Bible Study by Atheists: Leviticus Chapters 23 - 24

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[00:01:16] Hey you, welcome to sacrilegious discourse. I'm husband. I'm wife. And together we're reading the

[00:01:22] Bible. Starting with Genesis and eventually ending with Revelations, we're working through every book

[00:01:28] and offering our Etheus two cents. Or Shekels? Yeah, those. We're asking questions and pointing out

[00:01:35] all the nonsense. We aren't academics or scholars. Nope. In fact when it comes to religion

[00:01:40] we really don't know anything at all. What we've learned so far is that God's a dick. Oh he

[00:01:46] really is isn't he? If you're interested in how we've reached this startling conclusion maybe start from

[00:01:52] episode one. Otherwise jump in anywhere it's all good. Yep!

[00:02:08] Husband. Yeah wife. Hi. Hi. Do you remember what happened last time?

[00:02:15] No. Really? We just last night did the Q&A over it. I know but I wasn't prepared. I never

[00:02:23] prepared for these things and then so I'm not actually thinking about it like we just

[00:02:27] were doing other things just before this. So like I'm not ready to answer that question.

[00:02:32] It just sucks because like you always leave it up to me and like well I didn't look either so

[00:02:37] I don't know. But you do look generally. But I didn't. You didn't but then you must have known what

[00:02:42] we talked about. Well I mean we talked about divorce in our Q&A so yeah that's right it was just

[00:02:49] more rules and shit. That's right okay. I mean that's pretty much what Levele Kiss is. Yeah

[00:02:54] just more rules and shit. All right. And one of those was about divorce. Right. And

[00:03:03] don't be a whore or something? No that sounds about right. Don't be a prostitute and don't

[00:03:08] prostitute your daughter. God made kill you for some of that shit. Yeah but I can't remember

[00:03:12] which ones because they were arbitrary. So we're all fucked. Yeah. All right so today? Today

[00:03:17] we are reading Levele Kiss chapters 23 and 24. Okay see you in a second. That face is so ugly.

[00:03:26] Don't make that face at me. You turned your head again. Oh whatever. Okay. What is this Levele Kiss

[00:03:34] chapter? I was like what's the book called again? Yeah that one. Levele Kiss chapter 23, the

[00:03:40] appointed beasts. Yep yep. Okay. The Lord said to Moses give the following instructions to the

[00:03:48] people of Israel. Why is he only ever talked to Moses? Because. I mean that's selfish. I mean

[00:03:55] it's bullshit. Moses is special. He's his dude. Fuck Moses. Fuck Moses. Wow. That escalated quickly.

[00:04:03] You want to dark places there. Yeah. Okay. Okay. These are the Lord's appointed festivals.

[00:04:09] I like seeing festivals better than feasts says because it's easier because I have a hard time with words

[00:04:15] that end in festivals. Yeah. Like six. Right. Can't say it. What what am I saying? Like fourth,

[00:04:23] fifth and sixth. Fourth, fifth and sixth. I can't say that. Sixth of the. So I can't hear the word

[00:04:31] festivals without thinking of Adam Sandler. Festivists for the rest of us? No no that was

[00:04:36] sign. The eight crazy day or whatever this part of the song. Yeah. I don't know. Festivals lights

[00:04:41] yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That camera how it goes but it's in one of the songs. The Jewish melody

[00:04:46] that he sings. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So okay so the Lord has some calendar dates that he wants you to

[00:04:52] take down. Okay everybody get out there calendars. Everybody get out your calendar and your pen. Yeah.

[00:04:57] Which you are to proclaim as official days for Holy Assembly. Okay. Ready? I will proclaim.

[00:05:05] Proclaim that I can speak better next time. You're an idiot. You have six days each week for your

[00:05:12] ordinary work but the seventh day is a Sabbath day of complete rest. Boring. I just covered that one

[00:05:19] an official day for Holy Assembly. I thought you were supposed to. Oh that's for us. So yes. Well

[00:05:25] no now this is the first time you're actually saying like you got to go get together. Get to church.

[00:05:30] Yeah. It's got to go church. Bitches it is the Lord's Sabbath day and it must be observed wherever you

[00:05:36] live. Okay. Okay. In addition to the Sabbath these are the Lord's appointed festivals. The official days

[00:05:45] for Holy Assembly that are to be celebrated at the proper times each year. I have a question. Yeah.

[00:05:50] Do you think God sent Moses over to the Native Americans to let them know when these days would be

[00:05:55] no I don't think he did. Okay. I don't think that God knew that there was a North America over there

[00:06:01] on the other side of the continent because these are all directed just at those Israelites. Yeah.

[00:06:07] Okay. And it strikes me as wow that God sure didn't know very much about the planet he was

[00:06:12] reflecting. So he created the earth and everything on it but he only cared about these one people

[00:06:16] that couple of sections. Yeah. All right. He created the whole entire globe and then pin pointed

[00:06:24] this one little group on this one. And then now this one like one person Moses. Yeah. But if

[00:06:28] you ask Christians today they think that America is where Jesus was born and Merka. Merka.

[00:06:36] Yeah. The Lord's Passover begins at sundown on the 14th day of the first month. 14th day of

[00:06:44] the first month. Lord's Passover. January 14th. January 14th. That's when Passover starts. I

[00:06:48] guess that's I don't. I thought that was Easter. Yeah. I don't know. They rearranged it later. I

[00:06:54] think. Oh, okay. Because all the different churches. Wait. How do we remember? We covered this.

[00:06:59] Um, all the different churches had different dates and so um, there was like a council of

[00:07:04] churchy bosses that got together and said let's create one for Easter. Remember we did

[00:07:10] an Easter bonus. Well, maybe the calendars were different back then too. Yeah. Like maybe the

[00:07:14] first month was that was part of the problem is they all had different calendars and they all

[00:07:19] had different dates for these events. And so well, because there would have been the um, whatever

[00:07:23] the Greek calendar, whatever was the Roman calendar, rec then but there was a different calendar.

[00:07:29] There was an Arabic calendar too. And then you know, the east would have had their own calendar. So

[00:07:35] right. I don't know. Whatever. Lots of calendars floating around back then. Yeah.

[00:07:40] On the next day, the 15th day of the month, you must begin celebrating the festival of

[00:07:45] unleavened bread. Oh man. We always forget about the unleavened bread celebration.

[00:07:51] I love bread. But do you love unleavened bread? I would like to live near a bakery so I could

[00:07:56] smell it all the time. Wouldn't that be nice? Good wood. I made bread for a while. Yeah,

[00:08:03] you did. Whatever happened to that. It was good. And then you know what? You tried the last time

[00:08:08] you tried it. You sucked it up. I really did. It was so bad. You didn't read the directions that time.

[00:08:13] I didn't. Why? Because you are an arrogant ass. I thought I could do it. You thought you could do it.

[00:08:17] I could do it. Idiot. Yeah. Make some good bread next time read directions. I will. I will. Okay. When?

[00:08:24] I don't know. Are you going to make it unleavened? No. Okay. I'm just curious. I don't know. I'll make

[00:08:29] some Portuguese sweet bread. Well, only if you follow the directions. Right. Okay. This festival to

[00:08:35] the Lord continues for seven days. And during that time, the bread you eat must be made without yeast.

[00:08:41] That's what unleavened means. I think they cover that detail. So many times. Yeah. On the first day

[00:08:46] of the festival, all the people must stop their ordinary work and observe an official day for a

[00:08:51] holy assembly. Jews assemble. That was really tacky. And I apologize. I don't really feel

[00:09:03] that that was appropriate. And I am very sorry. Yeah, no, but it was so funny. It was funny,

[00:09:07] but it was offensive and sorry. Yeah. All right. It just popped out of my mouth. We're making

[00:09:12] in front of the Bible. We're not making front of people. I know. So I just don't ever want to hurt

[00:09:17] people's feelings. Like, I don't know. We do this fucking podcast about and we bash on the Bible

[00:09:23] all the whole time. You're like, I don't want to hurt people's feelings. I can have both of those ideas

[00:09:29] simultaneously. I contain multitudes for seven days. You must present special gifts to the Lord.

[00:09:36] Oh, and who will receive them? Do you think Moses and Aaron, for sure, sounds like on the seventh day,

[00:09:42] the people must again stop all their ordinary work to observe an official day for holy assembly.

[00:09:49] Okay. Did you already say that? Yeah. We already cover that. Okay. Then the Lord said to Moses,

[00:09:55] there's more. Yeah. Give the following instructions to the people of Israel when you enter the land,

[00:10:00] I am giving you and you harvest its first crops, bring the priest a bundle of grain from the first

[00:10:06] cutting of your grain harvest. Now wait a minute. I thought he said you're supposed to wait five

[00:10:12] years before you start plucking at that field. I thought that was on like a tree of some type.

[00:10:18] What? That was on some sort of tree. It was just for the trees. Yeah. There was something else. It

[00:10:23] wasn't for all of the farmlands. No, no, no, no. Just the trees. Yeah, because remember we were talking about

[00:10:28] how it would be too small at first for it to be harvested those first three years and that's why

[00:10:34] they waited till the fourth year to give that whole harvest to the Lord and then the fifth year,

[00:10:39] they got to get it for themselves. I don't know. It was a tree. Well, whatever. Some type. You

[00:10:46] still don't get your first harvest of grain either. Yeah. Everything goes to the Lord. Well,

[00:10:50] I said the first cutting. Yeah. So goes to the Lord. Yeah. Aka, Aaron and Moses. Right. On the day after

[00:10:57] the Sabbath, the priest will lift it up before the Lord so it may be accepted on your behalf.

[00:11:02] I wonder how that like how does the God reach down and take it? No. Oh. Moses and Aaron are accepting

[00:11:10] it on the Lord's behalf. Let's raise it up and then we're going to eat this later for dinner.

[00:11:15] We accept this great bounty on your behalf. Right. On that same day you must sacrifice a one-year-old

[00:11:22] male lamb with no defects as a burnt offering to the Lord, which again them boys will accept

[00:11:28] on the Lord's behalf. Right. Yep. With it you must present a grain offering consisting of four

[00:11:34] quarts of choice flour moistened with olive oil as always. Because it's probably the ingredients

[00:11:40] to some really good meal the back then. You know, like everything was a dead animal with

[00:11:47] unleavened bread and flour and olive oil. Yeah. Or I always say all yeah olive oil not vegetable oil

[00:11:54] olive oil shut up cook and I oil what yeah it will be a special gift of pleasing a Roma to the Lord.

[00:12:04] Yeah, I bet it was starving ass people. You must also offer one quart of wine as a liquid offering.

[00:12:12] Of course. You know, you're going to have something to wash that shit down with.

[00:12:15] When you are thinking of this in context of who's actually getting to celebrate and enjoy it. Right.

[00:12:20] It's bullshit. This is so nasty. It's bullshit. Do not eat any bread or roasted green or fresh

[00:12:27] kernels on that day until you bring this offering to your God. This is a permanent law for you

[00:12:36] and it must be observed from generation to generation wherever you live. I have never seen my parents

[00:12:43] of devout Christians bring any of this stuff to the Lord ever. Well, remember the New Testament

[00:12:51] apparently wipes all this shit away. But I'm sorry my parents said that they obey every single word

[00:12:58] they take it as literal and that is where the no homo stature comes from and if they are going to do

[00:13:06] that then why are they not taking these things to the gods? Why aren't they getting? Well, we've

[00:13:13] talked about it before and they pick and choose what they want. That's right because they're

[00:13:17] hypocritical. I just wanted to specifically have that pointed out again because I've never seen any

[00:13:22] Christian do this. Right. Okay, from the day after the Sabbath the day you bring the bundle of grain

[00:13:29] to be lifted up as a special countering I'm sorry a special offering. Sorry count off seven full

[00:13:35] weeks keep counting until the day after the seventh Sabbath 50 days later. Okay. Then present an

[00:13:44] offering of new grain to the Lord because they probably ran out at that point. Yeah, I mean

[00:13:49] yeah that makes sense. You got to keep them, you got to keep food for them. Yeah, yeah. Because

[00:13:54] they're really hungry. That's probably why they killed those other two for burning the wrong

[00:14:01] wood. They had too many sons. Yeah, yeah. We can't be them all on this amount so yeah, we've got to

[00:14:06] get rid of a couple which which of your sons are the doucheers from wherever you live bring two

[00:14:13] loaves of bread to be lifted up before the Lord as a special offering. Make these loaves from four

[00:14:19] quarts of choice flour and bake them with yeast with yeast. Oh, this will be an offering to the Lord

[00:14:25] from the first of your crops along with the bread present seven one year old male lambs with no

[00:14:32] defects one young bull and two rams as burnt offerings to the Lord. That's a lot of shit. This is

[00:14:39] very specific too. And that's a lot though. Somebody is enjoying this meal. Well, okay if you're poor

[00:14:47] remember how they would let you do birds and stuff so they're basically this must be just the rich

[00:14:52] that are getting taxed right? I would hope. Let's just be honest. This is a fucking tax. Yeah, it's

[00:14:58] God tax but it's tax. Well, and it's a God tax that the boys are eating. Yeah, yeah. These

[00:15:05] burnt offerings together with the grain offerings and liquid offerings will be a special gift. A pleasing

[00:15:11] aroma to the Lord or a special alright? Then you must offer one male goat as a sin offering and two

[00:15:17] one year old male lambs as a peace offering. The priest will lift up the two lambs as special

[00:15:23] offering to the Lord together with the loaves representing the first of your crops. These offerings

[00:15:28] which are holy to the Lord belong to the priests. Preists. Yep see told you. Oh yeah, I mean obviously

[00:15:36] that we already talked about this is a racket. It's so it's such a gift. Yeah. That same day will be

[00:15:42] proclaimed an official day for holy assembly holy holy assembly a day on which you do no ordinary

[00:15:50] work. This is thank God I don't have to do ordinary work. Yeah, just specialty serve the

[00:15:56] Aaron and Moses. Yeah, I just got to drag them on my fucking animals and my grain and give it

[00:16:01] to them. That's all that work. Yeah, that works okay. Yeah, this is a permanent law for you and it

[00:16:06] must be observed from generation to generation wherever you live when you harvest the crops of your

[00:16:10] land do not harvest the grain along the edges of your fields and do not pick up with the harvesters

[00:16:15] drop leave it for the poor and the foreigners living among you. Guess what? I am the Lord your God.

[00:16:23] It's never not funny. It's really not. The Lord said to Moses give the following instructions

[00:16:29] to the people of Israel on the first day of the appointment month in early autumn you are to observe

[00:16:37] a day of complete rest. It will be an official day for holy assembly. To me rest and assembly

[00:16:44] do not go together. Oh, I agree. Yes. Rest means you stay your ass home on your couch. Not you get

[00:16:50] dressed up put your makeup and shoes on and go mix with the other people in your neighborhood.

[00:16:55] I can attest to the fact that staying home on Sundays is so much better than going to a church.

[00:16:59] Yeah, so much. Sometimes oh I hope nobody I love here's this but sometimes staying home on a

[00:17:06] Sunday is better than a family get together. Ooh, I mean I know you're not supposed to say that

[00:17:12] but for me I have social anxiety and it is real and I would much rather stay home. Right.

[00:17:19] When we talk about rest assembly is not part of that. Got it. Okay, it will be an official

[00:17:25] official day for holy assembly a day commemorated with loud blasts of a trumpet. Yeah, no,

[00:17:32] that's not for me. That's fireworks. Bum bum bum bum bum. Wow, that was so bad. It really was. You

[00:17:40] must do no ordinary work on that day. Instead you are to present special gifts to the Lord.

[00:17:46] Then the Lord said to Moses, be careful to celebrate the day of Atomin on the 10th day of that same

[00:17:51] month. Nine days after the festival of trumpets you must observe it as an official day for holy

[00:17:58] assembly a day to deny yourselves and present special gifts to the Lord. Do no work during that

[00:18:05] entire day because it is the day of Atomin, capital letters, day of Atomin. So they've got all this

[00:18:14] time that they have to take off and don't do ordinary work right. And they've got all this shit

[00:18:19] they got to bring to the priests so they must work their asses off between them to get all the

[00:18:23] shit together. So they never have day of rest. They have to give them a lot of stuff. Yeah,

[00:18:27] they don't ever have days of rest that are actually restful. Right. Kind of like. And then they got

[00:18:32] a sit there and watch the fucking priest eat their food. Yeah, yeah. Day of Atomin when offerings

[00:18:37] of purification are made for you making you right with the Lord your God all who do not deny themselves

[00:18:44] that day will be cut off from God's people. We see you doing work. You are out. Yeah, totally.

[00:18:50] I will destroy anyone to destroy anyone among you who does any work on that day. Jesus. That

[00:18:57] escalated quickly. Right. You must not do any work at all exclamation point. You must not do any

[00:19:04] work at all set for bringing stuff to the priests. So and going to assembly and participating in that

[00:19:10] because somebody's got to play that horn. Yeah, that's work right? Yeah. Okay. So like I want to

[00:19:16] know the definitions exactly because there's work being done just a matter of what kind of work is

[00:19:22] being done. Yeah, this is not relaxing. No, very stressful. Yeah. This is a permanent law for you

[00:19:28] and it must be observed from generation to generation wherever you live. This will be a Sabbath day

[00:19:33] of complete rest for you. Yeah. And on that day, you must deny yourselves. He keeps saying deny

[00:19:40] yourselves and I can't help but feeling that that's like a meaning like and also don't have the sex.

[00:19:47] I'm cute. Why don't we look that up in our Q and A? Because I that's what you mean by deny yourself, right?

[00:19:52] This day of rest will begin at sundown on the ninth day of the month and extend until Sunday on the

[00:19:57] 10th day. And the Lord said to Moses, oh my god, this section keeps going on and on. I see that it'll

[00:20:03] never end. It looks like yeah. It's never going to end ever. It's never going to end. So we should

[00:20:07] just, you know, keep going and get through it. Okay. Instead of stopping and winding them out how long

[00:20:12] I just wanted to point out that it's boring and I hate it. Well, I think we point out how boring the

[00:20:16] Bible, the Bible is the Bible is pretty much every time. Boring bobble head. Yeah. And the Lord said

[00:20:23] to Moses, give the following instructions to the people of Israel, you know, like you've been doing.

[00:20:27] Yeah. Begin celebrating the festival of shelters. Shelters. Shelters. Okay. Like sheltered from the wind.

[00:20:34] Yeah. On the 15th day of the appointed month, five days after the day of atonement. This festival

[00:20:40] to the Lord will last for seven days. On the first day of the festival, you must proclaim an official

[00:20:45] day for holy assembly when you do no ordinary work for seven days. You must present special gifts

[00:20:51] to the Lord that each day is another holy day on which you present your special gifts to the Lord.

[00:20:57] This will be a solemn occasion and no ordinary work maybe done that day. These are the

[00:21:02] Lord's appointed festival. Celebrate them each year as an official holiday. No, start over. Celebrate

[00:21:09] them each year as official days for holy assembly by presenting special gifts to the Lord.

[00:21:15] Burn offerings, green offerings, sacrifices and liquid offerings each on its proper day. These

[00:21:21] festivals must be observed in addition to the Lord's regular Sabbath days and the offerings are

[00:21:26] in addition to your personal gifts. The offerings you give to fulfill your vows and the voluntary

[00:21:33] offerings you present to the Lord. Don't forget your volunteer work, boys. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:21:40] Remember that this seven-day festival to the Lord, the festival of shelters begins on the 15th day

[00:21:46] of the appointed month after you have harvested all the produce of the land. The first day and the

[00:21:52] eighth day of the festival will be days of complete rest. Okay. On the first day, gather branches from

[00:21:58] magnificent trees. Magnificent trees, huh? Magnificent trees. What constitutes a magnificent tree,

[00:22:05] I wonder? A tree? That is a magnificent tree. I mean that's merely a okay. If you look at a tree

[00:22:12] and you're like holy shit, then that is a magnificent tree. That tree's a motherfucker.

[00:22:19] I don't know what that means. I know what it means either. I mean, I don't know. It's a tree

[00:22:27] that nobody has peed on. I don't know what to imagine. Remember early on you were always talking about

[00:22:32] pee, getting drunk and peeing on the tabernacle. And I would tell you why do you have to pee on the

[00:22:37] tabernacle? Go pee on the trees. Right. But not the magnificent ones it turns out. Don't pee on the

[00:22:42] magnificent trees. Magnificent trees. Yeah, there's an non-peed on trees. Yeah.

[00:22:46] Yeah. pee on neither the tabernacle nor the magnificent trees. Right. I am the Lord, your God.

[00:22:56] Palm fronds, bows from leafy trees and willows that grow by the streams. Oh those are the

[00:23:01] magnificent things. Okay. Let me just say that again. Yeah. Palm fronds, bows. Palm fronds? What the hell is that?

[00:23:08] You don't know what palm fronds are? No. Okay, have you ever seen a palm tree? Yeah. Okay, so you

[00:23:12] know those weird like the leafy things that are just the strands. Sure. Those are fronds.

[00:23:18] Oh, okay. Palm fronds. Right. Yeah, because they don't really have leafs like you might think of a tree

[00:23:26] kind of like a fir tree. They don't have leafs per se. They have those sticky things. Yeah. So

[00:23:33] palm fronds. God. Those things. Okay, bows from leafy trees and willows that grow by the streams.

[00:23:41] Then celebrate with joy before the Lord your God for seven days. How do you know what palm fronds

[00:23:46] are? Because I don't. That's so weird to me. You lived in Florida for a while, which I'm sorry

[00:23:52] for that, but you did. I did. I did. You're right. But I feel like I knew it before I went to Florida.

[00:23:57] You also lived in Hawaii. But I feel like I knew it before then too. So I don't know. Okay, sorry.

[00:24:05] I feel like if I asked my child, child, do you know what palm fronds are? Yes.

[00:24:11] Did you know prior to this conversation? I knew prior to my vacation to Florida. See?

[00:24:19] Years ago. Okay, so I suck. You basically are a dumbass and child knows more than you. Okay. So

[00:24:26] just saying right. That's not saying a lot because child is brilliant and you are super dumb.

[00:24:35] You must observe this festival to the Lord for seven days every year. This is a permanent law for

[00:24:40] you and it must be observed in the appointed month from generation to generation. Okay,

[00:24:45] for seven days, you must live outside in little shelters. What the fuck?

[00:24:52] Mr. Cardboard boxes kids. I did not see that coming. We got a little pup tent.

[00:24:58] All Native Gorn Israelites must live in shelters. Must. They must. This will remind each new

[00:25:06] generation of Israelites that I made their ancestors live in shelters when I rescued them from the land of Egypt.

[00:25:14] That's horrible. You need to stop. No, because he's always going, I saved your asses. Nanny, nanny,

[00:25:20] boob, but don't forget. Yeah, he's always doing that. I know. He's he's and then he texts on what does

[00:25:26] he say? I am the Lord, your God. Fuck yeah, he does. That's exactly the next words. So Moses gave

[00:25:32] the Israelites these instructions regarding the annual festivals of the Lord the end. That was a long

[00:25:38] chapter. That was a fuck ton of boring non-holidays. It really was. None of those maybe want to celebrate.

[00:25:46] Not at all. But you know what that's a lot of celebrating though. Not really. I mean, it seemed like

[00:25:51] it didn't seem very joyous. Well yeah, no. Okay, that's what I'm saying. Like you're saying that was

[00:25:55] a lot of days that they called celebration that we're lacking thereof. Right, right? Okay. Well,

[00:26:01] you know what I want to celebrate? What? That we're at the end of this fucking section and next is

[00:26:06] Leviticus chapter 24. See you guys soon. Okay, Leviticus chapter 24 moving on. I think we kind

[00:26:17] of scan this is a little shorter. Yeah, this one is shorter. Yay. Yay. Okay, so this one has three

[00:26:23] little sections. The first little section is called the tending of the lamp. Okay, lamp. The lamp.

[00:26:30] Okay, they talk about lambs. So I want to make sure it wasn't a lamb, but it's a lamp. It's a lamp.

[00:26:36] Lamp lamp lamp. Okay, popped my pee. Got it for you. Got it. The Lord said to Moses,

[00:26:43] command the people of Israel to bring you pure oil of pressed olives for the light to keep the

[00:26:48] lamps burning continually. Yes, that's very important. This is the lamp stand that stands in the

[00:26:54] tabernacle in front of the inner curtain that shields the arc of the covenant. Yeah, Aaron must

[00:27:02] keep the lamps burning in the Lord's presence all night. See his job is really hard. He deserves

[00:27:06] all that shit. Whatever, yeah, this is a permanent law for you and it must be observed from

[00:27:10] generation to generation. Aaron and the priest must tend the lamps on the pure gold lamp stand

[00:27:16] continually in the Lord's presence. Okay? Okay, so there's that. And the next one is the show bread.

[00:27:23] The show bread? Yeah, like if you are going to like a county fair and there's like show

[00:27:31] animals. Okay, this is the show bread. You're sure about that? No, but I'm guessing

[00:27:38] that's what it sounds like to me. Okay, all right, let's find out. Okay, you must bake 12 flat

[00:27:43] loaves of bread from choice flour using four quarts of flour for each loaf. Place the bread before

[00:27:50] the Lord on the pure gold table and arrange the loaves in two stacks with six loaves in each stack.

[00:27:58] Put some pure frankincense near each stack to serve as a representative offering. A special gift

[00:28:05] presented to the Lord. I don't know what that means. Yeah, I'm okay. It looks like you're displaying

[00:28:11] your breads to as the Lord and they're going hmmm and but Aaron is going I think we'll take

[00:28:20] that one. Yeah, yeah, best and show. That's gotta be what's happening. The show bread, best and show.

[00:28:25] Okay, every Sabbath day this bread must be laid out before the Lord as a gift from the Israelites.

[00:28:31] It is an ongoing expression of the eternal covenant. The loaves of bread will belong to Aaron and

[00:28:38] his descendants who must eat them in a sacred place for they are most holy. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:28:45] They're most free. They are most grift. Yeah, it is the permanent right of the priest to claim this

[00:28:52] portion of the special gifts presented to the Lord. Okay, the last little section here ready? Yeah,

[00:28:59] the punishment for blasphemy. Oh man, this one applies to us directly. I know. Fuck. Okay. God damn it.

[00:29:09] When I was a kid and before my dad was all saved in whatever yeah, he would say God damn it to

[00:29:14] help his fuck shit when he cussed and it was the best. Just try it. Seeing it. God damn it to help his

[00:29:22] fuck shit. Yeah, yeah, it feels good. I know. It feels right off the tongue. Yeah, one day a man who

[00:29:27] had an Israelite mother and an Egyptian father came out of his tent and got into a fight with one

[00:29:32] of the Israelite men. This is like a once upon a time. Right? Once upon a time a dude came out and

[00:29:37] got in a fight. Right. Yeah, during this fight, the son of an Israelite woman blasphemed the name of

[00:29:42] the Lord with a curse. God damn it. I'm imagining that's what he sounded like. Okay, so the man was

[00:29:50] brought to Moses for judgment. Moses this guy said, God damn it. Wait, the guy was I you sure

[00:29:58] wasn't a person that blasphemed? That was brought to judgment because yeah, why would you? The man

[00:30:03] the man that cursed was brought to Moses for judgment. All right, so yeah, so the little fucking

[00:30:08] snitch that got cursed out. Oh, he was telling he was tattling and he goes, Moses this guy said,

[00:30:14] God damn it out. Me. Got it. His mother was Sheila miss or something thereof. Sure. The daughter of

[00:30:21] debris and debris detritus of the tribe of Dan. Oh, there's the tribe of Dan again. There's Dan

[00:30:30] the man. Dan they we forgot about them. Yeah, there's some cussers and fixers.

[00:30:37] Why I mean, they're the tribe of Dan. I know. So they're the fixers. They're the cussers. They're the old

[00:30:43] mother fuckers. They kept the man in custody until the Lord's will and the matter should become

[00:30:50] clear to them. Then the Lord said to Moses, oh, I'm shuddering. I'm expecting death here. Right?

[00:30:57] Yeah. I mean, other dudes burned the wrong wood. I know right. God damn it. I know, right. Take

[00:31:02] the blasphemer outside the camp until all those who heard the curse to lay their hands on his head.

[00:31:09] Then oh, let the entire community stone him to death. Jesus Christ.

[00:31:15] This was not a cool place to live. No, it was not. This is the cult you do not want to live in.

[00:31:21] So they literally are supposed to drag us out of our house and stone us today. Yeah. I mean,

[00:31:25] according to this religious text. Yeah. Okay. Oh, scary. Right? I mean, just think of like some

[00:31:32] nut bag actually took all this seriously. Like he would feel completely justified in taking us outside

[00:31:40] and stoning us to death and totally say like what? I'm just following the rules. You could

[00:31:47] arrest me, but I answer to a higher law. Doesn't Jesus eventually say something about like those without

[00:31:52] sin cast the first down? That's what he's referring to. So you're telling me all these fuckers are

[00:31:58] without sin, huh? Yeah. Well, they haven't been told that. Yeah. Okay. But but you know, Jesus is

[00:32:05] supposedly God or at least God's son, whatever something at the very least he's a prophet because

[00:32:13] that's what the Jewish belief of him. Sure. Yeah. And whatever bunch of bunch of shit. It's a bunch of

[00:32:19] say to the people of Israel, those who curse their God will be punished for their sin. Okay,

[00:32:24] this is not punishment. Punishment is where you actually get to feel the punishment and like

[00:32:31] you sit and think about what you get to rectify your place, right? Yes. You sit and think about

[00:32:36] what you did. Motherfucker. Like no, killing somebody they aren't being punished. They're being murdered.

[00:32:42] Right. Anyone who blasphemes the name of the Lord must be stoned to death by the whole community

[00:32:47] of Israel. Wait a minute. I thought it was just the ones who hurt them now. It's the whole

[00:32:51] fucking community. Wow. Any native foreign Israelite or foreigner among you who blasphemes the name

[00:32:58] of the Lord must be put to death. Damn. This God is ugly. God is what really is anyone who takes another

[00:33:06] person's life must be put to death. Anyone who kills another wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,

[00:33:11] he's literally telling them to take someone's life. But then those people also should like

[00:33:17] literally they should all die. Yeah, everybody die. They're doing the thing that would make them

[00:33:22] be put to death by killing the person if you're doing it in God's name is perfectly grand. I guess.

[00:33:28] Yeah. Anyone who kills another person's animal must pay for it in full a live animal for the

[00:33:34] animal that was killed. Anyone who injures another person must be dealt with according to the injury

[00:33:39] inflicted. Oh, here we go. Ready? A fracture for a fracture. Oh, I for an eye. Oh,

[00:33:47] a tooth for a two. So like the punishment was literally you broke my arm. I'm breaking your

[00:33:52] fucking arm. Yeah. That is childish to say the least. Whatever anyone does to injure another person

[00:33:59] must be paid back in kind childish. Whoever kills an animal must pay for it in full. But whoever kills

[00:34:06] another person must be put to death. Oh, well, yeah, unless it's a slave, unless it's a slave in which

[00:34:12] case they aren't human anyway. Right. And if it's a girl who fucking cares their nasty skin co-bags,

[00:34:19] this same standard applies both to need of foreign Israelites and to the foreigners living

[00:34:23] among you. I am the Lord your God. After Moses gave all these instructions to the Israelites,

[00:34:28] they took the blasphemer outside the camp and stoned him to death such nice people. The Israelites did

[00:34:34] just as the Lord had commanded Moses. The end. I totally want to join this clan. It sounds

[00:34:40] such a great place to live. Now you get to stone people, man. I get to be raped all the time and

[00:34:45] awesome. And I get to be raped all the time and we get to give them all of our shit. And I get

[00:34:51] to be raped all the time. Yeah, that too. Yeah. Wow. Wow. Okay, that's all the enthusiasm I can

[00:34:58] pretend. Yeah, we'll see you guys some other time. Yeah, um, we'll see you Tuesday for Q&A

[00:35:05] and you have till Sunday, five Eastern to get your questions in. And then after that, we'll see

[00:35:11] you on Thursday for Leviticus chapters 25 and 26. Bye.

[00:35:15] Yeah, wife. Um, it's the end so we should say all the things. We definitely should say all

[00:35:31] the things. What thing should we say? So we want people to get a hold of us and there's ways that

[00:35:37] they can do that. So one of those ways I know is email. What's that email address? sacrilegious

[00:35:43] discourse at gmail.com and they should do that by five Eastern on Sundays if they want their

[00:35:51] question to be included in our new Tuesday Q&A episodes every week. Yeah, I'm really looking forward

[00:35:58] to hearing from some of our fans for sure. Yeah, they can also get a hold of us on social media.

[00:36:03] And we have Twitter, Instagram, Facebook and Pinterest. Um, probably the easiest way would be

[00:36:10] through Twitter at sacrilegious underscore d for d's not still. Yes, still. Still. I guess or dumb

[00:36:17] dumb or do do yeah, wherever you want to go with that, I guess right, right? Okay. Um, yeah, so we have

[00:36:23] all those things and they should go there. Yeah, they should okay. And then also what else should they do?

[00:36:29] They should like, you know, review us on Apple podcasts because that really, really helps us out.

[00:36:34] And, you know, if you are on any other podcast and have just like hit a heart or a like thing or something.

[00:36:40] A thumbs up. Whatever the hell it is, just do it. Okay. Just do it. All right. I think that's all we got.

[00:36:46] Oh, you know what? I have one more thing. Oh, she's got one more thing. Um, thank you so much guys

[00:36:50] for listening and choosing us to spend your time with. We really appreciate you all and

[00:36:55] you're definitely top shelf. Yeah, honestly, it makes a smile just about every day. Yep.