] Wow.

[00:55:31] Right?

[00:55:32] The raven didn't return so he knew it was safe to disembark.

[00:55:36] Okay.

[00:55:37] Grateful but heartbroken, Utnipishtim offered sacrifices.

[00:55:41] I wonder how many Christians actually know about this.

[00:55:45] Um, I would-

[00:55:46] Like, like, literally know about, like, that this story preceded their story.

[00:55:49] I would wager to say that at least 75% of them are unaware.

[00:55:54] Right.

[00:55:55] Yeah.

[00:55:55] I mean, I'm not a gambling woman, but I feel like that's a safe, generous guess.

[00:56:01] Sure.

[00:56:02] Sure.

[00:56:02] All right.

[00:56:03] So, he's sad, and so he- but he's like, yay, I got to live.

[00:56:06] Right?

[00:56:07] So, he offered sacrifices.

[00:56:08] Okay.

[00:56:09] The gods, drawn by the smell, swarmed like motherfucking flies.

[00:56:13] They're like, what the shit is this?

[00:56:15] Right.

[00:56:15] This smells good.

[00:56:16] But then Enlil, he's like, wait, hold the fuck up.

[00:56:19] There's a dude here.

[00:56:20] There's a human motherfucking dude.

[00:56:22] What is up?

[00:56:23] So, he's furious that anyone survived, because the whole point of the storm was to kill everyone.

[00:56:28] Right.

[00:56:29] All right.

[00:56:29] So, Enlil, he's like, the fuck?

[00:56:31] And so, he confronts Aya.

[00:56:33] Okay?

[00:56:34] Yep.

[00:56:34] And Aya's like, you're an asshole anyways.

[00:56:37] Why are you overreacting?

[00:56:38] And he preaches him a lesson on compassion.

[00:56:42] Ours is to forgive.

[00:56:44] We should forgive one another.

[00:56:46] Yeah.

[00:56:46] Like, don't be mad at me.

[00:56:47] Okay.

[00:56:47] And don't be mad at this guy.

[00:56:49] Don't be mad.

[00:56:50] Okay?

[00:56:50] Uh-huh.

[00:56:51] And so, in the end, Enlil relented.

[00:56:54] He's like, good idea.

[00:56:55] Let's not be mad.

[00:56:56] Got it.

[00:56:56] I don't know.

[00:56:57] The conversation was had there, but there were many lines missing from a lot of the tablets

[00:57:03] that these all came from.

[00:57:04] Sure.

[00:57:05] So, they pieced it together.

[00:57:06] Right.

[00:57:07] You know what I mean?

[00:57:07] So, we don't actually know the full story.

[00:57:09] We just kind of fill in the blank guess.

[00:57:11] Well, I'm assuming by the time we got to the Bible, you know, people had filled in what

[00:57:16] they liked and what they didn't like, and they added to and embellished and whatever.

[00:57:20] Geography.

[00:57:21] And that's how we end up with the Bible's, you know, Noah story.

[00:57:23] Yeah.

[00:57:23] Exactly.

[00:57:25] Or the giant that hung on to the side for the Jewish story.

[00:57:31] Right.

[00:57:31] Yeah.

[00:57:31] So, whatever.

[00:57:32] Yeah.

[00:57:33] So, in the end, Enlil relented.

[00:57:35] He forgave.

[00:57:36] He blessed Utnepishtim and his wife, granting them immortality, which that's how Nicholas

[00:57:42] Flamel got mortality.

[00:57:45] Immortality.

[00:57:46] You're going to have to explain that.

[00:57:47] I said Nicholas Flamel.

[00:57:48] Oh my God.

[00:57:48] I meant Gargamel.

[00:57:50] Wait.

[00:57:50] Not Gargamel either.

[00:57:51] No.

[00:57:53] Utnepishtim.

[00:57:54] That's how he...

[00:57:55] Oh God.

[00:57:55] Okay.

[00:57:57] Slow down.

[00:57:57] I'm so sorry.

[00:57:58] Like, I got outside my head for a second.

[00:58:01] I was like, wait, what?

[00:58:02] Okay.

[00:58:03] Let me start over.

[00:58:04] Remember how I said that Gilgamesh went to Utnepishtim and was like, I want to live forever.

[00:58:11] And Utnepishtim was like, no, but here's some algae.

[00:58:15] Here's young stuff, right.

[00:58:16] Yeah.

[00:58:16] Yeah.

[00:58:16] Yeah.

[00:58:17] This is how he got...

[00:58:19] This is the story of how Utnepishtim had the immortality that Gilgamesh wanted.

[00:58:27] Got it.

[00:58:28] Okay.

[00:58:28] Thank you.

[00:58:29] So, they have immortality now.

[00:58:35] Utnepishtim and his wife.

[00:58:37] Yeah.

[00:58:37] And they have a place at the mouth of rivers.

[00:58:39] So, it's like right in the crotch of where the Euphrates and what's the other one?

[00:58:45] Tigris.

[00:58:45] Tigris.

[00:58:46] Yeah.

[00:58:47] Far from mortal concerns.

[00:58:49] Okay.

[00:58:50] So, they get to live forever.

[00:58:51] Yay.

[00:58:52] And that's how humanity survived that particular godly temper tantrum.

[00:58:57] Okay.

[00:58:58] All right.

[00:58:58] All right.

[00:58:59] So, Gilgamesh and Noah similarities.

[00:59:02] Okay.

[00:59:03] Yeah.

[00:59:03] This is just real quick.

[00:59:05] Okay.

[00:59:05] Okay.

[00:59:05] So, first of course, obviously most obvious is flood narrative.

[00:59:09] Right.

[00:59:10] Both stories involve a catastrophic flood sent by divine beings to cleanse the earth.

[00:59:15] Sure.

[00:59:16] Okay.

[00:59:16] Divine warning.

[00:59:18] Nippishtim in Gilgamesh and Noah in the Bible are both warned by gods to prepare for the flood.

[00:59:27] Right.

[00:59:27] Build it and they will come.

[00:59:28] Yep.

[00:59:29] Okay.

[00:59:29] The ark building.

[00:59:30] Both characters are instructed to build a large vessel to survive the deluge and they

[00:59:35] are both given very clear instructions.

[00:59:38] Okay.

[00:59:38] Okay.

[00:59:39] Preservation of life.

[00:59:40] They save themselves, their families, and animals.

[00:59:45] So, in this particular version, yes, they both saved animals.

[00:59:48] Sure.

[00:59:48] Okay.

[00:59:49] Okay.

[00:59:49] That's what you said, too.

[00:59:50] You said that it was the, you know, every living thing.

[00:59:54] So.

[00:59:55] Nippishtim brings craftsmen and stuff like that, like his servants and his slaves and some animals.

[01:00:03] But he wasn't like really given explicit instructions.

[01:00:06] There are a lot of instructions on boat size and wood that Nippishtim has.

[01:00:12] Okay.

[01:00:13] Yeah.

[01:00:13] He receives instructions on the boat.

[01:00:15] He doesn't receive a lot of clear instructions about the animals.

[01:00:18] Noah brings pairs of each animal.

[01:00:21] Like it's spelled out.

[01:00:22] Okay.

[01:00:22] But whatever.

[01:00:23] They both get to save themselves, their families, and some animals.

[01:00:27] Okay.

[01:00:28] Sure.

[01:00:28] So, post-flood sacrifice.

[01:00:32] Both offer sacrifices to the gods or God, whatever, singular, plural, whatever, after the flood.

[01:00:38] And both of those sacrifices are accepted favorably by the god or gods in question.

[01:00:44] Okay.

[01:00:44] Okay.

[01:00:44] And both stories carry themes of mortality and divine will.

[01:00:49] Both narratives address human mortality and divine intervention in human affairs.

[01:00:54] I think that comparison is a bit of a stretch and silly.

[01:00:59] How so?

[01:01:00] But do they address human mortality?

[01:01:03] No, they really don't.

[01:01:05] In the Noah story, it was man sucks.

[01:01:09] He's such a...

[01:01:10] God literally says, I repent of having created man.

[01:01:15] Therefore, I will wipe them out except for you, Noah, because you're the only righteous dude.

[01:01:20] So, get your family, build this boat, bring two of each animal.

[01:01:24] And that's it.

[01:01:26] That is not the story of human mortality.

[01:01:29] That is the story of human death.

[01:01:32] Right.

[01:01:32] Yeah.

[01:01:34] And then, you know, the story is, you know, and then 40 days and 40 nights and, you know, all of that.

[01:01:40] Like, it's...

[01:01:41] That story is yuck, you know?

[01:01:44] Right.

[01:01:45] It's about a rage monster.

[01:01:47] Sure.

[01:01:49] Gilgamesh, he's just...

[01:01:51] I don't know.

[01:01:52] It's different to me.

[01:01:53] Well, the Gilgamesh story is there's stuff about...

[01:01:57] Like, there's a whole story about the living forever and how he got that.

[01:02:00] And then somebody else seeking the immortality and all that.

[01:02:04] Yeah.

[01:02:04] Now, in Noah, in the Noah story, there's the bit where they had long lives and then they...

[01:02:10] I think it was after Noah that they shortened the long lives of humans.

[01:02:13] Yeah.

[01:02:13] Noticeably so.

[01:02:14] Yeah.

[01:02:14] So, I mean, there is some sense of, like, dealing with mortality, I guess.

[01:02:18] But that's not specifically addressed, though.

[01:02:20] That's something that we notice and pull out.

[01:02:23] Right.

[01:02:23] And as we're reading through, we're like, oh, man, they ain't living the hundreds anymore.

[01:02:27] No, they specifically said it.

[01:02:29] I don't recall that.

[01:02:29] It was said in the Bible.

[01:02:30] I don't recall that.

[01:02:31] Yeah, it was.

[01:02:31] All right.

[01:02:32] So, you know, we're just going to disagree on that one.

[01:02:36] I don't think that the Noah story addresses human mortality.

[01:02:40] Okay.

[01:02:41] Okay.

[01:02:41] Divine intervention in human affairs.

[01:02:44] Absolutely.

[01:02:45] 100%.

[01:02:45] Okay.

[01:02:46] All right.

[01:02:47] Gilgamesh and Noah differences now.

[01:02:49] So number one difference is the cultural context.

[01:02:53] Gilgamesh is part of the Mesopotamian mythology, Sumerian and Babylonian.

[01:02:59] Right.

[01:02:59] And, you know, somewhere in there is the Arcadians.

[01:03:02] Yeah.

[01:03:02] Arcadians, not Arcadians.

[01:03:04] Sorry.

[01:03:05] And Noah is from the Judeo-Christian faith.

[01:03:10] So different.

[01:03:12] Right.

[01:03:12] Right.

[01:03:13] Okay.

[01:03:13] Gilgamesh emphasizes polytheism.

[01:03:16] Noah's story centers on monotheism.

[01:03:19] Does it?

[01:03:20] Yeah.

[01:03:20] Because that was still early.

[01:03:22] That was just in Genesis still and there was still a lot of...

[01:03:24] The Elohim Yahweh thing?

[01:03:26] Yes.

[01:03:26] I think it depends who you ask.

[01:03:29] Christians, really hardcore, like the idea that Noah was only ever one God all the time

[01:03:35] always.

[01:03:36] Mm-hmm.

[01:03:36] And I think that probably the Jewish, if they care, they're probably like, whatever.

[01:03:43] You know?

[01:03:44] Well, I feel like it was a religion that kind of evolved over time.

[01:03:47] Yeah.

[01:03:48] Because there's definitely references to, you know, a God collective of types, multiple

[01:03:54] gods type deal earlier on in the Bible at some level, you know?

[01:03:58] Yeah.

[01:03:59] But he always addresses him as my Lord.

[01:04:03] Like, he doesn't like one day say, yo Elohim, and then like five minutes later be like, oh,

[01:04:09] just kidding.

[01:04:09] I don't want to talk to you Elohim.

[01:04:11] I meant Yahweh.

[01:04:12] I just called the wrong guy on the phone.

[01:04:13] Sorry.

[01:04:15] Right.

[01:04:15] But yeah.

[01:04:17] And we aren't reading this in the original form either.

[01:04:20] Right.

[01:04:21] So like, I don't know how, I don't want to say that with 100% authority either.

[01:04:24] So.

[01:04:25] No, but it seemed like they were a pantheon collective more than like competitors.

[01:04:33] So I don't know that it would have been like separate warships in which case, like, it's

[01:04:40] how they get around the God and Jesus and Holy Spirit all being the same, but different,

[01:04:47] but the same.

[01:04:48] You know what I mean?

[01:04:49] Okay.

[01:04:49] Like, I think that Christians would say Elohim and Yahweh were the same, but different, but

[01:04:55] the same.

[01:04:56] Like, that's what I think Christians would say.

[01:04:58] Sure.

[01:04:59] Maybe.

[01:05:00] If, if they had to explain it at all, like if they actually went into like the entomology

[01:05:04] of root words and Hebrew, and they like studied it out and like went abroad and like went to

[01:05:11] Bible college, like hardcore learning learning stuff, scholastics and stuff, and actually

[01:05:16] paid attention and learned that, oh shit, there is stuff.

[01:05:20] Right.

[01:05:21] Right.

[01:05:21] And so the, the problem, I guess the part that I have issue with is that I know that the, that

[01:05:28] Judaism kind of, it was culturally adjacent to, you know, Canaan and things like that where

[01:05:34] Baal was.

[01:05:35] And there's all these other gods, Asherah and, and all these other gods that became somewhat

[01:05:40] enemies through being idols.

[01:05:42] Yeah.

[01:05:43] Of Yahweh.

[01:05:44] Yeah.

[01:05:44] Um, even though, even though they may have been part of the same religion at some point.

[01:05:48] Asherah was married to, I think Elohim at one point or something.

[01:05:52] Right.

[01:05:52] Yeah.

[01:05:52] So like there, there's a lot of, that's where I'm kind of like, I don't know how this all

[01:05:57] breaks down exactly.

[01:05:57] It would take a lot more research from us to figure that out.

[01:06:00] But at some point there definitely was more of a pluralistic God.

[01:06:04] Sure.

[01:06:04] Than there is in the later bits of the Bible.

[01:06:08] So you're gonna, um, disagree on the poly versus monotheism and I'm going to disagree

[01:06:15] on the, I already forgot, but I disagreed with you.

[01:06:19] Um, apparently I said bugs instead of word root history.

[01:06:24] Um, I don't know if the word is etymology or entomology and I can't read.

[01:06:29] It's etymology.

[01:06:29] Okay.

[01:06:29] Well, I can't read that far.

[01:06:30] So I'm just correcting on air so that people know I said the wrong thing.

[01:06:35] But what I meant was word history.

[01:06:37] Right.

[01:06:37] Right.

[01:06:37] That kind of thing.

[01:06:38] Like how, how words go root words and where they came from and that kind of stuff.

[01:06:44] Right.

[01:06:44] Look, I'm interested in it and I like it a lot, but I don't know how to fucking speak

[01:06:48] it.

[01:06:49] Do I look like a goddamn scholar?

[01:06:52] I apparently said, as I've been saying a share wrong the whole time.

[01:06:56] I guess, Ashura, Ashura.

[01:06:59] We've been saying a share.

[01:07:00] Yeah.

[01:07:01] I like a share better.

[01:07:02] Yeah.

[01:07:02] See, we learn all kinds of stuff.

[01:07:03] We're on our lives here.

[01:07:05] Wow.

[01:07:06] I'm not going to be able to sleep.

[01:07:08] That's like our whole podcast.

[01:07:09] We've been saying that wrong.

[01:07:10] I know.

[01:07:10] I won't be able to sleep tonight.

[01:07:12] Trying to make myself remember Ashura, Ashura.

[01:07:16] God damn it.

[01:07:16] And isn't she like the earlier version of Ishtar and Nana or whatever?

[01:07:21] I think there's some sort of a correlation.

[01:07:24] Depending.

[01:07:24] Right.

[01:07:25] Yeah.

[01:07:25] You ask.

[01:07:26] Possibly.

[01:07:26] Right.

[01:07:27] Okay.

[01:07:27] Anyway, let's do more differences.

[01:07:29] Ready?

[01:07:29] Yeah.

[01:07:29] The purpose of the flood.

[01:07:31] In Gilgamesh, the gods send the flood because humanity is too noisy and disruptive.

[01:07:36] Okay.

[01:07:36] They're like, y'all getting up to shenanigans.

[01:07:38] Right.

[01:07:38] Basically, they are partying like it's 1999.

[01:07:42] Okay.

[01:07:43] Sounds similar actually.

[01:07:44] But in Noah's story, God sends the flood due to humanity's wickedness.

[01:07:50] Yeah.

[01:07:50] And moral corruption.

[01:07:52] Partying too hard slash wickedness.

[01:07:54] Those seem pretty.

[01:07:55] Okay.

[01:07:55] No.

[01:07:56] Partying too hard is like, look at all those people.

[01:07:59] They're just having so much sex.

[01:08:01] They're just having so much sex.

[01:08:01] Wickedness and corruption moral is like, they're not just having sex.

[01:08:05] They're like also robbing out of each other's pockets and doing meanness.

[01:08:10] Okay.

[01:08:10] He's saying y'all are mean and bad.

[01:08:13] You are bad people.

[01:08:14] But I gotta say that in the story that we read in the Bible, it seemed like it was very centered around sexual behavior as opposed to stealing.

[01:08:24] Yes, stealing was part of it.

[01:08:26] But the biggest focus was around the sexual deviance of it all.

[01:08:31] Right.

[01:08:32] But okay.

[01:08:32] Which is similar to, you know.

[01:08:34] I think what I'm gonna say is that it's like a comparison between Girls Gone Wild, those Florida college parties that they used to show on MTV.

[01:08:50] In the 90s.

[01:08:50] Yeah.

[01:08:51] Sure.

[01:08:51] Like a long time ago.

[01:08:52] Okay.

[01:08:52] Like, I think it's like that kind of like fuck fest.

[01:08:55] Right?

[01:08:57] Versus, um, you just found out that your kid has had sex for the first time with their partner and, you know, you don't believe in sex before marriage.

[01:09:09] Okay.

[01:09:09] Like that's the difference that I'm drawing in my mind.

[01:09:12] Got it.

[01:09:13] I could be wrong.

[01:09:14] I would have to do a lot more research to figure it to feel comfortable with comparing those two.

[01:09:18] I'm, I'm making a lot of guesses considering that I have not even read Gilgamesh.

[01:09:24] Right.

[01:09:24] Like I have read summaries of from various different sources.

[01:09:28] Sure.

[01:09:29] Because I did not have all that time in the world.

[01:09:31] Yeah.

[01:09:31] But that's, that's what I took from it.

[01:09:33] I could be wrong.

[01:09:34] Okay.

[01:09:34] Okay.

[01:09:34] I said it.

[01:09:35] Sure.

[01:09:35] Okay.

[01:09:36] Number three, the role in the story was different, but Nebishtim was a secondary character in

[01:09:43] the epic of Gilgamesh because the main character is Gilgamesh, right?

[01:09:46] It's his journey.

[01:09:47] It's his quest.

[01:09:48] He goes to see a Nebishtim to like, Oh, all these things happen.

[01:09:53] My best friend or lover just died, blah, blah, blah.

[01:09:55] Like I did all these battles and now I'm coming to a Nebishtim to get, cause I heard

[01:10:00] he survived the flood and got that fucking mortality stone or whatever.

[01:10:04] And I want to live forever.

[01:10:05] Right.

[01:10:06] And so then when we're talking about the flood of Nebishtim is like, Oh, let me tell

[01:10:10] you how I got that.

[01:10:11] And so he's telling, he's a secondary character telling Gilgamesh the story.

[01:10:20] Okay.

[01:10:21] Okay.

[01:10:21] The main character of the story of Gilgamesh is Gilgamesh.

[01:10:24] Got it.

[01:10:25] Okay.

[01:10:25] Yeah.

[01:10:26] It's just like, it's a frame story is, is what the method is called.

[01:10:29] It's a story within a story.

[01:10:31] Right.

[01:10:31] Okay.

[01:10:32] So, um, Nebishtim is narrating his story to Gilgamesh and we, the readers are like looking

[01:10:39] over Gilgamesh's shoulder reading along with him.

[01:10:43] Got it.

[01:10:44] Does that make sense?

[01:10:44] But couldn't you see, like, couldn't you say that the main character of the Bible is

[01:10:49] Jacob?

[01:10:50] Which...

[01:10:50] No, because the protagonist of the Noah narrative in Genesis is Noah.

[01:10:56] He's not telling somebody else his story.

[01:10:58] The book of Noah is, it's Noah's book.

[01:11:01] Well, it's not the book of Noah, but the story of Noah, right?

[01:11:04] Okay.

[01:11:04] But it, like, he's the one that we follow.

[01:11:09] Okay.

[01:11:09] He's the main character that we follow through that.

[01:11:11] But this...

[01:11:12] Okay.

[01:11:12] All right.

[01:11:13] I'm not going to dissect it any further because I don't know what I'm talking about

[01:11:16] exactly.

[01:11:16] I see what you're saying, but it's, it's not like we're with one character and then this

[01:11:23] other guy pops in his head for a minute and then we go back to the other character, right?

[01:11:26] With the Bible, you're reading one character until they pass along and then it passes along

[01:11:33] to another character and then it passes on...

[01:11:35] Like, it doesn't go back to...

[01:11:37] Right.

[01:11:37] But the theme could have been put in there for the reasoning, the same reasoning that it

[01:11:41] was in the other place.

[01:11:43] I'm not following.

[01:11:44] Mm-hmm.

[01:11:45] The reasoning, the story of Noah in the Bible could have been used in a similar manner

[01:11:51] for the Bible as a whole, the Old Testament as a whole, so that it builds as part of that

[01:11:58] whole story and narrative for Jacob, which is Israel, which is the whole, you know, like

[01:12:03] Jacob is the main focus of the Old Testament, which again, I'm not, I don't want to try to

[01:12:09] dig into it that much because I don't want to, you know, I'm just, I'm just saying.

[01:12:13] I hear what you're saying.

[01:12:14] It's just that Noah, in the flood story, it's Noah's flood story, right?

[01:12:19] Yeah.

[01:12:20] There's nobody else's flood story.

[01:12:21] Nobody else is involved in that.

[01:12:22] No, you're probably right.

[01:12:23] With Nupishtim, it is his story, but he's telling it to somebody who is the main character.

[01:12:29] Gotcha.

[01:12:30] Okay.

[01:12:31] It's a literary thing.

[01:12:33] So, okay.

[01:12:34] Anyway, the outcome was different.

[01:12:37] Nupishtim gains immortality after the flood, right?

[01:12:40] Yeah.

[01:12:40] Noah doesn't become immortal, but is blessed to repopulate the earth with people who, you

[01:12:47] know, live less long.

[01:12:49] Right.

[01:12:50] So that's, that's a very big difference.

[01:12:53] Wait, say that again?

[01:12:54] So it was...

[01:12:55] Nupishtim.

[01:12:56] Yeah.

[01:12:56] After he survives the flood.

[01:12:58] Yeah.

[01:12:58] The gods give him immortality.

[01:13:00] Right.

[01:13:00] Right.

[01:13:01] Yeah.

[01:13:01] He gets to live forever.

[01:13:02] Yay.

[01:13:03] Okay.

[01:13:03] Noah does not become immortal, but he is blessed to repopulate the earth with people who don't

[01:13:12] even get to live as long as he did.

[01:13:14] Right.

[01:13:15] Well, it wasn't the other guy repopulating the earth too?

[01:13:19] Yes.

[01:13:20] But what's the...

[01:13:21] I'm trying to figure out what the difference is you're trying to get at.

[01:13:23] Um, I don't know.

[01:13:25] We don't, because we don't talk about it.

[01:13:27] Because that part of the story isn't in a Nupishtim story.

[01:13:32] Okay.

[01:13:33] I mean, that I'm aware of.

[01:13:34] I thought you said something about that actually when you were reading through your notes.

[01:13:38] So...

[01:13:39] I don't know.

[01:13:39] I just...

[01:13:40] That was why I was questioning it, I guess.

[01:13:42] Okay.

[01:13:42] So...

[01:13:43] I don't know.

[01:13:43] Okay.

[01:13:44] No, I'm just trying to figure this out.

[01:13:46] I probably...

[01:13:46] No, I've been squirrely all day.

[01:13:47] I probably fucked that one up too.

[01:13:48] I have fucked up a lot in this episode.

[01:13:51] So, um, just assume I'm wrong.

[01:13:55] All right.

[01:13:56] The next difference is the vessel design.

[01:13:59] Um, Nupishtim's Ark is a massive cube-like structure.

[01:14:03] Okay.

[01:14:04] So he's given...

[01:14:05] Like the Borg?

[01:14:05] Yes.

[01:14:06] Okay.

[01:14:06] He's given explicit directions just like Noah is.

[01:14:09] Yeah.

[01:14:09] But his make a box.

[01:14:12] Okay?

[01:14:13] They didn't know much about building ships back then.

[01:14:15] No.

[01:14:15] Noah's Ark is like a shoe box.

[01:14:18] Right.

[01:14:18] Up Nupishtim's is like a Rubik's cube box.

[01:14:21] Okay?

[01:14:22] Okay, yeah.

[01:14:22] Yeah.

[01:14:23] So, Noah's Ark is a long regular boat with specific dimensions provided by God.

[01:14:27] Now, Up Nupishtim's Ark has some specific dimensions too.

[01:14:31] Otherwise we wouldn't...

[01:14:32] Oh, really?

[01:14:33] But not as many.

[01:14:35] Like, remember how it was like pages and pages and pages of numbers and type of one,

[01:14:38] blah, blah, blah, blah, blah for Noah's Ark?

[01:14:40] Was it?

[01:14:41] Yeah.

[01:14:42] I thought...

[01:14:42] Okay.

[01:14:43] Like he told him lots of directions on how to build that fucking thing.

[01:14:46] Are you sure you're not confusing that with like the, um, the Ark of the Covenant

[01:14:50] and stuff like that?

[01:14:51] It all blends together.

[01:14:52] Or the tabernacle or...

[01:14:53] It all blends together because God gave so many fucking dimensions.

[01:14:55] I mean they did give directions but I don't remember it being pages and pages so...

[01:14:58] Okay.

[01:14:58] I remember it being tedious but I might be just meshing it all together into one big slop

[01:15:04] pile of garbage.

[01:15:06] Right.

[01:15:06] Um, but Up Nupishtim for sure he got fewer directions than Noah did even if Noah didn't

[01:15:16] have as many as I remember him having.

[01:15:18] Okay.

[01:15:19] Because Up Nupishtim was like, yeah, build this and this and make it this long.

[01:15:23] Cool.

[01:15:24] You good?

[01:15:25] You good.

[01:15:25] Okay.

[01:15:25] And he had like lots of worker mans helping him, craftsmen.

[01:15:30] Sure.

[01:15:30] So, he was good.

[01:15:32] He didn't need help.

[01:15:33] Okay.

[01:15:33] But, or he didn't need help from God.

[01:15:35] But Noah did, he, maybe he didn't give, maybe God didn't give Noah as explicit directions

[01:15:42] as I'm recalling but he still gave him some pretty fucking explicit directions.

[01:15:46] Okay.

[01:15:47] Okay.

[01:15:47] So, that's another difference.

[01:15:49] Got it.

[01:15:49] It's a mild difference.

[01:15:51] Um, the last one is length of the flood.

[01:15:55] In Gilgamesh, the flood lasts six days and seven nights.

[01:15:59] That's not 40.

[01:16:00] It's not, no.

[01:16:01] In Noah's story, the flood lasts 40 days and 40 nights with waters prevailing for 150 days.

[01:16:08] Right.

[01:16:09] Yeah.

[01:16:09] Yeah.

[01:16:10] So, that's a big difference.

[01:16:12] And boy, that Amalekite giant guy just hung on to that boat the whole time.

[01:16:17] I mean, according to Jewish legend.

[01:16:18] Yes.

[01:16:18] Okay.

[01:16:20] Ready?

[01:16:21] I've located my monocle and shall now regale you with what not and what have you.

[01:16:26] Okay.

[01:16:26] Okay.

[01:16:27] Tales of Gilgamesh's legendary exploits are narrated in five surviving Sumerian poems.

[01:16:34] I'm not going to like go over a lot.

[01:16:36] It's like a sentence or two for each of the five.

[01:16:38] Okay.

[01:16:43] Okay.

[01:16:45] And another world in which Gilgamesh comes to the aid of the goddess Inanna, Ishtar, and

[01:16:52] drives away the creatures that are infesting her hulupu tree.

[01:16:56] She gives him two unknown objects, a Miku and a Piku, but not a Pikachu.

[01:17:03] Okay.

[01:17:04] Okay.

[01:17:04] And then he immediately loses both of them.

[01:17:07] Okay.

[01:17:07] After Enkidu's death, his shade tells Gilgamesh about the bleak conditions of the underworld.

[01:17:14] Dude, it sucks down here.

[01:17:16] Okay.

[01:17:17] Yeah.

[01:17:17] All right.

[01:17:18] The next one is the poem Gilgamesh and Aga, which describes Gilgamesh's revolt against his

[01:17:24] overlord, Aga of Kish.

[01:17:26] That's a whole different story that we didn't even get into.

[01:17:28] Okay.

[01:17:29] All right.

[01:17:29] Another Sumerian poem relates Gilgamesh's defeat of the giant Huwawa or Humbaba.

[01:17:36] That's what he was referred to in most of the sources that I was thinking.

[01:17:39] But not a Chihuahua.

[01:17:39] Not a Chihuahua.

[01:17:41] Okay.

[01:17:41] Yeah.

[01:17:41] And he was the guardian of the cedar forest to which Gilgamesh ventures with his companion

[01:17:47] Enkidu.

[01:17:48] Okay.

[01:17:48] His companion.

[01:17:50] The subsequent encounter leads to the death of Humbaba, which provokes the anger of the gods.

[01:17:54] Okay.

[01:17:55] So that was the third one.

[01:17:56] Okay.

[01:17:56] Right.

[01:17:57] One tells the story of Gilgamesh's defeat of the bull of heaven.

[01:18:01] That's the fourth one.

[01:18:02] Okay.

[01:18:02] And the fifth poorly preserved poem relates the account of his death and funeral.

[01:18:07] What?

[01:18:08] Hmm.

[01:18:09] He dies.

[01:18:10] As coroner, I must have arrived thoroughly examined her and she is not merely, merely dead.

[01:18:17] She's most really, most sincerely dead.

[01:18:20] I messed that up really bad, but it's from the Wizard of Oz and I wanted to sing it so

[01:18:24] good.

[01:18:25] And my throat hurts.

[01:18:26] And also I fucked up the tune from the beginning.

[01:18:29] And now I'm just sad.

[01:18:31] You could edit that out.

[01:18:32] I'm not editing that out.

[01:18:34] All right.

[01:18:35] Why you gotta be like that?

[01:18:37] All right.

[01:18:37] So we're getting to the end here.

[01:18:38] Okay.

[01:18:39] I see you like giving me the sign.

[01:18:41] We're really like an hour and a half.

[01:18:42] So, well, you're going to edit out a lot of coughs and stuff.

[01:18:46] Okay.

[01:18:46] It'd be like an hour and 25 minutes.

[01:18:48] Whatever.

[01:18:49] Just okay.

[01:18:50] Listen, Gilgamesh's death is not explicitly described in the Epic of Gilgamesh as we have

[01:18:57] it today, but there are some clues and later traditions that still fill in the gaps.

[01:19:01] Okay.

[01:19:02] By the end of the Epic, Gilgamesh has already gone through a major transformation.

[01:19:08] He's returned to his city, Yurik, after failing to achieve immortality, but he's made

[01:19:14] peace with his mortality, right?

[01:19:16] Okay.

[01:19:17] He's like, well, if I have to, you know, die, I'm going to make sure that my city and my

[01:19:22] name go on as long as possible.

[01:19:25] Right, right.

[01:19:25] The heart will go on.

[01:19:27] Okay.

[01:19:28] He realizes his legacy isn't about living forever.

[01:19:31] It's about the lasting impact of his city, his reign, and the Epic story itself.

[01:19:36] In later Sumerian texts, such as the death of Gilgamesh, we get more details.

[01:19:43] Okay.

[01:19:44] Okay.

[01:19:45] Divine judgment.

[01:19:46] After a long and successful reign, the gods decree that Gilgamesh must die.

[01:19:51] Okay.

[01:19:52] Okay.

[01:19:52] Because even someone two-thirds divine cannot escape mortality.

[01:19:57] I see.

[01:19:57] They're like, bitch, bye.

[01:19:58] Right.

[01:19:59] Burial and legacy.

[01:20:02] Okay.

[01:20:03] Mm-hmm.

[01:20:03] He's given a grand burial, complete with riches and offerings, befitting a king.

[01:20:09] His people entomb him in the Euphrates River or nearby waterway, whatever.

[01:20:14] We don't know.

[01:20:15] Sure.

[01:20:15] Sure.

[01:20:15] We just guess and it doesn't matter.

[01:20:17] No, no, nothing matters.

[01:20:19] What is time?

[01:20:19] Right.

[01:20:20] But this Euphrates or Euphrates adjacent thing, him being enshrined there shows his deep connection

[01:20:27] to both his city and the land.

[01:20:30] Sure.

[01:20:30] But I think it also shows his connection to the waterway that went right through the city.

[01:20:36] Yeah.

[01:20:37] Now, ultimately, Gilgamesh's death emphasizes the Epic's main theme.

[01:20:42] Mortality is inevitable, but living a meaningful life ensures you'll be remembered.

[01:20:48] His name and story have survived for over 4,000 years.

[01:20:52] So, mission accomplished.

[01:20:54] He did it.

[01:20:55] Yeah.

[01:20:55] He did.

[01:20:56] He did.

[01:20:56] And his story still fucking slaps, like I said.

[01:20:59] Does it not?

[01:21:01] I mean, I had to rush the end there, but there's still so much more I could say.

[01:21:06] Like, there's so much more I could correct myself on.

[01:21:08] Yeah.

[01:21:08] There's so many other like, wait, what was that?

[01:21:11] Who's that?

[01:21:11] No, I feel like there's a lot in there that's going to require us to dig deeper into that

[01:21:15] because...

[01:21:16] That was just, this was just like an overview of Gilgamesh.

[01:21:19] Right.

[01:21:19] Because it was time to talk about him.

[01:21:21] Sure.

[01:21:22] Sure.

[01:21:22] So, maybe we'll do a part two when we do our next bonus or something.

[01:21:28] I don't know.

[01:21:29] Yeah.

[01:21:29] No, I just, I am, this one almost deserves like a, a Q&A and a, you know, wrap up type

[01:21:36] thing so that we can...

[01:21:37] Like it's its own book.

[01:21:38] ...correct some of the things maybe that we were wrong about because...

[01:21:40] Oh, fuck off.

[01:21:41] No, no, no, no, I'm, it's important, right?

[01:21:44] No, it is.

[01:21:44] It is.

[01:21:44] It is.

[01:21:46] It's important that we try to be as correct as possible with the information that we're

[01:21:53] giving.

[01:21:53] As fact-based as possible given that we're reading fiction that people thought was facts.

[01:21:58] And we try to say...

[01:21:58] And we try to say that, you know, when we don't know, we don't know.

[01:22:01] It's true.

[01:22:02] So, I'm just trying to hold to that theme with us.

[01:22:04] No, you're right.

[01:22:04] And I appreciate that.

[01:22:05] And make sure that we do that.

[01:22:06] So...

[01:22:07] I appreciate that.

[01:22:07] Um, and this is obviously because of how it interacts with biblical stories.

[01:22:13] Mm-hmm.

[01:22:13] It's important.

[01:22:14] It is.

[01:22:15] Right?

[01:22:15] As far as the whole finding out where these stories came from.

[01:22:20] You know, this is something that I don't think most Christians really realize that

[01:22:24] their, their Bible stories were based on something that is not actually biblical.

[01:22:29] Right.

[01:22:29] Or even Judean.

[01:22:31] Right.

[01:22:31] Or anything.

[01:22:32] Right.

[01:22:32] Like not, not anything that they would recognize.

[01:22:34] Even as old as this story is, this story sprang from another before it.

[01:22:40] I can't remember the guy's name.

[01:22:42] It's some guy I've never fucking heard of.

[01:22:44] Okay.

[01:22:44] So, we could even do like a part three on who the fuck is that guy?

[01:22:48] Because he has a flood story.

[01:22:51] Sure.

[01:22:52] Yeah.

[01:22:53] Everybody has a flood story.

[01:22:54] Flood stories back then were probably pretty popular.

[01:22:56] They were a diamond fucking dozen.

[01:22:57] Right.

[01:22:57] Just like, you know, earthquakes and volcanoes or whatever.

[01:23:00] Sure.

[01:23:01] Yeah.

[01:23:01] That's what else was happening, you know?

[01:23:03] Not Netflix.

[01:23:04] That's for sure.

[01:23:04] Other than war, you know?

[01:23:05] Yeah.

[01:23:05] So.

[01:23:06] Yeah.

[01:23:07] All right.

[01:23:07] You got anything else to go over before we get out of here?

[01:23:09] I'm, I read and talked a lot in my throat.

[01:23:13] My, like my voice is about shot.

[01:23:15] Yeah.

[01:23:15] So no.

[01:23:16] All right.

[01:23:17] I'm good.

[01:23:17] Well, so that was Gilgamesh.

[01:23:20] Part one.

[01:23:21] Part one.

[01:23:22] And actually we'll be back tomorrow with.

[01:23:25] Um, we are reading Jonah.

[01:23:27] Yeah.

[01:23:28] Chapter three.

[01:23:29] All right.

[01:23:29] We'll see you guys then.

[01:23:30] Bye.

[01:23:31] Bye.

[01:23:31] Bye.