Jeremiah Chapter 37: Atheist Bible Study

[00:00:00] Hey everyone, husband here, and I'm Wife. If you've been listening to us then you know

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[00:01:16] Welcome to Sacrilegious Discourse. I'm husband and I'm wife. Together we're reading the

[00:01:20] Bible for the very first time. We grew up without religion and wanted to know what all the fuss was

[00:01:25] about. Well, what have we learned so far? That God is a dick and apparently some people believe in

[00:01:31] talking donkeys. We're not trying to pass ourselves off as experts. Nope, we're just reading the

[00:01:35] Bible for the first time and giving our first take reaction. If you'd like to join us in

[00:01:39] this venture you might consider starting that episode one. Otherwise jump in wherever you like.

[00:01:44] All right, let's go read the Bible. Yeah, let's get to it.

[00:01:50] Husband! Wife! Where have we been? What's happening? What's going on? Sick as fuck is where we've been.

[00:01:56] Well, that's where you've been. That's where I've been. Oh man. There needs to be like a

[00:02:01] stipulation before any family outing that if you've been sick prior to the outing,

[00:02:05] don't fucking show up. Yeah. Just saying. Yeah. That's just, you know... It's just

[00:02:10] good manners. Right. Because if you have been sick and then the next day you go to a family outing,

[00:02:18] you're the asshole because you are literally getting your family sick. That being said,

[00:02:23] I love my family very much. I too love your family very much. But I am suffering consequences.

[00:02:29] You are suffering and I am suffering as a consequence of you suffering consequences.

[00:02:34] Yeah. So anyway, I've been sick. Yeah. And so we haven't done a podcast in a couple of days.

[00:02:41] No, sorry. But I believe the last thing that we did was Jeremiah chapter 36. That is correct, sir.

[00:02:48] And in that one, I believe God told Jeremiah to write down all the shit that he said.

[00:02:55] And so Jeremiah was like, Hey, Baruch, write down all the shit that I said.

[00:02:59] Yeah. Yeah. He passed the buck. Yeah. And then he told Baruch to bring it to some people that were

[00:03:06] going to listen to him. Princes and guys. And they were like, Oh man, that's cool. That sounds legit.

[00:03:12] We should totally take that to the king. Then they took it to the king and the king was like,

[00:03:16] Put that shit in the fire. Fuck off. Yeah. And then they rewrote it again.

[00:03:19] Yeah. Because God wanted the right of their parents again. God was like, rewrite it. Yeah.

[00:03:23] And Jeremiah was like, Baruch, you heard the God. And then Baruch was like,

[00:03:27] actually I didn't. And Jeremiah was like, Do I have to do everything myself?

[00:03:32] So that was Jeremiah chapter 36. Sure as fuck was. Which means that today we're getting into

[00:03:37] Jeremiah chapter 37. All right, let's do this. Okey dokey.

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[00:05:21] code a cast. All right, we are hopping into Jeremiah chapter 37. Okay, couple notes before we start

[00:05:35] this chapter is numbered as Jeremiah chapter 44 in the Septuagint. Okay, which is the Greek

[00:05:43] translation. Yeah. Okay. This also is the start of a narrative section. So it's like a story

[00:05:51] of its own. Okay. Starting here, chapter 37 through chapter 44. Got it. Okay. So that's what's

[00:05:59] happening. Okay. Yep. Now, now King Zedekiah, the son of Josiah, reigned instead of Canaia,

[00:06:08] the son of Joachim, whom Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon made king in the land of Judah.

[00:06:14] So somebody was ruling this Nebuchadnezzar didn't want to rule. Okay, here's the thing.

[00:06:20] The reign of Canaia or Jechanaia depending on who you talk to. Yeah, right. He it was very short.

[00:06:27] It lasted only a few months. Oh, I can remember this. 598 BCE. Yeah, me too. Right. Okay. Yeah.

[00:06:33] His reign ended so quickly because Nebuchadnezzar came for a second time to subject Jerusalem

[00:06:40] under his control. Do you remember that? Yes. Okay. In taking the throne, Zedekiah was pledged

[00:06:47] to obey Nebuchadnezzar. Okay. Now, because of the Egyptian influence at court, Zedekiah decided to

[00:06:55] break his pledge with Babylon, which was the immediate cause of the final siege of Jerusalem.

[00:07:02] Okay. All right. So that's where we are. So again, lots of politics. Yes. Lots of politics. Okay.

[00:07:09] But neither he nor his servants nor the people of the land gave heed to the words of the Lord

[00:07:15] which he spoke by the prophet Jeremiah. Okay. Okay. And Zedekiah, the king, sent Jechal,

[00:07:23] the son of Shalamiah and Zephaniah, the son of Messiah, the priest to the prophet Jeremiah.

[00:07:33] Okay. Okay. So Zedekiah sent two guys. Yeah. Okay. Saying pray now to the Lord our God for us.

[00:07:40] So Zedekiah is in a bit of a bind and he's like, you two dudes go talk to Jeremiah. See if he can

[00:07:48] help us with the God dude. Yeah. Like shit is getting real. Right. I'm not prepared to like

[00:07:54] publicly be like, oopsie my bad. Okay. Sorry God. But go see if he can maybe like secret a deal

[00:08:02] for us. Right. Right. Yeah. Now, Jeremiah was coming and going among the people for they

[00:08:08] had not yet put him in prison. So this is before that time. Right. Because Baruch don't know how to

[00:08:12] tell story straight. Okay. Because you know Baruch is writing this shit down. Yeah. Yeah. He wrote

[00:08:17] this shit all out of order. You know what? You want a job done well. We don't know that he wrote

[00:08:24] a lot of order. We know that somebody put it in here out of nowhere. No, I'm blaming Baruch.

[00:08:28] Okay. I'm blaming Baruch. He's like, make me write this shit. I'll show you. He wrote it

[00:08:33] all down, but he wrote it all out of order. That's what I think happened. And Jeremiah was like

[00:08:38] as they were running from the Babylonians, like they just lost so they dropped them all

[00:08:41] on the ground and then they picked them up in the wrong order. Well, Baruch wasn't the one running.

[00:08:47] Well, I'm just saying, you know, maybe they were they were in a hurry to get somewhere

[00:08:50] and they just dropped them. That's how they that's how they ended up, you know? I don't

[00:08:53] know. I think that Baruch was a little bit salty. Okay. Because he's like, make me write this

[00:09:00] shit. God told you to do it asshole. Well, there's been lots of scholars between now and then that

[00:09:05] could have put this back in the right order even back when they still rearrange. Okay,

[00:09:08] I will give you that. I don't I don't really buy that. I will give you that except maybe,

[00:09:14] maybe they had notes that we don't have that said Jeremiah is a prick. Let's put this.

[00:09:21] Let's keep this out of order just as like, yeah. Okay. I'm just saying it could be.

[00:09:27] Yeah, right. Okay. Then Pharaoh's army came up from Egypt and when the Chaldeans who were

[00:09:34] besieged Jerusalem heard news of them, they departed from Jerusalem. So we've heard this story

[00:09:40] out. Yeah. Then the word of the Lord came to the prophet Jeremiah saying thus says the Lord,

[00:09:47] the God of Israel. Thus you shall say to the king of Judah, who sent you to me to inquire of

[00:09:53] me, behold Pharaoh's army which has come up to you or I'm sorry, which has come up to help you

[00:10:00] will return to Egypt to their own land. So he's like, they ain't gonna help you for long. Yeah.

[00:10:06] I don't know why y'all depending on them stupid. Got it. And the Chaldeans shall come back and

[00:10:11] fight against this city and take it and burn it with fire. Okay. Okay. Thus says the Lord,

[00:10:18] do not deceive yourselves and the Chaldeans will surely depart from us for they will not depart.

[00:10:24] For though you had defeated the whole army of the Chaldeans who fight against you

[00:10:28] and there remained only wounded men among them, they still would rise up every man in his tent

[00:10:34] and burn the fucking city with fire. So he's like even if they only had 10 broken men left.

[00:10:40] Those people would destroy the city. Yeah. Okay. Y'all need to lay down arms. Got it.

[00:10:45] This is not happening. I kind of doubt they only had 10 people left though. No, no. But God is

[00:10:50] saying even if that were the case, right? He's not saying that was the case. He's saying I'm telling

[00:10:55] you now, even if this happened, sure y'all would still fucking lose. But I don't believe them.

[00:11:01] No, I don't either. So I don't need that. All right. So I have some notes. Yeah. Okay. So

[00:11:08] it says that Pharaoh's army came up from Egypt. Yeah. The Pharaoh that they're talking about is

[00:11:15] Hoferah or Aperis. This depends because it's spelled different ways. Okay. Okay, but it's the same guy

[00:11:22] and he was the fourth king of the 26th dynasty of Egypt and he ruled from 598 to about 570 BCE.

[00:11:34] Okay. Yeah. He forged an alliance with Zedekiah to rebel against Babylon, sending an army in the

[00:11:40] summer of 588 BCE. Okay. Yeah. This caused the Chaldeans to temporarily lift the siege in Jerusalem

[00:11:48] to deal with the Egyptians. However, he retreated before actually joining the battle,

[00:11:54] leaving Jerusalem to fall to the Babylonians in 587 BCE. Got it. Okay. Yeah. So that's

[00:12:01] where we sit. Okay. Okay. And it happened when the army of the Chaldeans left the siege of Jerusalem

[00:12:08] for fear of Pharaoh's army that Jeremiah went out of Jerusalem to go into the land of Benjamin to

[00:12:14] claim his property there among the people. This is where he bought the... Where he had bought

[00:12:18] that land. Yeah. And there's like some question, like what do you mean he left

[00:12:22] Jerusalem to go into the land of Benjamin? Like he literally bought land in Jerusalem.

[00:12:28] What the fuck are you talking about? Well, Benjamin was a separate section of... It wasn't

[00:12:33] Jerusalem. It wasn't Jerusalem's a city, right? Yes. But that's what I'm saying. Remember

[00:12:37] when he was in jail and he bought land? Yeah. He bought land in Jerusalem. Okay. And this says

[00:12:44] he went out of Jerusalem to go into the land of Benjamin. And so people are like, wait, what?

[00:12:50] Got it. Okay. But they're thinking that maybe there was like a misunderstanding of how it

[00:12:57] was written or translated and that probably he went with a bunch of Benjaminites. Benjaminites.

[00:13:03] Okay. Well, I think this is... It's really weird that we're like... This is the same exact story

[00:13:09] we've heard just a different way. Like, you know, like we've already heard this almost verbatim.

[00:13:15] No, not this part. We heard about the army and the war and that part. Yeah. But we also

[00:13:21] heard him buy in the land. No. We heard about him buying the land. We did not hear

[00:13:26] about him. Now he's going to go see his land. Right. Okay. All right. So this is not the same

[00:13:31] part of that story. Okay. And when he was in the gate of Benjamin, a captain of the guard was there

[00:13:37] whose name was Eryja, the son of Shalamaya, the son of Hananiah. And he seized Jeremiah the prophet

[00:13:46] saying you're gonna love this. Okay. Ready? You in particular are gonna love this. This

[00:13:52] is what the guard said. You are defecting to the Chaldeans. Exactly what I've been saying.

[00:13:58] Right? That's why I said you're gonna love this. Right? Then Jeremiah goes,

[00:14:01] false! I am not defecting to the Chaldeans. Do you believe him? No. Right? No, because this whole

[00:14:07] thing is... Whatever. I know. You've been saying this whole time. I'm pretty sure he's a goddamn

[00:14:13] spy for Babylon. Right. Yeah. That's the way it's been... I mean, it's the way it sounds.

[00:14:17] Yeah. Exactly. But he did not listen to them. The guard didn't listen to the argument. So Eryja

[00:14:23] is that how I said it before? Eryja seized Jeremiah and brought him to the princes.

[00:14:29] He's good on him. Right? Yeah. Okay, these are different princes than the princes before he went

[00:14:35] to jail. Okay. And that's important because these guys... They don't like them. No. Okay. Therefore,

[00:14:41] the princes were angry with Jeremiah and they struck him and put him in prison in the house

[00:14:46] of Jonathan the scribe, you know, Jonathan. I mean this really vindicates a lot of my ideas

[00:14:50] that I had. I know. They're probably angry at him because it seems like he's...

[00:14:54] It at least is plausible that he is working against them. He was in league. Yeah. Maybe not working

[00:14:59] against them so much as like in league with the Babylon. Right, yeah. Like, he might not be

[00:15:05] actively working against Jerusalem or whatever. Right. But he clearly was trying to play both

[00:15:11] sides. Yeah. So to save his own ass. Right. Right. But they had made that the prison,

[00:15:18] you know, Jonathan the scribe. Sure. Right? Yeah. Okay. So now I have some notes. So let's go back

[00:15:24] and read some notes. Okay. All right. This was some 15 years after the sympathetic princes of Judah

[00:15:31] described in the previous chapter. Okay. Okay. So remember I told you different guys.

[00:15:35] Right. Okay. A new generation because 15 years later, a new generation and new conditions

[00:15:41] brought forth leaders with absolutely no sympathy to Jeremiah or his message.

[00:15:46] Got it. They were like, nah. Sure. Temporary arrangements had been made to incarcerate Jeremiah

[00:15:54] in the house of the secretary of state. Okay. That's who this Jonathan the scribe was. Okay.

[00:16:01] And cisterns were sometimes used to imprison arrested people and that is a pit or a hole

[00:16:08] where the prisoner could neither walk nor comfortably lie. Hmm. Okay. So when they...

[00:16:13] Sounds just like a hole in the ground basically. That's exactly what it is. Got it. So that's what

[00:16:17] the prison is. Okay. Yeah. When Jeremiah entered the dungeon and the cells, dungeon, like we all

[00:16:23] have a dungeon in our house. Jonathan the scribe has one. We have one. You know, you know how

[00:16:28] you do, right? Right. So anyway, when Jeremiah entered the dungeon and the cells and Jeremiah

[00:16:33] had remained there many days, then Zedekiah the king sent and took him out. The king asked

[00:16:40] him secretly in his house and said, Hey, is there any word from the Lord? Can you keep this on the

[00:16:48] DL? And Jeremiah said, Hey, as a matter of fact, there is. Oh, okay. Right. Then he said,

[00:16:56] You shall be delivered into the hands of the king of Babylon. Boom. Even though you

[00:17:00] stuck me in a fucking cistern, my story hasn't changed. Right. That's awfully brave. Yeah,

[00:17:07] it is. It is right. Moreover, I mean, I guess it's supposed to lend credence to his is

[00:17:12] really saying he's he's he's literally getting out of jail going to talk to the king and telling

[00:17:17] the king, No, you're still fucked. Yeah. Yeah. So that's yeah. I think that he totally knew

[00:17:23] what was coming though and was like, it doesn't matter if you kill me now or not. Like,

[00:17:28] it's still coming. It's still coming. Right. Like whatever. Well, to be fair,

[00:17:33] if he was working with the if he did know that the Babylonians, the child, Chalions or whatever

[00:17:39] are going to be that much of a force and destroying them. Yeah. Even if he just, you know, knew that

[00:17:44] intuitively, right, whether it be from God or not, right? That's what I'm saying. Or if he

[00:17:49] had some insight in information, either way, a bit of both, right? If he had this idea

[00:17:53] that they were going to destroy them, it's better to be on their side. But like, it's

[00:17:58] better to not it's better to say, yeah, they're going to totally whip our ass. You know,

[00:18:02] then there's a say, no, we're going to stand up and fight against them. Right. Exactly. Because

[00:18:07] your name is attached to ring later, right fighting against instead of like, maybe he's

[00:18:13] got a chance if Zedekai doesn't have him killed, maybe he's got a chance to survive.

[00:18:18] He can totally be like, I was saying you guys would take over the whole time. Guys.

[00:18:21] Remember, thank you for that insider information. Yeah, I did try to help you. You will recall

[00:18:26] and I was jailed as a matter of fact. Right. So could you not? Yeah, I just can't buy that it's

[00:18:33] God when there's so much other politics going on with regard to the Egyptians and everything else.

[00:18:37] Exactly. Exactly. Okay, but Jeremiah had more to say. Okay. Moreover, Jeremiah said to Kings

[00:18:44] at Akhaya, what offense have I committed against you, against your servants or against this people

[00:18:49] that you have put me in fucking prison? Where now are your prophets who prophesied to you,

[00:18:56] saying the king of Babylon will not come against you or against this land. So he's got a fair point.

[00:19:01] Yeah. Those guys are gone because they were like, no, no, Babylon and coming. What? Get the

[00:19:10] book out of here. This is great. Everything's fine. It's fine. Nothing's going to happen.

[00:19:14] We're fine. Right. And so now he's like, do you see them? I don't see them. They're not here. So

[00:19:20] what's up? Right. Why are you mad at me? I'm the one that told you this was happening. From

[00:19:24] the get go. Yeah. Yeah. Therefore, please hear now, oh my Lord, the fucking king, please

[00:19:32] let my petition be accepted before you and do not make me return to the house of Jonathan

[00:19:38] the scribe. Let's die there. Right. Yeah. Okay. So, um, yeah. Sorry. I thought I might have had

[00:19:48] another note. No, no, you're good. Okay. Don't have another note. Was that so was that? No. Oh,

[00:19:52] no, there's a little bit left. I was just checking to make sure I didn't have any notes on that little

[00:19:55] side. Got it. Okay. Yeah. No, we're almost done. Hang tight. Okay. I'm hanging. Then

[00:20:00] Zedekaya the king commanded that they should commit Jeremiah to the court of the prison

[00:20:06] and that they should give him daily a piece of bread from the baker's street

[00:20:10] until all the bread in the city was gone. So he's still gonna imprison him? Yeah. Just not as badly.

[00:20:15] Thus, Jeremiah remained in the court of the prison the end. I see. Yeah. So he's like, well,

[00:20:21] you gave me bad information. So not bad information. You gave me information I didn't

[00:20:26] want to hear. So I'm still got a, I'm on a three in jail, but I'm not going to put you

[00:20:30] in a pit. I'm going to put you in white collar jail. Yeah. Instead of like, I'm going to put you

[00:20:35] in the prison that if Trump ever went to prison, he would go to that prison instead of like,

[00:20:41] where all the rapists and bad guys go, right? He's like, technically, yes, you've been the one

[00:20:45] that's right. Been right most of the time. You're right. You're right. You're right.

[00:20:49] I want to prison you real hard. Yeah. I still, I mean, you still were clearly working

[00:20:54] with the child. Yeah, I just can't get over that. Like, I'm just, he's, I don't know,

[00:20:59] it just the whole thing. I mean, we're reading this from his perspective. Right. And even from

[00:21:04] his perspective, it still looks like nah, dude. Right. Yeah. If you're writing in it, I still

[00:21:09] think like without even somebody telling me that you might be a double agent or something,

[00:21:14] yeah, then you probably are right. You know? Yeah. But what do I know? I mean,

[00:21:19] I wasn't around back then. So I don't know. It just seems that way. They thought it

[00:21:23] apparently right that I knew you were going to really makes me happy. I knew you were going

[00:21:27] to enjoy that. Yeah. I was very excited about that little portion for you.

[00:21:32] Like husband's going to sleep good tonight. Yeah. He was vindicated by a guard in the Bible.

[00:21:37] Right, right. Yeah. All right. Well, that was Jeremiah chapter 37. Sure as fuck was.

[00:21:43] Which means that assuming we're not sick again. Right. We will be back tomorrow with

[00:21:48] Jeremiah chapter 38 apologies for being off schedule. We're trying to catch up.

[00:21:53] Thank you and good night. Yeah. Bye.

[00:22:02] Hey wife, I guess that's the end. But husband, that's just sad. It doesn't have to be. We are on

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[00:22:11] For D's nuts. Oh my God. Stop doing that. Anyway, we're also on Facebook, Instagram,

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[00:24:58] face to face talk to each other about marriage, family, mental health or just anything that

[00:25:03] we want to know more about. Sometimes we have expert interviews, sometimes it's just us,

[00:25:07] but our goal is to bring some joy and laughter into your life every week. Our other goal is that

[00:25:11] maybe you will learn something as well. Right, so search the Holderness family podcast and

[00:25:15] check out our most recent episodes. We have one about staying organized with creators of the

[00:25:19] home edit and one about being diagnosed with ADHD as an adult. We hope you'll join us.

[00:25:25] ACAST helps creators launch, grow and monetize their podcasts everywhere. ACAST.com