Are you ready to rumble through the ancient dust of Babylon and the not-so-prophetic postal service of Jeremiah's day? Buckle up, dear skeptics and scripture sleuths, for a no-holds-barred Q&A session where we dissect Jeremiah chapters 26 - 30 with the precision of a Chaldean astronomer cutting through astrological nonsense. This episode of Sacrilegious Discourse is your irreverent guide to the biblical equivalent of an ancient soap opera, complete with false prophets, divine DMs, and political intrigue.
Our dynamic duo of godless gabbers doesn't just answer your burning questions; they set the parchment on fire with their snarky insights. Was Jeremiah the ancient world's version of a chain letter writer? Did Babylon have a better postal system than we do today? And most importantly, why the heck did false prophets in Babylon have a fanbase? We're laying it all out on the clay tablet for your entertainment.
Join us as we tear apart the claim that Jeremiah was anything more than a doomsday pen pal in a time of Babylonian Big Brother. We'll explore the 'Babylonian Chronicles,' a collection of clay tablets that spill the Tigris tea on what was really going down in the Neo-Babylonian Empire. It's a tale of celestial scribes, political power plays, and a king who basically invented the delete button for history.
So, if you're looking for a podcast that irreverently questions every 'thou shalt' and 'thus saith the Lord,' you've found your promised land. Forget sacred scrolls and holy proclamations; we're all about the historical receipts and divine deflation. And yes, we might even talk about the actual Bible verses... when we're not marveling at the ancient world's version of a Silicon Valley tech giant (Spoiler alert: it's Babylon!).
Subscribe, leave a blasphemous comment, and share this episode with all your heathen friends. Because let's face it, who needs prophecy when you've got historians, archaeologists, and a couple of snarky podcasters to tell you how it really was? Are you ready to rumble through the ancient dust of Babylon and the not-so-prophetic postal service of Jeremiah's day? Buckle up, dear skeptics and scripture sleuths, for a no-holds-barred Q&A session where we dissect Jeremiah chapters 26 - 30 with the precision of a Chaldean astronomer cutting through astrological nonsense. This episode of Sacrilegious Discourse is your irreverent guide to the biblical equivalent of an ancient soap opera, complete with false prophets, divine DMs, and political intrigue.
Was Jeremiah the ancient world's version of a chain letter writer? Did Babylon have a better postal system than we do today? And most importantly, why the heck did false prophets in Babylon have a fanbase? We're laying it all out on the clay tablet for your entertainment.
We'll explore the 'Babylonian Chronicles,' a collection of clay tablets that spill the Tigris tea on what was really going down in the Neo-Babylonian Empire. It's a tale of celestial scribes, political power plays, and a king who basically invented the delete button for history.
So, if you're looking for a podcast that irreverently questions every 'thou shalt' and 'thus saith the Lord,' you've found your promised land. Forget sacred scrolls and holy proclamations; we're all about the historical receipts and divine deflation. And yes, we might even talk about the actual Bible verses... when we're not marveling at the ancient world's version of a Silicon Valley tech giant (Spoiler alert: it's Babylon!).
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[00:00:00] Hey everyone, Husband here. And I'm wife. If you've been listening to us then you know
[00:00:08] we're all about reading the Bible and reacting to it on our first read through.
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[00:01:16] Welcome to sacrilegious discourse. I'm husband and I'm wife. Together we're reading the Bible
[00:01:20] for the very first time. We grew up without religion and wanted to know what all the fuss was about.
[00:01:26] Well, what did we learn so far? That God is a dick and apparently some people believe in talking
[00:01:31] donkeys. We're not trying to pass ourselves off as experts. Nope, we're just reading the Bible for the
[00:01:36] first time and giving our first take reaction. If you'd like to join us in this venture you might
[00:01:40] consider starting at episode one. Otherwise jump in wherever you like. All right let's go read the Bible.
[00:01:46] Yeah let's get to it. Husband!
[00:01:51] wife um do you know today is today is Saturday yeah it's Q and a Saturday that's right and what are
[00:02:00] we queuing in A and today? Well technically we're covering chapters 26 through 30 of Jeremiah.
[00:02:08] Technically technically that's the section that we just finished. Sure sure that's not fully we're
[00:02:15] talking about an offshoot of that like something that was mentioned in in my notes. Okay
[00:02:20] that I was curious about wanted to like learn more about. Got it so it's not it's not that it's not
[00:02:28] but that's the stuff we're covering sort of. It's a question I had in my notes about those chapters.
[00:02:36] All right sounds good you ready to get into this? I am! Let's do this. Okie dokie.
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[00:04:25] Okay so I'm gonna talk to you today about some tablets tablets huh yeah like iPads and Samsung tablets
[00:04:32] totally totally what I'm gonna talk about no no okay so do you remember in chapter 29 when that
[00:04:41] was about Jeremiah Wright and some letters right yeah yeah he wrote letters to them over there in
[00:04:47] Babylon that had been taken away yeah and then he wrote some letters to the people at home being like
[00:04:54] I know about what you said yeah yeah so I wondered at the time like he so he just wrote a letter
[00:05:02] huh he just wrote letters right right and we kind of like glossed over it like okay I guess he wrote
[00:05:07] letters yeah but here's the thing diplomatic correspondence between overlords and vassals that was
[00:05:14] totally common back then in the second one MBC okay they just sent letters to each other okay whatever
[00:05:22] another example would be letters written from Palestine to the Pharaoh like we found some of those
[00:05:28] apparently and just what that's just what they did okay yeah so they did that okay they wrote letters
[00:05:34] they wrote letters got it yeah yeah and moreover the letters that he wrote remember at the time we were
[00:05:42] like oh I wonder if there were naysayers over in Babylon too like if there were false prophets there
[00:05:47] amongst the people that had been kidnapped and let away right there were okay they're totally
[00:05:53] got it so not everybody in Babylon was good right like not all the best and brightest also some of
[00:05:59] the scumiest and most lyre faced right okay yeah so that was a lie in the Bible just so you know okay
[00:06:06] yeah there were false prophets there so that's what he was being like I know there's some folks
[00:06:10] over there telling you that y'all about to come home tomorrow or whatever but they're lying and
[00:06:15] y'all there for a lifetime sorry got it yeah so here's the thing there was a lot of like unrest and
[00:06:23] stuff going on around that time yeah and we had talked about how the various little nations how they
[00:06:29] felt kind of like maybe now's the time to attack Babylon right right we see cracks in the facade
[00:06:34] right sure and there was the whole they had a discussion that's what when Isaiah stopped
[00:06:39] outside of the palace or whatever Jeremiah yeah Jesus when he stopped outside that that's what
[00:06:45] they had come to talk to the king about yeah whatever they were trying to figure out a way to maybe
[00:06:50] stop Babylon to plot against Babylon yeah yeah yeah so there was definitely unrest okay in
[00:06:57] in the area at the time yeah okay and both Jewish prophets and Jerusalem and Babylon as I said
[00:07:04] they were predicting the end of the exile soon maybe like it's bound to happen every any day now
[00:07:10] yeah because they all knew that shit was on shaky ground right okay yeah so there is a hint of the chaos
[00:07:17] that was happening in what's called the Babylonian chronicles and my ears perked up and I was like
[00:07:23] I'm sorry excuse me what Babylonian Chronicles sounds like a fucking comic book series I need to read
[00:07:30] that right so what are the Babylonian Chronicles I was my question they chronicle they chronicle the
[00:07:38] battle yeah yeah yeah there are a collection of around 45 clay tablets so not oh they didn't
[00:07:45] use like papyrus or anything like that they were clay tap tablets written in cuneiform okay okay
[00:07:52] yeah and I was like I must know about these I want to know everything about them what are they
[00:07:58] where are they yeah what what is going on with them guys sure okay the chronicles provide a large
[00:08:04] portion of what we know today of current Babylonian history okay yeah and they are considered the
[00:08:11] most reliable of ancient official records which I just find astounding yeah and these texts are largely
[00:08:19] about the neo Babylonian empire which are great interest of course to biblical scholars right for
[00:08:26] its historical involvement with the kingdom of Judah got it so it's this outside source that kind
[00:08:33] of validates some of the history that was happening sure the the politics obviously not the
[00:08:39] religiously prophet shit right right you know just the normal stuff yeah okay um they were composed by
[00:08:47] Babylonian astronomers known as chaldeans oh yeah I was like oh I didn't know that
[00:08:56] that's what the chaldeans were right yeah yeah they were they were a tribe outside of Babylon
[00:09:04] that got sucked into Babylon but they were um astrologers I see
[00:09:09] so are astronomers sorry right and so um they were very wise people okay that Babylon just kind of
[00:09:18] sucked into their group yeah they were like you're with us now got it they were like okay
[00:09:23] because there weren't a lot of them and you know yeah and as we saw the people that Babylon kind of
[00:09:29] sucked into their hold mm-hmm they were granted a fair amount of freedom I mean let's talk about how
[00:09:36] Jeremiah is telling the Babylonian exiled people go ahead and take land farm lands they
[00:09:43] marry have children yeah sounds like I mean kind of even based on the Bible it sounded like they were
[00:09:48] collecting like the best and brightest right exactly and so not only were they collecting the best
[00:09:54] and brightest for their own communities right they were also granting those people a large
[00:10:01] amount of freedom within their capture right so they were like well the bad news is you have to
[00:10:07] stay here forever the good news is we don't suck completely and all all of your peers are here
[00:10:13] and you know it's kind of cool right so it would be kind of like if Google went around and like
[00:10:19] kidnapped scientists and and um like IT people and just like all the smarty smarts yeah
[00:10:28] and locked them into the building but paid him really well and like yeah lots of food that they
[00:10:33] wanted which I kind of hear is how Google is right right so imagine that Babylon is kind of Google
[00:10:41] okay like the bad news is you work 24 seven now and you're always on call but the good news is
[00:10:47] got lots of benefits and lots and lots of perks and you're surrounded by bright people sure
[00:10:54] you know I mean that that means it didn't all suck right you know it's kind of important I think
[00:11:01] yeah because when you think about being kidnapped you and we were led to believe kind of that
[00:11:06] they were led away into slavery and that's right right like those are heavy words right and they just
[00:11:12] kind of weren't got it so that's kind of important to it is still a cage but is definitely a gilded
[00:11:19] cage I'm sure they probably reserve the right to enslave certain people I'm sure they did
[00:11:23] and I'm sure especially lower class and something like that but I'm sure that happened yeah or if
[00:11:27] you didn't contribute something to their society or whatever yeah exactly it's just this kind of
[00:11:32] paints the Babylonians in a little bit of a different light yeah and I'm not saying that going
[00:11:36] around kidnapping people is good I'm absolutely not saying that at all yeah but it is interesting how
[00:11:42] they went about strengthening their own kingdom while simultaneously cutting off surrounding
[00:11:50] kingdoms at the knees right that's interesting to me yeah okay so the tablets were composed by
[00:11:57] Babylonian astronomers known as Chaldeans and these tablets recorded major historical events
[00:12:04] likely drawing from even more detailed astronomical diaries I'm sorry what we'll get into that in a
[00:12:12] minute all right okay so hold that note because I was like there are diaries about astronomy I'm
[00:12:19] sorry hello what right and there were some okay all right so the tablets were uncovered the
[00:12:25] the ones that we're talking about the Babylonian ones yeah they were uncovered during 19th century
[00:12:29] excavations in Babylon so the 1800s okay they were left undecided in the archives for literal decades
[00:12:39] they found them and then just put them in a museum and were like someday I guess whatever I mean
[00:12:43] that happens to a lot of archaeological finds they don't know what to do with them so they they
[00:12:48] catalog until somebody does come along and actually it seems really cool what is it I have no idea
[00:12:54] right well means you gotta think somebody's gotta go through all these things that people find
[00:12:57] and so who does that and it's gotta be an expert right so how many experts are there in the world
[00:13:01] about you know I don't know how to read those tablets Babylon and find out that apparently that's
[00:13:06] where they all are right so the first chronicle to be published ever was in 1887 okay so
[00:13:13] finally the same decade that they found them somebody came along and was like sure hey I got this
[00:13:18] and then came the next one which was about the fall of ninn it's called the fall of ninn of a
[00:13:25] chronicle okay so and that one came out in 1923 got it so no wonder the 1900s right but these are
[00:13:33] finally yeah I think all but three the source that I was reading said have been what's called
[00:13:42] problem given provenance meaning we've been able to verify the date and history and all of
[00:13:49] that stuff so all but three of the 45 have been provenance which again that's so cool yeah yeah
[00:13:58] so these tablets cover Babylonian history within the year 747 to 668 BC okay yeah that would have
[00:14:07] been right around the time frame that we're talking about sure um they start with king nebunessa
[00:14:15] not nebukinessa right right nebunessa who ruled Babylon from 747 to 734 BC okay and they go all
[00:14:25] the way through to a period called the parthian period or the parthian empire okay and that was
[00:14:31] a major Iranian political and cultural power in ancient Iran from 247 BC to 224 AD okay so
[00:14:45] this these tablets cover all the way into an ad period got it that's amazing I thought you said
[00:14:52] that they only covered to this okay I misunderstood what you said at first because you said something
[00:14:57] about the 700s to 600s they cover okay hold on how did that work he's how does cover Babylonian history
[00:15:05] from king um okay so there's some history within the time period 747 to 668 BC yeah that's when it
[00:15:14] starts okay so cover some history in that period and then from there all the way through yeah
[00:15:20] sorry I misunderstood really confusing how you said that yeah it was confusing yeah yes it was
[00:15:26] confusing and I clarified it got it so anyway who's this king guy right that all of a sudden like he
[00:15:33] came on board and started recording history sure okay king nebusar I pronounced it three different
[00:15:41] ways yeah sorry his reign saw the beginning of a new era characterized by the systematic maintenance
[00:15:49] of chronologically precise historical records he's the first guy that started being like let's
[00:15:55] record some history guys right say yeah his reign also marks the reform of the Babylonian calendar
[00:16:03] uh okay yeah right which again you know we've got um astronomers yeah right right and now we've
[00:16:11] got calendar reforms happening sure because astronomy helps us understand the passage of time
[00:16:18] right yeah it's kind of how we mark the passage of time on a large scale right right so um he
[00:16:25] his reign did history and the calendar and they introduced regular calculated months and they have
[00:16:33] some kind of 18 year cycle that they they started which I would love to learn like what did
[00:16:39] that do right right like it was just a larger period of time like how to discuss right certain
[00:16:46] time period yeah yeah and they even came up with the earliest forms of the zodiac
[00:16:52] hmm so were these astronomers or astrologists they were a mix of both okay right for the time
[00:17:00] they were astronomers because they were studying the night sky okay and they were understanding
[00:17:05] that the stars move in certain patterns and that the you know certain things affect the planet
[00:17:13] in such a way right and that is ultimately zodiac is to the recognition that there are different
[00:17:18] celestial beings things in the sky at any given moment sure now yes they were also astrologers
[00:17:26] and that they assigned other meanings to those yeah so that's why I say a bit of both sure but
[00:17:33] but I mean still it's very impressive that they had that understanding back then right right
[00:17:38] so yeah um so this gets us into the astronomical diaries okay because remember I was like wait what
[00:17:44] the fuck is that right so you can see how like this is related to what we're reading but like way off
[00:17:50] yes it's definitely a rabbit hole right but I couldn't not it was so cool yeah okay you look less
[00:17:57] than impressed no i it's interesting i just you know you're just like but it doesn't have anything
[00:18:02] to do it it's about the history of the time right so there's a lot happening in Babylon at the time
[00:18:12] and I just find that very interesting as relates to what we're reading sure and that's the tie-in
[00:18:19] I see okay you know all right do we do we tie it in or is it we just going over this stuff
[00:18:25] I'm just curious you know not really I mean no the the tie-in is that so this stuff really was
[00:18:31] happening over there okay and here's some other things that were happening in case somebody was
[00:18:35] waiting for the tie-in I just make sure there isn't one you can stop now okay you could
[00:18:39] stop listening right now okay I mean don't because it's still interesting stuff yeah right no
[00:18:44] it doesn't get back to like this is just always an interesting that's it you went down a rabbit hole
[00:18:48] I went down a rabbit lost in the rabbit hole I didn't get lost I know exactly where I am okay
[00:18:54] so the astronomical diaries yes okay they are also on clay tablets okay and they but they weren't
[00:19:00] just about stargazing okay so astronomy astrology whatever they weren't just about looking at the stars
[00:19:07] got it they tracked political happenings they made predictions based on those observations
[00:19:14] and they recorded everyday details like weather and green prices oh wow yeah so I mean it was like
[00:19:21] a newspaper right right like that's so cool yeah and today all of these records are housed in
[00:19:27] the British Museum huh okay so we could literally go see these tablets right you know what I mean
[00:19:34] yeah that's so cool to me yeah so going back to that king guy uh-huh whose name I've pronounced
[00:19:41] three different ways now and is not Nebuchadnezzar right the original king let's start with all this
[00:19:45] yes tracking stuff yes he gathered the records of his predecessors all of them and he destroyed them
[00:19:53] oh thus ensuring that the history of the Chaldean kings began with him
[00:20:00] how cool is that right yeah um I mean yeah right history is written by the by the winners yeah um just
[00:20:08] to kind of put in a time place of where he was one of his contemporaries uh was the Assyrian king
[00:20:17] Tigloth Pilsar which we talked about earlier okay he's one of those Sargon guys okay okay um
[00:20:24] he actually became a vassal under Tigloth Pilsar got it yeah okay at one point all right anyway
[00:20:33] now you know that there are clay tablets that talk about the Babylonian problems that we were
[00:20:41] seeing hinted at yeah the Bible there's a tie in but what problems were they um they were political
[00:20:49] they were stretched to thin they were got it um there was unrest they they had probably
[00:20:57] picked up a little more than they could handle and right um you know that's why all of those
[00:21:02] little nations were gathered together to be late now is our time let's strike by the fire's hot
[00:21:07] got it you know there's a crack in the structure let's get them got it got it and Jeremiah was like
[00:21:13] you're not though right right they're good like you're don't be foolish right you think you know
[00:21:20] a thing and you don't yeah so that was my little rabbit hole okay and why don't know that we
[00:21:27] can actually call that a Q and A for 26 through 30 but it is our Q and A through 26 to 30 so um
[00:21:35] hopefully you guys enjoyed the rabbit hole there and um well we did answer one question did we
[00:21:41] yeah were there um false prophets amongst those who are exiled to Babylon there you go the answer is
[00:21:48] yes okay were they really writing letters yes yes they were we answered two questions we
[00:21:53] answered two questions all right okay fair enough all right well that was our Q and A for today
[00:21:59] sure as fuck was and we will be back tomorrow on Sunday with
[00:22:03] second largest book club and then I will get the weekly wrap out wrap up I can never say that right
[00:22:08] like you said you said it once a couple weeks did I was I impressed myself no you didn't even notice
[00:22:13] I think it's because you didn't overthink it but I noticed it because I love you got it so yeah
[00:22:18] we'll get the weekly wrap up out and then we'll be back on Monday with Isaiah chapter 3 no
[00:22:25] Jeremiah chapter 31 look you fucked me up all right guys we'll see you then bye
[00:22:38] hey wife I guess that's the end but husband that's just sad it doesn't have to be we are on lots of
[00:22:44] social media platforms like twitter our handle there is sacrilege sonners score D for D's nuts oh my
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[00:24:00] k-bye
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